Romans 8:38-39

personal Christian blog - catering to my own Faith , but all are Welcome <3

[orthodoxadventure]

Can you please pray for me. I'm fixated on the idea that God wants me to punish myself for something bad that I did in the past and that I'm hurting myself by not punishing myself and that there is no way for God to undo that requirement, if it exists. I kind of mentioned this to my priest and he did not confirm my fears, but I still keep going in circles, I'm afraid that this requirement exists but I'm refusing it. I'm afraid that the fact that I'm thinking about it is a proof that these thoughts are from God. I'm afraid this is going to affect my health soon, I started getting anxiety hives (everyday for a month now) and I can barely focus on work (I work from home)

If you can, please pray for God to have mercy on me and to forgive me and to keep me grateful if He eases my worries 🙏🙏🙏 Thank you so much

Hello, I am sorry that you are struggling so much with this. What is important to understand is that when we sin, God calls us to repentance. That is, going to confession and following the advice of the Priest that absolves you. That is it. 'There is no way for God to undo that requirement' is purely the talk of anxiety. There is nothing outside of God's control, and there is no limitation on God.

I think you should speak to your doctor about your anxiety, because it is affecting your health here and now. This is already taking a toll on you, and you need to get that support from a doctor. I would also recommend reading into reassurance seeking in OCD. Whether you have OCD or not, I think this is particularly applicable here. And you should be able to find coping mechanisms that work for you.

This requirement you are worried about does not exist. And as difficult and hard that it may feel, you have to trust in that. When those feelings of there being a hidden requirement to punish yourself come into your head, you need to say "No" and ignore them. Do not try to confirm them and do not try to argue against them. Just say no, say a quick "Lord Jesus Christ Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner" and do your best to move on from those thoughts. If they come back, do the same thing again until they leave you alone. It is hard, and sometimes these thoughts will feel so overwhelming. But if you keep persisting in this, trust that they will go away. These thoughts purely come from a place of anxiety and distress, and have no basis in reality.

I will keep you in my prayers, and here is a prayer for your mental health that I think will be helpful:

O Master, Lord my God, in Whose hands is my destiny: Help me according to Thy mercy, and leave me not to perish in my transgressions, nor allow me to follow them who place desires of the flesh over those of the spirit. I am Thy creation; disdain not the work of Thy hands. Turn not away; be compassionate and humiliate me not, neither scorn me, O Lord, as I am weak. I have fled unto Thee as my Protector and God. Heal my soul, for I have sinned against Thee. Save me for Thy mercy's sake, for I have cleaved unto Thee from my youth; let me who seeks Thee not be put to shame by being rejected by Thee for mine unclean actions, unseemly thoughts, and unprofitable remembrances. Drive away from me every filthy thing and excess of evil. For Thou alone art holy, alone mighty, and alone immortal, in all things having unexcelled might, which, through Thee, is given to all that strive against the devil and the might of his armies. For unto Thee is due all glory, honor and worship: To the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit, now and ever, and unto ages of ages. Amen.

[hail-holy-queen]

You are the light of the world.

Christ did not say this to the perfect people who have everything together, neither to kings who hold power. Instead it is for the ordinary people.

The people who were confused, tired. The people who are struggling, no matter with what. The people who look at this divided, angry world and feel hopeless with how little they think they do.

Yet light doesn't fight, kick or yell at darkness for it to go away. By simply being there, darkness is shunned.

So, you needn't to save the world. You needn't to be some perfect robot. Shine where you are now, for God sees it, he cherishes it.

Let your light shine before others, no matter how insignificant you feel your light is.

[many-sparrows]

O sacred head now wounded, with grief and shame weighed down, now scornfully surrounded, with thorns thine only crown.

[orthodoxadventure]

For those who ask for my prayers, I entreat the Lord with tears: 'Lord, grant them Thy Holy Spirit, that through the Holy Spirit they may know Thee.'

Saint Silouan the Athonite by Archimandrite Sophrony of Essex

[orrnament]

“[The eucharist] rang with the music of bells, glowed with light, dissolved on the tongue into honeycomb or bloody flesh, and announced its presence, when profaned or secreted away, by leaving a trail of blood.”

— Caroline Walker Bynum, Holy Feast and Holy Fast: The Religious Significance of Food to Medieval Women

[luxangelae]

“The Firstborn of All Creation”

The cosmos flows from Christ's side, culminating in the Monstrance, the divine mystery of the Eucharist, through which we are invited to participate in holy union with Him 🌞

[orthodoxadventure]

When Christ comes to judge us, what will be the criterion of His judgement? The parable answers: love--not a mere humanitarian concern for abstract justice and the anonymous "poor," but concrete and personal love for the human person, any human person, that God makes me encounter in my life.

Great Lent: Journey to Pascha by Fr. Alexander Schmemann

[divinum-pacis]

April 2025: Bahia state, Brazil Catholics dressed in white sheets light candles as they take part in the Terno das Almas procession in Igatu, a small isolated town in the mountains of Chapada Diamantina national park. Terno das Almas is an ancient ritual that takes place every night during Holy Week when participants make a pilgrimage through various parts of the village, praying and singing for the souls of their dead Photograph: Antonello Veneri/AFP/Getty Images

[traumacatholic]

“The church’s social teaching tells everyone that the Christian religion does not have a merely horizontal meaning, or a merely spiritualized meaning that overlooks the wretchedness that surrounds it. It is a looking at God, and from God at one’s neighbour as a brother or sister, and an awareness that “whatever you did to one of these, you did to me.””

— Saint Oscar Romero

[ad-crucem]

“Daughter, embrace the Cross and for My sake look on all sweet things as bitter, and all bitter things as sweet, and so be certain that you will always be strong."

—Christ to St. Catherine of Siena

[inspiredbyjesuslove]

[helloparkerrose]

[daily-praise]

Todays Reflection:

The wind in North Dakota is a constant presence. It often directs how we live. For instance, high wind warnings occur to protect the public from property damage, power outages, travel hazards, and flying debris. These warnings occur from time to time. However, this not usually a problem. Yet, the wind blows. When I am home at Assumption Abbey sitting in my choir stall praying, I often hear the wind whistle as it moves between the double towers of the Abbey Church. Therefore, wind is part of nature and was present in our gospel today, but in two different ways.

First the wind acts here as a means that carries along with it the Holy Spirit such as we witness in the Song of Solomon chapter 4. Here the wind acts as a messenger, for it says, “Arise, north wind! Come, south wind! Blow upon my garden that its perfumes may spread abroad.” Here the wind carries the Holy Spirit who is our guide. For the Holy Spirt reminds us of God’s love and grace which allows our faith to grow.

Yet, there is another way in which the wind acts. For the wind acts like a force, that brings something into something such as in the Old Testament, passage dealing with the valley of dry bones in which Ezekiel is told to prophesy so that the four winds come and breathe into these slain that they may come to life.Here the wind brings life, which occurs upon the wind through the Holy Spirit, the very breath mentioned by the prophet Ezekiel. This is the same breath, we find in Genesis chapter 2, when God formed us out of clay, and blew into his new creation the breath of life. Therefore, the wind is a vehicle that carries the Holy Spirit who “make the image of Jesus fully alive in each person” as Jesus breaths upon his disciples giving them the gift of the Holy Spirit. [1]

This is true as well in the second element found in the first reading that of fire, which came in tongues that; rested upon each individual. For through fire a covenant occurs such as the covenant Abraham entered into with God so that Abraham could became the Father of a great nation as much as the disciples saw visibly in tongues of fire the Advocate that helped them begin the Church.

In addition, the element of fire establishes mission, such as the mission Moses received through a non-consuming burning bush. For Moses mission brought Gods chosen people out of Egypt. This is what the Advocate brought to the disciples as they remembered their mission to spread the Good News to all people.

So, in the Old Testament God is using wind and fire to either establish a covenant, send individuals on missions, or lead Individuals to promises made. The disciples of Jesus on this day received these three gifts through the messenger, which is the wind, for the disciples brought to the world the Kingdom of God through the Church, which Jesus established and sent forth. This all occurred because the disciples recognized and accepted the gift of the Holy Spirit.

This is true of us as well, for God is trying his best to get our attention, despite the distractions of the world, to acknowledge and accept the Holy Spirit in our lives. Therefore, maybe on the next windy day, (or any day) let us remember that the Holy Spirit has come to guide us, and if we can do this, then we too will live lives that are more virtuous which helps others grow closer to God.

[1] https://www.simplycatholic.com/why-the-holy-spirit-matters/#:~:text=The%20Holy%20Spirit%20teaches%20us,through%20faith%2C%20hope%20and%20love.

Image: Detail from a fresco at the Karlskirche in Vienna.

Today’s Spiritual Links for May 24, 2026

National Eucharistic Review Today’s Mass Readings Today’s Reflection Rosary Liturgy of the Hours New American Bible Non-Scriptural Reading Prime Matters

[inspiredbyjesuslove]

[lionofchaeronea]

Title: Pentecost, aka Descent of the Holy Spirit (panel from the Pruszcz Polyptych) Artist: Colijn de Coter (Flemish, fl. ca. 1493-1506) Date: ca. 1500 Genre: religious art (Roman Catholic Christianity) Period: Northern Renaissance Movement: Early Netherlandish Medium: tempera on panel Dimensions: 164 cm (64.5 in) high x 73 cm (28.7 in) wide Location: National Museum in Warsaw, Poland

Colijn de Coter, also known as Colijn van Brusele (Colin of Brussels), specialized in altarpieces. His style was influenced by Roger van der Weyden, and de Coter in his turn was influential on Early Netherlandish art through his large, successful workshop.

[divineprisoner]

How wonderful would it be to die and see that Judas made it to the pearly gates. I intend to offer prayers of mercy and intercession on his behalf. I think of all human souls in history, Judas probably needs the most and yet receives the least.

[divineprisoner]

After speaking with a priest and deacon a bit more about this...

Here are some interpretations for Judas not being a total "loss cause":

"Although the Church does not have a special devotional to Judas, there are many Church approved writings by Saints and others that suggest that Judas deserves our prayers in case he did in fact make it to purgatory. Because we do not know the disposition of Judas' soul, it is not appropriate to have a formal acknowledgment of his actions. However, there is a book (title and author of course slips my mind) about being merciful as the Father is merciful in which Judas' legacy is examined and it is offered that to pray for him and his acceptance into the heaven is the ultimate test of our willingness to offer mercy to someone who does not deserve it. Of course, the point is that none of us deserve mercy. That's what make it mercy."

"God is in all places, even Hell. However, Thomas Aquinas argues that when Jesus descended into hell (not hell) it was to share his saving grace with those who were faithfully awaiting the coming of the Messiah and the saving grace he brings. Judas experienced the Messiah personally and so if he rejected him, then he would not be in the Jewish land of the dead, but in true hell. A place from which Jesus tells us God will not rescue you. But, we do not know the true motives of Judas. The best we can offer, assuming God did not remove his free will, is that he believed his plan was better than God's and when he realized it wasn't, the damage was done and his despair was complete and all consuming. It is a good practice to not judge Judas as being either in hell or heaven, but to pray for him as someone who might be in purgatory who has no one left to offer prayers for him. It is a worthy exercise in our own expression of hope."

"I should also point out that St. Tomas used theology and Scripture to argue that Judas is a lost soul and is in hell. He did not declare it as personal revelation, but simply a logical deduction based on Church dogma and Scripture. You need to remember that "as if you were never born" in Jesus time meant that you never existed. Never existed. This is different than how we interpret that saying. So, Jesus isn't saying, you could have been in heaven if you died in the womb because the unborn are innocent. He is saying it is would have been better if you had never existed: that God had never united your body and soul as one being."

"Our prayers are meant to transform us as well as (and maybe more than) accomplish what we are praying for. If by praying for a "lost cause" like Judas transforms your heart so you are more merciful to those who are not yet a "lost cause" then your prayers are powerful indeed. If your prayers for Judas allow you to let go and allow God to be the judge of who is and who isn't in either hell or heaven, then they are obeying Jesus. The prayers of a righteous person are always effective. Just not always in the direction we point the prayer."

"Also: the only real assumption St. Thomas made is that Judas died in mortal sin. We cannot know if he repented and was forgiven in the time between the rope pulling tight and when he died. He had at least 4 minutes to pray to God. That is an eternity for a God who sees "a second as a 1000 years." The other points he makes are just statements on Scripture and dogma."

"Maybe Jesus' "harsh words" were not a condemnation but a warning to Judas to repent. Not to tell him to not do what he was going to do. Obviously Jesus knew that Judas was going to betray him: "go and do what you have to do." But maybe those harsh words were the warning that the ultimate betrayal is to betray his teaching on the mercy and love of the God the Father. It would be better that he not be born if he does not repent."

"I think the real danger is to make sure we do not raise Judas to the level of hero. He heroically risked condemnation to Hell in order to fulfill God's plan is an agument I have heard many people speak. Judas is the victim of God's plan as he was chosen to be the one who would betray him. We come dangerously close to that when we call the disobedience in the Garden of Eden as an "Oh happy accident." It is true without their original sin, the saving grace of God through his Son Jesus would not have had to happen. But, they had free will and chose to disobey God and it is through God's mercy that he turned that evil act into good. And yes, we believe Adam and Eve are in heaven, but we also believe that they accepted the punishment of being driven from the Garden and lived a life of faith and repentance afterwards."

All quotes from my clergy. Some interesting ideas to contemplate, and hopefully it may inspire us in our prayers, whether those prayers be for Judas, ourselves, for those who are lost and still living, or for those whom no one prays for in Purgatory.

[theoakings]

Don’t let shame distract you from the immense love Jesus has for you! He loves you so much! More than you could ever imagine. Nothing you could do or have done could ever separate you from His love!💗💫