Wandering The Galaxy

Really just a collection of random fandoms. X-Files/HP/Dresden Files/ SW/DW/MLP. I'm all over the place...

[yasakajinjya]

[petitpoulailler]

visual definition of ‘audacity’

[bouncingbabycage]

Okay, so funny story.

Several years ago I volunteered at an aquarium. What most people don’t know is that for most of the rare and unique specimens, the aquarium usually has a second one down in the wet lab, so that the animals can get switched out if they are stressed or sick or just want a break from being on display.

My job was to clean the lobster tanks down in the wet lab. So I don’t know if you know much about lobsters, but they can be quite aggressive and will kill (and eat) each other. They will, however, don’t mind sharing a large tank if they are separated by dividers, or if their claws are clamped shut with rubber bands.

So all morning I am grabbing lobsters, banding them, putting them in coolers, and scrubbing tanks, and throughout this whole time I am being watched.

In a tank near the entrance way is a massive lobster–we’re talking over four feet long and nearly twenty pounds. It was his turn to get some rest while his “twin” (who is actually a good foot shorter than he is) was on display in the tanks upstairs in the aquarium. This guy is so big he has his own tank, which was actually a modified plastic horse trough with salt water circulation through it. He was happy as a clam (er, lobster) in there and the aquarium has learned over the years that he likes to be the center of attention, so his tank is right by the entrance way so he can keep his eyes on us.

His favorite game is to lunge and snap his claws at anyone who gets close to him. His claws are bigger than oven mitts, and his crusher claw has definitely seen some action because it is dented and pitted like a well-worn suit of armor. Since he’s alone in his tank, there’s no need to band his claws, which he loves to wave and snap in the most ferocious way.

However, as vicious and mean as he is, his claws are too heavy for him to lift above the surface of the water.

Talk about audacity–pitiful audacity! Imagine being glared at by a gigantic lobster, one who would be a king out in the ocean, one who could easily remove your hand from your wrist, one who likes to lunge and snap at anything that gets within three feet of his tank, but the poor thing can’t raise his claws out of the water!

[bunjywunjy]

holy shit reblogging for awesome aquarium knowledge

[lizabitty-blog]

10 years married. 13 years together. It hasn’t all been easy, especially these last 2 years. I still wouldn’t trade you for the world. However much time we have, I have no regrets about sharing it with you. You mean everything to me, Matt. Happy anniversary, my love. https://www.instagram.com/p/Bxylu7KFR24U3RiqlA-YHSBxJojjGlsDWAB-go0/?igshid=1khr023jw7te1

[hypochondriac-butters]

reblog this if you are gay, constantly tired, or a cryptic entity that merely inhabits a human form

[chulshik]

I was out with a friend tonight doing one of my fave things. Reading the backs of romance novels aloud. Found this gem.

This is honestly the most wild sounding romance novel I have ever seen and thought it might brighten someone’s day.

[island-delver-go]

[creed-of-corruption]

OK FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON’T REALIZE, SANDRA HILL IS THE WOMAN WHO WROTE “ROUGH AMD READY” ANOTHER EROTIC VIKING NOVEL. SOME OF THE MORE MEMORABLE QUOTES BEING:

“As Hilda’s buttermilk bosoms squished up against his granite abs, Torolf almost had a dick aneurysm.”

“Torolf entered her like she was a lottery. His engorged pecker pushed inside her and she felt fulfilled with sexual fulfillment.”

“Her body was like a beautiful flower that was opening and somebody was pushing their dick inside it.”

YOU DO NOT KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE I HAVE READ THIS TO AT COLLEGE. ONE GUY COMPLETELY LOST IT FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES AFTER HEARING THE PHRASE “DICK ANEURYSM.”

[martianbees]

[ultrafacts]

Source: [x]

Click HERE for more facts!

[forcearama]

I’m pretty sure Star Wars can try for another 40 years and nothing will destroy me as much as this did and still does. WHY DID CAVAN SCOTT HAVE TO COME FOR MY LIFE LIKE THIS I ASK YOU ALL. 

[captainsblogsupplemental]

[ruffboi-mags]

i would like to dedicate this to literally every cat we have ever had custody of, however long or briefly.

[justsomeantifas]

i’m so sick of news articles that look like this 

it builds itself up like OKAY WE FOUND THESE DEVASTATING RESULTS

and then you go in to look and you find it had a sample size of 40 

and then you’re like okay, what was the fantastic difference between these 40 people when sleeping with and without a dog

and the article is like

…so you get through it and you’re like you’re trying to tell me you think this is substantial in any capacity, this 40 sample size 3% difference ass bullshit??????????? you fucking shitforbrick bad at math fake ass science losers?

[variastrix]

[did-you-know]

Archaeologists discovered an ancient ‘meme’ in Turkey. In 2012, construction for a cable car in Antakya revealed a 2,000-year-old mosaic, which features a super-chill skeleton reclining with some bread and wine next to the inscription ‘Be cheerful, live your life.’ Source Source 2

[shampooligan]

you know what lets actually bring back lolcats, they were so simple and so benevolent. like check this out

[flimflamflummox-deactivated2021]

Here’s my favorite lolcat:

Next stop: Noobshire

[switch-up-snowfox]

it’s often the cute meme’s that age well once you get past the “literally everywhere” phase.

[scaliefox]

I like this classic

[princesstigerbelle]

More classics

[hymnofvalefor]

I went through almost ten years of photos on my Facebook page go find this

[owl-librarian]

But WAIT! DO NOT FORGET. the granddaddy: 

[tzikeh]

HOLD UP THERE 

SKIPPY 

“I CAN HAS CHEEZBURGER” GOT FAMOUS OFF THE BACKS OF THE PIONEERING LOLCATS

THIS WAS IN THE BEFORE-TIMES 

WHEN THEY WERE KNOWN AS 

CAT MACROS 

AND THEY DIDN’T HAVE TO MAKE ANY SENSE

AND NOW YOU WILL HAVE TO SCROLL THROUGH A FUCKIN’ FEW MORE

[lizabitty-blog]

Kai has now decided that he is joining the Midnight Society too. #blackcat #catsofinstagram #areyouafraidofthedark #babyboyjerk https://www.instagram.com/p/BtziDinAPnTJ5oIIpDA7AiGpzwVJjhv28EaQ880/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=eanq67odtlv8

[niggazinmoscow]

Ameeeeeen! Crews has been nothing but a class act.

[jadorexjaii]

OOOOOPPP

[ckmcmxcvi]

gather him mr crews 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[tiredofthis-stuff]

I’m not agreeing with DL but Terry knows he can fold DL up like a pretzel but he didn’t to that old white man who physical assaulted him?? DL didn’t grab him in front of his wife.

[thirtyonestories-deactivated202]

First, what terry is saying is a hypothetical. He’s not actually confronting DL but he’s saying if DL thinks violence is the answer does that mean Terry should be violent with him. Terry has already admitted that yes, he could have assaulted the exec who violated him but what would that have accomplished? He would have been seen as an angry black man and thrown in jail and if he got out, he would have found himself blacklisted. He was in a room of the execs friends and he’s a heavily muscled black man. The problem dumbasses like DL, and apparently you, seem to have is thinking physical violence is the only one way to solve a problem. Terry played it smart, got the exec blacklisted instead and hit him in his pockets. That doesn’t make him weak and it doesn’t mean he didn’t want to beat the shit out of the man who assaulted, it just means at the time he played it smarter than DL, you, or any of his other detractors would have.

[stephanemiroux]

It all boils down to “are you truly a victim if you didn’t do the exact action I have decided you HAD to do?”

[green-blooded]

[msnbcpundit]

REMEMBER SKIP-IT FROM THE 90’S

[apjvff]

my weapon of choice during school yard fights 

[almostvivian]

DnD campaign but the only weapons are 90′s toys @riskpig

[allisquish]

Distance weapon: those sky dancer propeller toys.

[riskpig]

I’ll allow it.

[sensitive-inferno]

I have but two words:

[durnesque-esque]

Are those a weapon or piece of armor?

[kaleymonster]

Party walks into the inn to rest and the pub looks like

[riskpig]

Perfection.

[medinaquirin]

@anotherspecter

[biglawbear]

I ride into battle on one of these

[bardicknowledgeblogger]

Animal Companions

[techcat]

Fresh combat

[themetaisawesome]

Monks have to use these

[ariassong]

Wizard’s Spell book

[ariassong]

Warlock Patrons

Archfey

Fiend

Celestial

Great Old One

The undying

[kalkris]

THE B A R D

[bardicknowledgeblogger]

It got better since I last saw it

[unfortunatelyimaginary]

This is so weird bc being born in 1997 I saw all these toys… old, dirty, and faded by the sun

it’s so weird to think of them as new and current toys rather than the relics of a bygone age

[thegirlinthebyakko]

Currency

[library-seraph]

I ALWAYS THOUGHT I DREAMT HITCLIPS UP

my best friend at 5 had one and as an adult i’ve always been like what the fuck were those turn of the millenium ipod things

[ruffboi-mags]

#okay tamagotchis were definitely 2000s

ACTUALLY

yes, it was still a fad in the early aughts, but it was biggest in my school in 1997 and 1998.

[horrorandhalloween]

[lullabyknell]

I was just watching Star Trek: Beyond and my little sister is watching Brooklyn Nine-Nine S5, so now I can’t stop thinking about a Star Trek AU for B99. 

Captain Holt is obviously the captain. Terry is the XO. 

Of the U.S.S. Brooklyn, probably. 

Like in canon, Captain Holt becomes captain after the last captain retires. It’s basically exactly the same plots of B99, just in a Star Trek AU. The NYPD and all its characters are now Starfleet, including Madeline Wuntch and the Vulture and etc. Some characters are now aliens.  

I don’t know much about this AU yet, because there are so many directions to go with crew positions, but I do know for certain that Raymond Holt and his husband Kevin are a Vulcan/Human couple. Which one is the Vulcan and which one is the human? I don’t know, because it can go beautifully either way. 

Captain Holt, of course, makes a perfect Vulcan. A black gay Vulcan with a previous gambling addiction. Everyone talks about him like he’s a loose cannon and wild card, especially other Vulcans. 

Vulcan 1: “I see he has become no less rebellious. He still acts more befitting a comedian than a captain.” 

Jake: “What.” 

When they hear that their captain has a human husband, everybody is like, “Oh, opposites attract, right? I bet his human husband is super friendly and shows lots of emotions.” And then they meet Kevin and they’re like, “Oh, you married a human who is practically a Vulcan, okay.” (Holt: “What are you talking about? Kevin is frequently overemotional and very expressive.” Jake: “What.”) 

On the OTHER HAND, if Kevin is the Vulcan and Holt is the human, it’s still good, because then you get to have all the Vulcans thinking that Holt is the funniest and most interesting man alive. (They still think he’s a wild card, but he gets away with it more for being human. He’s infamous for having “seduced” Kevin.) Everyone knows it’s nearly impossible to charm Vulcans, but every Vulcan who’s not a complete asshole absolutely LOVES the human Raymond Holt. Holt has mastered Vulcan humor. They think he’s a riot. 

Vulcan 2 (preventing the crew from getting in somewhere they need to go for a mission): “Your charm will not work this time, Captain Raymond Holt. I will not be persuaded no matter how charismatic you are.” 

Jake: “What.” 

Kevin is a scholar/professor who travels with the ship or meets it frequently because he and Holt are embarrassingly in love. (Not that you would be able to tell they’re married by human standards, but they’re incredibly affectionate by Vulcan standards. It’s ridiculous.) 

There has to be at least one android. Preferably two because I love androids and why do we limit ourselves unnecessarily. I’m thinking the best potential androids are Charles, Rosa, Gina, and Amy. 

Charles. 

Robot with anxiety and a passion for food. (Whether Charles is an android or not, he is constantly grossing everyone out with the weird alien food he eats. He INSISTS that the replicators just aren’t the same as- Jake: “Just eat your space worms, Charles, and please stop talking about ‘mouth-feel’.”) 

Jake Peralta LOVES his robot best friend. Charles Boyle has ALWAYS wanted a human sidekick. 

The Boyle cousins are now a family of androids. 

Rosa 

Charles: “Emotions are the best!” 

Rosa: “Sure. How do I uninstall them?” 

Rosa is probably the Security Officer. 

Someone (about to get their ass beat): “Isn’t it supposed to be written in your code to ‘do no harm to humans’?” 

Security Officer Rosa Diaz: “No.” 

Amy 

Robot with anxiety, obsessive compulsive tendencies, and an extreme sense of competitiveness. 

Loves her dumb, squishy human Jake Peralta, who apparently once had a childhood dream of marrying Robocop (and is still into really old movies like that and Die Hard). 

Gina

Gina (probably Communications Officer?) as an android is basically that one scene from Futurama. 

Gina: “Admit it. You all just think that robots were invented to make humans’ lives easier.” 

Terry: “Well… aren’t you?” 

Gina: “I’ve never made anyone’s life easier and you know it.” 

How to pick? All possibilities are good. Unfortunately, the number of androids probably has to be limited to make way for aliens. 

Jake is probably one of the ship’s helmsmen. Amy is a sciences division officer and one of the ship’s navigators. I’m not totally sure on what Charles does yet, but Charles as CMO would be hilarious (he is… like… the exact opposite of Bones, except he does have that bad divorce going on in the background), so that’s a definitely possibility. 

I have no clue what Scully and Hitchcock do. Are they just… there? On the bridge? Or nearby? They probably shouldn’t be on the bridge, but they’re still recurring characters who somehow find a lot of trouble. 

B99 Star Trek AU. The possibilities are endless and perfect. 

[knitmeapony]

Hitchcock and Scully are obviously the androids and/or holograms.  They come with the ship.  They are permanently integrated into the ship’s computer’s matrix and can not be removed.  They are just there.  Sometimes they do helpful things.  Mostly they do not.  Often they can be found chilling in supply closets and the mess hall.

[flospughsadadad-deactivated2021]

[veeagainsttheday]

Whoever put this gifset together is a monster.

[libertarirynn-deactivated202006]

Hi yes I would like to sue this post for emotional distress