Almost Inactive

Haven’t done discourse since 2018, this is just an archive lol

[lovingthediscourse]

To everyone who is somehow still arguing about ace discourse in the year 2019 (BOTH SIDES)

Please go outside

[im-fucking-asexual]

but I already am outside a lot 🤔

[lovingthediscourse]

Clearly not enough

[lovingthediscourse]

To everyone who is somehow still arguing about ace discourse in the year 2019 (BOTH SIDES)

Please go outside

[discoursesurveys]

2019 Ace/Aro Discourse Survey

So I made an ace/aro discourse survey and I would appreciate if people from all sides could share and take it. I will be sharing the results here (probably once 1,000 responses and then at different intervals from there.)

This survey will ask about your opinions on ace discourse and aro discourse. It will also ask demographic questions and questions about other areas of community discourse. This survey should take you about 5-7 minutes.

This is an independently conducted survey done for personal and public interest, but not associated with any research group. This is in no way shape or form to make any decisions about if aces or aros should be included or excluded. Please do not use the survey in any direction for that purpose.

You do not need to be ace, aro, or in the LGBT/LGBTQ+/Queer/MOGAI/QUILTBAG communities to take this poll. The general findings of this survey are not intended to make absolute decisions but to simply gather data.

Please share this, and if you have an issue with it or have things that need added/removed, please share them either in the inbox or in the suggestions box at the end of the survey. I intend to make another survey next year so your suggestions will be in mind.

Survey Link

[lovingthediscourse]

Honestly at this point seeing grey/white/purple together activates my fight or flight response

[mukhannath]

[lovingthediscourse]

You are honest to god one of the most embarrassing people involved in the discourse you are the exact strawman of the inclusionist

[mukhannath]

[lovingthediscourse]

Holy fuck they got me ladies and gents I’m gonna delete now

[mukhannath]

[thatsabood]

Imagine feeling so threatened by someone’s sexuality that certain colors freak you out

[lovingthediscourse]

Imagine having a Dan and Phil blog in 2017

[thatsabood]

Imagine making fun of someone’s blog type when you have a blog dedicated to discrediting someone’s sexuality

[lovingthediscourse]

Literally my blog isn’t to “discredit” asexually it’s to keep cishets out of the lgbt community. Asexuality is real it just isn’t inherently LGBT.

[theoutli3r]

yeah well, the purple, white and gray flag that activates your fight or flight response belongs to all asexuals, not just the heteroromantic ones, so if you aren’t trying to “discredit” asexuality (or the types of asexuals who you consider to be LGBT+) maybe walk your initial statement back a few steps

[lovingthediscourse]

It was a joke homie it was a joke about how the ace flag now automatically means discourse and discourse nowadays is just annoying it was a JOKE

[theoutli3r]

oh ya don’t say!! I would have never guessed!!

y’know personally I love it when ppl make fun of one of my pride flags for the sake of discourse, it’s a totally respectful and not-shitty thing to do har har har

[animefacialrecognitionsoftware01]

“automatically means discourse”

WHOSE FUCKING FAULT IS THAT, DUMBASS?????

NOBODY GAVE A SHIT ABT ACE PPL EXISTING UNTIL U FUCKWADS DECIDED TO START PICKING APART THEIR ORIENTATION AND NEVER STOPPED

THEIR FLAG SHOULDN’T AUTOMATICALLY MEAN DISCOURSE MAN!! IT’S FUCKED UP THAT U GUYS DID THAT, THEIR FLAG SHOULDN’T MEAN ANYTHING MORE THAN SOMETHING THAT REPRESENTS THEIR ORIENTATION

[scattereda]

God thank you these exclusies fucks will make fun of every part of ace ppls orientation and then complain that anything related to aceness means discourse now they are so fucking unselfaware it’s amazing

[animefacialrecognitionsoftware01]

Nothing makes me shit more than some dipshit exclusie posting something like “I BETTER NOT SEE ANY ACE DISCOURSE THIS PRIDE IM SO TIRED YALL” like it aint their fucking fault it even exists in the first place

ay maybe if u hadnt spent 5 years calling aceys incels and indirectly calling their orientation pedophilic and nsfw there wouldn’t BE ANY FUCKING ACE DISCOURSE DURING PRIDE HUH DUMBASS

I MEAN HOLY SHIT DUDE

[lovingthediscourse]

Y’all are really getting mad at a post that I made literal years ago huh? On my blog that isn’t even active anymore? Imagine caring about ace discourse in 2019 lmao couldn’t be me

[lovingthediscourse]

Calling yourself WLW: good

Calling yourself MLM: okay

Calling yourself MLW/WLM: pure unadulterated evil

[transmed-and-pissed]

OP literally wtf

[lovingthediscourse]

Hi! I made this badly-worded post in 2015. When I was fifteen years old.

Also, hi! I’m bisexual! I was aware of that when I made the post! I understand that it’s worded confusingly but I’m not shitting on bisexuals bc. I am one lol

[discoursenoodle]

hey inclusionists

if homoromantic asexuals are still gay or lesbians and biromantic asexuals are still bi then why aren’t heteroromantic asexuals straight?

[leavesandash]

Because exclusionists don’t stop at calling a heteroromantic asexual straight.

It starts as straight, and then morphs half-way through a paragraph into “cishet”. The two terms are then treated as synonymous. And then they say no one wants cishets in the LGBTQI+ community, do they? Completely ignoring that “cishet” doesn’t cover everything.

So that is why I, an inclusionist, will not call axesual people “straight”. Because even if you, OP, don’t twist it into cishet, there are plenty of exclusionists who will.

[discourseful]

if someone is cis and het they’re fucking cishet. that’s how it works.

[leavesandash]

The term “cishet” ignores (some) intersex people and asexuals. Or more specifically, the way it’s used ignores them. It’s not a neutral term - people use it as the reason to exclude people from the LGBTQI+ community.

But some people are cisgender, heteroromantic, perisex, and asexual. Some people are cisgender, heterosexual, heteromantic, and intersex. You could call them cishet, but they are part of the LGBTQI+ community.

So perhaps my previous post wasn’t explicit enough. I will not call asexual people straight because some exclusionists will then turn it into cishet which they will then use to try and exclude asexuals from the community.

[discourseful]

the term cishet exists to give a label to the community-wide oppressors of all lgbt people. it labels cis and het people as cishet.

intersex people can be cis. ace people can be cis and het while being ace.

not labeling people who are cis and straight as cishet and flat out refusing to recognize that as a label doesn’t make you a Good Inclusionist, it just means you’re denying other lgbt people the ability to label their oppressors, and you sound ridiculous. people who are cis and only attracted to the opposite binary gender are cishet. be honest about who you’re trying to include in the community.

[thebackrooms-moved-deactivated2]

tiktok makers on my porch dressed as catgirls: *making ahegao faces and moaning loudly* me: *runs out with a shotgun and shoots up at the air as a warning shot* GIT OUTTA HEARE YA DAMN TIKTOKERS! GIT! tiktok catgirls: *get on all fours and run like deer into the woods*

[aromantic-and-heartless]

A-spec Exclusion from LGBTQIA+ Spaces

I’m so done with that BS exclusionists say about “real life LGBT spaces” not wanting asexual or aromantic people there. Cuz it ain’t true. I’m very new at interacting in those “real” spaces since I’m from a small town in the Southern countryside. I just started college so I have more freedom. I have yet to see or hear any kind of exclusion of a-spec people. 

I joined a queer club at the beginning of the school year and some people introduced themselves and their orientation. There wasn’t a “you can’t be here” when someone said they were asexual. Just a couple weeks ago the club celebrated asexuality awareness week and intersex awareness day by watching videos explaining both and having a discussion. The only time there was any disagreement about what belongs in the club was when we wanted to watch Mean Girls instead of doing a game… 

Our current club name does not include trans but does include allies, and we’ve already started working on how that needs to change. Ya know what, we’re thinking something along the lines of “spectrum” ( that word that a-specs supposedly “appropriated”… from the dictionary I guess?). Instead of trying to make a really long or exclusive acronym. And *gasp* we can say the word queer! and the president uses gay as an umbrella term all the fucking time. People respect they/them and neo pronouns and nonbinary identities, there’s no “fake trans” excuse to exclude nonbinary people. We also don’t start shit between bisexual and pansexual people.

And if any exclusionists have more arguments such as “we don’t want our literal cishet oppressors in LGBT safe spaces” we have literal cisgender straight allies in the spaces all the damn time. The more people the better according to the boss gay.

[discourseful]

school groups literally aren’t allowed to exclude anyone who wants to join lol

[traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns]

Hahahaha

Originally posted on /r/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns

[tealnightmare]

“I had a dick, cut it off, and now have a strap on of my exact dick shape

BUT IM NOT A MAN HOW DARE U MISGENDER ME”

[lovingthediscourse]

Watching TERFs in the wild is so fascinating like I can’t decide if they genuinely don’t know what a joke is or if they’re pretending (probably the case)

[lovingthediscourse]

Calling yourself WLW: good

Calling yourself MLM: okay

Calling yourself MLW/WLM: pure unadulterated evil

[lifeofcynch]

why is that bad? women can love men too, and men can love women. it’s not evil to be straight or bi or pan, you know.

[hsjdjcjebgakdj-deactivated20220]

i think they meant as in using that term

[lovingthediscourse]

Yes that is exactly what I meant IN 2015 WHEN I MADE THIS POST WHEN I WAS 15. Thank you for having some common sense and actually reading the post.

[marshmaello]

yeah man, thanks for agreeing with my own personal opinion, you must have common sense for coming to the same conclusion as me :)

[lovingthediscourse]

Why is this post the one of mine that has wracked up the most people who don’t know how to read

[marshmaello]

????

I’m sorry, what exactly am I supposed to make of this lmao

[lovingthediscourse]

I made an easily misinterpretable post when I was 15 and people misinterpreted it. I was making a point that was relevant in the discourse a while back. People read it outside of the context and came to the conclusion that I, a bisexual, hate bisexual people. Someone finally correctly interpreted it, and I was confirming that they correctly interpreted it. You joined the ranks of people that misinterpreted this post, like three years later. I don’t care if they agree with me or not, I was just glad that someone realized what I was actually saying.

[lovingthediscourse]

Calling yourself WLW: good

Calling yourself MLM: okay

Calling yourself MLW/WLM: pure unadulterated evil

[lifeofcynch]

why is that bad? women can love men too, and men can love women. it’s not evil to be straight or bi or pan, you know.

[hsjdjcjebgakdj-deactivated20220]

i think they meant as in using that term

[lovingthediscourse]

Yes that is exactly what I meant IN 2015 WHEN I MADE THIS POST WHEN I WAS 15. Thank you for having some common sense and actually reading the post.

[marshmaello]

yeah man, thanks for agreeing with my own personal opinion, you must have common sense for coming to the same conclusion as me :)

[lovingthediscourse]

Why is this post the one of mine that has wracked up the most people who don’t know how to read

[lovingthediscourse]

Calling yourself WLW: good

Calling yourself MLM: okay

Calling yourself MLW/WLM: pure unadulterated evil

[lifeofcynch]

why is that bad? women can love men too, and men can love women. it’s not evil to be straight or bi or pan, you know.

[hsjdjcjebgakdj-deactivated20220]

i think they meant as in using that term

[lovingthediscourse]

Yes that is exactly what I meant IN 2015 WHEN I MADE THIS POST WHEN I WAS 15. Thank you for having some common sense and actually reading the post.

[lovingthediscourse]

This is why Tumblr needs time stamps on their posts and why people should read my god damn bio before accusing me of being some vicious bisexual hater

[lovingthediscourse]

Calling yourself WLW: good

Calling yourself MLM: okay

Calling yourself MLW/WLM: pure unadulterated evil

[lifeofcynch]

why is that bad? women can love men too, and men can love women. it’s not evil to be straight or bi or pan, you know.

[lovingthediscourse]

Okay. I made this post in 2015. Three fuckin years ago. I was 15 years old. And maybe I didn’t say it as gracefully as I could have, but what the post is saying is that straight people shouldn’t co-opt LGBT terms. That’s it. And, get this, I’m literally bisexual. I’m a bisexual man dating a girl. I know it’s okay for men and women to date.

[heterophobiclesbean]

Hey gay men I have a question what do you generally look at to figure out if a girl is a lesbian (if you ever even try to figure it out at all) because I feel like every time I try to bond with an Out Gay Man he assumes I’m a Straight Girl who wants a Gay Best Friend and I cant just be like “I’m a lesbian” like how do yall know when a girl is gay I need more gay/lesbian solidarity in my life and I dont know any fucking lesbians but I know quite a few gay men and I wanna be friends and bond over our lack of heterosexuality

[cismisandrist-hate-crimes]

usually hair!! rad haircuts or dyed hair!! and anything rainbow/explicitly wlw ofc

[heterophobiclesbean]

Ugh my hair is the most heterosexual looking thing about me

[whitehairedanimeboyfriend]

Hair, clothes, the Vibe. Its hard to explain exactly. If all else fails or doesn’t jump out at me, placement of piercings. I don’t know a single straight girl with a septum piercing. If I ever even get a small inkling I casually bring up gayness.

[heterophobiclesbean]

I have thought abt the septum piercing tbh but I already have a nostril and I’m not sure how I feel abt the septum on my face tbh. I do have very asymmetrical piercings tho and I do want more so

[lovingthediscourse]

Gay people and especially gay AFAB people have a specific brand of humor and way of speaking so I can pretty much figure it out by talking to them? It’s just a vibe I get.

[marxpussy-deactivated20180726]

Unpopular opinion but “queer” isn’t an identity in itself if you’re not also a lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans, pansexual, or nonbinary person. Your identity can’t just be “queer”, unless you’re nonbinary and the only way you feel comfortable describing your gender is as genderqueer.

[lesbeans-on-toast]

i have no issue with someone personally reclaiming the term but when people act like its flat out wrong to acknowledge that they do, inevitably, fit the definition of gay/bi/trans/pan/nb it makes me feel like the urge to use queer as their core/only identity is due to stigma surrounding the other terms

[rotterteen-remaking]

some creep on here: ACTUALLY, a grown ass adult/24 yr old going after an adolescent/barely 17 yr old isnt predatory or pedophilia technically, because-

me: