lycanthropuns

I'M BACK, LEMONFUCKERS! I'm Jems and this is a wolfstar and marauders blog. This is a new blog but you can find all the old posts here. Header, icon, sidebar (and possibly every other art on this blog) by runrunhurryhurry.

[eleadore]

“Do you have any idea what a bloody awful liar you make?” 

[lycanthropuns]

harry: moony, wormtail, padfoot, and prongs? who are they? did u know them?

remus: -thinking about the sick burn his map alter ego just laid on snape; internally screaming GET REKT-

remus: we've met

[lycanthropuns]

[lycanthropuns]

Sirius: You value our friendship more than your ethical responsibilities?

Remus: Our friendship is an ethical responsibility.

[butchynerd]

I know people imagine Dumbledore laughing in his office about all the letters that get sent to Harry and all. But I think it was really Professor McGonagall. I think it’s infinitely more hilarious to consider her sending owl after owl to 4 Privet Drive, only to appear as a cat to watch in amusement. 

[batcii-archive-deactivated20210]

people in fanfiction are so good at identifying v specific smells. I literally struggle to identify vanilla when I’m sniffing a candle labelled “VANILLA” how are these kids getting woodsmoke, rain, mint, and a whiff of byronic despair from a fuckin tshirt

[puppyvegeta-deactivated20190313]

Am I the only one who think is awkward that everybody including voldemort calls Peter Pettigrew by his teenager nickname?

[puppyvegeta-deactivated20190313]

500% SURE THAT EVERY TIME SOMEONE SAYS “OH DEAR LORD” JAMES POTTER CALMLY TURNS AROUND AND GOES “YES?”

[lycanthropuns]

Remus: Are you fucking serious?

Sirius: I wish I could

Sirius: I mean

Sirius: look at me

Sirius: I'm fucking hot

Remus:

Remus: I don't know why on earth I still insist on you

[lycanthropuns]

what really happened during marauders era

Remus: PADFOOT WHAT THE HELL

Remus: PRONGS WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU

Remus: I DIDN'T ASK YOUR OPINION, SHUT UP

Remus: I HAVE NO IDEA WHY I STILL HANG OUT WITH YOU ASSHOLES

Remus: WHAT.THE.FUCK

Remus: I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID THIS

Remus: OH

Remus: YOU DID IT

Remus: I'M GOING TO KILL YOU

Remus: WHY ON EARTH-

Remus: DID YOU JUST-

Remus: I'M SERIOUSLY CONSIDERING MURDERING YOU

Remus: YOU DID WHAT-

Remus: JAMES? SIRIUS? I DON'T KNOW THESE ASSHOLES

Remus: WHAT WERE YOU THINKING YOU ABSOLUTE TOSSER

Remus: YOU KNOW WHAT? DO WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT

Remus: I'M DEFINITELY NOT GOING TO COVER YOUR ASS THIS TIME

Remus: I DON'T KNOW WHY I STILL BOTHER WITH THIS SHIT

Remus: THIS IS THE MOST STUPID THING I'VE EVER HEARD

Remus: I'M NOT GOING TO DO THIS AGAIN

Remus: NO.FUCKING.WAY

Remus: NO

Remus: N-

Remus:

Remus: FINE!

Remus: I hate you guys so much.

James: He loves us.

Sirius: Definitely.

Peter: So adorable.

[puppyvegeta-deactivated20190313]

DO YOU THINK AFTERLIFE JAMES AND FRED WOULD FANGIRL ABOUT EACH OTHER AND EXCHANGE AUTOGRAPHS BECAUSE I DO BC OMG THAT MAP IS THE MOST INGENIOUS THING EVER IT HELPED A LOT THANK YOU AND NO NEED TO THANKS ME BTW THOSE WEASLEY'S WIZARD WHEEZES ARE SO FUCKING AWESOME YOU'RE A FREAKING GENIOUS.

And then James says the Marauders have a vacancy to be filled and they all agree that no one suits better than Fred and thEN THEY JUST LITERALLY SIT TOGETHER TO SEE THEIR GRANDSONS AND NEPHEWS SPREAD THE PRANK LEGACY OMG I’M SO FUCKING DONE

[puppyvegeta-deactivated20190313]

Headcanon where Sirius and Remus decide to marry right after Harry was born. So they have this really huge party to celebrate the wedding and also the first marauder successor. Then James sends a letter to hogwarts inviting McGonagall to the party, but he purposely doesn’t specifies what it is about. But in the envelope he wrote down in a very far-fetched handwriting “Professor McGonagall’s Worst Nightmare”. So she goes to the Potter’s and the scene was: Remus Lupin and Sirius Black getting married and James Potter holding what seems to be nothing but a promise that his prank and serious lack of judgement legacy will remain alive. So Sirius calmly walks up to her and asks if she has any name suggestions for his and Remus’ first child because Harry Potter definitely can’t go to Hogwarts alone. So McGonagall starts the countdown for her retirement because there’s no fucking way this is gonna happen, thank you.

[puppyvegeta-deactivated20190313]

No but can you imagine how Fred and George have figured out the Marauder’s Map password? Because the map is obviously interactive when it insults Snape on PoA. I can clearly see the letters popping up on the parchment when the twins tried to read it. Something like:

“Mr. Wormtail presents his compliments to whoever the fuck you are.” “Mr. Prongs is astonished and profoundly relieved that someone dignified have finally found the map.” “Mr. Padfoot is enchanted to see such distinguished young gentlemen so anxious to do mischief.” “Mr. Moony would like to ask… Do you need any help?”

[puppyvegeta-deactivated20190313]

Marauders’ Era: A summary.

[puppyvegeta-deactivated20190313]

But what if Moony lived on Jupiter with its 67 moons wtf his furry little problem would explode or what

James Potter or Sirius Black, at some point after a fascinating Astronomy class (via puppyvegeta)

[lycanthropuns]

Remus: For the last time... can you arses please stop using the word lycanthropy out loud when we are in public?

James: We need a nickname for you, Moonbeam.

Remus: No fucking way it's gonna be Moonbeam.

Sirius: Calm down, McWerewolf, we're working on that.

Remus: How about not working at all?

Peter: How about Moonshine?

Remus: That's probably the most queer suggestion so far.

Sirius: Moonlight then, you poof.

Remus: This is so cliche.

James: How about Moonish?

Sirius: How about Moonlit?

Remus: How about Remus Fucking Lupin?

Peter: Shut up, Moonless.

Remus: Moonless? It doesn't make any sens-

Sirius: Lunarian.

Remus: Oh, God.

James: Moonet.

Peter: Remus Moonet Lupin.

Remus: No.

James: Okay, how about this. While we plot the perfect nickname, because our Moonbeam deserves the best, we'll call his...lycanthropy problem as his... furry problem?

Sirius: Furry little problem.

Peter: It sounds good.

Remus: It sounds stupid.

Sirius: Shut up. It's perfect.

James: Yeah, Remus. Don't worry we'll find a good nickname to your furry...

Sirius: Little.

Peter: Problem.

Remus:

Remus: For Merlin's hairy balls...

Sirius: Ew, Remus. That's not the kind of furry little problem we were thinking of.

James: Shut up, Padfoot. C'mon, Merlin's hairy balls.

Remus: You're not calling me Merlin's hairy balls, this is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.

Peter: Merlin's.

James: Hairy.

Sirius: Balls.

Remus:

[lycanthropuns]

Lily: Detention again?

Remus: Yeah, both of them.

Lily: What's wrong with them? For Merlin's sake.

Remus: They're barking mad.

Remus:

Remus: Especially Sirius.

Remus:

Remus: Literally.

Remus:

Remus: You have no idea.