long live harry potter @longliveharrypotter - Tumblr Blog

I'm so fucking gutted. So hurt. In so much heartache and heart wrenching pain.

Which is stupid because like Madeline explained, I can't really expect anything. It's too wild. But fuck I can feel my chest being torn apart right now.

I want you. I want you so badly it's all I can think of. I want you to tell me you love me and come pick me up and kiss me against the wall.

But I'm alone.

Alone and so very sad

#personal

ladymirdan

how quickly that all fell to shit.

and the worst part about it, you think you're the good guy here. you think that you did nothing wrong and that i overreacted and i'm not calm enough to talk to.

like you didn't break up with me after i told you how selfish it was to ask me to give you a blow job first thing in the morning and then just walk off like i got just as much satisfaction out of that act as you did.

that's what cause you to crash out. which, honestly, is really embarrassing for you. on top of the fact that everyone i have talked to, (and that's a lot of people) have all agreed, you were being selfish.

and the wildest thing, you thought that this was the best time to break things off. not after a reasonable, grounded conversation, not even after a discussion. just throw it all out.

and that hurt. it hurt that you didn't respect me enough to wait to have the conversation when i was in my own place. or when i wasn't about to go to work. or when i was clothed for fucks sake.

so you showed who you truly are. a selfish, self-intitled piece of shit who doesn't think anything through and wont go out of his way for anyone but himself.

it's unreal.

it's not who i thought you were. which is the biggest disappointment of all. your complete and total disregard for my well-being shows how little you actually cared about me. i cannot stand the idea that my poor cats are stuck in your piss-filled apartment. it's all so shit.

#personal

after I left today, you sent me a text that said "gosh I miss you already."

and that made me melt. you have me in a tizzy. all I want to do is cuddle up with you and kiss you and talk to you. I want to feel your hands on me, feel your arms around me, hear you laugh.

I'm just tired and smitten

#personal

I'm here again, cause I want to talk about you. and for whatever reason I don't want to write about in my journal right now.

maybe because it's new, maybe because I feel like i need to put some art in there first. but I am listening to the chitter chatter of everyone at this rotary district planning meeting, but i am just thinking about you. and kissing you in my car, and all the songs that you have sung to me, and the songs that you have wrote that are kind about me.

they make me squirm, and butterflies spawn in my chest and i just want to think about all the ways that you feel like you can't get enough of me. which is basically what you said in one song that you said was about me, and about your ex. and all the good stuff i took to me about me. not for sure. but i do get the sense that you really really really do like me.

you told me yesterday that everyone is calling me your girlfriend. which, i have to tell you, i really did like.

i asked you how you felt about it, and you got shy and squirmy. which was also cute. and then you told me that you really liked how things were going.

so i said that i didn't need a label per say, (especially not so early on) but that i was probably gonna bring it up in a little bit of time, which you seemed to be pretty happy about.

so that made me very happy. i like this idea, i like that we are well on our way to being a couple. i like you. i like you so so much. you're so calm and unbothered by my chaos and so kind and sweet and aware. which i think comes from being someone who actually listens to people when they point out those things out.

i might show you these some day. all these posts that i have written about you.

maybe.

#personal