❀ hey, here's to you, california

hey, here's to you, california lani maitea pierce, previously valdez. 25 year old law senior. made with sarcasm and wine and everything fine. ❝I’m tough, I’m ambitious, and I know exactly what I want. If that makes me a bitch—...okay.❞ daughter of eduardo valdez. you probably don't know him. if you do, you know what you're dealing with. i'm like him, but less of a criminal.

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avaharps

Didn’t fall down all day. Haven’t rocked that look since middle school. 

that look should have stayed in middle school.

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TEXT ;; LANI/MARISOL

MARISOL: Yes please, I would love to.

LANI: Case and point, ladies and gentleman.

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brookrose-evans

And that concludes this episode of Stating the Obvious with Lani Pierce.

then don’t look so dopey and clueless, and i won’t feel like i need to fill you in on basic shit. it’s annoying how everyone seems to know who i am when i try so hard to make sure most of you don’t get the impression that we’re friends.

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httpnorajane

Yeah, I tend to do that.

is your life just that boring, or...?

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aliyahmctosh

Excuse me?

thinking out loud —   or thinking online, anyway.

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text;; mia + lani

Mia: I didn't knowww! It's hard to get emotions via text :P

Lani: If it helps, you can always assume at least a hint of sarcasm to everything i say.

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privileged-ken-doll

I refuse to accept such horrible fate, I’m still young enough to misplace my fucks.

you’re only two years younger than me, and i already consider myself an old lady. time is’a ticking.

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privileged-ken-doll

I know, right? I thought to myself, what do I do with such priceless information, and then it came to me… I should share it with Lani. Yes, she would certainly appreciate the mental images. You’re welcome.

i appreciate the thought —   actually, no, that’s a lie. i really don’t appreciate that.

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fostertheduval

Was my introduction that lame?

that rhyme has never been considered anything but lame.

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conradporter

Cabo. Is that not the proper word for it? I’m not well-versed in climate terminology. What would you suggest?

i would suggest hot, and boring.

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elisechangs

Sure thing, but you’re totally missing out on my peanut sauce.

i don’t know if that’s meant to be some kind of euphemism, but i don’t want any part of it.

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immj

Well, yeah… He got punched and punched for a living, I think. But also… He was fictional. And I’m not.

i’m sure that’s unfortunate.

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elliotwildes

The 2nd one.

at least i’m glad to see i still don’t have maternal instincts.

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sapphicdaniharper

I only cared about letting some asshole know that my girlfriend is in fact mine. 

doesn’t sound like they cared about that before.

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elisechangs

Oh my god, I was totally kidding! I swear I’m not one of those people who like, puts other people down. Female empowerment is super important to me. It was really a joke, I swear! Like, you’d know if I was trying to be a bitch to you. Double pinky promise. But like, you seem kinda stressed, so I’m inviting you over to dinner tonight. I made pad thai!

and you seem like someone i absolutely will not be able to tolerant for long periods of time. we all have our differences, i’m sure you can understand.

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privileged-ken-doll

So, I step out for a smoke - don’t judge - and what do I get? An ear and eyeful of my neighbor going at it with this very loud, very vocal lover. You would think I’m used to this kind of thing, considering our lovely town, but still…

that is —   delightful information.

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aliyahmctosh

Second day of school and I’m sick as a dog. Never really understand that saying but it definitely applies here. A mix of a head cold and stomach flu is definitely not what I needed to start off this semester. I can barely get out of bed and this just sucks. 

Someone should be a gem and bring me soup or something. 

you certainly seem promising.