LEPTIR CHAHAR

 She/her  ● Roaring 20s  ●  Original written pieces ●  ig: @leptirchahar  🌻  

[leptirchahar]

Disclaimer: Dark

New Year's Eve. It flutters again, small movements, losing again, a feather or two. Slowly the momentum builds, my heart is sinking low. Again, my hands will be red. I will choke it; again.

I told you; I knew it; It will move again. But my reflexes are faster, my hands grip it through the wings, and nails digging into its belly. Oh, you small fierce & feisty Swift.

With the strings of useless shitty excuses I bind it again; even its wings. Unaware I cut it here and there, somewhere bruising, somewhere bleeding blue. I bind the limbs too.

Why are you making so much noise? My head hurts because of your shrieks. I fix its beak with hot glue. You look so sweet, darling Just like they want you to.

But remove that stare from your eyes, too much passion is dangerous for your kind. I paint its cheeks with makeup and bright pink blush. Wow, you look like a doll. Once again, you're secured.

Now I don't know how to wipe this blood off my hands with my wings tied and bloody blank fucking mind. I smile in the mirror once again with blank eyes.

I know you'll flutter again little shit of my heart, the very next year on the very same fucking night. I know I have to do it; all over again.

— LEPTIR CHAHAR  ©

[leptirchahar]

EMPTY - FULL

I'm a vessel, half empty and half full. Sinking, sailing, wailing and failing. Trying to hold on for a few more breaths, in this horrendous peaceful sea, where I've to drown to my death. Flapping around in the lap of these waves, the last of my soul craves something sweet in this fishy and salty sea. I hope to sink deep, not to freeze in my forever sleep. I managed the frame with many holes, and brittle bones. But how will I handle my frostbitten soul?

— LEPTIR CHAHAR  ©

[leptirchahar]

IT’S LOVE

On the dinner table, when I declared my love; 

You asked me with a smile, “who is he, Dove”?

When I told you it was kind of abnormal;

From there, things went serious and formal.

Then I came out, you started to shout;

Told me to leave and get out.

You told me I was bringing the family to shame;

Cried that your love and upbringing were to blame.

Then you tried to bind my wings;

Using your love as the strings.

You tried the strings that are shame and society;

And told me if I oppose I will be punished by almighty.

And at that moment you forget about all the things;

That you told me about love and what it brings.

I know the chances of reconciliation are slim;

But Mom, I love her (not him).

— LEPTIR CHAHAR  ©

[leptirchahar]

This was the very first piece I wrote in my entire life something like 6 months ago because I was so frustrated with people justifying their theories about lgbtqiia+ community like this love is not normal; they are not normal; they have some mental issues; or simply any idiotic shit. 

And a few days back I was talking to a friend, and she was so insecure and scared because the family she loves most can’t accept her and want her to change. Like WTF?

I know families are the priority for everyone, but if your family member is coming out or your friend or any other given human in this world. Then fucking accept it. They are normal. We are abnormal if we are labeling these things weird. It’s love. 

If you can survive on the carbon dioxide for your entire life rather than the oxygen, then I’ll change my opinion.

P.S. Love is too beautiful to be hidden in the closet.

[leptirchahar]

Love is immense feelings breathing in tiny things.

Love is in her moonstruck eyes. Love is in his mischievous smiles. Love is in their forever dreams. Love is in the crush of teens. Love is in the mother's sleepless nights. Love is in the father's pride. Love is in a friend's teasing about your date. Love is in finding the best friend in a roommate. Love is endless feelings, breathing in many little things. Sometimes it's even beyond that. And, Sometimes it's in just being.

— LEPTIR CHAHAR  ©

P.S. Happy Valentine’s Day :)

[leptirchahar]

BORN AGAIN

Born again after the day you die and you'll see the celebration of the end of your life.

They mourned you for a day and on the very next, busy with a list of items to buy.

Born again after the day you die, you'll see the girl you had a crush on, her hands in the hair of the other guy. She was never actually shy.

Born again after the day you die, you'll see your gardens and flowers. Once again blooming and observing the sky.

Born again after the day you die, you'll see many of you in the people on the streets as they pass by.

Born again after the day you die, you'll see the things that you sacrificed for, Most of them were lies.

Born again after the day you die, you'll see your pet lying by your bed, to whom you never said goodbye.

Born again after the day you die, you'll see your family sitting at the dinner table, silent and mourning inside.

Born again after the day you die, you'll see no one on your bed, and lying on the floor are your scattered clothes and colorful ties.

Born again after the day you die, you'll see everyone is here, except you and your eyes.

Born again after the day you die as a ghost or a shade to realize and to inform others in the meantime.

But now, It's too late, and don't try hard to be the good guy. Because They too have to be born again after the day they die.

— LEPTIR CHAHAR  ©

[leptirchahar]

LANGUAGE

Tell me which one to learn that can soothe my burns. Tell me, I'll learn. But tell me the one that can make a man sober before his life is over. Tell me the one in which the son can say "Mother, because of the cancer your death is not far away." Tell me, please the one that helps humans understand why someone is begging on their knees. Tell me the name, or Tell me the words, I'll whisper them to the birds.

Because people of my breed; don't have backbones in their creed.

Tell me, I'll learn.

— LEPTIR CHAHAR  ©

[leptirchahar]

WHAT IS WRONG WITH US?

Holding rag in this darkness, I keep cleaning the rotten carpet of ethics. Knees are bruising, But my hands keep moving, The mind can't comprehend how to stop. Eyes can't adapt to the pitch dark. But ears are alert, Realization dawns, You all are here too.

Some scratching softly, Some rubbing too vigorously. I know that I'm not alone. How come there are so many of us? Trying to remove these stains in the darkness, and hoping for a glimpse of white. Cleaning this tainted carpet of ethics.

What is wrong with us? This house is full of bodies without guts. Few are dancing like puppets, freed on the condition of being muppets. Some keep peeing all over it, Others keep cleaning all their shit. The smell of this home is atrocious, It makes me nauseous.

They are covering the skin of God in red, and if we whispered, we are bad. If and only if, I can know about their scale, I might try not to fail.

Let's get a new carpet. Stop dreaming about turning this obsidian into white.

— LEPTIR CHAHAR  ©

[leptirchahar]

Artistic congruance Words actions or otherwise; Help fashion the actions Of eternity or demise. Your blog is so beautiful The words, fantasies, free-flowable; Whether past or from present All so very benevolent. Leptir Chahar Thank you from afar; For creation of a space For this free thinking race. Human race is that Which I speak and interact; On daily although I keep to my own You’re seen and appreciated; Help from you, thoughts do glean, ‘bout what all this could mean Human emancipated

Not sure how this will be accepted, but you love you some art and felt to send to you first. 

P.S.

To @nc3rdeye

Thanks for writing this. I was ecstatic when I received it. Grateful that you took time to read my pieces and even penned this wonderful piece. I appreciate your love and support. I hope you have a great day, night and a great beautiful life. by @leptirchahar 

[leptirchahar]

Don't mind me. I'm just trying to learn German.

Pics: Pinterest

[leptirchahar]

LEPTIR CHAHAR

Let them know, they matter.

[leptirchahar]

LEPTIR CHAHAR

[leptirchahar]

LEPTIR CHAHAR

What’s your dream world???

[leptirchahar]

— LEPTIR CHAHAR  

Photo: sooba_77

[leptirchahar]

Loving yourself is a very important message for people who live in this age of confusion and hardship. —Min Yoongi(BTS)

[leptirchahar]

[leptirchahar]

Suddenly Dreaming

[leptirchahar]

Last post of 2020. This year has been a important lesson for life. It taught me to be grateful for all the things that I have. I'm thankful for all the love I have received from my family and friends and obviously you guys.