lens of les

view the world through my eyes

[leslazy]

Peace out 2024 ✌🏼

[leslazy]

Friends in SC 🧡

[leslazy]

xoxo 🖤🤍

[leslazy]

bikes in december 🏍

[leslazy]

friendsmas in december 🎄

(shot by michael lol)

[leslazy]

cruising in october 🌴 🛳

[leslazy]

magic in August ✨️

[leslazy]

happy fourth

[leslazy]

friends

[leslazy]

22.02.2022 ♡

[leslazy]

My Funny Valentine

[leslazy]

Who do I envy? Why do I envy them?

I've been really hung up on fitness tiktok lately. I see women who looked like me reaching their goals and I'm afraid I'm always gonna stay stuck here at the halfway mark. I'm afraid I'll never reach that level of discipline, or if I do, I'll never get the results I desire because of forces greater than my efforts, like my imbalanced hormones. But I know I can't let this get me down and little progress builds up into the big progress I desire.

[leslazy]

What have I been sensitive to lately?

Touch. I've been very touchy feely with my loved ones and I've been very aware of the ways others give me physical touch. I really do get a lot of energy from those little caresses and kisses.

[leslazy]

What am I wearing when I have the best time? What do I always regret wearing?

I have to wear something I can dance in, so typically not jeans, but can be pants & something on top that my boobies are secure. Shoes gotta be comfy so something like sneakers or boots or wedges. I really gotta be ✨️ feeling myself ✨️ so hair is freshly done by my queen Johanny + my wings are so perfect and sharp.

I always regret wearing an uncomfy top i.e. something that are in danger of a nip slip. I also regret wearing anything that was worn to cover up insecurities. Days like that are days that I really should've stayed home but decided to go out because I said I would but I'm no longer in the mood. My clothes is very indicative of how I'm feeling inside my head.

[leslazy]

Who do I feel most myself around? Why?

I think it's a little crazy to have this answer after such a short period of time, but Michael. I love my friends. I love my family. My co-workers (old and new) are cool. But I still curate different parts of me based on who I'm with - except when I'm with Michael. In fact, he allows me to really spread my wings and indulge in the little things I really enjoy, like photography and music for example, with zero judgement. I know more about my likes, dislikes, vices and virtues every time I hang out with Michael. And I think that's a beautiful thing and something I didn't realize is key in a relationship.

[leslazy]

What's my most toxic trait I can admit to? Where do I think it stems from?

This is kinda hard to put into words because I'm not sure how to clearly define it, but the fact that whatever I want I'm gonna get, some way somehow. When I don't, I get upset, although I have become much better over the years with taking things on the chin and rolling with the punches. "Not taking no for an answer." I believe this stems from childhood in the sense that my parents definitely raised me in a "because I said so" household. One thing I've learned working with kids is that they deserve respect and to be listened to. It's not always tantrums. Find out why they don't want to do something. Maybe find a compromise. Ultimately if it's something non-negotiable like going to the dentist, that's where you coach them through it and ease their fears... I never got that either.

Honestly I didn't realize this was my toxic trait until I reflected on last night and realized I used to be just as persistent in my past relationships and my friendships. People have just adapted by giving me hard stops, but I need to start checking myself too.

[leslazy]

Bad & Boo-zy

Halloween '21