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@ldruk
If you really love each other, then nothing should be able to break you apart, especially not distance. Long distance relationships can work just as well as ‘normal relationships’ - if not better because it makes it even more special when you are together.
And he said the most horrible thing to me. "I don't want to say something horrible now but. If he already planned on moving here a german girlfriend would be the best he can do." We are together for so long already and we are so happy. I hate my dad.
Honestly the best thing to do is just ignore your Dad. The likelihood is that he’s rather old fashioned and can’t believe that you can find love online or love someone in another country. Most parents are the same when it comes to LDRs and it’s understandable really, it’s the way they were raised - they didn’t have computers and internet really back then so it wasn’t possible and they now just refuse to believe it is possible.Just ignore him and I know that his comments will hurt for a while, but you’ll learn to deal with it and when you’re with your bf, he’ll see how happy you are and might change his mind.
Hope that helped.Feel free to ask more questions or message me.
This message might come in two parts. But I'm totally frustrated right now. My boyfriend lives in Italy while I am here in germany. He plans on moving here next year, he planned to do so before me aswell. Now my father came to me. (1/2)
I’ll answer part2
2 days ago, I said goodbye to my boyfriend for the first time without knowing when I will see him next. We've both agreed that we definitely will see each other again but it's just so difficult to be in this ambiguity. what can we do to stay as positive as we were when we knew when we would see each other again? sorry if this was ramble-y
Saying goodbye and not knowing exactly when you’re going to be together next is probably the hardest part about being in a LDR and I’m going to be honest and say that it never gets easier. However you just have to stay positive and even though you don’t know when you’re next going to be together, talk to eachother about what you want to do when you’re next together and basically plan everything - even if you don’t do any of the things, it gives you both something to look forwards to and that will help with the distance.Another thing to do is to talk to eachother about when you’re no longer a LDR and you just count as in a relationship because you’re together and not going to be apart again.
Hope I helped :)Feel free to ask more questions or message me.
I've been in an LDR (I'm in Texas, he is in Virginia) for 4 years with an older guy...I plan on moving in with him after I graduate. How do I tell my parents, who dislike him very much?
Honestly the answer depends on if they have the problem with him as a person or if they have a problem with the age difference or if they have the problem with the distance.
If they have a problem with him as a person, they’ll just have to learn to get along with him because if you love him, it shouldn’t matter what they think - you being happy is all that should matter. Maybe discuss reasons why they don’t like him and maybe try to talk through those things with them because they might start to dislike him less if you tell them some of the things they’re thinking are wrong. Maybe after they dislike him less, you could tell them or just go straight out and tell them but tell them you’re happy.
If they have a problem with the age difference, that shouldn’t really matter, especially as 4 years isn’t really a big age difference in the scheme of things. Just ignore them if this is the case and just go straight out and tell them about it because they’ll forget about the difference when they realize you’re happy.
If they have a problem with the distance, just tell them that you can still talk often and you’ll visit whenever you have the chance. Honestly if it’s the distance it’s going to be because they’re worried about you being a long way away, but that’s normal but they’ll have to just learn to live with it.
Hope this helped :)Feel free to ask more questions or message me - also congratulations on making it through a LDR.
I’m currently in a ldr with my bf and we haven’t met, (he’s in the US and I’m in the UK.) it’s quite new but we’ve known each other a long while. He’s everything to me but all of a sudden I find myself questioning a lot, like can this be real?Is it ever going to work? Etc and it’s made me feel numb to our relationship, like all the spark has gone. Not sure if I’ve closed myself off from him, or has it fizzled out?Is this normal, will it get better?Thoughts?Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks
Honestly if you’re constantly questioning if it’s going to work, then that’s why the spark has gone - if you love him then nothing else should matter. I admit that it’s hard to be away from your significant other, but that makes it even better when you do meet because you’ve been talking to them for longer than most people have to theirs so you already know everything about them, but then you get to be physically with them.
I recommend that you talk to him about it, do some date nights on Skype where one of you screenshares a movie with sound on so the other can hear too and watch it together and just spend as much time together online as possible until you can be together - that way it puts your mind at ease, you’re spending time with him and also it’s a romantic thing to do which should relax your mind to the whole concept.
Long distance relationships are always going to be questioned, but if you really try, they’re worth it - forget what people say, if you love someone, you can be with them. Although if the spark has gone, maybe move back to just being friends until you meet and then maybe you can change back to dating.
Hope I helped :)Feel free to ask more questions or message me.
I’m back!
I took a break from Tumblr for quite a while (I almost forgot that I had one honestly) but I’m back now and I’m going to go through all the questions I’ve been asked whilst away and start posting again :)
He just came! (and I went off-anon) And while I am still a bit nervous I have to say it's way better by now! Thanks for the thoughtful answer to my ask earlier <3
I’m glad I could help! :)
Always here if you need any advice or anything :D
im meeting my ldr girlfriend for the first time in a couple weeks, we've only been dating a month but im so nervous and so excited at the same time. im only out to a couple friends, her, and my mom. im so scared to be out to anyone else, including the rest of my family. how do i get over the fear of rejection even if i dont tell anyone else? also, how do i stop overthinking ever little thing thats going to happen when i meet her, im scared lol.
Being nervous is normal when meeting your long distance partner for the first time. Just relax and breathe and you’ll be fine :) - once you’re with her you’ll forget about being nervous and everything will be fine.
As for telling people about her, it might take a while for you to work up the courage to do it, but ultimately it’s the best thing to do because then you feel more like a couple afterwards. Your family will want you to be happy, they won’t reject you or her for being together, if she makes you happy then that’s all that should matter to them. As for telling other people, their opinions shouldn’t really matter, if you’re happy being in a relationship with her, then don’t let anyone stop you. Nothing should stop you from being happy or in a LDR. :)
You can’t really stop overthinking things that might happen when you’re with her, however you could plan what you’re going to do when you’re together, for example if you want to go on a romantic walk or play video games or whatever you both enjoy doing. Once you’re together you probably won’t even have to think, everything will happen naturally. It might be awkward to start with and things might go wrong, but that’’s bound to happen the first time. But think about it this way, everything that can go wrong can be a learning experience too. Instead of thinking about everything that could go wrong, try thinking about everything good that could happen :)
Hope I helped - Let me know how it goes? :)Feel free to ask more questions or message me.
When you meet your long distance partner for the first time things will likely be awkward and weird and you’ll probably feel like doing things in the picture. It’ll get less awkward as you get used to being together. Being with your partner is the nicest thing after you’ve been apart for a long time, or just any time at all really. I’m here if anyone has any questions about LDRs or wants to talk. I always try to reply to asks and messages :)
The guy I'm in a ldr with is coming the second time since we started to spend some days with me, I am super nervous but super happy, is there any way to not be so nervous though? I'd rather only be happy and not nervous tbh xD
Being nervous is a normal thing and I know it sucks being nervous when you don’t want to be but really it’s hard to stop. One way to be less nervous is to just remember that he’s the person you’ve spoken to a lot before and being around him isn’t much different (except it’s probably much nicer). Another way is to just take a deep breath occasionally and just relax. Be yourself. He loves you and the likelihood is that won’t change. Push all your worries away and just try to enjoy the time with him. Live in the moment is another way to phrase that I guess.
Hope that helps. - let me know how it goes :)Feel free to ask more questions or inbox me.
So I'm falling for this beautiful girl. She lives in Canada and I live in the U.S. I really like her and message her nonstop, but sometimes I'm just like "Okay what do I say to her now?" Got any good tips for keeping the conversation going/conversation starters? Thanks in advance! 😁
I recommend doing things together such as playing games or watching movies together online (Skype screenshare or start a video at the same time?). Doing things together makes conversation come naturally and it stops forced conversations that can get boring... The best thing to do is find something which you can do together that will lead to a conversation, it could be anything. Personally, I always play games online with my girlfriend and it helps keep the conversation constantly :)Hope I helped.
Feel free to ask more questions or message me :)
Thank you so much for the advice!!!
You’re very welcome!
Feeling empty lost
So I started talking to this person a while a go, we clicked immediately, love at first sight, long hours on the phone, we had it all, then all of a sudden, he feels like he can no longer deal with our LDR.. He cut me off, I’m hurt… Haven’t stop crying,, I’m empty… Lost…. I miss him… I feel like I’m drowning…with no one to help… I’m suffocating…. How can I move on.. When he is no longer around….and the worst part is that he loves me too…. He cares for me…. But is scared of the future… Because of situation in his life… I miss him I want him back… Feeling helpless……
It sounds like you had a good LDR going to start with, but as time goes on it does get harder to be in a long distance relationship, especially if you aren’t together much or haven’t met in real life at all. You say he still loves you but when you think about it, if he really does then he’d want to get back with you and realize that he’s made a mistake by leaving you. If you love someone, you don’t leave them just because life got hard or because you couldn’t handle the distance, you do something to make it so you can stay with the person you love. Honestly, I recommend talking to him about how you feel and see if there’s any way you two can stay together. Stay strong and stay by his side if he’s going through a hard patch of life and he will be grateful and it will show you love for him. I hope that helped :) - I’m here for you if you need someone to talk to!
My boyfriend and I both live in the US but we're 2,000 miles apart. We met online and we've never met irl but I think I'm in love with him. We talk 24/7 and Skype sometimes too. This is my 1st relationship though so idk if I'm going too fast.
You don’t have to meet someone in real life to be in love with them, you can fall in love with someone’s personality and the rest will work itself out from there. Communication is key in a relationship so talking a lot is good :)As for if you’re going too fast, I can’t really tell you that because you haven’t really said anything about you or your relationship and it also depends on you and your partner as well.Hope I helped.Feel free to ask more questions or for advice through asks or messages :)
If you love someone, it doesn’t matter how far away they are, you can make it work! If you love each other then the distance shouldn’t stop you from dating. You can work through it and end up being together! I believe in you all.
If you need any advice or have any questions about long distance relationships then I’ll be happy to help!
It would be stupid if I said I found a boy from my dreams this summer because he's so much better than that. I just don't get it how a world came up with such a beautiful person. Anyways, he's from another country and it takes me about 9 hours to get there... I haven't seen him for 211 days (6 months and 26 days). And I will see him for 122 days. We will spend whole summer together, but eventually he will have to go away for a whole year again and I don't think I will survive one more "goodbye".
You’re going to get to spend 122 days together and honestly, that’s a lot of time in a LDR, a lot of people only get to see their other half for a few days or weeks ever few months and it doesn’t add up to that much. I know it’s hard being away from the person you love for a long time (and almost 7 months is a very long time) but it will always be worth it for the time you’re together. If I had to, I’d wait a year just for a few seconds with my girlfriend. It’s always worth it to be with the person you love, even though the time when you’re apart is hard, it’s all forgotten and completely worth it when you’re finally together again.Hope I helped :)Feel free to ask for more advice through asks or messages, I’m happy to help.