the voices

the hyperfixations i can't send my friends because they aren't online enough :(

[literalillyyyy]

when a good man cries by cmat is sooo stratt like “help me not hate myself” “what do you do when a good man cries/and youre the one who keeps him up at night” “how could you do what you said you wouldn’t do like all the other guys” (asking how could grace put her in that situation) like she is the people’s mess dunboyne Diana

[literalillyyyy]

Conrad fisher and his character development hits differently after you’ve been through his situation (almost to a T except without the actual death part) because the things that grief/illness does to you is actually insane. Like I can barely remember two whole months of my life it’s a miracle he was as chill as he was because if I had to deal with a mom who had cancer, a bitchass little brother who wants my girl, and a dad who has betrayed my family in the worst times of my life I fear the summer house would become the setting for an 80s slasher movie.

[literalillyyyy]

Every day I mourn the hozier concert I could not attend but also feel grateful because my mom was gonna bring her own college roommate and I fear they wouldn’t have caught the vibe

Like how do I turn to them and say “okay this one is about how English colonization turned the pagan Irish natives to Catholics through cruel starvation and horrible violence and in doing so almost entirely wiped out the Gaelic language so half of it isn’t on English but in a language that is almost dead but every day the Irish people come together to pass it down to their kids in order to save it. Also it’s really horny.”

also they’re homophobic so don’t think that would end well

[literalillyyyy]

I am legitimately convinced that no one understands or is as big of a fan of yuji itadori as I am. None of you bitches get him like I do. My favorite character possibly ever created.

[literalillyyyy]

posted something like this before but no one heard me the first time around but imagine Peter struggling with derealization (especially after night terrors) after the whole mysterio incident and Johnny warming his hand enough to give Peter the sensation of being awake ☹️☹️☹️ reassuring him that it’s over now and he’s safe and present ☹️☹️☹️

[literalillyyyy]

“Fall out boy hasnt been good since pre-hiatus!” Okay so tell me you haven’t seen the Superman So Much for Stardust Edit without telling me you haven’t seen the Superman So Much For Stardust Edit because that shit will make anyone a believer in modern fob.

[literalillyyyy]

Pete wentz always got me frustrated as hell because like you SUCK. you are TERRIBLE. But you also served ungodly amounts of cunt and that’s just an objective fact like I can’t help but find you iconic goddamnit

[literalillyyyy]

when I was under anesthesia I was worried that I might like spill secrets or come out or something like that but the only thing I did was turn to my mom, tears in my eyes, and say, “Mom…the Mars rover…they just LEFT him there.” And then began to hysterically sob.

so yeah naturally I had no chance against project Hail Mary are you kidding me

[literalillyyyy]

it sucks being in a place where you can’t really consume any media centering around cancer due to personal issues because like babe that’s whole mcr album I’m missing out on

[literalillyyyy]

does anyone else ever think of ryan potentially sitting down, queueing up spotify, and trying to give the new album brendon had put out a chance only to hear "signed a record deal at 17/hated by every local band", cringe, try to keep going, and then hear "you'll live forever as a local god" and realize that even fifteen years later it still hurts?

[vengeancevixen]

There is nothing cringe about it. They literally were hated by other bands who didn’t think they paid their dues. It’s the first time Brendon has ever talked about their early beginnings in a song. *should have been a big hint that this was a goodbye album* Also, I don’t actually think this song is even about Ryan. In speaking to Mike Viola, the cowriter, this is about Brendon and Mike’s experiences in this industry. The line about the bc rich and shredding is obviously about Mike. If you know Mike, this is obvious. The lines about the melting face at the Bellagio (Panic played there outside in the LV heat in 2018), teaching kids how to rock n roll is referring to Brendon’s music studio for kids. This song is absolutely not a diss and i don’t even know how anyone could think that. And, no, it’s not about Ryan.

[literalillyyyy]

I didn’t mean the “cringe” part in that the lyric is embarrassing, I meant it more as if Ryan heard the song and winced remembering their earlier days and realizing that was what it was about. Also, I had no idea about Mike Viola; admittedly, most of my information comes from the genius article on this song!! There’s definitely a chance it’s not about ryan (that’s just what genius said, lol). I also think it can be up to interpretation, because the song definitely has a mocking tone to it and I doubt it’s directed toward Brendon himself. But then again, most everything is speculation, so who knows the real intent behind the song! If Brendon or Mike have spoken about it publicly and I haven’t seen it please let me know!!

[literalillyyyy]

my friend tried to make fun of me for crying six separate times during my second project Hail Mary watch but what he didn’t see was that it was the first thing that I could actually shed a tear over after upping my Zoloft prescription so fuck you logen and thank you sign of the times by Harry styles

[literalillyyyy]

if I was a member of Ryland grace’s class in middle school I would class of 2020 the fuck out of that like

“yeah I never did a frog dissection :( you know why? Because EVERY GOVERNMENT shot my SCIENCE TEACHER into another SOLAR SYSTEM—“

class of 2020 never got a graduation? No 7th grade class at grocer Cleveland middle never got a teacher 💔 I just know they had some ass sub compared to him

[literalillyyyy]

I’m making a pinterest board for my characters instead of writing (as one does) and pinterest keeps telling me to pin aesthetic photos of books and it’s like no silly algorithmic photo app this gal wouldn’t read a book for fun if someone put a gun to her head

[literalillyyyy]

I think one of the saddest parts about Ryland being sent against his will is really the inevitability of it. Because even if he had magically made it past the front gates, down the road, stole a car and went into hiding…it would never have lasted. Stratt probably would have found him within 24 hours. And she would have hated herself for the relief she’d feel when someone came in saying they located him.

but there was never anywhere to hide. can’t hide from fate, I guess.

[literalillyyyy]

headcanon that I also put in my fic is that when medicated!andrew was mad at Kevin he’d hide his meds until he got so far into withdrawal that he couldn’t remember where he put them leading to something like:

Andrew: Kevin if you don’t get me my fucking meds now I’m going to SLAUGHTER EVERYONE IN THIS BUILDING—

Kevin, prying open their air conditioning unit: THIS DORM IS A FUCKING. NIGHTMARE.

[literalillyyyy]

peterick is great because they are the epitome of “there’s one person who truly understands me and I fucking hate the guy” like they love and hate each other in such a borderline toxic and codependent way that it makes me want to take notes

like you could tell me that they’ve fucked several times and I’d be like “yeah duh” and you could tell me that they can’t even hug because it’s too awkward and I’d be like “yeah, duh.”

[literalillyyyy]

when i first watched the Pitt (I think my parents had it on and I watched a random episode in passing) I saw Robby and Collins’s relationship and automatically assumed they were exes. Like I saw them and said “oh that’s a divorced couple”. I proceed to sit down and watch the show only to find out that they are in fact coworkers with strange tension (a pattern i pick up on pretty quickly with these characters)