Elastic Balderdash

I do a lot of things that have to do with storytelling. Here I reblog pictures and memes and junk, but check me out at my professional blog to see the kindsa stuff that I do. emmettbaber.tumblr.com

[depsidase]

[latoeb]

The morning after Halloween.

No one could wait for all hallows morn,

All would awake with hair freshly shorn,

It was taken by a creature who knows not of laws,

It had taken your locks, that one Spooky Claws.

No one is certain, none can be sure,

What is it, it wants, with a patch of your fur,

Most don't complain, because as it retreats,

It's trailing behind it an assortment of sweets!

Did you dress up? Did you have lots of fun?

Go bobbing for apples? Eat sticky bun?

It's important you do, and here it is scrawled,

If you don't go have fun, he'll take more 'till your bald!

Take head of my message, ponder and pause,

Think how next year, you will please Spooky Claws

[twistcmyk]

this is VERY late but i’m still archiving it

[ihitthat-sexually]

[margisnailia]

when a hog steals your pants and you have to hunt it down with an ax

book of hours, use of st. omer, c. 1318-25

the british library, ms 36684, f. 31r

[dailyquests]

Complete Therapy with a rank of S or Higher.

[ichorvid]

[justheretobreakthings]

So within two days of each other, Fox News writes an article comparing aromanticism and asexuality to pedophilia, and then Matt Walsh releases a video saying asexuality is a mental illness and asexuals are tricking teenagers into having depression.

Not sure what’s going on right now over in Conservative World, but it’s a hell of wild U-turn for them to suddenly switch from “Oh no! The left is sexualizing our children!” to “Oh no! The left is asexualizing our children!”

[ohnoitstbskyen]

It’s a reminder, I guess, that they’re coming for all of us. The fash and the white supremacists will not make nice distinctions between the queers when they put us up against the wall. There is no gatekeeping, no label-policing, no purity-purging and no assimilation that any of us can do that will save us. They want us dead, and while they’ll start with whoever is most vulnerable at any given time, they’ll get around to all of us eventually.

Queer solidarity means all of us because the fash are coming for all of us.

[txttletale]

this is the fucking funniest thing ive ever seen im in tears of laughter. (right axis) . this is a work of fucking art

[papasmoke]

As you all can see when I started to purchase $10 pocket knives at gas stations in late 2017 and continued to do so once a year every year the gap between my annual military expenditure and that of the U.S. quickly began to close.

[apas-95]

here it is on one axis lmao

[headspace-hotel]

Christ someone show this to the xkcd guy

[quasi-normalcy]

How to Lie With Graphs

[gaaraofsburbia]

It's actually worse. Because the US side was using intervals of 100 with the same spacing as everyone else using intervals of 50.

[asmeesh]

Morning warmup. It’s -20 out and the birds are extra round

[kieshells-deactivated20240611]

Welcome

[ink-shaming]

original post

bonus:

[russiawave]

[magistrate-of-mediocrity]

Those am him leafs

[weatherall]

#leaf him alone

[loish]

Every month I create a monthly challenge for my flame tier patrons, and I participate in it myself too. Last month’s challenge was creating autumn-themed studies together, which is my favorite thing to draw this time of year! If you want to participate in this month’s challenge, sign up to the Flame tier on my Patreon 🔥 Not only do you get a monthly challenge, but also monthly Q&A sessions and access to a special area of the discord community where you can share your work! Sign up here: patreon.com/loish

[shisasan]

𝙹𝚊𝚗𝚞𝚊𝚛𝚢 𝟸𝟶, 𝟷𝟿𝟸𝟸 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝙳𝚒𝚊𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜 𝙾𝚏 𝙵𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚣 𝙺𝚊𝚏𝚔𝚊, 𝟷𝟿𝟷𝟺-𝟷𝟿𝟸𝟹

[libraryjournal]

[signal-failure]

Person with housemates can study.

Person who has spent all their cash on rent and food still has a place to get out of the house and do something interesting.

Cool community classes and community art shows.

ESL tutoring.

Tax prep and forms.

[talixagain]

tbh fuck anyone who says a single bad thing about libraries

[diplotomodon]

Not content I normally reblog but libraries are super important and our world would be diminished without them.

[smallswingshoes]

The library was how I was able to read so many books as a kid that my parents wouldn’t have been able to afford.

[insomination]

Libraries are one of the only places on Earth that treats people the same no matter how much money you have. We can’t lose that.

[heywriters]

Every public library I’ve ever known is a quiet place for teens to do homework or internet surf after school while their parents are getting off work. If they aren’t doing either, they are curled up in a chair somewhere with a stack of books and look extremely comfy.

[bubblebaath]

nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom

[selfgoals]

If you can’t reblog this, unfollow me now.

[sunkissedspider]

it’s fucking disgusting that i just lost 6 followers

[hotel-firingsquad]