too short to ride

⚢ftm/21/intersex⚢ learning to reclaim womanhood. i'm a butch lesbian trans man. i put female safety over male feelings. mobile links

[e-cryptid-deactivated20180601]

Not shaving and not wearing make up are literally nonbehaviors. They’re a complete lack of action. But doing nothing is considered masculine because men are the only ones who are allowed to just be.

[lesbianftm]

would any radfems be interested if i... held a moomin watch party.......

[vladtheunfollower]

labiaplasty should not exist I’m mad that doctors get paid to cut off parts of women and girls’ vulvas bc porn culture makes us feel they are wrong

[sangredesirena78463748-deactiva]

honestly the world would be a better place if women just fucking snapped lmao i’m so tired of women taking men’s shit and cowering and giving into their demands like. enough already

[sangredesirena78463748-deactiva]

the sooner you realize that men will hate you no matter how much you beg and grovel and apologize for taking up space in the world…. the sooner u will be free. go apeshit

[lesbianftm]

your experience with trans women is very limited. their fav colors are just as diverse as cis women's. i know more goth trans women than super girly ones, and black is way more predominant than pink.

even the goth trans women i know have the favorite color of pink.. :X

a good 80% of the people i interact with are trans women, i do NOT think my experience is very limited at all.

[detrans-thoughts]

Starting to get ready and excited for summer but my excitement for the joys of swimming is being tempered somewhat by the weird feelings I have about my chest post-mastectomy. I have no problem being naked in front of my partners or people I’m having sex with but, for some reason, swimwear is giving me all sorts of feels. I don’t hate my flat chest - but, I miss my breasts. They were so cute! I feel odd grief about their loss. 

I am just trying to remind myself that I don’t have to look like anyone else but me. And right now, this is how I look. 

If anyone has any similar feels/grief around their chest - please feel free to get in touch! 

[werevulvi]

I’m a detrans woman who’s post top surgery as well, and I grieve my chest a lot. I want to get back into swimming as well (indoors though), but that doesn’t seem to be possible for me to manage at this point. I tried it once and was just like “nope” about it all. So that will have to wait for me.

I don’t care what others think I “should” look like as a woman, like I’m not bothered by having facial hair, a deep voice, etc. But I feel different about my chest, and it doesn’t have anything to do with other people. Like something’s actually missing there and it hurts, mentally. Also when I’m alone, actually that’s when it’s the worst. I struggle with it in sexual situations, a lot.

I bought breast forms (silicone prosthetics) that I wear in mastectomy bras and that gives me a lot of comfort about my chest. I never want to take them off. I avoid looking at and touching my bare chest, except from when I wash and/or shave it.

It doesn’t look “bad” at all, so it’s not that. I just really miss having breasts and feel “wrong” without a pair. Cause like they used to be a part of me. I allow myself to mourn that loss, and look forward to getting breast reconstruction surgery.

[detrans-thoughts]

thank you so much for sharing. I’ve found it really hard to process grief in relation to my body in this way, so it’s really helpful to me to get to read about other people’s experiences. Re swimming - I’ve been thinking about getting waterproof/swimming breast forms - is that something you’ve looked into that might help with the swimming situation?

[needhelpacking99]

God. You selfish cunts. Do you have any idea how much I’d kill for Top Surgery? Instead you fucking idiots are sitting here complaining about having it. I hope you rot in hell

[detrans-thoughts]

@needhelpacking99 you’ve commented on like four posts on my blog saying some variation of the above and shitting on detransitioned people (mainly women) sharing our experiences. 

I’m choosing to respond to this post specifically to say just this: I spent years (aged 16 to 25) binding and wanting top surgery. I suffered through summers in some of the warmest parts of Australia. I would have killed for top surgery. I was happy with my chest for years. And yet - here I am, 5 years later, processing grief. 

I have no interest in being a cautionary tale or dissuading others from exercising autonomy over their bodies. There is very likely nothing that anyone could have said or done that would have changed any of my decisions around medical transition, and I doubt that me sharing my experiences and trying to find and build community with others, is going to alter anyone else’s decision. 

All I know is that when I woke in the middle of the night 3 years ago and realised that if I could go back I would choose differently, my immediate instinct was come on tumblr and search a bunch of tags looking for anyone who might be feeling the same. 

If you can read my OP as me simply ‘complaining’ you are a deeply unempathetic person and I am sorry that you are so angry. If you are in pain, I truly hope it passes. 

[hidetothink]

Gender is all fun and games until you’re actually a woman

[thyrell]

christ this is one of those posts that sounds like it could be a good take until you look at op’s blog

[hidetothink]

When you agree that women are oppressed but recoil at the idea of recognizing why they are

[destroyyourbinder]

I was suggested this video today on YouTube and wanted to share this person’s experience with everyone, even though I don’t usually share content made by male people. Roly is a gay YouTube personality from the UK who makes videos about LGBT issues and body modification, and formerly saw himself as genderfluid or nonbinary. Roly participated in educational videos and panels about nonbinary issues, and was deeply involved in online transgender circles. In this 20 minute video, he shares his experiences with how toxic the nonbinary community is and how holding this identity hurt him (although it does still appear he refers to himself as nonbinary and has not completely given up his affiliation with this term to name his experiences).  

I share this video because many women have had the same experience, but those who have spoken out have had their experiences publicly and extensively belittled and shamed, with common claims ranging from “it doesn’t happen”, to that their experiences do not matter because they were “faking their identity” all along, to being accused of being a “TERF” for noting very clear and public patterns of abuse. It can often be hard for female people to recognize their experiences in other women, given that women who speak are so abused and hated that even privately relating to their experiences can feel so extremely high stakes that we do not even want to risk having even hypothetical solidarity or similarity with them. So I share the experience of someone who is male, which mirrors what many female people I know have undergone and still experience.

Roly shares familiar experiences with manipulative male people who appear to be taking on a nonbinary identity for social credibility, being demeaned and ostracized for being homosexual and naming that he is gay alongside his gender identity, being unable to voice his disagreement with the politics of nonbinary community and individual members, the climate created by people questioning whether or not people would date or have sex with transgender people to validate trans people’s gender experiences, pervasive petty attacking behavior and cruelty from members of his own community and how this affected him while being attacked at the same time by right-wing trolls, and the pressure he felt to alter his presentation lest he be accused and harassed by other nonbinary people.

Please take special note of his demeanor and the way he speaks about his experience. A commenter notes that it sounds like he just left a cult. Roly is still clearly extremely agitated and confused about his time in the community and struggling to even find words for what happened nonetheless the right to be angry about it. It is startling to find this in someone male, especially about gender issues, because typically male people have far more societal entitlement to their right to speak and have been socialized to be (over)confident in their own viewpoint. I am disappointed he is only speaking for himself, and not for the many women who created room for him to speak through risking their safety and livelihoods in exposing the consequences of community behavior and transgender identity politics before him. I am still glad he is speaking out about his experience, however, even though his video is a sign that “gender” has gotten so bad that a even a male celebrity can end up traumatized, baffled, and afraid.

[lesbianftm]

hey realtalk but why is it that 90% of all the trans women i know all have the same favorite color? and it’s always pink?

most cis women i know all have very diverse favorite colors. i meet the same amount of women who like pink as women who like red, or blue, or yellow, or literally any other color.

but when i meet a trans women and i ask her favorite color (because i’m an artist and color is my absolute favorite thing in the world), 90% of the time i already know the answer. and the answer is pink.

i know a LOT of trans women. most of my friends are trans women. only 2 of them have favorite colors that aren’t pink.

it just leaves a weird taste in my mouth. like upholding gendered stereotypes and expectations on womanhood and pink=woman. but also i could be looking too into this.

thoughts?

[j0rrated]

i have NPC energy cause most of my replies consist on

ok

NICE

hell ye!

no…….

yes?

sdfghjhghjkjDFGHJKGHJJDFGSS

thank you so much!

fuck!

[j0rrated]

more reasons im a NPC:

if i stand still for too long i start doing idle animations 

will only talk to people if they start conversation first 

my walking speed is too fast to be walking and too slow to be running

if you talk to me too many times i start repeating dialogue

if you do a small favor for me i will follow you around without questions

i will drop a lot exposition if you ask

sometimes i get stuck on doors

you may stand in a straight line from me holding a corpse but its more than 10 meters so i will not notice

low HP

[purpletangyvaginas]

[grownsoftly]

I thought only I did this 😭

[ahighlyfunctioningfangirl]

I use my scarf to cover up me doing that at work 😂😂😂😂

[lesbianftm]

on my main i said i needed $60 to get a new tablet pen and that i would offer $10 mouse art commissions.

within an hour i got over $100.

i cannot ever come out as a radfem on main hgtfghj....

[stevienick]

Horror + animals.

[intersex-survey]

2019 Intersex Inclusion Survey

Hey everyone,

I’ve recently closed the original Intersex Inclusion Survey and I will now be opening the 2019 Intersex Inclusion Survey to the public.

As a reminder, this is a poll to gauge people’s reactions to the idea of the inclusion of intersex individuals in the LGBTQ+ community. You do not need to be intersex or LGBTQ+ to take this poll. The general findings of this survey are not intended to make absolute decisions about either community, but to simply to gather data.

This survey will ask about your opinions on intersex inclusion versus exclusion, as well as some other stances on other discourse areas. I do this because of personality curiosity as this is what the survey originated from. 

All answers are anonymous and cannot be tracked back to you. This survey will close 11:59pm on 12/31/2019 EST. All released data will be held on this blog.

While I would love to make a survey simply for intersex people, that’s not the intent for this survey though I may do that in the future if this gains traction. It’s easier for surveys such as this to gain traction when they are presented to larger groups of people, however don’t worry, I do have ways to limit my results to what intersex people want specifically.

Please share this survey, both on tumblr and off of tumblr.

2019 Survey

Results

Suggestions

[meatpower]

The desire to pick up any large sticks and carry them around for no reason

[meatpower]

amazing reply

[ihatetomblr-4-deactivated201911]

y'all are really missing out on this one

[vladtheunfollower]

[lesbian-lizards]

So, feminism basically.

[tehbewilderness]

3rd rule of misogyny: Women speaking for themselves are exclusionary and selfish.