it’s unfair how i have the responsibility to heal myself when i didn’t cause my wound in the first place

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@leoscoffee
it’s unfair how i have the responsibility to heal myself when i didn’t cause my wound in the first place
Nobody has ever apologized for the fucked up shit they did to me, they’ve only blamed me for the way i reacted.
i’m the problem. i’m draining to be around. i turn everything good into something toxic. i can’t stop myself from ruining everything, no matter how hard i try. i’m the only one to blame. i’m poison to everyone around me, i destroy everything i touch
When phoebe bridgers said “I hate you for what you did but I miss you like a little kid” I was shot through time and space to see 8 year old me with my dad
I’m sad in a way that’s exhausting and painful
im tired of being a burden
It's so frustrating not being obsessed with anything like what even is the purpose of life
“are you okay?” no i’m not can we please change the subject before i start crying
I realized today that I have stopped living life. I’m literally just trying to get to the next day, just living in the thought of tomorrow. I‘m not living, I’m waiting. And the problem is, I don’t know what I’m exactly waiting for. I‘m kind of scared for what it might be.
sucks that i’ve lost my life to mental illness just because some people thought it was okay to treat me like shit
Hate that I can physically feel when my mental illness gets bad
I don't know how many times I survived myself without telling anyone.
-V. J.