far from a poet @lineamentum - Tumblr Blog

yallthemwitches

Jily moments by dying_fish (Instagram)

luxfatale

a study i did of “first braids to leave orbit (unconfirmed)” ft. Christina Koch and all of us🌎✨

wolfythewitch

Problematic lifespan gap

bizarro-report-deactivated20171

catwithaknife

https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/kzqpd9/heres-an-insane-story-about-a-rogue-music-teacher-cutting-a-kids-hair

snailbutch

what the fuck

guu

i’m just gonna take this post for a moment so i can rant but like

i Hate how entitled adults can feel over a child’s hair!

it started when i was young myself, i wanted a mohawk, but my dad didn’t approve of that look on a “girl”, and insisted i’d regret such a bold cut. at 16 i was finally given full autonomy over my own head.

but then i have a son and everyone around us is trying to keep his hair short. when we finally moved out just me my partner and him, i told him he doesn’t need to get any haircuts he doesn’t want.

so he starts growing it out, it’s still short but coming on mid-length. his teacher makes a point to tell me it’s getting long as if i don’t have eyes. i hear her walking out with him one day talking to him about haircuts, as if to coax him into one. eventually i get child services called on me for ‘forcing a transgender lifestyle’ over what i can only assume is from a combination of me drawing cute ponies on his valentine box and letting him go to school in a ponytail.

he kept it short for awhile after but told me he wanted to grow it out again, so i let him of course. he comes home one day after getting a haircut at his grandpa’s and tells me he didn’t Want the haircut.

i ask why he got it then and learned he was bribed with a promise of a surprise IF he cut his hair.

tl;dr people need to back the hell up off of children and let them have owership of what’s on THEIR body! /rant

e-v-roslyn

Same thing about getting a child to curl or straighten their hair. Or do anything with it. Just let kids have control over their bodies.

captainroxythefoxy

This happened to me when I was little too!! Growing up I had naturally tight Shirley Temple curls. The only problem was that you can’t get a hair brush through it if your life depended on it until it grew out over a few years.

but This One Lady from church decided that leaving my hair messy and curly was child abuse and threatened to call social services on my family every damn time she saw me until one day she was the designated kid watcher and ho boy my momma tells me i came out with tears in my eyes and greasy slicked down hair and that’s where she ends the story because i think my mother beat her ass but yeah.

Leave kids hair alone.

disease-danger-darkness-silence

I’m going to be honest, parents who are super-controlling of their children’s hair creep me the fuck out and I’m not entirely certain why except that I get a vague feeling they kind of relegate them to, “annoying talking doll” status.

pretentioussongtitle

I loved my daughter’s long blond hair. It was thick and wavy and beautiful but when she told me she wanted it cut short ‘like a boy’(she was four) I took her to the salon and let her whack it off.

The stylist was skeptical, ‘are you sure?” and the thing is, she said this to me, not my daughter. So I asked my girl ‘are you sure you want it cut short?’ She was. The hair went. The stylist acted nervous most of the way through like she was waiting for one of us to burst into tears, but it looked cute! And my daughter loved it! (And it’s been short ever since.)

kintatsujo

Autonomy over your hair is bodily autonomy and we as a culture need to start holding bodily autonomy as sacred

mdzhb

there is a reason that so many of us who’ve experienced trauma will reclaim control over our bodies and our selves by cutting and dying our hair. it’s part of us. it’s part of our expression. that’s vitally important to people, especially kids, who are still early in the process of learning how they fit into the world around them.

theconcealedweapon

For some reason, “stop enforcing your gender identity and sexual orientation on children” never applies to cis-het people who are the only ones actually enforcing it.

naamahdarling

About this:

Some reasons, not exhaustive:

Parents tightly controlling this shit is damaging and super often indicative of sexism or queerphobia they will begin imposing or are already imposing on the child.

Early form of indoctrination into boys vs. girls behavior; it begins super young when the child is very malleable. Sets the stage for strict gender roles.

A parent who does not respect their child’s autonomy over something as trivial as their hair is absolutely not going to defend their child from other assaults on their autonomy, unless those assaults are property crimes that challenge or might lead their child to challenge their ownership of the child’s body.

It’s disgusting.

It also goes for life partners. Controlling someone’s appearance either directly, or indirectly through repeated “hints” and shit-talking people who don’t meet their standards is at the very least toxic, and sometimes it is downright abusive. There’s a reason “woman cuts her hair in a way that she knows you don’t like” is seen as a “warning sign” that your wife might “leave you.” The hold is breaking. I did it, progressively, as things spiraled down. It wasn’t rebellion. It was reclamation. (Also me realizing that I really didn’t like having long hair. This is way better.

By the way, cutting someone’s hair without consent is assault, same as punching them, and in many places it is legally recognized as such. Get their asses.

dykepuffs

I have a solid theory that at least in the UK, where it’s common for small children being raised into boyhood to get their hair buzzed at the barbers once every six weeks or so, and to just have it washed in the interim, and for small children being raised into girlhood to likewise have the haircuts and washing but ALSO before they’re old enough to manage their long hair themselves, to be forced to sit still for daily or twice-daily brushing/combing/plaiting/tying/twisting/braiding/sectioning etc, all of which can be painful or at least uncomfortable on a sensitive scalp - That the entire point is that it trains those children into accepting regular, painful, intimate touch on their bodies that they aren’t allowed to say ‘no’ to, and where saying ‘no’ is treated as a sign of laziness, selfishness, childishness etc. Got to get up early and take longer than your brothers, to get appropriately Ready, and if you don’t, you’re dirty.

They’re also disciplined in the interim too - The hair is used as a reason why they can’t do things the children-being-boyed do: Can’t go in the sea, your hair will get tangled and it’ll be cold on your back all day. Can’t play in the bushes, your hair will be a mess. Can’t lie down on the grass or do tumbles, your hair…

And then the child-being-girled who wants to cut the hair off so that they CAN do all those things… God help them.