not felling happy.. not happy at all...
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@lynxsea
not felling happy.. not happy at all...
" once you lost it, you can never get it back."... lets hurt people you "care" about... thank you for a beatiful dinner. I hope one day you will understand... hvala
Hurt... aaah life is cruel.
true! .. but this time is not for me!
This is it i guess... i realized in last few days that I am just a passenger on this ride of my life. Life is one way road. You can chose your own path, but no matter what you do or which choices you make on this journey you will end up exactly where you meant to be! You can’t turn back or escape your destiny!
I also realized that I’m not so important to certain people I though I might be. I’m just there for them. I realized a lot of things. Some are nice and some not so nice but, what the hell... sometimes you win and sometimes you learn!
The End? hmm.. not really.. i would rather say a new start. Now i have a new mission, a new goal, a new journey ahead of me. Unfortunately, it looks like I will have to walk this path alone this time... As sad as I am because of that fact, I’m more determined that I will make my dream come true! The Universe knows...
If you were in my heart I'll surely not break you If you were beside me And my love would take you I'll keep you in safety For ever protect you I'll hide you away from the world you rejected
... you were there... just saying...
Today i realize that i didn’t get any present for my birthday from my beautiful ex... i told her that, because she just bought a gift for her ex (today is his birthday). so I was just wondering why for him and not for me. Her reply was that she is actually buying birthday gifts just for him and he is buying gifts for her. So she is not buying anything for anybody else :)
Then she told me “yeah ok you got me a surprise party”...
Well to be honest, you got much more... not only that i spend i don’t know how much time to organize everything... to find you a proper cake, blow all the balloons for decoration and arrange a private charter boat for your party. don’t forget how much time and struggle i put in to get all your friends together to make you a nice video for your birthday... and of course to order “Tukaj sva midve doma” sign (witch was made for us and our dogs) to be brought from our home country to Thailand... But then again, yes... it was only a surprise party :)
Don’t get me wrong. i really didn’t expect any gift from you (especially not because of “i got you this and that”), i really don’t need anything :)
I posted this just because I’m amazed how people see things after a while :)
sigh...
I want my SSI! #diving #fun #ssi #divepointsamui (at Koh Samui Island)
It is hard. I tough it may be, but not like this.
...
Staring at the ceiling in the dark Same old empty feeling in your heart 'Cause love comes slow and it goes so fast Well you see her when you fall asleep But never to touch and never to keep 'Cause you loved her too much...
... and you dived too deep.
Beginning of the end? Are we there yet? Time will show... no matter how i try to fight this... i cant. I made a decision... probably wrong one... but only logical one... time will show... i feel lost again. A little help would be nice?
...3 days ago...
M:”Are you happy?” Me:”What?” M:”Are you happy in your life?” Me:”uummm... i guess so ...”
that question stuck in my head for a long 3 days and I've been thinking about it a lot
Am I happy? No, not really.
I miss that someone special in my life. I miss hugs, touches, cuddling, duality ... I miss that feeling to belong somewhere... i miss being part of herd. I miss being part of something special.
on the other hand I can’t really complain about my life. I have a job which I love (it’s not perfect but then again nothing is), roof over my head, food ... and trying to make the most out of everyday...
but... no, I’m not happy.
Yes! Yes!
Yes...
Sometimes i really wonder what happened to this world? What happened to this people? Is it really so hard to be nice? Is it? In this 2 weeks here in Malaysia and one year in Thailand I relised that people in my line of work are more or less same. They just dont care. For them this is nothing more than 9-5 job… driven by greed… lust for money… sigh… maybe it’s me! Maybe I’m the one who does all wrong. Or I was born in a wrong world at the wrong time. My moral and professional values differs from other instructors. I always try to give my best and to do my best. It’s not always right i guess, at least not for everybody. But still… why? Im a member of dying breed… more I try to please people, to help them, more i got hammered down. But i believe that one day i will find a group of people that will really appriciate my work.
A blast from the past :) old school ;) #oldschool