when something bad happens to someone you dont like and you have to pretend you’re sad but on the inside you’re like
cherry valley forever
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Andulka
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shark vs the universe
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@leprechaunzee
when something bad happens to someone you dont like and you have to pretend you’re sad but on the inside you’re like
i went to the dentist today and my dentist honest to god said “can i ask you a question…….what the hell is in your mouth”
it was in awe lmao
then the hygienist and assistant all came over to look too and they were like “wooooow” and my ass was sitting there like
oh my god i posted this and then went to work, and
story time
okay so to preface this, my hometown where i’m originally from is a really fucking weird place. like from the outside it seems like a normal suburban town, but once you’re there for awhile you get the feeling that’s something’s not…quite all together. a lot of people are really fucking weird there — so much so that that was a running joke in school growing up, that people in the town were just like that. everyone knew not to go out to the farm lands surrounding the town especially at night, we called it “the cuts” and people used to disappear out there all the time or get shot at by the especially weird people that would live out there. the news was and still is truly a thing of horror. every time i come back i’m regaled with even more stories of crazy shit that has happened there.
to put it in perspective we generally never had “normal crime” like robbery or anything like that when i lived there, though that did happen sometimes. the news stories were always like, “a kid was kidnapped by local residents and tortured in a house around the corner,” “a random person was chased down and shot for sport in a really nice neighborhood,” “someone was gored to death by a bull while out car shopping,” etc. (these are all real, btw). everyone does drugs and the whole town is located really close to a government site where they test nuclear weapons and chemicals and shit. this is how i grew up, in this bizarre environment.
i need to preface it this way so that you get that it’s weird. it’s a fucking weird place. i used to listen to the welcome to night vale podcast and make comparisons from it to my hometown, that’s how weird it is.
i only say this so you know that this town is where i got my orthodontics from.
all the kids in my town went to this one particular orthodontist. i also used to go to a dentist in town that a lot of people went to as well. i had a permanent retainer put on my bottom teeth after braces and no one had ever said anything to me about the model of retainer itself or it being weird type of retainer at all. i saw a ton of other people (mostly other kids that were my age at the time) that had the same type of retainer as me too so i never thought about it.
so i kept my retainer in — it’s never caused me problems and it keeps my teeth straight, why not?
however i went to a dentist for the first time in a metropolitan area now, and when he saw it in my mouth his literal first reaction was to say “uh can i ask you a question….what the hell is that”
LITERALLY the words that he said
which in hindsight makes almost too much sense. of course my town of all towns would put these weird unnecessary contraptions in kids’ mouths, and of course it happened so much that everyone just thought it was normal. that sounds exactly, to a T, like my hometown.
my permanent bottom retainer is apparently this prototype that is so rare that he’s literally never seen it before in his life, not in dental school, nowhere. it’s not that it’s an outdated type, it’s just rare as fuck. they were still staring at pictures of it on my chart in wonder when i left the office.
so just know somewhere out there, in a weird ass suburban town where they test nuclear weapons and a good portion of the residents go fucking nuts, there’s probably hundreds of people still walking around with this same contraption in their mouth that exists nowhere else in the world thinking, “yeah, that’s cool. that makes sense. let me go drink the definitely not-contaminated water now and never move away from here.”
This sounds like an X-files episode
Okay, so I looked into it and I think that the town is Tracy, California.
I looked up the bull-murder thing OP mentioned and Tracy seemed to be only town that came up with a matching case. Though the man didn’t actually die from his injuries everything else matches up one for one. So just to make sure that it was the right town I looked to see if there was any murder-torture of young people in Tracy, and unfortunately there was. It was a 17 year old boy who escaped and survived the torture. And just to solidify that it was in fact Tracy I looked up shootings in residential areas and there was one of a 20 year old man who was shot and killed in a nice neighborhood.
Okay, but I decided to look into Tracy more to find out more information about it and the town is super suspicious. There’s been a lot of murders and shooting in the town. Back in 2009 an 8 year old girl, Sandra Cantu, was kidnapped and murdered by a Sunday school teacher who said she had no idea why she killed Sandra. Another case happened in 2018 when four underage boys were shot and one was killed by four teenage boys. There’s a lot of news stories on shootings, homicides, and drug busts in that town. It’s a really cute town from the outside, if you just look up Tracy, California there’s a lot of really cute businesses and nice articles on sweet things that happen in the town, but if you actually look into it the town is really sketchy.
So yeah, this sketchy town with a military base, multiple homicides and shootings is maybe Tracy, California.
………………..yeah, you guys caught me
i grew up in tracy
also i have to add another person’s tags to this since it’s honesty hour because they’re hilarious and true
Honestly I wasn’t even surprised when I found out it was in California. Even less surprised when googled it and found out it was near the Bay Area. That sounds about right.
Apparently the motto is “Think Inside the Triangle” and I’m not sure how to feel about that.
i like it when italian italians get mad at italian americans for calling themselves italian
i feel like some people in the notes might be overreacting
I saw this post by @irrationalgame (credit for Thomas pictures go to them) and instantly thought of this:
So I had to make this:
Have a great day partner
there are two things i know for certain ONE bert and ernie are gay TWO you are not gonna die a virgin. not on my watch.
The Eric Andre New Year’s Eve Spooktacular
And it’s not because I’m lonely. And it’s not because it’s New Year’s Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.
When Harry Met Sally (1989) dir. Rob Reiner
Summary of the last 12 hours for the poor/blessed souls who slept through everything:
Castiel (A main Supernatural character) confess his love for Dean (Main Supernatural character). Castiel is then thrown into the Empty (aka a version of Hell aka Super Hell) right afterwards and dies. It is revealed in the script that Dean thinks of him as a friend. This is very funny because Supernatural has been going on for almost two decades with rampant queerbaiting and decides that immediately killing off the only main mlm character in their last season and sending them off to hell is a benevolent gift for their fans.
There is a rumour started by the New York Post that Valdimir Putin is resigning in the near future due to Parkinson's. This ties in with the Supernatural debacle because people started tweeting about it while complaining/rejoicing at the Gay Representation™. This then became a meme and spread the rumor further.
Georgia and Pennsylvania flipped blue (11/06/2020) and Joe Biden is currently in a good lead.
The Trump organization is suing multiple states to recount the ballots. The majority are overturned, but I think Nevada is recounting.
Pennsylvania says it might take a week or two to count all the ballots.
There was a famous artist on Twitter revealed to be roleplaying as Ted Bundy.
The band System of a Down releases music for the first time in 15 years.
BTS rapper Yoongi goes under surgery for a shoulder problem.
I find out what a brain melting feels like.
The state flipping news being in the middle of this list is the peak of comedy.
You used to read to me, um, when I was little, I— I mean, really little, from that— from that old, uh… Classics Illustrated comic book. You remember that? Knights of the Round Table. Had all of King Arthur’s knights, and they were all on the quest for the Holy Grail. And I remember looking at this picture of Sir Galahad, and, and, and he was kneeling, and— and light streaming over his face.
L'ala nera o Il tocco dell'angelo by Roberto Ferri
Sometimes I think about lesbian icon renée vivien lauging so hard she had to leave a lecture bc the man was talking about how a book of anonymously published love poetry was the pinnacle depiction of a young man's desire towards women...... but it was her book. She wrote it. About her girlfriend.
This the one!
Stop
The Duchess of Cambridge poses for official portraits to mark the 100th anniversary of the British Vogue in Norfolk, England -April 30th 2016.
📷 : Josh Olins/British Vogue.
I understand this is more who Kate actually is, but I'm disappointed it wasn't more dressy. I wasn't expecting tiaras, but at least 1 long gown with hair and makeup?