Lessons Stories Teach Us

There are many messages in the stories that we have heard and/or we have read. These stories may tickle our funny bone also contain some useful messages for us. This blog is a collection of such stories and the lessons they teach us

[lessonsbystories]

The Art of Silence

“God is silent. Now if only man would shut up.” - Woody Allen

Once upon a time four monks decided to meditate silently without speaking for two weeks. To begin their quest they sought after a place and zeroed on a cave. The day came for them to begin their meditation quest. They gathered at the meeting place, greeted each other, said a prayer to God and went into the cave

They began with enthusiasm and no one said a word the whole day. They placed a candle at the centre of the place. By nightfall of the first day, the candle began to flicker and then went out.

The first monk blurted out, "Oh, no! The candle is out."

The second monk said, "Hey! We are not supposed to speak!"

The third monk said in an irritated voice, "What is this? Why did you two break the silence?"

The fourth monk smiled and said, "Wow! I'm the only one who hasn't spoken."

So what happened here

Each monk broke their silence and for a different reasons of their own. Similar to the 4 monks we all have a stumbling block in our quest of inner journey - Distraction, Judgement, Anger and Pride.

So what happened with the monks

The first monk got distracted and forgot what was more important - the practice of witnessing without reacting.

The second monk was more worried about others following the rules than in actually practicing himself. He was quick to judge without noticing that he himself was guilty of what he was criticizing.

The third monk let his anger towards the first two monks affect him. The singular burst of anger ruined the effort of the day.

The fourth monk lost his way because of pride. He was convinced he was superior to the others, proving his ignorance.

Why did the four monks speak at all? They could have simply maintained their silence and would have been successful in their quest.

The first, second and third monks could have stayed silent and stopped the domino effect of the other monks breaking their silence.

What about the fourth monk? If he had stayed silent, would the other three might have continued to argue and not even noticed his silence OR could have observed him and gone back to meditating, influenced by him.

"It is the province of KNOWLEDGE to SPEAK; it is the privilege of WISDOM to LISTEN."

As we learn to truly listen, witness and observe without impulsively reacting with distraction, judgement, anger and pride,

[lessonsbystories]

Oblivious Followers: Being Foolish?

Bruce Lee once said - “A wise man can learn more from a foolish question than a fool can learn from a wise answer”. 

Akbar-Birbal stories are very common in our country. They are all about wits, wisdom, intelligence and have a logical sense to it. Some even extended to tell us how some social practices were so incorrect that their mere existence was wrong. However, nobody knows if these stories were created with them as the main characters or were, they real. 

As usual Akbar’s court was in process. On his way to the court room that morning, he had heard someone calling one a fool. The word “fool” kept echoing in his mind. He needed a clear head and had to get this thought out of his mind before attending to the daily kingdom activities. He made a mental note of putting it first on the agenda that morning. When all his courtiers were present, he asked the question to all – “What is being foolish?”. As soon he asked the question there was a hubbub in the court. Akbar gave a sigh of relief for having his mind cleared as somebody would answer and he would be able to clear his mind and he would happily to return to his activities.

Many put forward their thoughts on foolishness and being a fool. Birbal, however was the one who noticed the change in Akbar’s face as he asked the question. It was not a challenge nor the king was being inquisitive. The answers he was getting from his courtiers were not satisfactory, that which convinced his troubled mind.

Birbal then volunteered to answer the question, however asked for 4 days of time. Akbar mind was more at relaxed state now, as Birbal, one of his trusted was willingly ready to take up the question and find an answer for him. Akbar knew that Birbal would help him with it all the troubles of his mind would be laid to rest.

Birbal then proceeded to a well-known cobbler in the town. There he made a specific order for a pair of shoes – 1 ft in length and Half feet in width. The shoes were to be studded with gems and diamonds. Price was not a problem, but the shoes was to be made with older leather and not a fresh one. The order was unique, as none would place such an order unless one was ordering it for a giant. However, he could not refuse a VIP such as Birbal and accepted the order. The order was delivered in 2 days according to the specifications. Birbal while accepting the order paid the cobbler an extra sum of money, while telling him 2 things one to keep his mouth shut about the order and other to keep his eyes and ears open as he will learn an important lesson in life from this special order.

Birbal had to meet the Maulvi of the local mosque the next day. On the pretext of meeting him, he took with him one of the gem studded shoes. While returning he left one near the mosque.

The next day, the maulvi saw the gem studded shoe. He was stunned by the presence of a single shoe. However, what caught his attention was the sheer size of the shoes. It was not a size that could fit any ordinary man or woman. And that it was studded with gems was what really caught the attention. He proclaimed that the shoe belonged to God. Probably during the visit to the mosque god had left in hurry and left one of his shoes back. He proclaimed that this was divine intervention. News spread like wildfire. People started worshipping the shoes like crazy. It was kept in a special place. Even Akbar visited and paid his respect.  

In the meanwhile, the 4 days of time requested by Birbal was also over and he duly returned, but with a sad face. On seeing him Akbar asked him the reason for his sadness. Birbal replied that there was an item stolen from him and it was his grandfather’s favourite shoes which before passing away he had given it to Birbal.  

Akbar was now furious that there was a theft and that from one of his favourites. He wanted a full investigation into the matter. Birbal, however, intervened and mentioned that only one shoe was stolen and the other was still in his possession. Having said he took out the shoe from his bag and showed it to Akbar.

It was Akbar who was stunned on seeing the shoes. He remembered seeing the shoes at the mosque and praying to it. It was called a divine intervention. However now he was surprised. Taking pity on his king, Birbal told him the story behind the shoe. Then told him this is the answer to his question on being foolish, that which was troubling him 4 days back. Akbar had no choice but to give full credit to Birbal

If this is true story then, the situation isn’t different now. Such instances of blind followers still exist. A leader may say or proclaim a thing and the blind followers will readily accept them, without knowing the facts or any other perspective of it or even if the information was manufactured. Till we have such ignorance among us in the world seldom shall we progress and prosper. 

[lessonsbystories]

The Paradox

This story dates back to many years back. This is part of ancient Greek history. Long, long ago, there was a Law teacher by the name of Euathlus. During the course of his many years of teaching he came across a student, Protagoras, who was willing to learn but was unable to pay the fees. However, the student was not allowing the teacher to teach without charging him. So, the student struck a deal with the teacher saying, "I will pay your fee the day I win my first case in the court".

Euathlus agreed and proceeded with the law course. When the course was finished and teacher started pestering the student to pay up the fee, the student reminded him of the deal and pushed days.Fed up with this, the teacher decided to sue the student in the court of law and both of them decided to argue for themselves.

The teacher put forward his argument saying and the student countered

 What comes now is what explains paradox is. For simplicity let us break this into 2 scenarios  

The teachers Paradox 

Scenario 1 - Euathlus wins and Protagoras loses - The teacher Euathlus wins the case then as per the law, Protagoras would be bound to pay him as the case is about his non-payment of dues.

Scenario 2 - Euathlus loses and Protagoras wins - The teacher Euathlus loses the case, Protagoras will still have to pay Euathlus because he would have won his first case as per the original agreement

So, either way Euathlus will get the money

Equally brilliant, the student had a counter paradox

Scenario 1 - Protagoras wins and Euathlus loses – If the student Protagoras wins the case then; as per law, he is not bound to pay anything to Euathlus, as the case is about non-payment of dues.

Scenario 2 - Protagoras loses and Euathlus wins – If Protagoras loses the case then; he will not have to pay Euathlus because hasn’t won his first case as per the original agreement

So, either way, Protagoras will not pay.

This is one of the greatest paradoxes ever recorded. Who is right and who is the winner still remains as a question. 

This case was not solved. The most interesting part is, it is still debated (even today) and remains unsolved. The question still remains, which of the two men is right?  

 The Paradox of the Court, also known as the counter dilemma of Euathlus or Protagoras' paradox 

Life sometimes puts us in a path where you have to be the judge of decisions where such paradoxes. What do you do? That’s the mystery question which nobody has been able to hit it right.

[lessonsbystories]

Selfless

“It's not about finding relevance or perfection or imperfection in objects, but it's that you can accept yourself and then go out and accept others” - Jeff Koons

Ramayana is one of the holy epics of India along with Mahabharata, Vedas, Upanishad, etc. Valmiki, is credited as the author for this epic, that describes the 7th incarnation or avatar of Lord Vishnu. It details his life, the morals and values he lived by, the camaraderie among brothers (though they were step brothers), his love for his wife Sita and the war he fought with Ravana who kidnapped Sita. The Ramayana written by Valmiki is commonly known as "Valmiki Ramayana". 

An untold or later developed story goes this way - it was at the time when Valmiki completed his work on the Ramayana. He wanted it to be reviewed. Narada, happened to be visiting Valmiki about the same time. A thought struck him, why not ask Narada to review his work. If he puts in a good review, word would get out soon after all Narada also does travel everywhere and word of mouth spreads faster than wildfire. 

Narada read it and read it again however, wasn’t clearly impressed. He remarked, ``It is good, but Hanuman’s is better’. Hearing this Valmiki was stunned and exclaimed “Hanuman has written the Ramayana too!' 

A clearly surprised Valmiki didn’t like this as he assumed to be the sole author of Ramayana. He began to wonder whose Ramayana was better. He was determined to find out whose work was the better of the two. He was also worried that his Ramayana will not become a bestseller. So, he set out to find Hanuman.

Valimiki tracked Hanuman to a grove of plantains having a nice time. Hanuman’s nice time was nothing but being immersed in the thought of his lord Ram. They introduced themselves, got acquainted. Sensing some concern that showed on Valmiki’s face Hanuman enquired about it. Valmiki clearly mentioned his intention of visit. Hanuman was more than willing to show his work. Valmiki started to read Hanuman’s Ramayana. It was written on banana leaves. He read it, read it again and again. Captured by the beauty of what he had just read, he recalled Narada’s words - “Hanuman’s is better”.

It was perfectly written. There was the most exquisite choice of grammar and vocabulary, meter and melody. After all Hanuman was a witness to a majority of the events of the Ramayana from the time he met Ram and Lakshmana in the forest. He was part of the war and rescue. Tears of joy, formed in Valmiki's eyes of reading such a work which was so great, showed Hanuman's pure devotion to his lord.  

On seeing Valmiki's state, a concerned Hanuman immediately asked him, ``Is it so bad? Or I have missed something?”. To which Valmiki replied, 'No, it is too perfect. I now understood why Narada mentioned your work was better than mine and that nobody will read my Ramayana’. Valmiki's words came from his heart. Hearing this Hanuman without thinking twice, simply tore up his version of the Ramayana and effortlessly said “ Now no one will ever read Hanuman’s Ramayana.” Valmiki stood dumbstruck and said “What have you done?” It was the most beautiful work and the best we ever would get to see?” A shocked Valmiki asked, requested and begged Hanuman to revive the work, Hanuman just destroyed. He just could not move the mountain. 

Hanuman only had to say, 'You need your Ramayana more than I need mine. You wrote your Ramayana so that the world remembers Valmiki; I wrote my Ramayana so that I remember my Ram. The work, love and affection of my Ram’s devotees to him are more important to me than my Ramayana”.

At that moment Valmiki realized how he had been consumed by the desire. He wanted name and fame through his work. He had not used his work to liberate himself from the fear of invalidation. He had not appreciated the essence of Ram’s tale to unknot his mind from being selfish. While Hanuman on the other hand had the invaluable power of sacrifice and renunciation. He was selfless in giving up his work for Valmiki without second thought. 

Valmiki’s realized his was a product of ambition; but Hanuman’s Ramayana was a product of affection. Valmiki wanted it to be Valmiki’s Ramayana, however Hanuman’s work was all about Rama and not Hanuman's Ramayana. That’s why Hanuman’s Ramayana sounded so much better. Valmiki realized it the moment he read it and Hanuman’s actions affirmed that "Greater than Ram…is the name of Ram"

Even when there are imperfections within us, we think to be superior until the time may come where we meet a more superior force. Noteworthy that there are people like Hanuman who don’t want to be famous. They just do their jobs and fulfill their purpose. 

Who do we want to be? Which areas of your life are you seeking validation? Who are you seeking validation from? Are trying to be bogged down by some selfish work and not trying to look at what more superior work others do? 

Never assume you are perfect like Valmiki, thinking your ’'Ramayana” is the best, as there are many unsung people like Hanuman. 

Disclaimer: The above work is a purely fictitious story and resembles nothing to hurt, invalidate the sentiments of any kind of people. To be read as a moral giving story only. 

[lessonsbystories]

Twist in the Tale

a

No one is so brave that he is not disturbed by something unexpected - Julius Ceaser

There is saying in in India which goes this way “Bhagawan jab bhi deta hai chappar phaad ke deta hai” - Translates to whenever god decides to bless you with everything, it just blows the roof over” . You cannot be waiting for that Uno moment. Though it is said “Fortune favours the bold, however when lady luck smiles at you, that is something you cannot ignore”. This story is in this context about 2 friends in Mumbai, India.

John Fernandez lived in Dadar decided to go fishing in Goa.  He decided to have his buddy Chris Fernandez from Vasai tag along with him. Chris readily accepted. So they loaded up John's minivan and headed to Goa.

En route..after driving for few hours, they got caught in a terrible bad weather in a remote hamlet at Ratnagiri. So they pulled into a nearby farm. The door was answered by an attractive lady. The friends asked her if they could spend the night there as it was impossible to drive. 

The lady was compassionate and politely said 'I realize it's terrible weather out there and I have this huge house all to myself. But I'm recently widowed and a single widow, she explained, I'm afraid the neighbours will talk ill if I let you stay in my house.'

'Don't worry,' John said. 'We'll be happy to sleep in the servants quarters if available. And if the weather breaks, we'll be gone at first light.'  The lady agreed, and the two men found boarding in the servants quarters and settled in for the night. Next morning as usual, the weather had cleared, and both friends got on their way to Goa. They enjoyed a great weekend of fishing in Goa.

About nine months later, John got an unexpected letter from an attorney. It took him a few minutes to figure it out, but he finally determined that it was from the attorney of that attractive widow he had met on the fishing weekend, where they spent the night. How could he forget such a pretty face? After accepting the offer from the attorney, he dropped in on his friend Chris and asked, "Chris, do you remember that good-looking widow from the farm we stayed at on our fishing holiday in Ratnagiri about 9 months ago?"

'Yes, I do,' said Chris.

'Did you, err, I mean did you happen to get up in the middle of the night, go up to the house and pay her a visit while I slept?’

'Well, um, yes!,' said Chris with a little embarrassment about being found out, 'I have to admit that I did.'

'And did you happen to give her my name instead of telling her your name?' asked John

Chris's face turned beet red and he said, 'Yeah, look, I'm sorry, buddy. I'm afraid I did.' 'Why do you ask?'

That was the best thing you could have done for me said John, He could see a big question on Chris’s face.

He broke the excitement and said, 'She just died and left 9 Crore property for me!! I just finished signing the papers and thought of letting you know”  

[lessonsbystories]

“Its all about the money???“

Know where you’re going in life, you may already be there! Many times in life, money is not everything. 

                                                                                                           - Unknown

A boat docked in a tiny village. A tourist complimented the local fisherman on the quality of their fish and asked how long it took to catch them. Not very long, answered the fisherman.

With immediate business instincts the tourists asked -”Why didn’t you stay out longer and catch more?”The fisherman explained that their small catches were sufficient to meet their needs and those of the families.

“But what do you do with the rest of your time?”

“We sleep late,  fish a little, play with our children and take siesta with our wives. In the evening, we go into the village to see our friends, have a few drinks, play the guitar and sing a few songs. We have a full life.”

The tourist had an MBA from Harvard interrupted. You should start by fishing longer every day. You can then sell the extra fish you catch. With that extra revenue, you can buy a bigger boat.” With that extra money buy second and third until you have an entire fleet of trawlers. Instead selling fish to middlemen, negotiate directly with processing plants or may be open your own plant. And move to bigger city.

How long would that take ?

Twenty, perhaps twenty-five years.” replied the tourist.

And after that?”

When your business gets really big, you can start buying and selling stocks for millions!!

Millions? Really ? and after that ? asked the fisherman.

“After that retire , live in a tiny village near the coast, sleep late, play with your children, spend your evening drinking and enjoying with your friends.”

“With all due respect sir, but that's exactly what we are doing now. So, whats the point wasting twenty-five years ?

So whats the point as there’s More to Life Than Money

[lessonsbystories]

The Crack Pot

“Relish everything that's inside of you, the imperfections, the darkness, the richness and light and everything. And that makes for a full life”

                                                                                            - Anthony Hopkins

This is an Old Chinese Story

An elderly woman, had a small café at a hill top. She had two large pots, which she used to fetch water for the cafe, every day from the river, with each hung on the ends of a pole. One of the pots had a crack in it while the other pot was perfect. At the end of the long walks everyday from the stream to the house, the cracked pot arrived only half full whilst the perfect pot had always delivered a full portion of water.

This went on for a very long time and daily, with the woman bringing home only one and a half pots of water. Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it could only do half of what it had been made to do. After two years of what it perceived to be bitter failure, it spoke to the woman one day by the stream.

The cracked pot said “Dear lady, I am ashamed of myself, because this crack in my side, causes water to leak out all the way back to your house and I am only able to deliver half pot of water only”. The old woman smiled and sweetly sat by the river and spoke to the pot. “I run a small cafe at the hill top. There cannot be many people who come here. Did you notice that there are flowers on your side of the path, but not on the other pot's side? People only get attracted by these beautiful flowers and come to my café. This has helped me grow my business.

Do you know how these flowers grew up?” I have always known about your flaw, so I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back, you water them and for a long time and helped them grow. I have been able to get good business only because of these beautiful flowers” Without you being just the way you are, there would not be this beauty to grace the café. Each of us has our own unique flaw. But it's the cracks and flaws we each have that make our lives together so very interesting and rewarding. If everything was perfect there wouldn’t have been a phrase called “scope for improvement.” You've just got to take each person for what they are and look for the good in them. To all of my crack(ed) 😊 pot friends, have a great day and remember to smell the flowers on your side of the path!

[lessonsbystories]

Disciplinary Action

We don’t have to be smarter than the rest, we have to be more disciplined than the rest 

                                                                                    -Warren Buffet

This post is about what happened in a typical father-son relation. There lived a family, where the father always kept a tab on his son’s doing. He would always remind him of responsibilities, which made the son dislike his father.He would often say “You are leaving the room without switching off the fan”; “The TV on in the room where there is no one. Switch it off!”; “Keep the pen in the stand; it is falling down”

The son didn’t like his father nagging him for these minor things. He always felt he had to tolerate these things till he was dependent on his father OR till he was able to take control of his life.

The same continued till a long time till his studies completed. A day came, when he received an invitation for a job interview. The first reaction that crossed his mind were “As soon as I get the job, I would leave this town. There won’t be any nagging from my father anymore.” 

It was an important day, which was to be a turning point in his life. He left for the interview all set for a new beginning. On this big day his father gave his 2 cents - “Answer the questions put to you without any hesitation. Even if you don’t know the answer, mention that confidently.” To his surprise, his father gave him more money than he actually needed to attend the interview and gave his blessings. 

The son reached the interview center. The interview center was a total surprise. It was more than unusual for a work place. On reaching the place of interview, the son was taken back. The first thing he noticed was - there was no security at the gate. Though the door was open, the latch was protruding out and probably would have also hit a lot of people passing through the door. Noticing this he immediately put the latch properly, closed the door and entered the office.

He passed by the garden and on both sides of the pathway he could see beautiful flower plants. The gardener had kept the water running in the hose-pipe and was not to be seen anywhere. There was a lot of water wastage and spilling over the pathway. He kept the hosepipe near the plant and turned off the tap.

He reached the reception area and there was none. However, there was a notice saying that the interview was in the first floor. He slowly climbed the stairs. He noticed, the light that was switched on last night was still burning at 10 am in the morning. Strangely he remembered his father’s admonition, “Why are you leaving the room without switching off the light?” and though he felt irritated by that, he sought the switch and turned off the light.

On reaching upstairs, he reached a large hall, where he saw many aspirants sitting, waiting for their turn. He looked at the number of people and wondered if he had any chance of getting the job. He entered the hall with some trepidation and stepped on the “Welcome” doormat placed near the door. He noticed that the mat was upside down. He straightened out the mat with some irritation and his fathers words ringing back in his thoughts.

He saw that in a few rows in the front there were many people waiting for their turn, whereas the back rows were empty, but a number of fans were running over those rows of seats. The voice his father echoed again, “Why are the fans running in the room where there is no one?” His instincts led him to switch off the fans that were not needed and sat at one of the empty chairs.

He could see many men entering the interview room and immediately leave from another door. There was thus no way anyone could guess what was being asked in the interview.  Then it was his turn, for the interview. He went and stood before the interviewer without any clue. The officer took the certificates from him and without looking at them asked, “When can you join work?”

Thoughts lingered in his mind, “is this a trick question being asked as part of the interview?” He was confused. “What are you thinking?” asked the boss. “We didn’t ask anyone any question here. By asking a few questions we won’t be able to assess the skills of anyone. So, our test was also to assess the attitude of the person we would hire. We kept certain tests based on the behaviour of the candidates and we observed everyone through CCTV. No one who came today did anything to put the latch properly, to stop water from the hose pipe, to set right the mat right, switch off the uselessly running fans or lights. You were the only one who did that. That’s why we have decided to select you for the job”, said the boss.

The boy who always used to get irritated at his father’s discipline and remonstrations,now realized that it is only the discipline inculcated in him that has got him his job. His irritation and anger at his father vanished completely and he found a new respect for him and his values. 

A rock doesn’t become a beautiful sculpture if it resists the pain of the chisel chipping it away. For us to become a beautiful sculpture and a human being we need to chisel out the bad habits and behaviour from ourselves. Those are the values of inculcating discipline in us.

[lessonsbystories]

Whats your style?

People ask the difference between a leader and a boss. The leader leads, and the boss drives - Theodore Roosevelt

What’s your managerial style? A lot have been written, said and depicted about Managers Versus Leaders. Leaders create visions, people focused, risk seeker, sets directions, pulls the team along. A manager on the other hand controls, likes to be respected, authoritative, gives directions, pushes the team and lots more

Good for some real management studies and are true to certain areas. Nevertheless, I too have experienced the both kinds of people. Managers who have been like the previously described Leaders and then there were those who wanted to keep everyone under their thumb.

However take a step back. Let us take real close look at things with some different perspective; there are these times where we need be the super encouraging person and where we need to act like a dictator. There are no prescribed guidelines or definitions or description for this. Having been a person who has managed from a small to a large team, I have definitely observed both these characteristics evolving out from me.  These are the need of the hour factored by the people who you are managing, strategy, nature of work and lot many things

So how is the managerial style…boss them or smooth talk them. Let us take cue from our 2 inspiring personalities – Lord Rama and Lord Krishna. Yes its true, when in need look up to your gods they will show you the path.

In Hindu mythology there are two great epics. One is called Ramayana and other is called Mahabharata. The center story of both these books is around victory of good on evil. In one story Lord Ram leads his army to defeat Ravana, in his land, while in the second Lord Krishna oversees Pandavas defeating the Kauravas in the war at Kurushektra. 

For those who do not know, Rama and Krishna are the incarnations of the same Lord Vishnu. First take Rama. In Ramayana – Ravana kidnaps Sita, Lord Rama’s wife. In his quest to get his wife back, he seeks the help of Sugreeva and his army. Sugreeva entrusts himself and his entire army to help Rama. Now Sugreeva and his army are the vanara army or the monkey army. Here brings the need of the hour. Rama’s army is used to a type of warfare using their fists, raw strength. On the other hand, their enemy they would face in the upcoming war, is more sophisticated –has the knowledge of using weapons, have capable leaders such as Indrajit, Kumbhakarna and Ravana, who are experienced in different styles of warfare and are the best of the class. Citing the circumstances and being the best warrior of his side, Rama has to take up the reigns of leading from the front.  He has to strategize the operations such as getting to Lanka by building a bridge, direct different people to do things which will meet the objectives. His army is happy to follow orders, as they are getting the required directions where their leader is setting directions to achieve their goals. Ultimately they won the war & the final desired outcome was achieved.

On the other hand let us take some look at the Mahabharata. Lord Krishna was the puppeteer of the whole war. He was very clear in his objectives. Where both the warring sides were his cousins, Krishna offered only his expertise with the condition that he won’t pick any weapon or fight the battle. The only offer from Krishna was to become a charioteer, which was accepted by Arjuna. And Krishna did what he said. He never picked up the weapon & he never fought the war. He only guided them wherever and whenever required. The Pandavas won the war, needless to say with the brilliance of Krishna and by following his advice the final outcome was achieved. So, what was different? Was it their managerial style OR was it the type of people who were being lead OR was it skill set they had. While Lord Ram’s role was to show it & lead from the front, Krishna played the role of a coach whose job was to remove cobwebs from his protege's mind. Rama had to teach and lead, Krishna couldn't teach, but definitely helped see things differently. One worked with the unskilled army had to be emotional, give precise instructions, and motivate the army; while the latter worked with trained and skilled professionals, only had to provide strategy.

 Now take a look at your team/family & reflect what type of leader/parent you are and may be what type you want to be. The one who keeps answering/solving problems for people/kids OR Who asks relevant questions from their people/kids so that they can find their own solution. Someone who tells/directs all the time OR the one who clarifies doubts & allows their people/kids to find their own ways.

There are Arjuna’s who have the necessary knowledge but they need someone to clarify the cobwebs in their mind, if you are to apply Lord Ram’s style on them, you are bound to fail them as a manager. On the other hand if there are people who aren't skilled enough but rely on your lead and expertise to sail, instructions won’t help and that’s where you have to be the boss  

Time for us to get starting to think and reflect what managerial style will bring the best result for you and your team/family? Is it Lord Ram or Lord Krishna? Is it the Managing Leader or the Coaching Leader!

[lessonsbystories]

Simple Little Things

“Common Sense is not Common”

Some years ago, there was a think tank convention organized by an international organization for people who have an IQ of 140 or higher. The members went out for lunch at a local cafe. When they sat down, one of them discovered that their salt shaker contained pepper, and their pepper shaker was full of salt.

How could they swap the contents of the two bottles without spilling any, and using only the implements at hand? Clearly this was a problem put forth in front of them...this was a job for think thank minds. The group debated the problem and presented ideas and finally, came up with a brilliant solution involving a napkin, a straw, and an empty saucer. They then called the waitress over, ready to dazzle her with their solution. "Ma'am," they said, "we couldn't help but notice that the pepper shaker contains salt and the salt shaker contains pepper..." But before they could finish, the waitress interrupted & said... "Oh -- sorry about that." She leaned over the table, unscrewed the caps of both bottles and interchanged  them. There was dead silence at the thinkers table. Moral of the story: Many times, there are simple solutions to the problems around us but it is our “brilliant” minds that complicate!

Look at life..... it's very simple.

[lessonsbystories]

Soar over the Rust

"You don't die if you fall in water, you die only if you don't swim  - Unknown

Ducks Quack, Eagles Soar 

Raman was waiting in the line for a ride at the airport. When a cab pulled up, the first thing he noticed was that the taxi was polished to a bright shine. Smartly dressed in a white shirt, black tie, and freshly pressed black slacks, the cab driver jumped out and rounded the car to open the back passenger door for Raman He handed Raman a laminated card and said: 'I'm your driver. While I'm loading your bags in the trunk I'd like you to read my mission statement.' Taken aback, I read the card. It was indeed his Mission Statement: To get my customers to their destination in the quickest, safest and cheapest way possible in a friendly environment. This blew Raman away. Especially when I noticed that the inside of the cab matched the outside. Spotlessly clean! As he slid behind the wheel, he asked, 'Would you like a cup of coffee? I have a thermos of regular and one of decaf.' Raman said jokingly, 'No, I'd prefer a soft drink.' The driver smiled and said, 'No problem. I have a cooler up front with regular and Diet Coke, lassi, water and orange juice.' Almost stuttering, Raman said, 'I'll take a Lassi.' Handing the drink, the driver said, 'If you'd like something to read, I have The Hindu, Times  of India, ET and India Today.' As they were pulling away, the cabbie handed another laminated card, 'These are the stations I get and the music they play, if you'd like to listen to the radio.' And as if that weren't enough, he told me that he had the air conditioning on and asked if the temperature was comfortable for him. Then he advised Raman of the best route to his destination for that time of day. He also let him know that he'd be happy to chat and tell him about some of the sights or, if preferred, to leave me with his own thoughts. on the contrary Raman struck a conversation with the cabbie, who was now introduced well. 'Tell me, Wasu,' I was amazed and asked him, 'have you always served customers like this?' Wasu smiled into the rear view mirror. 'No, not always. In fact, it's only been in the last two years. My first five years driving, I  spent most of my time complaining like all the rest of the cabbies do. Then I heard about power of choice one day.' 'Power of choice is that you can be a duck or an eagle.' 'If you get up in the morning expecting to have a bad day, you'll rarely disappoint yourself. Stop complaining!' 'Don't be a duck. Be an eagle. Ducks quack and complain. Eagles soar above the crowd.' 'That hit me right,' said Wasu. 'It is about me. I was always quacking and complaining, so I decided to change my attitude and become an eagle. I looked around at the other cabs and their drivers. The cabs were dirty, the drivers were unfriendly, and the customers were unhappy. So I decided to make some changes. I put in a few at a time. When my customers responded well, I did more.' 'I take it that has paid off for you,' I said. 'It sure has,' Wasu replied. 'My first year as an eagle, I doubled my income from the previous year. This year I'll probably quadruple it. My customers call me for appointments on my cell phone or leave a message on it.' Wasu made a different choice. He decided to stop quacking like ducks and start soaring like eagles. Have an eagle week..next week... And next...And....

[lessonsbystories]

INSTEAD OF yourself

The lord is everybody's friend, but friendly to the surrendered souls - Sri Bhagavatam

One day Krishna & Arjuna were taking their usual walk, when they came across an old Brahman begging, taking pity on his condition, Arjuna gave him a bag of gold coins. The man was overjoyed. On his way to home, he was robbed by a thief in the forest. He cursed his fate and the next day set off to beg again. Arjuna & Krishna saw him again & got to know his story. Arjuna once again took pity and gave him a large diamond. The man took it home and kept it in an old pot which had been unused for many years in order to keep it safe and went to sleep. The next morning before he could wake up, his wife went to fetch water from the river & on her way back, she slipped and her pot broke. She immediately remembered the pot at home which lay unused and brought it to fill it with water. Just as she dipped the pot in to the river the diamond escaped the pot and went in to the river. When she returned home the Brahman was desperately searching the house for the pot & when he saw it in his wife's hands, he got to know what had happened. Dejected with what had happened, he once again left to go begging. Once again Arjuna and Krishna saw him and when Arjuna heard of the unfortunate incident that had happened, he told Krishna , " I don't think this man is destined to be blessed at all, I don’t think I can help him anymore". Krishna then gave the man two pennies and the man took them and walked away. Arjuna then asked Krishna," My Lord, if gold coins and diamond could not change his condition, what good can two pennies do to him?". Krishna smiled and replied, "let us see". As the man walked home he was cursing his fate when he saw a fish that had just been caught by a fisherman and was struggling for its life, he took pity on it and thought to himself, " these two pennies cannot fetch me food anyway, let me at least save the life of this creature" and he purchased the fish and was about to throw it in the river when he saw that the breathlessness of the fish was caused due to some large obstruction in its mouth and when removed it , it was the very diamond he had lost in the river. He was overjoyed and started shouting "Look what I found! Look what I found". At this very time the thief that had robbed him in the forest was passing by and heard his shouts, he recognized the man and thought that man too recognized him and was thus shouting. Fearing that the Brahmin may take him to be executed, he rushed to him and begged for his forgiveness and returned all the gold coins he had stolen from him. The Brahmin was happy and walked away joyfully with all his wealth. He went straight to Arjuna to narrate the turn of events and thanked him for all his help and went away. Arjuna then asked Krishna, "My Lord, how is it that my gold and diamond could not help him but your meager two pennies did?. Krishna replied," when he had the gold and diamonds he was only thinking of himself and his needs, but when he had the two pennies he put the needs of another creature before his and so I took care of his needs. The truth is Arjuna, when you think of the pain and needs of others and work to help them, you are doing God's work and hence God Himself takes care of you".

[lessonsbystories]

Comfort Level

As you move outside of your comfort zone, what was once the unknown and frightening becomes your new normal. - Robin Sharma

Once there was a king who received a gift of two magnificent falcons from a neighboring king. He gave the precious birds to his head falconer to get them  trained. Months passed and one day the head falconer informed the king .....that though one of the falcons was flying majestically, soaring high in the sky, the other bird had not moved from its branch since the day it had arrived. The king summoned healers and sorcerers from all the land to tend to the falcon, but no one could make the bird fly. He presented the task to the member of his court, but the next day, the king saw through the palace window that the bird had still not moved from its branch. Having tried everything else, the king thought to himself... "May be I need someone more familiar with the countryside to understand the nature of this problem." So he cried out to his court, "Go and get someone who could help the falcon get flying for a reward" This drew the attention of witty farmer. In the morning the king was thrilled to see the falcon soaring high above the palace gardens. He said to his court, "Bring me the doer of this miracle."The court quickly located the farmer, who came and stood before the king. The king asked him, "How did you make the falcon fly?" With his head bowed, the farmer said to the king, " It was very easy, your highness......I simply cut the branch where the bird was sitting." The farmer was handsomely rewarded as promised We are all made to fly ...to realize our incredible potential as human beings..... But at times we sit in our branches, clinging to the things that are familiar to us. The possibilities are endless, but for most of us, they remain undiscovered. We do not challenge ourselves better rather confine to the familiar, 'comfort zone', so most part of our lives are mediocre... instead of being exciting, thrilling and fulfilling... So let us learn to destroy the branch of laziness or fear we cling to and free ourselves to the glory of flight!!! Celebrate Success.

[lessonsbystories]

The management Guru !!!!

Gabbar se tumhe ek hi aadmi bacha sakta hai, ek hi aadmi ... khud Gabbar - Gabbar Singh of Ramgargh  

Gabbar was a MANAGEMENT GURU as is reflected in some of the timeless management lessons he delivered through the movie Sholay. While he was terrorizing the helpless villagers of Ramgarh, he was (unknowingly probably) also giving management lessons via his own Chambal School of Management  

 1. Competitive Analysis: When Kaalia and his gang came back empty handed from Ram-Garh, the first thing Gabbar asked them was "Kitney aadmi the?" Like any great manager, he sought to find out about his competition. Its important to know the competition and its size ..he understood that even a small team can make a huge difference

2. Brand Building: Gabbar put it very nicely. Mums put their kids to sleep saying "Soja warna Gabbar aa jayega," (sleep else Gabbar would come). this tells you're a bonafide marketing whiz! and you have made a market impact

3. Fair HR Practices: Before Gabbar Singh punished his subordinates, he thought that 6 bullets for 3 people would be unfair. "6 goli, aur aadmi teen, bahut nainsaafi hai!" So, to be fair, he removed three bullets from the revolver.

Another view of this scene is creating an illusion where his insurbodinates had a chance of survival but kills them immediately sending a clear message major failures and losses will not be tolerated

4. Seeking Feedback from Staff: When Gabbar is about to pop Kaalia, he doesn't just take a unilateral decision. Like a good democratic leader, he asks for opinions. "Tera kya hoga Kaaliya?". Giving an employee a final way out  

5. Tough Decisions: Le ab goli kha - Sometimes in the interest of the organisation you got to take hard and unpopular decisions. No one likes to let go of their employees. But sometimes a leader has to bite the bullet and "fire" a few people.' You got that one right, Gabbar Singh did exactly that when he shot all three of his subordinates after laughing like a maniac.

6. Business objectives: Jo darr gaya samjho mar gaya - Setting clear views of what an organisation should tend to do is always important. Factors for laying the successful foundation of a growth oriented business is what Gabbar rightly said

7. Clearing All Dues In Time: Thakur put Gabbar in jail. That didn't go down too well with Gabbar. So, he promised "Bahut pachtaugey Thakur, bahut pachtaogey." On escaping prison, Gabbar immediately proceeded to murder Thakur's entire family. Debt cleared. Moral pay debts in time to clear the burden

8. Threat elimination: Yeh hath mujhey dedey thakur -  On discovering that Thakur's hands were really strong, Gabbar immediately wanted to have them for himself. "Ye haath, humko de de Thakur!" Even though Thakur was not willing to part with his most prized assets, Gabbar cut them off and took them anyway. Identify elements of threats in the market and take measures to minimise them. Hostile takeover could be one of them

9 Employee Motivation Gabbar wanted Basanti to dance, but she was feeling quite shy. Through close observation, he found out that Basanti and Veeru were madly in love with each other. "Bahut yaarana lagta hai." So, he motivated her to shake a leg by threatening to kill Veeru in front of her, ensured his gang was entertained: simple employee motivation

10. Carrot and Stick approach with performance based incentives: At times to get work doen out of your employees you have to take a different approach to get work done. Jab tak tere pair chalenge uski saans chalegi. To make sure that Basanti kept dancing, Gabbar linked her performance with her lover Veeru's life.

11. Never Underestimate Your Competition • Even Gabbar's mistakes are a lesson to any budding management graduate. After Jai and Veeru killed his whole gang, Gabbar came face to face with Thakur. He looked at the "un- armed" old man, laughed and said, "Tu kya ladega mujhse Thakur!" He shouldn't have, because Thakur then beat him to death with just his feet.

12. Brand value: Arey o sambha kitna inam rakhe hai sarkar hum par - knowing & promoting one's own brand is very important and to be reiterated always

13. Market research: Yeh ramgadh waale apni betiyon ko kaunsi chakki ka aata khilate hai re - Market research is important to understand value propositions

14. Key event management: Holi kab hai, kab hai Holi - Conduct advance mapping of key events within the industry and devise penetration strategy to have a competitive edge over your rivals

15. The calmness before the storm: "Suwer ke bachon !" -  Non-performance have to be severely dealt.  This begins with a warning!

[lessonsbystories]

The Pin drop Silence

Silence is golden when you can't think of a good answer. - Muhammad Ali

People get into situations where you would have only silence to answer. There you are in these situations where you are stunned and cannot answer more than a silence. Here are few  notes where the answer could not have had been better than silence 

Take 1: Field Marshal Sam Bahadur Maneckshaw once started addressing a public meeting at Ahmedabad in English. The crowd started chanting, "Speak in Gujarati. We will hear you only if you speak in Gujarati." Field Marshal Sam Bahadur Maneckshaw stopped. Swept the audience with a hard stare and replied,

"Friends, I have fought many a battle in my long career. I have learned Punjabi from men of the Sikh Regiment; Marathi from the Maratha Regiment; Tamil from the men of the Madras Sappers; Bengali from the men of the Bengal Sappers, Hindi from the Bihar Regiment; and even Nepali from the Gurkha Regiment. Unfortunately, there was no soldier from Gujarat from whom I could have learned Gujarati". You could have heard a pin drop silence

Take 2: JFK'S Secretary of State, Dean Rusk, was in France in the early 60's when Charles DeGaule, the French President, decided to pull out of NATO.  DeGaulle said he wanted all US military out of France as soon as possible.  Rusk responded, "does that include the 180,000 who are buried here ?" DeGaulle could not respond.You could have heard a pin drop silence

Take 3: Robert Whiting, an elderly US gentleman of 83, arrived in Paris by plane.At French Customs, he took a few minutes to locate his passport in his carry on. "You have been to France before, Monsieur?" , the Customs officer asked sarcastically.Mr. Whiting admitted that he had been to France previously. "Then you should know enough to have your passport ready."The American said, The last time I was here, I didn't have to show it." "Impossible. Americans always have to show their passports on arrival in France !" , the Customs officer sneered.The American senior gave the Frenchman a long, hard look.Then he quietly explained... "Well, when I came ashore at Omaha Beach, at 4:40 am, on D-Day in 1944, to help liberate your country, I couldn't find a single Frenchman to show a passport to.."You could have heard a pin drop.” 

The above notes may not have occurred, however yes, there are these things where you don't want to venture into by being over-smart. 

[lessonsbystories]

Love is it??

It makes one a better person to have had hardships and to have overcome hardships and not to blame anybody else for your mistakes.-Maureen Forrester

In most parts of the world people bring up their children in many ways. The always loving and doting parents would always want their children to get the best, not suffer or go through hardships as they have gone. That’s a natural parental love for their off-spring; however somewhere in there are we also making eh children incapable of not knowing, feeling, understanding the other side of life. Not making your kids know and feel the hardships that you had to go through is fine, however, will they ever learn the value of hard work and hard earned money? Will they learn to appreciate the value of work that has been put in by another individual? Let us take a look at a story on this context

 One young academically excellent person went to apply for a managerial position in a big company. He passed the first interview; the director did the last interview, made the last decision. The director discovered from the CV that the youth's academic achievements were excellent all the way, from the secondary school until the postgraduate research, never had a year when he did not score.

The director asked: "Did you obtain any scholarships in school?" the youth answered "none".

The director asked: "Was it your father who paid for your school fees?" The youth answered, "My father passed away when I was one year old, it was my mother who paid for my school fees.”

The director continued: "Where did your mother work?" The youth answered, "My mother worked as clothes cleaner. The director requested the youth to show his hands. The youth showed a pair of hands that were smooth and perfect.

The director asked: "Have you ever helped your mother wash the clothes before?" The youth answered, "Never, my mother always wanted me to study and read more books. Furthermore, my mother can wash clothes faster than me.’

The director said, "I have a request. When you go back today, go and clean your mother's hands, and then see me tomorrow morning.

 The youth felt that his chance of landing the job was high. He went back and happily requested his mother to let him clean her hands. His mother felt strange, happy but with mixed feelings, she showed her hands to the kid. The youth cleaned his mother's hands slowly. His tear fell as he did that. It was the first time he noticed that his mother's hands were so wrinkled, and there were so many bruises in her hands. Some bruises were so painful that his mother shivered when they were cleaned with water. This was the first time the youth realized that it was this pair of hands that washed the clothes every day to enable him to pay the school fee. The bruises in the mother's hands were the price that the mother had to pay for his graduation, academic excellence and his future.

 After finishing the cleaning of his mother hands, the youth quietly washed all the remaining clothes for his mother. That night, mother and son talked for a very long time. Next morning, the youth went to the director's office. The Director noticed the tears in the youth's eyes, asked: " Can you tell me what have you done and learned yesterday in your house?"

The youth answered, "I cleaned my mother's hand, and also finished cleaning all the remaining clothes”

The Director asked, "please tell me your feelings."

The youth said, “Number 1, I know now what is appreciation. Without my mother, there would not the successful me today. Number 2, by working together and helping my mother, only I now realize how difficult and tough it is to get something done. Number 3, I have come to appreciate the importance and value of family relationship.’

 The director said, "This is what I am looking for to be my manager. I want to recruit a person who can appreciate the help of others, a person who knows the sufferings of others to get things done, and a person who would not put money as his only goal in life. You are hired.”

 Had the director here not asked the young man to look at his mother’s hands and had youth not complied with the request, he would have been ignorant of his mother's efforts. When he was hired to become a manager, he would have never known the sufferings of his employees and would always blame others. People, may be good academically, may be even successful for a while, but eventually would not feel sense of achievement. Making our kids know about our hardships is not stopping down in a way also enabling them to be strong

[lessonsbystories]

Where do I go now?

People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they're not on your road doesn't mean they've gotten lost. - H. Jackson Brown, Jr. 

A stage comes in every body or should I say in the lives of many about love and marriage. What is the right thing and what do I choose? You are in a spot where you have two roads ahead of you? This is one such story of love and marriage. On man was in a similar status of life one day. He was in a confused state of mind to take the correct path, however not knowing what each may lead to? So he decided to go and ask his guru. He went to his guru and asked for an explanation on the difference between love and marriage. The guru,  a wise and learned man  told the disciple to go to the rose garden and come back with the tallest rose plant, on a condition that he should not come back the same path he took while going. The disciple went to the garden and came back empty handed. When asked why, the disciple gave his answer: As I went in, I saw a tall beautiful tree. But I kept going on for the next tree expecting a better tree. But moving forward, I came across only smaller plants and since I cannot trace the path back, I had to return empty handed. The guru said: this is love Then he said "now go to the sunflower garden and bring the most beautiful sunflower plant. Now the additional condition is that once you pluck a sunflower plant, you can't pluck another." Now the disciple goes into the garden and comes back quickly with a plant. The guru asks, is this the most beautiful plant? The disciple says "No guru. Based on my previous experience, I did not want to miss and hence I took the first plant which looked beautiful to me. On the way back, I saw more beautiful plants but since I was not allowed to pick another plant, I came back with the plant I had originally picked." The guru smiled and said: this is marriage The disciple here was in state of 2 thoughts and was not sure about the path to be taken. He took a valuable guidance. At times we need these kind of guidance to ensure that makes our decision better.