A3! Backstage Story Translation - Sakyo Furuichi R: The Road to Gaining Muscles - Part 1
it's all in good fun, but this story does dive a little into sakyo's body image and makes some light mentions of diet talk. warning also (and mostly) applies for part 2
Sakoda: Good work today, Aniki! You took longer than I expected.
Sakyo: Yeah. I thought I’d be done by noon. Well, I can make it to the next job. Let’s move.
Sakoda: A’ight!
[Stomach growling]
Sakyo: …
Sakoda: Sorry! That’s my stomach! As soon as I realized it’s past noon, I got hungry…
Sakyo: Let’s go to a restaurant and grab a bite before the next job.
Sakoda: ‘Kay!
-
Sakyo: … Well, what should I get.
Sakoda: It’s tough to pick when there’s so much on the menu~
Sakoda: I’ll have the special mixed fried shrimp and a large servin’ of rice!
Sakyo: You’ve got the appetite of a high school boy.
Sakoda: I’m still young! This much is nothin’!
Sakyo: You think this got anythin’ to do with me being old?
Sakoda: A-Ah, no! That’s not what I meant…!
Sakoda: Uhhh… Right! I’m just exhausted from the previous job, that’s it!
Sakoda: What are you gonna have, Aniki?
Sakyo: The meals here are all pretty bulky… No matter what I pick, it’d be best to eat it in moderation.
Sakoda: Eat in moderation!? What are ya sayin’ Aniki! You should eat more! Sometimes you get so thin, I start worryin’!
Sakyo: You’re exaggerating.
Sakoda: Oh, I’d like to order!
-
Sakyo: … Whew.
Izumi: Ah, Sakyo-san! Welcome back.
Sakyo: Yeah, I’m back.
Omi: I’m sorry, dinner isn’t ready yet.
Izumi: Before you ask, today’s main dish is curry!
Sakyo: I can tell by the smell.
Izumi: Ahaha.
Omi: It seems it will take a while before it’s done, so why don’t you take a shower first?
Sakyo: Yeah. I’ll do that.
-
Sakyo: (... I was busy all day today.)
Sakyo: (I won’t be able to rest right away after dinner. I still gotta finish the company’s accounting affairs.)
Sakyo: (... Well, for now at least I can forget everything and let the day’s fatigue be washed away.)
intimacy - E.C. - 2020/art by Youquing (Eugene) Wang/via @bashert/Nina Lacour: We Are Okay/via @rosewater1997/via pinterest/via @spacefroggity/ via pinterest/ (x)/ via Pinterest
{Alice Oseman, Radio Silence/ Emily Palermo, from Untitled/ Franz Kafka, from Diaries/ Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar/ Marya Hornbacher, Waiting/ Nikos Kazantzakis, from a letter to Galatea Kazantzaki wr. c. May 1922/ Mahmoud Darwish/ Anna Akhmatova, from The Complete Poems of Anna Akhmatova; "The Old Portrait"/ Lyric Hunter, from "A Garden," Swallower/ Albert Camus/ Varsha/ Fyodor Dostoevsky, The Meek One}
I love your writing? I'm a beginner and I was wondering if you had any advice on how to improve ones writing style and dialogue. I've been struggling a lot with making descriptions flow. 💗💗
I'm??? Thank you sm😭🫂💕
I don't really think I'm the best person to ask for advice (I've only ever written poetry and songs until now + English isnt my native tongue) but I recommend checking out the writing advice tag in @hpowellsmith and @heywriters ^^
Personally, I really struggle when it comes to settings and places wndks so I'm extra careful to focus on people and their emotions. It's what I work best with given my experience. The Show Don't Tell technique is very very good and I love it.
I'm very nitpicky and perfectionist with my own writing so it really helps me to outline everything. And I mean everything. I recommend using these:
These are also very good in terms of developing characters. @infamous-if has also posted some advice about multifaceted characters^^
Have you ever heard a four-year-old run out of breath before she can finish her thought? I edit a lot of sentences that work the same way. You need a noun, you need a verb, you might need an object. Give some serious thought to stopping right there.
Sentences are building blocks, not bungee cords; they’re not meant to be stretched to the limit. I’m not saying you necessarily want a Hemingway-esque series of clipped short sentences, but most writers benefit from dividing their longest sentences into shorter, more muscular ones.
2. Paragraphs can only do one thing at a time.
A paragraph supports a single idea. Construct complex arguments by combining simple ideas that follow logically. Every time you address a new idea, add a line break. Short paragraphs are the most readable; few should be more than three or four sentences long. This is more important if you’re writing for the Web.
3. Look closely at -ing
Nouns ending in -ing are fine. (Strong writing, IT consulting, great fishing.) But constructions like “I am running,” “a forum for building consensus,” or “The new team will be managing” are inherently weak. Rewrite them to “I run,” “a forum to build consensus,” and “the team will manage.” You’re on the right track when the rewrite has fewer words (see below).
(If for some insane reason you want to get all geeky about this, you can read the Wikipedia article on gerunds and present participles. But you don’t have to know the underlying grammatical rules to make this work. Rewrite -ing when you can, and your writing will grow muscles you didn’t know it had.)
4. Omit unnecessary words.
I know we all heard this in high school, but we weren’t listening. (Mostly because it’s hard.) It’s doubly hard when you’re editing your own writing—we put all that work into getting words onto the page, and by god we need a damned good reason to get rid of them.
Here’s your damned good reason: extra words drain life from your work. The fewer words used to express an idea, the more punch it has. Therefore:
Summer months
Regional level
The entire country
On a daily basis (usually best rewritten to “every day”)
She knew that it was good.
Very
(I just caught one above: four-year-old little girl)
You can nearly always improve sentences by rewriting them in fewer words.
5. Reframe 90% of the passive voice.
French speakers consider an elegantly managed passive voice to be the height of refinement. But here in the good old U.S. (or Australia, Great Britain, etc.), we value action. We do things is inherently more interesting than Things are done by us. Passive voicemuddies your writing; when the actor is hidden, the action makes less sense.
Bonus: Use spell-check
There’s no excuse for teh in anything more formal than a Twitter tweet.
Also, “a lot” and “all right” are always spelled as two words. You can trust me, I’m an editor.
Easy reading is damned hard writing.
~ Nathaniel Hawthorne
This is tailored to writing articles, essays, and copy, but for creative writers these are still good tips and good to know! This info can help you write blurbs, query letters, promo posts, etc. Two types of writing, both useful.
The best ship dynamic is actually just. "I love you and it terrifies me. I'm terrified how much I need you and how much I want you to need me. I'm terrified I'm no good for you and I'm going to hurt you and ruin you and I'm terrified of how I feel when you're around me but I can't bear to push you away completely because I'm terrified to be without you so now we're stuck in limbo and that's terrifying too. I'm terrified that if I lost you now it'd destroy me and I'm terrified that it's too late to do anything about it. I love you. And it's terrifying."
Every 21st century piece of writing advice: Make us CARE about the character from page 1! Make us empathize with them! Make them interesting and different but still relatable and likable!
Every piece of classic literature: Hi. It's me. The bland everyman whose only purpose is to tell you this story. I have no actual personality. Here's the story of the time I encountered the worst people I ever met in my life. But first, ten pages of description about the place in which I met them.
Modern writing advice: Make sure your POV character goes through a significant arc! Make sure they are changed by the narrative! Make sure they learn a lesson!
Narrators of every book of the 19th century: the lesson I learned is these people fucking suck, sayonara you freaks
Modern writing advice: It’s all about the character overcoming obstacles and learning! They learn their lesson so they can fix their mistakes and make good choices in the future! It’s a character arc! It’s called growth! Readers love it!
Everyone from ancient times through the 19th century: would you like to watch a Guy fuck up twenty times in a row
I’ve been talking about this since last year bc of this particular scene in pride and prejudice and how they fit. This will be more of regency AU bc there is so much bending you can do for a character before you break them😂 So pls take this as more of a fun thing instead of a 1:1 recreation of a movie/book whose fans I rather not pissed.
areudirty
pixelskylines
tangentwithtanner
2087
yousharknotpass
