"I can feel it, clawing behind my eyes. Begging to make me feel whole again. It tells me that I need to go somewhere, find something. I don't know to what ends, all I know is that I have to find out why he needs me..." - ???
A/N: Hello! My name is Goth (main acc @gothic-illustrations). My goal is to have around ten people's oc's as well as one of my own staring in it! I'm trying to keep things small for now, as I am only one person.
Lucid Agony is a collaborative AU and In-development visual novel centered around psychological horror, found family, futility, and the consequences of one's actions.
It's normal for people to share certain aspects of dreams, for symbols to show up that people can ascribe meaning to. But when eleven people dream of the same tall figure with a swarm of crows surrounding him called the Missionary, it seems too strange to ignore.
So they all turn to the internet in hopes of easily their shared anxiety. A forum about lucid dreaming, and a link to a group chat simple labeled Lucid Agony.
What they all thought was a simple-shared dream turns into a journey to find each other and a test of individual resolve as they are forced to reckon with past mistakes that can never be undone, that threaten to ripe them apart before they've even started.
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This AU will be open as soon as I make the How to Join Page and Ref Sheet guide!
I really enjoyed the Lexi piece I did, like this, so I decided to do it again with one of my own ocs! Specifically in her original Au that I made for her! But this can also be seen as her pre joining the flock.
Elaine doesn't have a lot of pictures from her youth, but she does have many from her old shows. She just can't seem to stop her peers from rummaging through her stuff and finding it.
I may do this with more people's ocs in the future, so stay tuned...
Just as a small update, Lucid Agony is still open to join! We also have a discord server. So, fill free to message me if you want to join while you make your oc.
I have a lot more prompts in the works, and so much other stuff bouncing around in my head.
My dms here and on discord are always open to any and all questions about this au!
A/N: Prologue timeeeee, thanks to jun for the proofreading! Characters mentioned are from @5yrsb4, @ruinsversearchive, @xxurc4rr0ts4r3m1n3xx, and @artsartblog!
TW: Needles, medical malpractice, animal death, implied human death.
No matter what she does, every dream always starts the same way— with Elaine running through the woods and the sounds of screaming. She's left to blindly follow the deafening cries of something, or someone, she can never seem to recognize. The putrid smell of rotten flesh and damp leaves lingers behind her like a curse, and by the time she gets there, she's always too late.
This time, a small doe lies in a clearing, ripped to shreds and laid before her, a look of shock plastered across its maggot-ridden face. It didn't know it was going to die here, and certainly not like this.
If she looks hard enough, she swears she saw her own eyes where the deer's glossy, lifeless ones are. Normally, she would look behind her to find that thing, and the dream would end— but for once, she decides to change course. In some false hope that it would make things better, that it would ease the inevitable, Elaine kneels before the doe and picks its limp head up, setting it gently on her lap. Cold blood seeps into the fabric of her jeans, leaving the saccharine smell to linger on her person. She brings a hand up to gingerly shut the creature's eyes, to give it some relief.
But even that doesn't seem to last, as she feels the cold steel of a gun against her temple.
Elaine turns her head to meet the gaze of her assailant, only to be met with the same, ever-shifting form. It stands before her with a wicked smirk on its face, striking purple eyes glaring down at her. It almost seems amused at her attempt to change the narrative, to change how this nightmare dream will end.
“Relax, Lainey. This is just gonna hurt. A lot.”
And with the flash of the barrel and a ringing sound in her ears, she wakes.
“HAINAULT! MY OFFICE. NOW!”
Elaine takes a moment to realize where she is, and what exactly she's doing. But eventually she looks down to see the IV needle sticking out of her patient's arm at an odd angle, multiple angry bruises running up their arm.
It happened again.
Why did it have to keep happening?
Why did it even happen once?
God forbid thirty-seven.
She props herself up on the edge of the gurney and walks out of the room, mumbling a small goodbye to her patient as she does so. She trails behind her supervisor, who's staring her down like a hawk. When they reach his office, Elaine can already tell this isn't going to end well. The hospital's head of staff and a lawyer are set in chairs with papers held in their hands. Their words bleed together into a mess of legal jargon and work niceties. The only thing that stands out is her supervisor's voice, cutting right to the chase without leaving her a moment to wake properly.
“Ms. Hainault, I can understand one instance of falling asleep on your feet. But this has gotten out of hand. When you were recommended by your professors and previous employers, they said you were the best nurse they had known. I'm starting to regret my choice now. You're terminated, effective immediately. You have the papers outlining your termination plan.”
“Just sign them, and we can part ways without any more strife, or bruised limbs.”
Elaine doesn't take a moment to think or explain. The only place that would get her is a referral to the psych ward and a personal escort there. So she signs without reading the jumbled mess of words in front of her and gets up.
“I apologize for my ineptitude, sir. Goodbye.”
By the time she gets home, she's already about to fall asleep again. She reaches into her fridge to find another cold energy drink waiting for her. It won't exactly keep her awake, but it's the only thing she has, so she downs the fizzy drink and walks into her bedroom, where her clunky old laptop sits already opened and waiting for her.
xXdrowsy_doeXx: Hey
hal45×200: Hey, you're back from work early?
xXdrowsy_doeXx: yeah, helps that they fired me today
hal45×200: shit.
hal45×200: still having trouble sleeping?
xXdrowsy_doeXx: yeah, getting sick of it too.
hal45×200: I wouldn't blame you.
xXdrowsy_doeXx: I have considered spending that emergency money on something, though.
hal45×200: what?
xXdrowsy_doeXx: A large ass transit van and a rifle
hal45×200: please tell me you're joking, El
xXdrowsy_doeXx: nope.
xXdrowsy_doeXx: [link no longer active]
hal45×200: do I want to ask why?
xXdrowsy_doeXx: call me stupid, but I need to find out what this thing is, and I need to end it. Now.
hal45×200: Stupid
xXdrowsy_doeXx: Huh?
hal45×200: You said to call you stupid, so I am.
xXdrowsy_doeXx: That's… fair actually
xXdrowsy_doeXx: You know that idea I had? For the chatroom?
hal45×200: Yep
xXdrowsy_doeXx: I think I want to do that too. It might help… to know we aren't alone in this bullshit.
hal45×200: That sounds less stupid
xXdrowsy_doeXx: I'll take that as a yes then
[xXdrowsy_doeXx is offline]
Elaine leans back in her chair, staring up at the patterns in her old popcorn ceiling, and sighs. Her fingers hover over another tab for a small shitty website she made using a free web hosting service she found and her toddler levels of coding, in some desperate hope at meeting others who dealt with the same things that had been plaguing her. She was hesitant at first, that it would be seen as a hoax or some weird prank, like that one site she found for custom-shaped kittens.
But now? It was sounding less stupid. More like a lifeline. So she decides to click on the button at the bottom of the tab.
[Lucidagony.com is now LIVE]
[xXdrowsy_doeXx is online]
[hal45×200 is online]
[Mus1c4lK1tt3n is online]
[gl00my_nevermore is online]
[xX_UrC4rr0ts4r3M1n3_Xx is online]
xXdrowsy_doeXx: Damn, that was quick… welcome to Lucid Agony…
The Missionary often takes form of Eve but wrong. Her face is empty and cruel, her clothes are too pristine yet bloodied, her arms are petite yet tear apart the strongest of men.
On the rare occasion, it appears as Mira luring her into unsafe environments or trying to corrupt her.
How does Eve interact with it?
Eve often cannot move as she watches the Missionary her face mutilate patients or purposely hurt innocents to point of hospitalized only to continue to maim them. These patients and/or people tend to be loved or children and teens Eve has cared for.
When the missionary takes form of Mira, Eve refuses to follow and states what an awful person Mira is. Sometimes she even hurts Mira.
Sometimes it will just chases her through a ruined hospital as her doppelganger or Mira.
"What does the Missionary look like to your character?"
For Grace, the Missionary will take on many forms - usually people that have caused a negative emotional spike - that have been misshaped or taken a monstrous form. Though, he commonly will appear to her as the one person that has caused her to nearly react without thinking - a person that betrayed her trust and is the source for where her worst fear comes from - Beth Majors.
Not only does the Missionary take on the form of Beth, the form has been altered to reflect how Grace sees Beth - a monstrous being that easily camouflages itself as a pretty lady with small hints of what truly lies beneath the surface. The form isn't the only thing that the Missionary does, his voice sounds like Beth, but distorted. Almost as if it's being filtered through static that's pulling from memories of her voice.
"And how have they interacted with him?"
Most of the time Grace tries to ignore him, act like he isn't there. Other times she yells at him - saying everything she wishes she could say to the real Beth, but knows not to since it'll just cause more problems than need be - or is frozen in fear as she realizes that it isn't really Beth. When she's stuck, unable to move or even think of a way to escape him, he will just repeat lines of things Beth has said to her or string along new sentences that could easily be said by Beth. Once the words have caused her anger to consume her, she screams all of her frustration out. Which would normally feel cathartic, but it only ever feels like she's doing exactly what he wants within her dreams.
There are times where she zones out and just daydreams that she hears the distorted voice of Beth - more staticky than sounding like Beth - which will influence her daydreams and cause her to mumble to herself. She can get stuck in this daze whenever she's alone until a strong enough emotion breaks her free (mostly anger), but if she's around others or hears a loud enough voice then she can be brought out of her mind away from the Missionary's grasp.
"Why so tense songbird? Cat got your tongue."
"Haha!"
I was rattling this around in my mind since it was posted and finally came to a conclusion on what I was going to do. Hopefully it fits.
I just really liked the idea of the Missionary appearing as Beth to Grace, but I wanted to kind of distort it to reflect how Grace now views Beth along with influence from the Missionary. Also I wanted to lean more into the fact that Grace does have some underlying anger issues, but they're kind of justified(?) since Beth did cause Grace to (temporarily) die and lose her memories then pull a "prank" on Grace by having her (Beth's) boyfriend pretend to date Grace so...yeah.
I instantly knew what kind of outfit to give Beth because she just seems like the kind of girl to wear as revealing of clothes as she can in the most early 2000s way - like real mean girl type shit lol
since lucid agony is also going to be a visual novel, im curious, who will we be playing as? is there already a storyline in mind (for the none vn aspects of the au, that will influence or inspire the vn) or is it a collaborative effort?
while i wont personally be joining, the premise does have me hooked :]
Hi hi! For the visual novel question. I plan to switch whichever character you play as depending on story beats. So, if a certain arc is based around a character or characters, you get to see it from their point of view. As well as a view into their inner thoughts in said situations.
As for the storyline, I want to make it more collaborative. I have a few broad story ideas, and my own characters arc planned out. But I want to let people have a say in things that happen.
I have a whole portion of my design document just dedicated to the symbolism and themes I want to add to this au. And I will bring it up to people as it applies to the stories they wish to tell.
The non-vn aspects are meant to flesh out of the characters and help influence certain story beats.
In general, many things are up in the air just because this au is still so new. But things will be fleshed out as more people join, and more story beats get added.
It's good to know that even if people don't join, they will still watch this fun project play out! Thank you for the ask!!
The Missionary is a being forever restricted to the realm of dreams and the mind. Never able to take physical form, so how does one even being to imagine the unimaginable? Does he take the form of a friend, a foe, or your worst nightmare....
Your task:
What does the Missionary look like to your character? And how have they interacted with him?
Have fun, little agonized souls. You'll be hearing from me again soon.
"Honestly I don't mind these lot, it's nice to be distracted from life and they help sometimes"
-gl00my_nevermore- ( @ruinsversearchive )
"It's easier to talk to her, no sugar coating, no making sure I don't upset anyone. She's pretty chill, though I can respect her ability to bounce my jabs right back at me"
Robbie actually enjoys talking to someone who bounces off his personality (he also enjoys how she hasn't been afraid to match his personality no matter the mood he's in or how snappy he may get.) he'd of course invite her out to get McDonald's at 3am (mans LOVES his late night drives) but he'd rather it not be taken the wrong way.
xXdrowsy-doeXx ( @lucid-agony )
"She's nice- i once made a joke about getting hurt to see her at work after I found out she was an ambo and she said if I did she'd make it worse before it was better- without losing her job"
He later found out after saying it that's Elaine was a ER nurse and not an EMT. He felt absolutely stupid. Elaine makes him feel happy about joining the group, it's like having that one friend who you know no matter how much you joke with that things will be okay :) (though he's sure that's how she makes everyone feel), he's happy to know her.
Mus1c4lK1tt3n ( @artsartblog )
"Yeah she's pretty cool- we talk about horror movies and such, been trying to convince the group to do a big Meetup to watch the new saw movie."
Robbie is rather comforted by talking to grace. It's not in a weird way like he likes her (especially because of the fact that she's 7 years younger, but also because he's not sure if he's ready for that with ANYONE), but more so he kind of sees her as a little sister. He views grace as the baby of the group, occasionally making jabs about such and jokes like "we shouldn't be cursing/talking about _____, Grace isn't old enough yet." He thinks of her not just as someone he can confide in but also a friend and he hopes it's the same for her.
hal45x200( @5yrsb4 )
"I've invited him to get macca's with me a few times, maybe he just doesn't like the fake shit in it"
He wants to get to know Hal more, though granted Robbie hasn't been putting in any hard effort either. He understands that it's hard to trust others (though he never exactly understood the reason why Hal doesn't) and just hopes one day hal can find it in himself or even that Robbie can prove to be someone who can be trusted. Maybe next time he'll ask if Hal wants to crack open a cold one and talk about life (that's what guys in their 30's do, right?)
"Maybe one of these days we can all take a break and get lunch, catch up, maybe forget about all the bad shit"
Job: currently he's a full time college student studying agriculture, the tuition is low enough and he has enough scholarship grants that he lives off of whats left. He also works a part time (weekends only) job at the Cafe on campus. He hates it. He ended up going back to college after a bad break up
Username: xX_UrC4rr0ts4r3M1n3_Xx
Personality: when Robbie is close to someone he tends to have meaner jabs towards his friends (though they're in good fun and he's fine with jabs being made in return, stopping if he's ever told to and never revisiting that joke). He's the kind of guy to call a girl (or a guy) attractive but he too scared to initiate anything, much less be in a relationship. When he's around people he doesn't know he tends to be quieter and calmer (more so in the way that he'd rather not create problems with someone he doesn't know), he'll respond when spoken too but rarely starts a conversation.
Worst Fear: when someone asks him for his worst fear he tends to want to say "Being in love and committing to someone only for them to leave me without giving me any reasons and I'm left alone after giving them his all" but he doesn't know how to articulate that so he says trypanophobia(shots/injections)
Backstory: Robbie grew up in Sydney Australia, though has barely any notable memories there. His father left after Robbie turned 5 saying "I can't handle a problematic child"(tbf he was a little shit) leaving his mother to raise him. She's a bad bitch tho so she didn't need a man. In his Senior year he moved to America with his mother where he met a beautiful young girl named Mihira (or Mimi)
They stayed together for a few years, though things ended between Robbie and Mihira when he was only 25 after they had different ideas of how to spend the rest of their lives. (He wanted to settle down and get married, she wanted to explore the world more and wasn't ready for marriage due to issues with her family). They're still friends, but Robbie took the breakup badly and moved back home to live with his aunt before promptly moving back to the US to go back to college for agriculture (having unused scholarships and save up money)
Personality: Harlan “Hal” Davidson is a quiet man who learned long ago to survive by keeping his head down and his hands busy. Outwardly, he is polite, reserved, and relentlessly practical. He believes actions speak louder than words and is the time of person who would help you fix a tractor without expecting thanks. Hal doesn’t trust easily, not others and not himself, and fills silence with work rather than words. He clings to routine and old sayings, the language of sermons and fieldwork, as though they can make sense of the things he can’t.
Worst fear: Absolute loss of self. Being forgotten.
Hal was raised on a fourth-generation family farm. His father was a hard, stoic man; devout in the sort of way that mixed religion with punishment. His mother was quiet and anxious, always quoting scripture to soothe herself after her husband’s rages.
Every night before bed, Hal had to kneel with his father and recite prayers, confessing “sins” that were sometimes just childish mistakes like leaving the gate open, dropping a tool, speaking too softly in church. His father called it “cleansing,” but to Hal, it felt like a private trial each night before God.
As a boy, Hal was quiet and compliant, a middle child who rarely cried or asked questions. He wanted to do what was right, but “right” always seemed to mean obedience, silence, and endurance. When a trusted church elder crossed boundaries with him during his early adolescence, Harlan didn’t have the words or safety to name it. The experience left him with a quiet conviction that pain was the price of being loved, that closeness always came with danger. He never told anyone, burying it under the weight of shame.
When Hal was 15, his father died in a tractor accident. The town pastor called it “God’s will,” but Hal secretly thought God had killed him, and that terrified him more than anything. He began having vivid nightmares, nightmares of watching his own body walk away without him.
He left home at eighteen to enlist, looking for order, purpose. He became a sapper in the SFOR. The military gave him both structure and chaos. He saw death up close, smelled it, and carried it back with him. The constant threat of IEDs, the sight of mass graves, and the weight of his comrades’ safety as a combat engineer shattered his nerves. After discharge, he came home different… the smell of diesel snapped him back to places he didn’t talk about. Nights were spent staring at the ceiling, jaw locked, heart racing at every creak. He tried to settle back into farm life, but the fields seemed vaster, the church sermons emptier, and the nightmares only grew more frequent. The church pews still smelled the same but he couldn’t sit through a service without his hands trembling. People called it nerves, but the truth was that Hal couldn’t tell where his guilt ended and his faith began.
The nightmares, once fleeting, eventually started to become more vivid. He would dream of walking through fields, the soil beneath his feet soaked in blood that was not his own. He’d wake with his heart hammering against his ribs, his body aching as if he’d truly been running all night. The line between memory and dream vanished entirely, leaving him in a constant state of exhausting, hypervigilant dread. When he heard Elaine had created a forum, something that named the specific, surreal horror of his nights, he created a username and typed his first, tentative post into the void, a digital confession in a new kind of congregation.
Relationships (WIP)
Elaine Marie Hainault: Hal met Elaine when he went to the ER, bleeding from injuries he wouldn’t explain. She didn’t offer pity, only a steady, clinical kindness and asked no questions. Her presence steadies him, her unwavering care forcing him to confront the fear that he still might be worthy of it, but that hope is sometimes more terrifying than any nightmare. He trusts her, perhaps even more than he trusts himself.
Job: College Student (Bachelor of Arts in Music + Music Performance) with a part time job at a Blockbuster.
Username: Mus1c4lK1tt3n
Personality: Despite her looks, Grace is actually a kind and generous person. She may come off as a bit socially awkward, but that doesn't mean she can't hold a conversation. Especially if you get on a topic she particularly enjoys. Though don't be a fool - her kindness and generosity shouldn't be taken for gullible naivety. She won't hesitate to fight someone if push comes to shove, but she'll mostly go for the pacifist route first since she believes there are ways to end things peacefully. Don't mind if she makes a morbid or dark joke every once in awhile - she is a horror movie fan.
Worst Fear: Forgetting everything like she has once before; "You can never know who is telling the truth about everything you once knew. I don't want to ever experience that again." - Grace
Backstory: From a young age Grace was deemed an oddball among her fellow southerners. She seemed to mellow out in her weirdness - going from talking to some imaginary friend to talking to herself, going from having uncontrollable coughing fits to just coughing every so often, from staring into space and at people for hours to interacting normally - however when she got into middle school trouble seemed to find her.
The young girl would experience bullying of all kinds from a group of popular kids, most importantly Beth Majors. Beth hated Grace’s guts, but there was no real reason why. It all came ahead at the homecoming football game. Beth and her squad had cornered Grace under the bleachers - hidden by the darkness of the night - when Beth shoved a harmonica down the young girl’s throat. It wouldn’t take long for Grace to be found choking on the instrument and rushed to the hospital.
There she would be taken to surgery and die upon the removal of the harmonica. Miraculously, after a few minutes she would live again. However, after the surgery she was unable to recall any of the events from the incident, nor could she remember much of her life up until that point. Beth and all the other kids got off easy, but everyone involved - excluding Beth - felt terrible for what happened. They made sure that Grace’s life was better than it had been previously from their bullying. Beth allowed this to happen to save face.
It wasn’t until years later when the girls were in college did Beth show her true face. Grace had been dating a guy named Brad Wilson for a few months and was planning on introducing him to Beth - who was pretending to be Grace’s friend the whole time. Little did she know Beth and Brad had been dating behind her back - in fact Brad was only dating her because Beth believed it would be funny to make her think someone actually loved her.
Grace would soon find out the truth. She would’ve be heartbroken, but in that moment memories of the past - things long believed to never be remembered - flooded her brain and all she could feel was anger. She broke up with Brad and kicked the two out, renouncing her friendship with Beth. From there on out she would focus on her schooling and a certain chat group.
Just wanted to hop on here and say thank you for all the love and support that's been shown to this blog in ONE day. It's doesn't seem like a lot, but having this many people interested in this project means so much to me! I have the discord all set up, so if anyone wants the link, please message me!
My friend is making a collaborative creepypasta AU at @lucid-agony and they have just posted how to join!
The AU involves a group of people plagued by constant nightmarish lucid dreams all stemming from a being called the Missionary. Elaine creates an online forum and group chat to find others like her…
I’m helping with this project and we are hoping to create a visual novel as well! Please check it out!
This is my character Harlan “Hal” Davidson for the AU ^_^
I would recommend looking at the lore post first to get an idea of what the setting is. Other than that, I'm pretty open to any and all characters as long as it seems like they would fit in the year 2009. (If someone makes a weird emo freak or a scene kid, I will freak it)
This au is for people who are 18 years old and older. I thought about it for a long time, and I simply feel less anxious about running a server and an au with only adults involved in it directly. You can still consume and interact with the AU at your own discretion, though.
When you make your ref sheet, please tag #lucid agony oc, and I will reblog your ref sheet and add you to the master list. Please make sure your ref sheets include all the following.
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Character Ref Sheet;
Name:
Age:
Pronouns:
Job:
Username:
Personality:
Worst Fear:
Backstory:
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I'm also working on a discord for everything, so you can ask character questions there or in this blog's asks. Until then, happy oc making!
