no más cokey cola :0

Musician and sweater enthusiast She/Her, They/Them KT/25/Aquarius/California I literally only talk about ska and D&D

[moveslikekeithrichards]

labubu was meant to be hanging off a kindergartners backpack filthy as fuck with no eyes left

[rovenderkitting]

Ok but when poor book Grace got scurvy on Erid you just know he was making F-tier pirate jokes all the time To Cope (you can take the teacher out of the middle school, but you can’t take the middle school out of the teacher). And Rocky would be visiting his best buddy in the ICU, worried sick, with no idea what the hell this “aaar!” shit means. Like, “come quick, Doctor! He says his timbers are shivering!”

[pansy2025]

goo goo dolls if they were in dune: and i don’t want the worm to see me

[mezzodical]

[laterkiss]

happy pride to my favourite post on reddit

[fiore-firelily]

while I am talking to you about something gay and stupid a mosquito lands on my arm and sucks all my blood out in an instant, swelling to the size of a person as my remains flutter cartoonishly down to the ground, and it continues the conversation where I left off in a high pitched approximation of my voice

[fishpondfish]

it is impossible to watch a movie. every night i think i want to watch a movie. no movie gets watched. because it's not possible

[mousidy]

and yet they keep making movies with the hopes that one day humanity will discover a way to watch them. it's so inspiring

[toskarin]

me: and then you warm the glass a little with your hand so it doesn't foam too much

my alien: just like the ufo

me: [tensely] not everything is like the ufo

[rambrandt-the-painter]

im going scaly mode

[rambrandt-the-painter]

hhnnngggghnggg HNNGGGGNGNNGGG AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! *transforms into this*

[rambrandt-the-painter]

[agnesmontague]

ive invented (note: dubious claim) something i call the bear diet which is mostly fruits and vegetables with fish as the main protein source and something like once a month you eat a few hyperprocessed foods of your liking because that is when you, the bear, raid a dumpster in the suburbs

[stellarskyes]

after the hyperprocessed foods, do you take tranquilizers to simulate getting captured by animal control and returned to the wild?

[agnesmontague]

i would settle for melatonin gummies but well. knock yourself out

[sludgebitch]

"🥪" is shorthand for "🍞🧀🍅🥬🍞"

[sludgebitch]

can you people stop reblogging this my notes look like lunchtime

[kidzbopdeathgrips]

people aren't addicted to coffee because of the caffeine they're addicted to coffee because of the pooping

[loveridden1999]

problematic sudoku solving skills gap

[featuringmarkhoppus]

[badassdemonsword-deactivated202]

[thealphapigeon]

I follow the "leave nothing but footprints take nothing but photos" rule of state/national parks yeah because conservation. But also because when I was 11 i read a short story about a girl who went to a museum and stole a bandage flake off a mummy on display with the mentality of "im just one person one piece won't be missed" then at night she was visited by the mummy and it plucked a single hair from her head and then the next night a different mummy took another hair and she realized that there were only so many pieces to her before there would be nothing left and that story was forever wedged in my brain. Anyways leave cool rocks where you find them or the mummies will get you

[insecuregodcomplex]

[lesbianboyfriend]

[tweet reading: Everything I say is a joke Unless you agree And in that case Speak to me privately I have even crazier ideas /end ID]

[victusinveritas]

[ratbastarddotfuck]

you have to forgive the printer because it's one of the most machine-ass machines we interact with on a day to day basis. that thing says kerchunk. hardly anything says kerchunk these days. you can't get mad at her when she kerchunks up a little.