could we ever be enough? baby we could be enough

Larrie Lesbian

[lesbian-vodka]

Welcome to my blog!

lesbian-vodka is back :)

Who am I?

I am yet another fleck of dust in the vast desert that is the internet. I am a larrie - a person who believes Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson are in a long-term monogamous relationship. I am a woman. I am a lesbian. And I am deeply fascinated by queer culture across the globe.

Growing up in an intensely homophobic environment showed me how closeting is a very real thing- not something that was conjured on Tumblr. That experience shapes how I engage with pop culture, especially through the lenses of queerness, identity, and power. I like studying these dynamics both in broad societal contexts and within the specific systems of the music industry, Hollywood, and fandom spaces.

For me, fandom isn't about a ship, or about stanning idols. It is about critical cultural analysis, resistance against the norm, and reclaiming narratives that are often silenced and distorted.

Things this blog is a safe space for:

One Direction

Harry and Louis' solo careers

Discussions about closeting in the music industry and hollywood: PR Stunts, Bearding and Babygate will be discussed.

Critical analysis of any of the above

This is a space for curiosity, respect and nuance. We have open minded conversations here, with no intention to adhere to the narrative. There will be no hive mind or group think. This is my venting space, and will remain as much.

Things this blog isn't a safe space for:

Trolls: You will be blocked. No warnings, no engagement.

Drama mongers: If you disagree with something, you’re free to scroll past- or, if it truly bothers you, to block me. This space is not for those who thrive on stirring up drama, intimidation, or weaponizing cancel culture to derail fandom spaces. If your goal is cyberbullying or antagonism, you won’t find an audience here. The same goes for enablers of the above behaviours. You’ll be blocked without fanfare. This space is for dialogue, not disruption.

Antis and ex-larries: This is a Larrie blog, full stop. Conversations around closeting and the music industry are important, regardless of anyone’s current relationship status. If you're here to argue or try to "debunk" my beliefs, this isn’t the space for you.

An addendum on boundaries, because this needs to be said:

This blog exists to foster thoughtful and respectful conversations. That means not every opinion will entertained, and not every argument will be engaged with. And that's okay!

We are a species of over 7 billion humans, and it is natural that a few of us (if not a lot) will harbour opposing opinions on any situation under the sun. I am clear about what this space is for, and just as clear about what it isn't. This is meant to be my own safe space. If that doesn't align with your expectations, it is absolutely okay! You can, and you should curate your own fandom experience, just as I am doing with mine.

Hope you have a fabulous time larrying on main over here!

[twopoppies]

About Louis shows bringing him more fans. I’ve tried that. I brought one friend to my first show, she said something within the lines of I’m happy we spent the day together, no matter who we saw. Which is… not a glowing review. I don’t think she ever played even one of his songs. To the second show I took another friend, he didn’t comment on the show at all which is unusual for him but his face is very expressive so I could guess his opinion. He wasn’t a fan. I don’t want to compare the boys but it’s hard not to. The first friend I also took to Niall concert - she said it was fun, she even asked about few songs. The second friend I took to Harry’s concert last tour. As soon as the show was done he demanded we go to the next one when he’s in our country again. But then residences happens and said friend actually insisted on us flying to Amsterdam for the show. And we did.

While I had fun at Louis’ shows it was because I was a fan of Louis, not the other way round if you understand what I mean.

I don’t know, it’s frustrating to be honest as a fan.

Yeah. I’m honestly not surprised. I’ve turned people into Harry fans very easily by showing them, or going with them, to his live shows. I have not had the same experience with Louis. It’s a shitty feeling.

[twopoppies]

Hiiii, I've read the anon posts about fandom dynamics, and I don't know if this has been discussed before, since I'm relatively new to Tumblr blogs, but I think one reason why people don't believe Harry and Louis can be a couple is because they don't fit the stereotype of gay men. Harry is seen as having a gentle, calm personality, which relates to his femininity, but his body is stereotypically masculine, so he doesn't fit. Louis isn't delicate in the "femenine" sense; he's more protective, sarcastic, and daring, but he has a body that doesn't fit the mold of total masculinity (which, to me, is toxic). All of this seems ridiculous to me. I'm a gay guy, with friends who are also gay, and I see how many assumptions are made about what it means to be gay in this fandom, and it's often related to physical appearance. I've read comments about how Louis can't be Harry's partner because he's too short, about how Brad was the prototype for Harry, when Harry has always talked about choosing someone who supports you and is your friend, and Louis totally fits that description. And I can't forget to mention how the "long hair Harry" era is seen as his most masculine and intimidating era, when I think anyone who analyzes it carefully will see that it was the beginning of Harry exploring more openly with his clothing, and I'd even say with his femininity.

I've read fanfics, including "Louis bottom," although it's not my favorite trope because it tends to infantilize Louis too much and make him much shorter than he is. So I've come to the conclusion that either the fans (not all of them) try to manipulate the situation to make them fit specific roles in order to be accept them, or when it comes to physical appearance at least, they always find a reason related to height or build to say they can't be a couple. I think if Harry had L's style, and Louis had H's, I know many people still wouldn't believe they were a couple, but I know that some, simply because their styles and bodies fit the roles at that moment, would start to doubt it. I have a similar build and height to Louis, and they probably wouldn't believe me if I said the bottom guys I've been with were taller than me, which isn't unusual in the gay community, but this fandom really needs to open its mind. I'm sorry if I was explicit, but it definitely bothers me to keep seeing all this. At least from my perspective, these roles and comments are very harmful, but I love a short king and a tall babygirl. (I use these terms without assuming anything about their dynamic; it's just my affection.) I love them either way. I'm sorry if I got tangled up in my words, I'm terrible at English.😿

Bless you. I love absolutely everything you said. And your English isn’t terrible in the least.

There are so many harmful stereotypes thrown around in this fandom that really shape how people view Harry, Louis, their relationship dynamics, their sex life, etc. Throw people’s own fantasies and preferences on top of that and I think it keeps fans from actually seeing Harry and Louis as real people.

From my experience, there are much fewer men in this fandom than women, so it’s especially nice to hear a gay man’s perspective on all of this. Thank you so much for adding your thoughts to the conversation.

[twopoppies]

I just need to say this. It's crazy to me how little control H and L have and how little freedom. As a young queer kid in rural America, I always thought Hollywood and show business must be a haven for LGBT people. It was pretty crazy to realize how homophobic it still is.

I still live in a rural area of a conservative state (hopefully not for too much longer!). Today I got home and found some church had tucked brochures in my mailbox that among other things discussed women dressing femininely and homosexuality as a sin. I don't have much money in the bank.

All that, and I still feel like I have more freedom to present myself and say what I want and date who I want. Crazy considering they're literally millionaires and move in these metropolitan circles.

Anyway thank you for your blog I love it 💗 hope you are well!

Hi darling. I didn't see this until just now.

I'm sorry about those brochures. What a nasty reminder of some people's closed-mindedness. And, in a way, I'm sorry what's going on with Harry and Louis has burst your bubble about Hollywood. I do think, though, cities like Los Angeles and industries like Hollywood are more forgiving if you're not in front of the camera. There are so many queer people here who live very openly and very happily. But, if your value is based on how sexually desirable you are to the greatest number of people, well... you'd better at least look straight.

There's a lot that fucked up in this world. I hope when you leave the rural, conservative place you grew up in, you find a place where you can be fully yourself in every possible way. ❤️

[lesbian-vodka]

Hello anon, As someone who moved out of their rural conservative home a few years ago, to a very liberal city where I can finally be seen as normal, it is certainly liberating. I really hope you can make the move whenever it is. Rooting for you, and everyone like us! ❤️❤️❤️

[guccifloralsuits]

I genuinely think if you locked up the members of One Direction together in a studio until they completed an album with almost none of them on speaking terms they could make this century’s Rumors

[manofmoth]

i was compelled

[leeminholinoing]

Lesbian bar in Brussels (GoFundMe)

Hello, there is a project to create a lesbian bar in Brussels (which would bring the number of lesbian bars to two (2!) in the city). It is in the city centre and would be open in the afternoon not just at night. My grandma self would love to have it to go drink a coffee and read a book while being in a safe space.

They need funds to be able to open the place and have explained everything they need in order to open on their GoFundMe page.

It would mean the world if you could share this post and donate if you can.

Donate to Help Build a Lesbian Bar in the city center of Brussels!, organized by Castelain Emmy

Eng : ✨Help Us Build a Welcoming, Intersectional Feminist… Castelain Emmy needs your support for Help Build a Lesbian Bar in the city ce

[berrystainedsue]

Louis at Brighton during Lucid, when they were waving pride flags 🏳️‍🌈 x

[tbslhabit]

Louis on Dublin barricade in a blizzard of confetti

[twopoppies]

Hi Gina! I’ve been in the fandom for years — since 2013. I spent most of my time in the 1D fandom, but I’ve also been in other fandoms here and there. I wouldn’t say I’m chronically online, but I do keep up with pop culture.

Personally, I haven’t really seen in any other artist what I see with Harry, the PR relationships and how there are specific accounts or groups dedicated to exposing them, and they also seem to have some kind of negative agenda toward him.

And that makes me curious, because the music and film industries are full of PR relationships and closeted artists — some even more popular than Harry. But in those cases, you don’t really see these specific or mysterious accounts like uncle vizzy, those "pr twitter accounts" that sound shady and claim to work in the industry, or accounts like the pub account on IG, etc.

I know there are accounts on social media that focus on exposing the industry as a whole. For example, with Justin Bieber, there are plenty of accounts exposing Scooter Braun, his label, and even some that get a bit conspiratorial — but there’s still overall support for Justin. With Harry, though, I always feel like those kinds of accounts have something more personal against him (in addition to the people around him in his career). There’s a certain level of rejection toward him. A lot of them seem to believe he’s just another "manipulative, calculated person" in the industry.

And it’s an interesting contrast, because I wonder if it has to do with the fact that, outwardly, Harry comes across as someone very mentally well-adjusted, and a large part of the public ignores the closeting aspect. And even though we understand that he gives that impression because 1) he tends to internalize his emotions and expresses them mainly through his art, and 2) he’s stayed emotionally stable partly because he’s had access to psychotherapy, a lot of people ignore that and assume he’s completely unaffected.

And it’s harder to feel empathy or suspect someone is struggling when you don’t see “obvious signs” of it.

Sometimes I also wonder if the negativity toward Harry is just collateral damage from people’s dislike of the Azoffs, or maybe from not understanding — or not wanting to acknowledge — the closeting aspect.

I think it’s a combination of all of that.

Take Justin Bieber, for example. It really wasn’t until the Diddy trial exposed the abuse Justin likely suffered that the GP started having some sympathy for him. Outside of his core fanbase, most people only knew the headlines and just chalked him up to being another spoiled, self-destructive, drug-addicted mess who screwed up his career.

But once people could attach something to his behavior that they could feel sympathy for, the outpouring of support for him was everywhere.

I think unless you’re really paying close attention, Harry makes it seem as though he’s fine with his situation and that everything in his life comes easily and he’s on top of the world. So people feel a sense of jealousy, prefer to tear him down, spread hateful rumors about him, etc.

I think most people tend to assume all celebrities are just rich and entitled and don’t deserve any sympathy.

[28mindgames]

LTHQ: Lotto Arena, Antwerp Belgium 19.04.2026

[vodkaskys]

I really need to express how conflicting it is for me to see how Louis’ voice has been deteriorating over the past few years. Seeing how, during his first tour, he at least drank after the show (which was still bad), but now he drinks from the moment he gets on stage until he leaves. And how fans, just because they want an interaction with him, bring him alcohol (which is honestly pathetic and terrible). I understand wanting his attention, but continuing to encourage and support such a harmful habit like alcoholism is awful.

In one of his latest interviews, he said there were days he went on stage drunk, things he didn’t even remember. And that lines up with his obvious hungover attitude on stage, which happens more often than it should. What he does or doesn’t do is ultimately his responsibility—he’s an adult, and frankly, he doesn’t owe me anything. But it’s ridiculous how every time I criticize those behaviors or point out his unhealthy habits, I get attacked in the most absurd ways—insults, even death threats. And constantly being told that I “hate Louis.”

My issue with alcohol is personal. I’ve seen people’s lives destroyed because of it, and not only that, I’ve been affected by people under the influence who, in that state, aren’t aware of what they’re doing. It’s impossible not to form at least some level of a parasocial bond with your favorite artist—you consume them constantly, you perceive them all the time. Even if you don’t know them personally or live with them 24/7, you start noticing patterns and behaviors that the general public might not pick up on. And with that comes empathy, a sense of connection, and a desire to protect them and want them to be happy.

So all of this comes from that—from my own parasocial connection to Louis. I grew up with One Direction. I saw how alcohol affected Liam to the point where he seemed like a different person. And now I see how alcohol, smoking, and other habits are affecting Louis. At this point, it’s almost ironic—because the same fans who attack me for pointing these things out are the ones who, if Louis ever faces serious consequences from these habits, will be the first to cry endlessly about it.

It’s obvious we can’t force or demand anything from him—I’m not naive. But I do believe that as a fandom, and just as people with some common sense, we can choose not to romanticize any of this. For example: not bringing signs encouraging him to drink, not sharing or celebrating videos or photos of him drinking and smoking, and not acting like it’s “hot” or sexy to see him like that 😭✋🏻

[sunshineandlyrics]

✨🤲🏻✨ 12 April 2026

John Delf posted a Saint Louis card a fan had given him on his sound equipment with On Fire in the background, 14 April 2026 x

[sunshineandlyrics]

This would explain why her and her friends were able to have bottles of alcohol, unlike the rest of the fans. HDWGHWT Barcelona, 12 April 2026.

[twopoppies]

Look at Zara’s comment on this post from Zak and his answer. Kind of weird for him to say “Thanks for the warm welcome”, when he has been touring with Louis long before Z was in the picture. They make her sound like some kind of first lady that have to accept you on the crew 🙄

https://www.instagram.com/p/DXHhslECiYG/

Not defending Zara, but I think Zak is actually thanking her for being nice to his girlfriend who came to visit.

[voxina]

For me, it’s mainly the fact that he pointed the rainbow flag so explicitly whilst the whole venue was in darkness and it was the only thing lit up. There’s no way anyone could misinterpret that moment. Over the years, and even recently, many people try to claim that Louis is homophobic, that his concerts aren’t welcoming spaces for the LGBTQ+ community, and that you shouldn’t bring rainbow flags because it’s disrespectful to him and the other fans, or they diminish his support for his queer fans at every opportunity. Well, once again, Louis has shown them just how wrong they are. And he did it in the way he always has and we’ve come to expect: no grand gestures, no explicit speeches. Louis isn’t like that, and it would be unfair to expect anything else from him, projecting onto him what other artists do. Because they want to, certainly, but also because they’re in the personal and professional position to be able to do so. Perhaps one day he will, but Louis knows how to be loud in his own way. He always has been. And sadly for that reason, for some people, that should matter less, or even not at all. Yet here we are, faced with yet another undeniable piece of evidence of just how much he supports the community and how his shows are safe spaces for everyone.

[credit to ghostoflou91 on Twitter who managed to capture the exact moment]

[ificouldflymp3]

@freddiesmyqueen, Siri and I had a great time seeing Louis in Oslo today ❤️

[shanesbian]

x