Trans women are not cis men.
Trans women are not like cis men.
Cis men are statistically dangerous. This is an incontrovertible fact proven by enormous amounts of empirical data. Cis men are empowered by patriarchy to enact misogynistic violence against those they hold power over with little scrutiny or consequence. The construction of hegemonic masculinity requires participating in ritualized misogyny. Cis men, when their masculinity is called into question, typically react by intensifying displays of signifiers of masculinity, which include things like violence, physicality, misogyny and sexual aggression. Cis men benefit from patriarchy at the expense of those who aren't cis men and the majority of cis men work towards the continued existence of patriarchy because it is in their own material interests to do so.
Treating cis men as potentially dangerous is not "androphobia" or "misandry", it's being aware of reality. Claiming that cis men are not dangerous is straightforwardly a denial of reality.
Treating trans women as dangerous because cis men are in fact dangerous is not "androphobia" or "misandry", it's transmisogyny.
You cannot "yes, and" transmisogynists who incorrectly extrapolate things that are true about cis men onto trans women. You cannot form an effective counter-argument against transmisogyny on the basis of "even if trans women were like cis men". You must reject this premise entirely, you must not entertain it even "for the sake of argument". This premise is where the entirety of the transmisogyny in this argument is located. It's no less transmisogynistic if you (wrongly) think the perception of cis men as violent and dangerous is unjustified (e.g. because you mistakenly think that acknowledging something is the case means claiming that it is inherently the case).
When ole ivar lovaas claims that autistic children lack personhood ("You see, you start pretty much from scratch when you work with an autistic child. You have a person in the physical sense—they have hair, a nose, and a mouth—but they are not people in the psychological sense."), we cannot let this claim stand and simply argue for the rights of autistic children from an animal rights angle instead. When disabled people are accused of faking their disability this is a form of ableism, not prejudice against non-disabled people - even if their disability isn't acknowledged by those enacting this form of ableism. When transphobic people claim that trans people don't exist, that doesn't render their transphobia into prejudice againt cis people. Oppression cannot be understood on the terms of the ideologies that justify it.
The claim that transmisogyny is partially "androphobia" or "misandry" is as ignorant as it is transmisogynistic.
You have absolutely no right to instrumentalize transfeminized people for your repugnant anti-feminist project of positing the absurd lie that "androphobia" or "misandry" exists as form of structural oppression.
Telling trans women (who are even more likely to be victims of sexualized and physical violence at the hands of cis men than cis women are) that they are being "paranoid" or "irrational" for correctly understanding and insisting on the difference between themselves and cis men, for understanding that their interests are not aligned with those of cis men, is an unbearable level of misogyny.
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