What a pleasure to hear from you. If you see my son around the castle anytime soon, please let him know that until he writes me, you’re my favorite child. Do I want to know what DICKSUCC is? I don’t want to know what DICKSUCC is.
Can’t bring things out of portraits, I don’t think. I’m not sure of the exact process, but the enchantments imbibe the painting with the personality traits and some memories of the subject – though, get this; the portrait’s ability to interact with viewers and other portraits depends not on the skill of the magical painter but the level of power of the subject of the portrait. That’s why Dumbledore’s can hold a full conversation on the twelve uses of dragon’s blood and why old Sir Cadagon can only shout about chivalry and swordplay.
I’m alright – off to Spain in a few days for a new assignment; I think there’s a crypt involved? I’ll bring back cool bones if I find any. Just kidding. Please don’t take this as in invitation to disrupt anyone’s final resting place.
I’m surprised you think your father would ever change a thing about his appearance without three month’s worth of research and development. I’ll bring it up with him at the next family dinner, but I doubt he’d entertain the idea.
I hope you’re doing well. Study hard, and look out for your sister and cousins.
PS: your xoxoxo’s are received and reciprocated.
19th February 2024
Bill Weasley
Shell Cottage
Rose isn’t here right now so I’m not quite as good at the whole Important Letter Process as I was last time (wasn’t I impressive?), but I decided speedily writing back was even more important (Bendomolena doesn’t look very excited to fly off again so soon, but I gave her all the owl treats I could find AND the ones I nicked off my dormmates, so I think she’s happier about it now, even if she acts grumpy — she’s kinda like Dad that way, I guess?) so here you go! I shall absolutely tell him that — I expect he’ll be quite dramatic about it, but I dunno if he’s learned how to do howlers yet (I have so many good idea about howlers, but Dad asked Grandma not to show me how she does hers with such flair, or else I’d send all my mail as howlers and that would be “extremely disruptive and irresponsible, Lucy”, or something or other) so maybe he’ll write you a letter with an excellent illustration of his reaction instead. Also, I’m never sure what it stands for, but it’s Rose’s organisation! I’m not really sure what we’re actually meant to do, I just know it’s about being nice to people and Rose is really very clever but maybe not very sensible, because I don’t think she ever said it out loud before she made the posters. (I know you said you don’t want to know, but I’m also trying to keep knowledge doors unlocked, and also maybe you’ll have ideas about ways to help Rose name things, because apparently my ideas sometimes make things worse.)
Oh, that’s so interesting! D’you reckon if I asked the Fat Lady about her magic level, she’d shout at me? I reckon maybe not if I asked her nicely. I dunno why they call her that, it’s a bit rude. Surely she’s got a real name if her friend Violet’s got one, right? D’you think it’s possible to add to portraits then? If we can’t bring things out, can we sorta just — add things in? I expect I wouldn’t have a very talkative painting — bit different from me now, anyway! — or maybe I’d just be real repetitive like good ol’ Sir Caddy, but I hope they do one of Molls when she’s 200 or whatever, so she can keep coming up with schemes and charms for all the little sproglets in a few centuries! Bet she’d be wicked at it.
I hope you enjoy Spain! I’ll find a crypt here and we can match! Just kidding (or am I??) — though I do think some bones could be very punk. Very chic. Maybe I’ll start wearing bones in my hair like the Flintstones. Tell me if you find any cool shapes, though, I’ll get Leander to give me a tattoo with them, it’ll be rad.
See, I figure we do the double pronged attack, yeah? You broach the subject, and I’ll keep pelting it at him slowly, until we wear him down! Erosion! Corrosion? Whatever. (Fun fact: mentioning ‘corrosion’, ‘cauldron bottoms’ and ‘Ludo Bagman’ or ‘Mundungus Fletcher’ in the same sentence to Dad sets him off for about fifteen minutes and he goes that reddish-purple colour I wanted for my curtains. Total save when he’s getting blustery and ready to tell you off. Not that he can really tell you off, I guess, but I bet he still tries sometimes.)
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