(A tall jock happily walks out of the store with a tin of ice cream and a can of whipped cream)
“Ah, what a good cheat day this’ll be. Haven’t had sweets in a while! Good thing my buddy recommended me this stuff, and they both are even made for gainers like me! …Is it even a cheat day if all my foods are gonna be packed with protein? Eh, who cares, I’ll order a pizza or something when I get home to make it a proper cheat day.”
He walks home and sets his ice cream on the counter, still having not properly read the label.
[GNR: Gainer Ice Cream- Made For True Gainers]
(Warning- Causes an increase in hunger, and stomach capacity, with side effects including sluggishness, laziness, increased weight gain, alongside more sizable belches and louder stomach noises
Do not eat for at least 5 minutes after each use of GNR* brand products, as the effects may pass onto other foods
Do not mix with any other GNR* brand products, as results are not tested)
An almost identical label could be spotted on the whipped cream, as it is of the same brand- and has the same unfortunate side effects. He would’ve known this, had he cared to read it.
Lying back on the couch, the unknowing jock flings the cap off the GNR: Gainer Whipped Cream and chugs it before he makes a call to the local pizza place…
“Heya! Can I get one large pizza… (GRRRRROOOOOWWWWWLLL) oh wow, maybe just a couple more… fourty large pizzas (GWWWOOAAARR) and twenty orders of breadsticks (GRRROOOAAAN) and fifty two-liters of soda? The address? Yeah uhh…”
After the call is finished, he looks down at his gurgling gut, confused as to why it would be so hungry- Until he notices his gut has bulged out a whole two feet!
“WOAH. Okay, I’m absolutely sure that wasn’t there before… Maybe it’s from the whipped cream? Y’know, aerated cans and such? That would explain the noise… I’m super hungry though, but it must just be because it’s my cheat day, and my gut’s ready to bulk!”
He goes to slap his seemingly tight gut and sure enough- WHAP! -But what he didn’t expect was his hand sinking in a few inches deep into his definitely flabby midsection
“Uhh, okay, that’s not how a gut works, I think… Unless it means my gut is ready to digest all that pizza I ordered? (GWWWOOOAAAAARRRRP) Ugh, alright, I can’t wait any longer- I’m gonna dig into this ice cream!”
And with a spoon and a hungry gut, the ex-jock got to work. Amazingly, he scarfed down the entire tin of ice cream before the pizzas arrived- adding another 28 feet of pure flab onto his gut. With this, his legs and arms grew outward with 2 feet of fat in each direction, with moobs flowing down and his chin developing into its own pile of lard. Before, when it was just the whipped cream, it turned all of his muscles into fat, and added a hefty belly onto him- placing him at around 170 lbs. But now, with the ice cream adding onto that, it ballooned him up past. 2000 lbs of fat- over a TON.
Not having time to have fully taken this in, a knock on the door is heard, and the door opens
“Hey man, I thought I’d be your delivery guy, since I recommended those gainer foods to ya- WOAH! You really packed on the pounds man, huh! Well, y’know what, I think you’ve got this all under control man. See ya at the gym tomorrow, man! I think?”
And with that, the blob’s friend tossed the pizzas up on his belly, alongside the breadsticks, and set the soda down up there, too.
“Ough… (Huff, wheeze) I need… More food…”
And with that, the 1-ton pile of flab somehow got to work, shoving pizza after pizza down his gullet, along with a 2-liter getting chugged between each. After the pizza stash ran dry, he moved onto the breadsticks.
The breadsticks were eaten in packs of two, with another whole 2-liter chugged between each feast.
Plumping out by 2 feet with each slice of pizza, 4 feet for every 2-liter, and 12 per bunch of breadsticks left the flabby mound spilling out 1,110 feet in each direction. Having shattered his walls from all his weight, the 74,000 lb mountain of fat could do nothing but yell for help… In his own special way-
“Hey! (Wheeze, pant) You! (Huff, huff) Bring me some more (Wheeze) of that Gainer Ice Cream… (Huff, Pant) And another couple hundred pizzas, too!”
(BWWWWWOOOOAAAAAARRRRRPP) (BWEEEEEEAAAAARRRRRRRRPPPHHH)(GWWOOOAARRRGGGLL) (GRRROOAAAN)
“I’m (Pant, Huff) Starving! (Wheeze)”
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