being dustin's hot older sister and having eddie and steve fight over you. the rivalry. the cuteness. the fact that they both absolutely use dustin to make you like them, and he knows and he hates it.
steve forces him to go out for ice cream just so he can invite you along (even though dustin already has plans with the kids, which is how steve ends up paying for nine fucking cones).
eddie makes him stay up watching a "boring" movie with you, and just when eddie thinks yours and his hands meet in the popcorn bowl dustin just grins up at him and gives his fingers a squeeze.
bc on one hand ew it's gross that they're both going after you? his big sister?? but now dustin has them right where he wants them. steve ignoring his walkie calls? "steve, if you don't answer right now, i'll say you called y/n ugly and she'll go crying to eddie!" eddie threatens to kill his character at the table? "i don't think my sister would be very happy to pick me up in tears, would she? steve would never do that."
thoughts? what else would they do? bonus points if you end up in a relationship with both of them to dustin's absolute dismay (and private delight bc now neither of his friends are upset).
Henderson!Reader who is basically sunshine on a pair of legs, raised by a doting Claudia who constantly builds up her confidence and builds her into this teddy bear personified
Steve used to be kind of a dick to Reader in his King Steve phase. But for some reason Reader never held it against him; she was always kind to him, tried to see the good in him even if he didn’t deserve it. Most of the time it just made him feel like a dick.
Eddie befriended her during his second senior year when she was just a junior. He thought she was sweet, if not a little annoying with her do-good attitude. As a nonconformist, it’s severely hard to be friends with someone who still thinks it’s rude not to address the teacher with sir or ma’am.
When they both start liking Reader it was kind of like a telepathic note that they just KNEW the other liked them, too. And instantly it became some kind of dick swinging contest that only Reader was unaware of.
They both start ATTEMPTING to hang out with Reader more, but this usually just ends up with the three of them following her around like lost puppy dogs, carrying her bag for her or buying her sodas. Reader is just so happy b/c she gets to spend this time with her closest friends 🥰
Steve takes more after the chivalry role. He constantly opens doors for Reader and proceeds to slam it in Eddie’s face when he walks in after her. He also buys milkshakes with two straws for them to share but Eddie looks him dead in the eye and slurps that motherfucker, brain freeze be damned.
Eddie, on the other hand, is more like the playful role? He constantly tries to make Reader laugh by doing silly things and cracking jokes. Sometimes Steve trips him up and Eddie will fall on purpose just to see Reader giggle and help him up.
They go to the movies and do the yawn arm stretch thing at the same time and accidentally interlock their arms behind Reader’s head. She laughs and just grabs both of their hands, interlocking them with hers.
Steve always gets so excited when she visits him at work until she starts arriving with Eddie who’s just standing there all smugly beside her because he can dote and hug on her but Steve can’t because \\work//
Eddie’s so happy b/c Reader agreed to go to his Corroded Coffin gig and waves at her so happy from the stage until he sees her there with Steve who is giving Eddie this shit eating grin and waving at him, too. Eddie nearly contemplates breaking his precious baby guitar over Steve’s head.
Eddie and Steve pester Dustin constantly asking him who Reader’s favorite is and he’s just so mentally exhausted like ‘WHO. CARES.’
Steve hosts like a movie night and ‘conveniently’ Nancy and Robin both cancelled. Reader and Eddie shows up and Steve is APPALLED b/c Reader’s dressed in a Hellfire shirt, EDDIE’S Hellfire shirt to be exact. Eddie’s smug asf ofc. Plus he drove her here which makes it worse
Buuuuut Steve manages to convince her to cuddle up next to him b/c he’s a personal heater and has the fluffiest blanket. So she’s laying across his chest and Steve just smirks over at Eddie who’s pouting.
Steve likes to baby Reader a lot. Part of being the ‘babysitter’ makes him very…for lack of a better word, devoted? He just likes to take care of Reader, make her feel like she doesn’t have to lift a finger. He likes to buy her things and cook for her.
Eddie, on the other hand, likes to have fun with Reader. Go out and do stuff just the two of them whether it’s something stupid like just sitting together above the quarry or reading to each other in his bed. Eddie just likes those quiet moments with them b/c they’re so sweet and personal. He gets to talk about stuff he doesn’t normally
Eventually, after a long time of fighting over her the two of them finally ask her who she’d rather go out with. They won’t be hurt they just want her to be happy
Reader is confused b/c she thought all three of them were dating this whole time together?
A/N: Please interact it means a lot especially when writers take hours planning and developing story lines . I won’t be going 100% on how it happened in the show or the manga such as the changes to the game of tag they will not be huge changes at all but I will be including all of the characters and their personalities will remain the same. Let me know some ideas you’d like to see and maybe I’ll put it in the story! There may at some point be smut but not for a long time and I will post warnings beforehand. 🥹🫶🏼THANKYOU 🫶🏼🥹
Masterlist | Ch. 2
Everything was silent which was strange considering your apartment was next to Shibuya crossing. You peered out of the open window seeing nothing but a dark city. You've never seen Tokyo this dark or quiet it carried an eerie feeling but you brushed it off after all there had been a storm a few hours earlier and it wasn't unusual for the streets to be bare.
You grabbed a black zip-up jacket with a hood, an umbrella and a flashlight. You exited your apartment and took the stairs, if the power is off the elevators won't work. As you opened the door to the stairwell you noticed that no one else had taken them which left you questioning your earlier thought about the power. Maybe it wasn't affecting anyone else?
You switch the flashlight on and At a quickened pace you take the steps. When you finally reach the bottom you step outside, the door to the stairwell had been removed a few weeks earlier for a renovation. You weren't the type to complain about small things such as that after all, it didn't impact your life in any way. However, at this moment you wished that door would be there to stop you from facing what is right in front of you.
The streets were bare, the wind blowing but no rain. You take a glance at the umbrella in your hand.
Stupid.
The power cuts and I choose an umbrella? You sigh placing it down on the stairs behind you along with the flashlight before venturing further out into the street, you reach the crossing and see a flash of light in the sky, it's the only light you've seen so far and although every hair on your body raised and your feet told you to run, you walked towards it.
You take note of everything around you as you always had done, your friends would always complain and tell you that you thought too hard but it never hurts to be prepared. You begin to panic internally when you pass a few streets and still no one. As of right now, the light in the sky is the only hope you hold and it's a hope you cling to.
As you approach the building you see the lights are on, the only lights in Tokyo. You rush inside the building against your better judgement to be met with 7 people you've never seen before but at this moment you've never been happy to see a person. Even if you didn't know them.
You pick up one of the phones from the table in front of you hoping it has some use, the screen illuminates and it isn't anything as you'd hoped. The small screen scans your face before a cheerful voice declares that you have been verified.
You turn to the other individuals in the room focusing on the two boys huddled together.
"What is this?" your voice breaks as you fake confidence.
The two boys turn to you and you wait patiently hoping for some kind of response. The boy in the orange shirt doesn't seem happy when his friend replies. "It's a game, you have to clear the mission and stay alive" he pauses before continuing "I'm Arisu, this is Karube."
He gestures to his friend and you smile sheepishly, your mind fills with questions, however, before you can ask another the same cheery voice makes it clear that the Registration period had closed. The phone flashes and you read it over, confused by every word.
Game: Tag
Difficulty: 5 of spades
Rule: Run away from the tagger
Clear condition: find the safe zone hidden within the building within the time limit.
Time limit: 20 minutes
After 20 min the bomb inside the building will detonate.
You follow Arisu to the elevator and decide to make use of the few moments you'll have to gather information.
"What is this place, where is everyone, what's this game?"
There is a slight chuckle behind you and you turn to face the boy behind you, he was wearing a white jacket similar to yours. His hair was light blonde and he was short and slender, you couldn't see his face well and he seemed to have been in his own world.
As interesting as he may have seemed you knew you didn't have time to think about him as Arisu had begun to answer your questions.
"It's Tokyo, there are some people here but not many. We have to play games to survive you'll get a visa if you win which means you don't have to play for a few days but if you die then you're gone. We have to hide and don't get caught by the tagger. We have to find a safe zone. When you find it gets to it as fast as you can"
You had answers yet you still felt as confused as the moment you got here. The elevator door opens and Arisu looks back at you.
"Stay alive" he turns his head and runs up the stairs with his friend following behind him.
You know you need to do the same, you take the stairs to the top floor, it's either a really smart decision or a really stupid one. It could be where the taggers will start but if they start on the ground floor it would take them much longer to get to you.
You watch as the next 5 minutes are filled with bloodshed. You weren't surprised at the sight of a dead body but you couldn't help but wince every time you hear a gunshot. However, you were surprised when people started shouting about their location, they were working together.
Working so we can all live, at least those of us that are still alive.
Just a few feet away the blonde-haired boy who laughed in the elevator stood casually watching the game, although it was nothing more than a movie.
You begin to wonder how someone can become so calm, how long has he been here? How long will I be here? You took a breath and headed towards him, you couldn't worry about what will happen, you had to survive now. Besides, he was so calm, he had to know something.
"You're not participating" you speak so quietly you can barely make it out.
You were too afraid to make a sound, too afraid to get caught.
"I'm watching" he replies in a voice that is all too cheery, similar to that of the voice from the phone.
Nothing and no one should be laughing in a place like this.
You glance over at a girl jumping from level to level as if it was a normal ability for every human, you'd hope everyone here would survive but the reality wasn't as kind. Although death wasn't something you were afraid to witness it wasn't something you wished for others or yourself.
You sigh and walk away to your previous position, he wasn't going to talk, at least not here. Truth-seeking would have to wait, instead, you begin to look for the safe zone, everyone else was risking their lives to hide from the tagger, and you would make sure you would win the game for whoever was left.
You noticed a door with no bullet holes yet the wall around it had been shot to death, you recall the tagger shooting at two girls earlier but why would he shoot so far unless he didn't want to kill them but wanted to get them away from the door...
You know what this meant. You know where the safe zone was but why was it so easy and why is there no one guarding it?
Six minutes remaining
The phone chimed and you decided you had waited long enough. You took a breath and began running. You took the stairs down being cautious around every corner ready to run Incase a tagger is lurking around. You safely got to the door and hesitantly tried the handle. It opened and you paused before going in.
"You figured it out too" a voice behind you made you jump.
You turned around to be faced with the blonde man once again, his face remaining straight with no emotion. He lets out a slight smirk as you nod.
"Go ahead then" he signals for you to walk through the door.
You take a breath and walk inside. The room is black and you can't see anything, the blonde boy holds a device in his hand but you can't figure it out and be in a small room with a stranger fills you with a sense of immense fear.
Suddenly shots fly around the room and the blonde boy runs outside closing the door and leaving you with the tagger. Asshole.
You duck quickly and run behind the tagger as he reloads, you hit the gun out of his hand and suddenly the door opens the blonde boy presses a button on his small device, a taste, before throwing it to you. Once you catch it he closes the door again.
You don't even think before shoving it into the tagger's chest and tasing him.
You finally breathe after the tagger falls to the floor, you compose yourself and look around the room, you walk towards the door behind the tagger's body. You open it and at first, you are blinded by the light but you quickly adjust. It is an empty room except for two buttons on the wall and for the first time in your life, you need someone else to help you.
You rush back outside to find the blonde boy hoping he had waiters, you're surprised when you realise he had not
"To clear the game I need help it has to be two people" You scream to alert the other players hoping that someone would come.
After a few minutes, Arisu and the climber girl run around the corner, you prepare yourself to run in case there is a tagger behind them, however, no one follows them.
"Where is it?" the climber girl asks out of breath.
"It's inside the room, there's a door. Two of us need to press the buttons to clear the game" you explain quickly.
Arisu takes a deep breath before sighing "I'll do I-"
Before Arisu could finish his sentence the tagger who was moments ago passed out had begun shooting from his position on the floor, you don't hesitate to hide.
You wait patiently and silently behind the wall.
10 seconds remaining
You panic and rush towards the room you had nearly died in seconds earlier only to hear another chime from the phone in your pocket. The screen illuminates your face.
The game cleared, congratulations you've earned a visa!
Visa: 5 days
Arisu, the climber girl and the blonde boy walk out of the room the game had been cleared in and In a quick breath, you thank them.
Arisu nods and the blind boy scoffs, the climber girl smiles slightly and you think for a moment about how different it would have been to meet them at home.
Real home.
You follow them to the exit of the building and despite all of your unanswered questions and fears about this world, you decide the only place you can go to is the apartment you had called home for the past 3 years. You start to walk in the direction you came from hours earlier but you're stopped when a hand touches your shoulder, you turn around warily only to be met with the smug face of the victorious blonde.
"You're not entirely worthless, I'm chishiya" his face remains still and his eyes remain cold.
You mumble your name back at him and after a minute he makes another comment.
"You weren't as stupid as everyone else. You used your brain. Maybe you'll be useful. You should come with me" He stated, seeming uninterested in his own words.
You stood silent for a moment debating your choices. You weren't sure where he was going but it had to be better than being alone. Maybe he knows the answers, maybe he can bring everyone back.
You pause before nodding "Okay, but first I have to get some stuff."
A/N: i was always of the opinion that a season finale should be twice as long as usual episodes, so you bet your sweet little ass i won't apologize for this monster of a chapter LMFAOASKSKS. that being said, i put my everything into this and i hope it shows~ have fun reading💞💞
***
Part 8
"Arisu?!"
You couldn't believe it.
Said man looked as dirty as you felt, his hair just a wild, unwashed mop, and his face just as haggard and tired as yours. But it was without a doubt Arisu, a very alive Arisu.
As soon as he spotted you, he also stopped in his tracks, his eyes widening comically. "It's you two!"
You beamed up at Chishiya who only responded with a typical twitch of his mouth, before running toward your friend. The wind blew your hat off, but you didn't really care. Maybe this overly exuberant greeting was also partly due to a guilty conscience; after all, you had thought embarrassingly little of your friends in the last few days.
Yes, instead, you've been living out a kitschy, post-apocalyptic romcom, a little voice in your head teased, but you quickly brushed it aside when you reached the lanky man and pulled him into a brief hug.
He then grabbed your arms and looked you over from head to toe – and then back up to your head where his gaze finally lingered on the bandage. You saw him raise one of his eyebrows, before his eyes darted in the direction of Chishiya for a split second.
"It wasn't me", the man behind you said drily.
The sound of his deadpan voice and the fact Arisu had apparently thought Chishiya had just... whacked you over the head or something, made you let out a little chuckle.
"I... I really thought you were dead", Arisu muttered and even looked like he was seeing a ghost standing before him now, instead of you, "The first day we got separated from the King of Spades... It all happened so fast... We tried to go back for you by the way, but I guess we were too late and you were already gone. Back then, though, I really thought you didn't make it."
You saw him swallow and suddenly got a lump in your throat yourself. In all the excitement of the last few days, you had actually started to forget how much you had started to like him and Usagi and Kuina in the short time you had spent together at the Beach. You squeezed his arm, whereupon he gave you a small smile in return.
"Kuina, on the other hand… She always believed in you."
Involuntarily, you searched your surroundings for your other friends, but to no avail. "You know, as happy as I am to see you safe and sound, Arisu... Where are the others?"
Apparently he saw the faint hint of panic in your eyes, wherefore he immediately tried to placate you. "Ah, don't worry, they are fine. Well... Usagi is, at least. I don't know about Kuina, she left us some time ago. To look for you two, actually."
Of course she did.
"Sounds about right. She's the second biggest fool I know, after all." You rolled your eyes as Chishiya stepped next to Arisu and turned his head in your direction. "After you, of course."
You had the childish urge to stick your tongue out at him.
Arisu, meanwhile, looked back and forth between the two of you before rubbing the back of his neck. "I'm honestly still pretty flabbergasted that I ran into you here... Not just because I thought you dead, but also because I can't believe you aren't at each other's throats yet."
"It almost happened yesterday", you muttered, then immediately paused, "Wow... That already seems like days ago somehow."
During this exchange, Chishiya had moved a few steps away again and was now observing the area. And the blimp of the Queen of Hearts, which hovered strangely inconspicuous above one of the skyscrapers to your right. It was so high up that you could only see it if you bent your head back. But once spotted, it was hard to take your eyes off it again.
"Interesting..." Chishiya turned to your questioning faces. "It seems that this is some kind of hub where everything converges."
After these words, you, too, began to slowly turn around and Arisu followed suit. At first you noticed nothing but overgrown and half collapsed buildings. And the aforementioned blimp, of course. Nothing that you hadn't seen before. But then… A billboard, almost fully covered in ivy, caught your attention and suddenly it hit you.
"But this is...", Arisu muttered at the same moment.
"Why does it look so...?", you questioned, "But how? This can't be a coincidence."
"There are two games left", Chishiya then explained, "All the players who can still stand must be coming here, to Shibuya. Apparently this is-"
But he couldn't finish. Because suddenly there was such a loud bang that you felt your eardrum vibrate.
And then Chishiya went down.
It happened so quickly that at first you were unable to react and just stared at the white fabric of his jacket gradually turning dark red. It wasn't until Chishiya let out a loud groan that your legs finally started to move. Shortly thereafter, you knelt down next to him, your trembling hands hovering in the air, and racked your brain about what to do, but it was as if your head had suddenly gone blank; you couldn't even think of the most basic first aid measures. Meanwhile, the white was filling up with more and more red...
"Heeey."
Arisu stepped protectively in front of you, his weapon raised, so you couldn't take a look at the newcomer until he had taken a few more steps in your direction. But that wouldn't have been necessary either way; you would recognize that grating voice anywhere.
"Niragi... He's alive?", you breathed out, unable to hide your horror as you now got a better look at him.
The man really did look like he burned to death and was resurrected again. His charred skin was reminiscent of melted candle wax, held together only by the many rags he had tied around his body. He really looked like a horror figure come to life. And to make matters worse, this very same horror figure still had a gun pointed at you – which was never a good sign, in any movie.
"Oh, am I glad to finally see you guys again", he drawled in the next moment, "I'm so fuckin' happy!"
He sounded as crazy as he looked, which immediately made your situation even more dangerous. Not that this would've been necessary; Niragi had good reason to hate you all, after all. Especially Chishiya, who was now propping himself up a bit so he could look at his adversary. You quickly moved your arms to support him.
"You aim like shit, did you mean to miss a vital organ?", he then shouted.
You couldn't believe him. "Lay back down, you idiot! What are you doing?!"
He ignored you, however, except for a brief blink in your direction.
You were beginning to think that Niragi wasn't the only crazy one here. Chishiya had been shot, yet he couldn't think of anything better to do than insult the very same guy who had a fucking gun pointed at you all??
"Ah, well. It's too late for a surprise attack now." Niragi grinned and continued walking towards you. At least he had lowered his gun for now, but Arisu still looked as tense as you felt. "So. Let's begin. A new murder game..." He stopped and shrugged. "This is all the three of us are capable of anyway, isn't it?"
Okay, two things were certain: This guy was officially nuts and he seemed to ignore you for some reason. Though you were unsure if that should make you feel relieved or more scared. If you didn't matter to him, he probably had even less qualms about putting a bullet through your head.
"A game between players?", Chishiya asked with a barely noticeable tremor in his voice.
You felt him sway for a moment as his arms could no longer bear the weight of his injured body, and immediately you slid a little closer to give him more support. It had to hurt like hell and yet he hardly reacted; only the soft hiss of the air he slowly sucked in through his teeth betrayed him.
Stupid, you thought, biting the inside of your cheek. That he was trying to put on a brave face probably only made the pain worse...
"The three of us are exactly the same", Niragi said, "Guys who don't fit into society. Social outcasts. Losers. And yet... we crave to feel alive more than anyone else. Isn't that ironic?"
He paused and for a few seconds no one said a word, then suddenly his body was shaken by a violent tremor and he leaned forward, spitting blood. You inevitably tensed up even more. This man might still be alive, but the strain of the last days had nevertheless taken its toll on him – it seemed as if his body was virtually dissolving from the inside out.
All the more reason not to be complacent for even one second. Nothing was more dangerous than a man who considered himself doomed.
"I don't have much time left, as you can see", he finally confirmed your thoughts, inhaling and exhaling shakily, "So do me this last favor, will you? Play this game with me, come on, come on! We're bros after all!"
Fearing the worst, you winced as he suddenly jerked his arm up, but then there was only a dull clatter as a gun landed in a patch of grass in front of you. You stared at it motionlessly for a moment until Chishiya suddenly made an effort to stand up.
"Wh-?! Wait, no, hold on!", you quickly interjected, "I get it."
But you hadn't even really gotten up before there was suddenly another loud bang, and not even a second later a smoking hole could be seen in the concrete not half a meter away from your left hand. Startled, you pulled it back and whipped your head around again.
"Ah, ah, ah." Niragi grinned, blowing away the smoke at the tip of the barrel of his gun. "Not you, sunshine, I don't care about you. Loverboy here gets it or you get a matching bullet wound."
The situation was so tense that none of you thought about objecting to the nicknames. Arisu turned his upper body towards you as Chishiya grabbed your arm with a shaky hand and looked at you imploringly. "Don't do anything stupid", his eyes seemed to say, which, for once, you gladly complied with. So instead, you just bit your lower lip and then helped him stand up. With one hand pressed to his bleeding wound, he finally dragged himself to the gun and picked it up. You almost expected him to topple over, but, luckily, everything went well.
"You know... I never thought you two would become so close", Niragi mused, "But I guess every beauty needs her beast, right?"
The broad grin he gifted you afterwards brought back unpleasant memories of his many advances back at the Beach. You wrapped your arms around your torso uncomfortably. For you, this had only meant some catcalling and the odd flirt or two, but you knew about the "rumors" and what he had wanted to do to Usagi. And you were sure, if it hadn't been for the witch-hunt you wouldn't have gotten off so lightly either.
"...Besides, you've always enjoyed humiliating me, haven't you? Hm, Chishiya? So yeah, that checks out. Why not show me another thing I couldn't do."
You didn't know whether it was on purpose or whether Chishiya had just stumbled, but after those last words from Niragi he suddenly took a step to the right and was now effectively blocking the other's view of you.
"Well, it's hard to resist. You always make it too damn easy for me, buddy", Chishiya said with a smile in his voice, "But what about this game now, hm? Sounds like fun, let's do it." He turned his head towards Arisu. "Are you in?"
At first you thought you had misheard him. Fun?! It would be news to you, that being shot in the stomach resulted in losing brain cells. What was he thinking??
"Come on", Chishiya continued when Arisu, understandably, hesitated, "Don't play dumb. I know you have unfinished business with me because of the witch-hunt, we might as well deal with it right now. Let's settle this, once and for all."
Arisu just gaped at him. "What the hell are you saying? That's-"
"Ugh guuuys, use your damn weapons, what else do you have them for??", Niragi impatiently interjected.
"Can't we work this out some other way, man?!"
After Arisu had finished, there was a brief silence between the three of them and it seemed to you like the whole world was holding its breath. And then Niragi whipped up his gun again and fired it at Arisu. You saw him jump out of the way just in time, right before you yourself were pulled around by Chishiya and dragged behind a nearby car. This whole situation seemed like a terrible déjà vu to you...
In the next moment your back slammed against the rusted passenger door. The impact squeezed all the air out of your lungs. When you regained your breath, you quickly slid down to the ground so that your head was no longer near the windows. Not soon after, Chishiya joined you. Unlike you, however, he immediately raised his head again to scope out the situation, all the while clenching his teeth, which made your eyes involuntarily search for the blood-red flower on the side of his jacket again.
"Chishiya-"
"It's nothing", he said tersely.
You stared at him in disbelief. "It doesn't look like 'nothing'!"
You tried in vain to suppress the tremor in your voice, but in the end, it seemed to be exactly this that caught Chishiya's attention. As his eyes flitted in your direction, you felt as if he had just thrown you a lifeline, which you grasped all too gratefully. He still didn't make any effort to take notice of his injury, but now you could at least be sure that he had heard what you had just said.
You were about to give it another shot when Arisu suddenly shouted: "Niragi! Stop this!"
"I'll do what I want, okay?!", came the prompt reply, "You're just like me! When you open your mouths, you only talk about yourselves, you don't give a shit about anyone else! You hear that, sunshine? It's all bullshit! He doesn't care about you, he's not capable of caring about anyone, just like me!"
You and Chishiya seemed to breathe in tandem. Still his dark eyes held you captive, but the longer the eye contact lasted and the longer Niragi talked, the more it felt like your lifeline was slowly unraveling itself. All of a sudden his eyes seemed to challenge you, as if to say: "See, I told you. I'm horrible, just like him. I deserve this." It made you frown and press your mouth into a thin line.
"Chishiya, Arisu, stop acting like you're better than everyone else just because you've seen some people die. And don't give me that old 'oh, I'm doing it for someone else', people like us can only think of ourselves! The only thing that matters is that we come out on top!"
It occurred to you that just yesterday, you had said something similar and equally as horrible to Chishiya in a fit of rage. But if he thought that this gave him the perfect excuse... That this gave him the right to one-man this, then he was sorely mistaken. Because unlike Niragi, you knew better by now and had actually done so for quite some time, it just took you a while to realize it. And now you would make Chishiya realize it too, no matter the cost.
However, Arisu stole your thunder yet again before you could even open your mouth.
"Yes... Maybe you're right. Maybe we're all just supposed to kill each other in this place..."
...What?! Your gaze automatically shifted in the direction of his voice. Arisu, no! That's the absolute wrong conclusion! Alarmed, you looked back at Chishiya, but he, too, had turned his head away again. Shit! You couln't lose him now…!
"So you're finally coming around, huh?", Niragi exclaimed, noticeably pleased at what he had just heard.
No, no, no, no... Arisu, you fool!
But then he raised his voice again: "...That's why, right here, we have to change, Niragi. I know what you're trying to do, you're trying to wear me down! Except now... it won't work. I'm not gonna act weak and selfish ever again!"
You didn't know when, but at some point your hand had grabbed Chishiya's arm again and was now giving him a light squeeze in support. But if he perceived it, he didn't let it show. Instead, he suddenly seemed deep in thought; Arisu's words seemed to have transported him far, far away from you, to a place you would not be able to reach on your own. All you could do now was hope that there he would finally discover the truth behind his answers.
"I'm out", Arisu said, "I'm not falling for these sick games again. I'm not gonna pull this trigger just so that I can survive!"
You listened intently and with a pounding heart to what was happening behind your cover, but for a long time it remained silent. You were about to raise your head to look through the glass when Niragi suddenly muttered: "Ah, fuck this... You ruined the mood. Thanks a lot, asshole."
Relieved, you leaned your head against the metal behind you, closed your eyes and took a deep breath. The situation seemed defused. Arisu had actually done it... If you didn't feel so weak all of a sudden, you would run right up to him and give him the biggest bear hug ever, but as it stood, that would have to wait.
When you opened your eyes again, they immediately met Chishiyas'. Involuntarily, a relieved smile spread across your face, until-
"Arisu? What... is this...?"
Until time stopped.
The rustling of the leaves in the wind died down, insects froze in mid-flight and the world stopped spinning. The smile on your face was wiped away in an instant as you slowly turned your head until you finally saw Usagi standing there, just a few meters away. She was dressed in her typical sporty tank top, but for the first time you were struck by how little protection it offered; her bare arms and shoulders seemed to especially stand out as she began to knead her hands, obviously trying to get a read on the situation. Suddenly she seemed like a child to you... Innocent, defenseless and above all vulnerable.
And you instinctively knew that her appearance had ruined everything.
"Oh yeah, I almost forgot about you", Niragi said, dangerously slow.
And then all hell broke loose as he opened fire again, only this time on Usagi.
You saw her dodge the first bullets, heard Arisu call her name and then furiously yell at Niragi. You wanted to rush to her aid yourself, but before you could get to your feet, Chishiya suddenly grabbed your arm and held you in place. Annoyed, you spun around to him, yelling at him to let go, while your hands tried to loosen the grip of his fingers, but to no avail. His attention was solely on Usagi and only Usagi...
"Games need a heroine to rescue, don't you think?", Niragi shouted, "But this one should die... Because if she dies, everything can go back to the way it was and I don't have to be alone anymore! You hear me? You just get in the way!!!"
As soon as he had finished, it seemed to you as if someone had pressed a fast-forward button.
Suddenly, Chishiya's hand around your arm disappeared, causing you to tumble backwards, taking away any and all opportunity to stop him now, as he suddenly shot past you, heading for Usagi. But you didn't want to admit defeat just yet, you couldn't admit defeat, so you got back up as quickly as possible to run after him, your gaze firmly trained on his blond hair, his name on your lips-
Two more shots rang out.
Or maybe it was just one, you couldn't tell. After all, all of your attention was on the man who had just thrown himself in front of Usagi and then went down, motionless. In that same moment his name finally left your lips in a broken scream.
His body was only a few meters away, yet it felt like whole continents were separating you. And when you finally reached him, the world had suddenly shrunk down to just the two of you; Arisu, Usagi and everything else suddenly became only white noise to you.
This time you didn't waste a single second and put down your backpack to dug out a pack of tissues. This whole process seemed to take forever because your hands were shaking like a leaf, but finally you held it in your hands and immediately emptied its contents. Then you pushed his jacket aside and pressed the tissues onto the bleeding wound.
But it was ridiculous how little it helped. Within seconds, of course, the cloths were already soaked with blood. How could you have ever thought that a few tissues could stop the bleeding of a bullet wound?! Stupid, stupid, stupid! You cursed yourself before flinging the tissues aside and reaching for your shirt to pull it over your head- when you suddenly felt the familiar grip of a hand on your arm again and stilled.
Chishiya looked at you and shook his head gently. "Stop that."
"...No! You stop that!", you retorted heatedly, "Stop fucking talking! You... You are dumb and bleeding, you don't get to talk!"
You didn't even realize what you were saying before you pulled the shirt over your sports bra and head after all and then pressed it onto the wound. Only then did you allow yourself to take a shaky breath.
"Chishiya, you... You saved me!", Usagi cried in the next moment, "Why...? Why did you do that??"
She was kneeling next to you now, leaning over Chishiya just like you did. Arisu was also at your side, you noticed. But right after that, your attention was solely trained on the man before you again.
"I thought... I'll just try something new", he breathed out and then chuckled, which turned into a coughing fit. You were about to tell him to shut up again, when he continued: "It's because of the people I've had the pleasure of meeting here, I guess. Like... Like Kuzuryu. Or you, Arisu." His eyes darted in your direction. "...Or you."
You felt your vision blur and quickly rubbed at your eyes before pressing down on his wound again. "Shut up."
"Still so damn emotional..." He smirked and then closed his eyes with a sigh.
You felt panic take hold of you and take your breath away. Your heart was beating so fast, it felt like it was going to jump out of your chest. But then his eyelids fluttered open again and he looked at Arisu.
"You know...", he began to speak again, although much more quietly, almost in a whisper; it was obviously painful for him and you had to greatly resist the urge of telling him once again to shut up, "Sincere people always seemed pretty stupid to me. I... I couldn't help it, I just had to make fun of their diligence and eagerness. I couldn't get by without hurting someone. I always hated selflessness..." Again his eyes flitted in your direction. "…Your good will and intentions. But... it was probably because I was jealous. Because these were all things I was missing. In the end" He chuckled again. "In the end it was really me who's pathetic and small minded, wasn't it?"
He breathed shakily and looked up at the sky, before adding: "An interest in life, the will to change... I never had that. Why do I even live? To what purpose? Questions like that were always on my mind. It seemed like... I existed solely to show just how empty a human can be."
After he finished, there was a heavy silence between you and your head was empty and full at the same time. His words seemed to echo all around it, again and again and again... And suddenly the Chishiya-puzzle seemed to come together before your inner eye. It was still far from complete, of course, but suddenly everything made so much more sense. The apathy, his strange indifference to everything, but especially to his own life; his aloofness and the walls he had erected around himself; that he had so desperately wanted to make you see him as the asshole he saw himself as... Every single shared memory suddenly seemed to have taken on a new meaning, and for a moment you were so overwhelmed that you almost forgot to keep pressing on his wound.
"I understand", you heard Arisu murmur.
Chishiya's mouth twisted into a weak smile. "I knew you'd say that."
You lifted your head and looked from one to the other. There seemed to be a wordless conversation happening between them, some kind of... silent agreement. Then Chishiya closed his eyes again and his face relaxed. You waited for him to speak once more, like last time, but your wait was in vain. Realizing this, your heart began to race again and you looked back and forth between Usagi and Arisu in panic, but they looked just as helpless as you felt. When Niragi's voice suddenly sounded behind you and Arisu jumped to his feet in alarm, you didn't even really register it; he sounded far too weak anyway to be a serious danger to you anymore.
So you simply ignored him and instead leaned forward and said in a shaky voice: "H-hey! Chishiya, don't you dare die on me here, understand?? This is not how this ends!"
The relief that flooded your heart when he opened his mouth instantly died down again at his next words: "Probably not... But it probably won't take much longer. I may have a few more hours, maybe half a day left..."
"You-you're a doctor!", you exclaimed, "Tell me what to do!"
The corner of his mouth twitched. "I'm not a doctor yet, remember? But even if I was, there's likely internal damage... Without the proper facilities in this place it looks pretty... bleak for me, I'd say..."
Your mind was whirling as you searched for a way out that didn't exist, but you refused to face the fact. So far there had always been one, every game had had a solution...! Your head jerked up and your eyes wandered once more over the many buildings and rows of shops all around you. You would bet that somewhere among those was something that could help you out. A pharmacy perhaps, or... or another ambulance! But you didn't want to leave Chishiya alone either.
So you turned to Usagi and were just about to tell her to stay here with Chishiya while you would go and look for help-
When suddenly there was a loud rumbling and fluttering in the wind before a huge shadow began to cloud the crossing. As if in slow motion you turned your head and stared at the blimp hovering menacingly towards you.
The King of Spades.
You stared at the flying monster with wide eyes and were suddenly frozen still, like a wild animal in the headlights. You didn't dare breathe or move even the smallest muscle, as if the crowned face would then overlook you, maybe.
"Run... Run!", you could hear Arisu calling from behind before he sprinted back to you and pulled Usagi to her feet.
But you only woke up from your stupor when the first screams rang out. Not long after they were already pouring into the crossing as people came running, obviously fleeing from something-
Gunshots. Lots of them.
Blood rushed in your ears as you looked down at Chishiya and at the same time became aware of one horrible fact: He wouldn't be able to escape with you.
Run!
"No, Arisu! Wait!", you pleaded quickly, "Please- Help me get Chishiya to safety first! Please!"
To your relief he nodded straightaway and together you dragged the wounded man behind one of the cars. There was not much time left for anything else; already the chaos was all around you and the King, thus, not far away. Regardless, Arisu then ran to Niragi to hide him as well, which seemed absolutely crazy to you, but you got far more important things to worry about now.
When he and Usagi finally stood before you again and tried to get you to flee with them, you just shook your head vehemently. "No, I'll stay, I- I got to look after him. Please, stay safe you two, all right?"
You knew they weren't exactly thrilled by this decision, but as time was working against you now, in the end they had no choice but to accept your wishes if they didn't want to end up as targets for the King.
"You stay safe, okay?", Usagi sniffled, before pulling you in a quick hug.
Arisu gave you a determined nod. "We'll come find you again."
You returned the gesture, albeit biting your cheek to keep from bursting into tears as the two of them finally took off. To distract yourself, you immediately put all your attention on the man next to you again. His upper body was leaning against the car, but still he was more lying than sitting. His face was as pale as his jacket at this point and his body so limp that at first glance one could already think him dead; if not for the barely noticeable rise and fall of his chest.
At least he's still breathing... But for how long...? That did it and you could no longer prevent the single tear making its way down your cheek.
The loud screams and the constant gunfire in the background nearly made you miss Chishiya's next words: "Why... didn't you go with them?"
You lifted your head and noticed him looking at you from beneath heavy eyelids. "I'm not leaving you here."
"And you call me dumb?"
You stared at him. "Well, it's not me who's literally bleeding to death and still insists on talking your ear off, now is it? Instead of- I don't know, saving my strenght maybe??"
"...I'm trying to stay awake, actually." He smiled wryly.
That made you shut your mouth. "Well,", you finally grumbled, "Keep talking then."
Chishiya's soft chuckle made your heart soar, but this serene moment didn't last very long; shortly after, a woman suddenly ran past you and took a bullet to the head only a few meters away. She hadn't even been able to scream, instead she just collapsed on the spot and lay motionless on the ground while a scarlet puddle formed around her head.
For a short moment you felt unable to take your eyes off her, then you became accutely aware of your dicey situation: The King had to be close by and if he found you, there wouldn't be much you could do to avert your fate.
"Shit, shit, shit, shit", you hissed to yourself as you racked your brain.
Your gaze fell on the car behind you. Should you seek shelter in there? But would you even have enough strength to move Chishiya along? Did you even have enough time left for that? And what if the King found you anyway, what then? Then you would be trapped! No, that was not the solution. Should you play dead...? Would he then maybe just ignore the two of you? Should you take this risk?
You tasted blood as you bit your lip.
...No, none of that would work. You had to come up with something else. Come on! Think, girl!
The throbbing in your ears was like a drum concert at this point, when you finally set your sights on your backpack. And then, wasting no time, you reached for Chishiya's hand and pressed it to the fabric on his wound, replacing your own.
"Press down, okay?", you implored him and, not waiting for a response, reached for your backpack.
Your bloody fingers kept slipping off the zipper, so you unceremoniously lifted it to your mouth and ripped it open with your teeth. Then you grabbed one of the bombs. It was a simple spray can with a few wires and a fuse sticking out of it and felt cool to the touch. Then you pricked up your ears and turned your head in the direction of the King. Shortly thereafter, you could already hear heavy footsteps on the concrete.
By now you thought you could feel your own heartbeat on your tongue. You nervously let it slide over your bleeding lip while you started to panic about when you should best send the bomb off. You didn't want to attack him with it, of course you didn't, because that would be high-key stupid and the bomb wasn't strong enough, anyway. No, you wanted to use it as a distraction, to keep him away from you. But if you threw it too early, maybe it would fail to capture his attention and he would stay the course. If you threw it too late, however, you would probably give away your hiding place.
You briefly closed your eyes and slowly breathed in and out as you continued to listen for his footsteps. Then you counted to three before you stood up, pulling on the string in the process, and finally threw the bomb over the car roof.
It exploded at the exact same moment several bullets flew past where your head had just been mere seconds ago. You quickly slid back down again and pressed yourself against the sheet metal next to Chishiya, where you subsequently tried to make yourself as small as possible.
Shit! He saw me...! What am I supposed to do now?!
You were about to hyperventilate when Chishiya suddenly muttered: "Please tell me, you didn't just waste one of my bombs..."
Although your situation could not have been worse, you had the strange urge to laugh, but could only manage a stifled sob. The King had discovered where you were hiding. You had, at most, half a minute left before he would step around the car and finish you off.
You pressed your trembling lips together and felt sweat run into your eyes. You unconsciously wiped it away, only to find that it wasn't sweat at all, but blood; your head wound had reopened.
For what seemed like an eternity, you just stared at the palm of your hand, where your blood mixed with that of Chishiya. You watched it pool between your fingers and then drip onto the concrete below. There it would seep between the cracks in the concrete, just like the blood of the woman who had died a few meters away. Perhaps it would all mix underground… Our blood and the woman's, with that of Kuzuryu, of the Jack of Spades and his friends, and with that of all those who had died in the witch-hunt... The Borderlands were basically one huge grave and in the end, you would all find together again.
Was this the meaning of that one saying? "United in death"...?
...
...No.
"Live on."
No, it would not end like this. And even if it did, then not without one last fight, not without having tried, one last time, to find another way out of this hopeless situation. If everything was to end here, then not like this. You didn't want to look your own death in the eye, all huddled and cornered.
So, with newfound determination, you tensed every muscle in your body as your fingers wrapped around the second bomb, your only physical weapon in this fight. You had no concrete idea how you were going to use it, but as you sat there, every nerve strained to the limit, sweating blood and tears, you were ready for anything to end this nightmare once and for all.
But suddenly a clear voice cut through your tense thoughts:
"Hey! Yeah, you, you son of a bitch! How about you stand your ground for once and don't hide behind your oh-so-great weapons, huh??"
You blinked and turned your head. Immediately your heart stopped when you saw the King's hood looming over the car. He was only an arm's length or two away, just a couple more steps and he would be right in front of you...!
"Almost seems like you're overcompensating a bit there, my friend, don't you think?", the loud voice continued, and it was only then that you registered it as...
Suit-guy??
And indeed there he was, one of your teammates from the Jack of Spades game, standing further down the road on the roof of a car, waving his arms wildly. But not for long, because not one second later he got what he had wanted, and the King opened fire on his new target. The slim man immediately jumped down from the car and took cover.
Simultaneously, in the same vicinity, tattoo-guy suddenly jumped out from wherever he had been hiding and yelled: "Ha! You shoot as slow as my grandpa shits!"
In an instant the King jerked his gun around once more and the muscleman went into hiding again. By now, the King completely ignored you and Chishiya in favor of hunting your two teammates. You could hardly believe your luck, not until suddenly two figures emerged somewhere to your left and came running towards you, crouching down once they reached you.
Your eyes widened.
"Kuina?!"
Instead of responding she just pulled you in a tight embrace. At her side was Miki, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand before giving you a sly smile.
"Hi there. Thought you were rid of us, huh?" At that she also pulled you into her arms for a moment. "You're gonna have to try a little harder than that, girl."
You shook your head in bewilderment and looking back and forth between the two women. "But what... I mean, I... How-"
Kuina nodded towards Chishiya. "In a moment. Tell me what's wrong with him first. Hey, Chishiya!", she then turned to her former partner, "Are you still alive?"
He raised his hand in greeting. "Disappointed…?"
The woman snorted. Then she took a closer look at his wound before raising her eyebrows at you in alarm. "What's the situation?"
You explained what had happened. Meanwhile, Miki had turned her head toward the gunfire and was keeping watch.
"Shit", Kuina hissed after you had finished, clenching her hands into fists. Her unblinking gaze was fixed on Chishiya.
"Yeah, shit", you agreed quietly.
"You're such an idiot, Chishiya, you know that? Hard to believe I once thought you were the smarter one."
He simply chuckled at that.
You gave them both some time to themselves and turned to the other woman. "Miki, I'm so sorry-"
"Don't", she cut you off, albeit with a smile, "I'd probably have done the same for the person I care about." Her gaze moved from you to Chishiya and back again, somehow making you blush despite the serious situation.
"All right...", you mumbled, "Thank you. I just... How did you find us?"
"Oh, that was easy, we just followed the blimps. There are two games left, the King of Spades and the Queen of Hearts. They're both here, in Shibuya, so everyone automatically heads over here", she repeated Chishiya's prior assessment before nodding towards Kuina, "This one overheard us talking about wanting to distract the King from you guys and offered us her help. Which we could hardly refuse after she told us that she knew you guys."
"I... I don't know what to say, I..." You looked anxiously in the direction of the gunfire.
Miki shook her head. "Don't sweat it, really. We were happy to help, every single one of us. You two saved our asses, so now we'll save yours. That's how it works." She nodded her head resolutely, then smiled again. "Nobody dies today!"
Kuina laughed loudly. "Couldn't have said it better myself! So" She turned her head back to her wounded friend. "You heard her, Chishiya! No dying, all right?" He just raised an eyebrow in response, but she seemed satisfied nonetheless. Afterwards she turned to you again. "You keep watching over him, yeah?"
"You're not staying?" You didn't know why you had thought the two women would stick around. There was absolutely no point to that. Nevertheless you felt your throat tighten once Kuina nodded.
"I wished I could. But I'm sure the others need all the help they can get. And you're reasonably safe here now. Besides... The faster we get out of here, the sooner Chishiya will get the help he needs."
You had no objection to that, so you simply forced a brave nod, yet couldn't stop your eyes from welling up once again. After all, at this point, any goodbye could be forever.
Suddenly you remembered something though and quickly blinked away the tears before reaching for your backpack. "Kuina, wait. Take this, it's a bomb that Chishiya-"
"Ah, no need", she interrupted you with a raised hand, "I got one of my own. Keep it, you'll probably need it more than me anyway."
"Oh... okay."
Kuina smiled gently at you and reached for your hand. "Hey. Have faith! We'll defeat this bastard, then I'll come find you, and once the Queen has kicked the bucket as well, we'll leave this place. All of us, together. Once and for all."
"Okay." You returned her smile.
She squeezed your hand comfortingly. Then she also briefly put her hand on Chishiya's arm, before standing up and patting the dust off her jeans. "So! Nobody dies until I get back, you hear me? Chishiya, don't you dare, or I'm gonna kick your ass into the next fucked up world, got it?"
He smiled wryly. "I'll keep it in mind..."
"We got this, you can count on us!", Miki said and stepped next to Kuina who nodded resolutely.
"Take care!", she shouted over her shoulder as the two of them were heading off.
"You too!", you called after them.
Due to you sitting on the ground, you quickly lost sight of them and all of a sudden you felt more alone than ever before. You quickly turned your attention back to Chishiya to distract yourself.
"Tell me, is this your way of flirting? Giving women homemade bombs?"
He snorted. "Only those I trust can handle it."
"Gee, thanks."
"...Which actually rules you out, after that fiasco from earlier."
You fake-gasped. "Hey! I did my best, okay? It was a stressful situation!"
"That was your 'best'...? Should've told Kuina to stay behind in your stead..."
"Oh ha, ha." This guy was unbelievable.
You lapsed into amicable silence until there was suddenly a loud explosion down the road. You immediately jerked your head around and craned your neck to maybe see something, but to no avail. It made you press your lips together in concern.
"...You know, a little while ago I was wondering what your teammates all had in common...", Chishiya then muttered, "Now I know. They got your knack for self-sacrifice."
"Welcome to the club then", you immediately teased before falling silent once again.
You could feel his heavy gaze on you as you stared down at your bloody hands. The contrast between them and the white fabric of his jacket was more than disconcerting.
As someone who seemed to magnetically attract dirt and grime, especially when you were wearing light-colored clothes, you had always been envious of those who managed to keep their clothes looking fresh out of the washing machine, day in and day out. And Chishiya had been the worst offender you ever met, by far. The Borderlands were rough and wild and dirty. No one in this world really cared about their appearance, because what did it even matter in the face of your imminent death? And yet... No game had ever managed to stain Chishiya's white clothes. As if all the dirt in the world had simply… bounced off him. And that was also how he had behaved, basically, completely uncaring of everything.
Pretty apt that all it took was the reversal of this that, for the first time, made him look like a real Borderlands player now.
You shook your head. "What... What were you thinking...?"
He studied your face for a few seconds. "Like I said, I just wanted to try something new for-"
Immediately you shook your head more vehemently. "'Try something new' could have also been to simply talk Niragi down from this insanity. I just..." You searched for the right words in your muddled brain. "What changed...? Just yesterday you said it was stupid and selfish to risk your life for someone else and now-"
"Maybe I just wanted to take your place."
"...What?"
He averted his gaze. "Aren't you glad Usagi is still alive?"
"Wha-?“ This conversation gave you whiplash. „I... Of course I am! She's my friend."
"Yeah, well. If it wasn't for me she'd be dead by now."
"I know!", you replied and furrowed your brows, "I know, all right? And I'm glad she's safe, but that doesn't make you dying okay!"
Chishiya gave you a quick sideways glance. "You do know that it's not the recommended course of action to tell a dying person the truth about their condition, right...? All this will accomplish is that they will already give up mentally while their body is still fighting for survival."
You just scowled at him.
"…Besides, do you really want to argue with me while I'm bleeding out...?"
"You're such a pain in the ass, you know that?"
He hummed. "No point in crying over me then."
For a few long seconds all that could be heard was the occasional scream of anguish and gunfire as you stared into each other's eyes. Then you simply said: "Stop it."
"Stop what?", he asked, feigning innocence.
"It!", you burst out, "That! Being... Being horrible just so that I stop caring! Because let me tell you once again, it won't work."
Chishiya snorted. "Well, you should let it. Why fuss about an inevitability anyway? It's not like me dying has any real bearing on your life."
Your jaw dropped. Was he actually serious with this shit…?!
"'Why'?", you repeated when you had regained your voice, "I don't know, maybe because I'm a decent fucking human being? Just because you don't value your life doesn't mean others don't either!"
You took a shaky breath and willed yourself to stay calm. So much for 'he changed'... Changed into an even bigger asshole maybe.
"...You're angry", he stated the obvious after a brief pause.
"Well, yeah! Of course I am angry! I just... I just don't get you. You're fucking dying right now and yet you're still dodging my questions! I mean... God!", you exclaimed in frustration, "You said it yourself, you have a few hours left at most and then that's it. I..." You slumped your shoulders. "...I just want to understand, is all. I think you owe me that much."
You were aware that this sounded pretty conceited. He didn't owe you anything, especially not after he had literally saved your life yesterday. And yet, a part of you just couldn't help but feel like you were in the right, irrationally. After all, in the last few days he had been constantly telling you that you wanting to save others and risking your life for them was the most foolish thing. And now he went and took a bullet for Usagi...? Of course this made you feel like he was fucking with you!
You didn't expect an answer, though.
So it surprised you all the more when he suddenly said: "You're right."
He reciprocated your eye contact. "Until yesterday I thought putting your own life on the line to save someone else was pretty idiotic. And don't get me wrong, part of me still thinks that – at least as far as you're concerned."
"Hey-!"
"But then", he unceremoniously cut you off while looking straight ahead, at a point you couldn't see, "I was granted a... change of perspective, I guess you could say. Kuzuryu's death helped me realize some things. For example, that every life is worth living. And that it's up to each person to decide the how."
After he had finished, you remained silent for a while and let his words sink in. Then you squinted your eyes. "So your new perspective is that it's okay for you to sacrifice yourself for others, but not for me...?"
He snorted in amusement. "Of course this is your only take away..."
"No, I mean… That's just a pretty egregious double standard if you ask me. That's all."
Chishiya looked at you again. Still a slight smile played around his mouth. "You know... You remind me of him, actually. Kuzuryu."
Ah, a Chishiya classic, (slightly) changing the subject. "Oh yeah?", you asked, a little snippy, "Why? Because I, too, enjoy sending others to their deaths just to satisfy my own curiosity?"
He hummed. "No, because you are both so idealistic that it borders on naiveté. And…“ He paused. „Because both of you… made me think about change."
All background noise died down, all violence, all chaos gone in an instant. There was only you and him now, as he continued: "I've always felt kind of... detached from the world. Bored. Stagnant. I may have grown up financially well off, but believe me, to me this couldn't have mattered less. In fact, it made life even emptier. There was nothing but too many rooms and an endless queue of nannies and teachers, as far back as I can remember..."
He went quiet for a short while before continuing: "I followed my father into medicine because I wanted to find out what it truly means, the big 'concept of life'. What makes others so excited about its many challenges, so invested in its course... even if it's all going downhill. Even if they have no control over it. I... For the longest time, for most of my life, I didn't understand my own existence, you could say.
And then I came here and straightaway recognized this as a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. Maybe here I would finally get the answers I had been looking for for so long, in a world that was as much of a mystery to me as it was to others. Everything laid bare here, every intention, every emotion, every facet of life. There was no boredom to be found, everything was constantly moving, and it was rough and ugly and real. It made me curious, some would say... reckless, even. I put it all on the line, my own survival, in search for the answers to-"
He broke off and at first you assumed he had finished talking, but suddenly his body was shaken by a violent cough. Sheer horror gripped your heart when he sat up again and you saw a red trickle dripping from his mouth.
"Oh my go- Chishiya, please stop talking! You-"
But he ignored you. "It's like I told you all after Niragi shot me, I... was never a morally good person. In fact, I was pretty awful to others, all my life. I used them, abused them, manipulated and lied. All the while feeling like the most hollow being on this earth. Yet I couldn't find it in me to change. I just didn't... see the point..." He cleared his throat. "Coming to this world, I set out to learn what a life is worth. If there truly is merit to the idea that some human beings matter more than others. Kuzuryu's sacrifice helped me see the truth." The corner of his mouth twitched. "And then Arisu set it in stone, I guess..."
You slowly sat back as he trailed off again.
Of course, you had no insight into his mind. Of course, he could have told you only half the truth again, or even another fat lie. But instinctively you knew that that wasn't the case this time. And you also realized another thing: The Chishiya puzzle you had been putting together in your mind remained incomplete – you actually had a strong feeling that this was an impossible task even, unsolvable even if you would've been granted a whole lifetime together – but that didn't really bother you anymore. What he had wanted to share with you was enough, at least for the moment.
Early on, it had already been pretty clear to you that Chishiya had placed a much greater value on finding answers than worrying about his own survival. He had once even directly expressed as much to you by saying that he actually found it quite amusing to leave his life up to fate. Hence your impression that he had only really been living to find out what would happen next. His cool and detached manner had probably made it all the easier to study others and get an idea of how they thought and acted. He had been an observer, first and foremost, on a quest for understanding. And once he had figured it all out, once he had figured out that people did indeed deserve to live... It ironically cost him his own life.
This last thought felt so suffocating, you automatically looked for your lifeline again. When you found it, his eyes seemed to burn directly into your soul.
"...and you showed me that even this rule has its exceptions."
You were so shaken up that at first you didn't really know what to think about that last statement. It showed signs of a quip, yet in context, this sounded pretty unlikely...
"I don't understand-", you started, but he interrupted you once again.
"For some reason…" He sighed deeply, as if this realization was even more troubling to him than the bullet in his chest. "…I have a bigger problem with you playing the hero than everyone else, least of all myself. For some reason, I recognize now that everyone deserves to live... yet you deserve it even more."
Your mind replayed these words like a continuous loop, over and over again. And still you couldn't seem to grasp their meaning. What was he saying...? What did he mean by 'you deserve it more'? More like... himself? Was he trying to say that he put your life before his? Had he only thrown himself in front of Usagi because you wanted to...? If so, that was definitely not the conclusion you had wanted him to reach. Oh no, definitely not.
"Chishiya, I..."
You looked down at your hands again, at all the blood... Your breath caught in your throat. Was this... your fault? Were you responsible for this? Had you failed again...? Your lower lip began to quiver.
"Hey. Talk to me."
You raised your head and looked at Chishiya before his features blurred. "I... This is not what I wanted. At all", you uttered, "This is... Oh my god, no, I'm so sorry, I- I didn't want this and I-"
Suddenly Chishiya raised his hand and flicked your forehead.
You instantly stopped babbling and stared down at him, completely astonished.
"W-What was that about??", you stammered out, rubbing over the spot in question.
He rolled his eyes at you. "That was me trying to stop your little freak-out. I don't know what your little head has cooked up again, but believe me, this is not your fault. If it were, then I could have very well kept everything I just told you to myself."
You were still pouting a little, but could actually think somewhat clearly again. It was unbelievable, really. Even now he managed to read you like an open book. You on the other hand, struggled all the more to get a read on his intentions.
"What the- Then what did you mean by-...?"
And suddenly it dawned on you.
Oh…
Was he serious…? You looked him in the eyes and couldn't stop your mouth from falling open.
Oh.
He raised his eyebrows. "You can be pretty slow on the uptake, you know that?"
You immediately felt your face getting hot. Suddenly it was as if you were inside a vacuum. Your whole body seemed to be under pressure and you had, one again, difficulty breathing, let alone thinking.
So you just blurted out the first thing that came to your mind: "Well, and you can be pretty... confusing!"
It was true, but that didn't make this response any less lame.
His mouth quirked into a contagious smirk. This elation, however, only lasted until your gaze got caught on the Queen's blimp again.
"That's actually rather mean, you know. Telling me this, here and now." Your smile grew sad. "Pretty unfair."
You could hear him sigh. "Well, like I said... Neither of us deserves this."
You sat in complete silence for a while. Only then did you notice that the gunfire in the background had also stopped, but the blimp of the King of Spades still hung clearly visible in the sky, so he couldn't have bitten the dust yet. You should be more worried, should wonder about your friends... Should be worrying about what to do in case the King came back. But all of that seemed strangely unimportant all of a sudden. You didn't even have the strength to feel bad about it.
Instead, you were suddenly far too aware of the feverish sheen in Chishiya's eyes and how warm his blood felt.
You sniffled and then, trying very hard to make your voice sound firm, said: "You wanted to know why I care, right? Why I couldn't just... move on? Well, yes. In part, it's just the decent thing to do, like I said. But it's also that..." You took a deep breath. "In her last moments, my sister told me to 'live on'."
This had not been meant for this moment, originally, nor for the Borderlands in general. All this time, this had been something you had been saving for your victorious return to the real world, afraid, it would throw you off track when you could least afford it. But now the only thing that flashed through your mind was: This moment is as good as any, really.
Chishiya simply listened as you continued, laughing a little: "I guess I... I always kind of struggled with what she meant by that? I thought I would honor her by just winning as many games as I could and then finding a way out of here. Only recently, however, did I realize... that I was really barking up the wrong tree there, because I confused living with just surviving, you know? But living, truly living, is so much more than that, isn't it? It's not only about staying alive, it's... finding something, or someone, that gives meaning to our existence.
I realize that now. That she wanted me to move on and really live. For me. In the way I want to. It's strange, don't you think?", you laughed, "If you think about it... As cruel and unforgiving as this world is, it... kind of helped us understand the real world better. I guess they're not so different after all."
"Well... That's some food for thought", Chishiya breathed out.
"That's also me trying to tell you, that I'm not only caring because I feel obligated to, but also because, strangely enough, I started to really like you in the time we spent together." His exhale then turned into a half chuckle. "Believe me, I can't explain it either."
"Seems like the heat really did a number on your head. Should've listened to your doctor and kept your hat."
"Yes, well. He did make some questionable decisions himself so I wouldn't call him the final authority on what is good for my health and what isn't."
He clicked his tongue. "Understandable."
After that you were silent again. Eventually, your head started to hurt again, which you attributed less to you losing your hat, though, and more to your wound reopening. Occasionally, you would wipe the blood from your face when it threatened to drip into your eyes again, but ultimately you gave up altogether. Especially since you suddenly became dizzier and dizzier… But that could also stem from your short, impromptu cry sessions every time reality threatened to overwhelm you.
At some point, there was suddenly a loud bang that seemed all too familiar. And your expectations did not stay unfulfilled; as soon as you had turned your head, you saw the blimp of the King of Spades burst into flames and crash down on the city. At the same time, a loud announcement sounded:
"This is the final game. Participating players should register immediately."
You managed a small smile as you turned to Chishiya to make sure he had seen it, too.
But he had closed his eyes, and for a moment your euphoria turned into naked fear that you missed him dying. Until you noticed his chest moving ever so slightly and exhaled in relief.
"Hey, Chishiya", you then breathed, "They did it, they beat the King! Now there's only one game left and then..."
...Then we can go home.
He opened his right eye a crack. "Is that so... huh. Who would've thought..."
Could you though? Go home...? Chishiya definitely wasn't going anywhere anymore, that much was certain. And you alone wouldn't be able to carry him either. But your friends had promised to come get you... Yes, you would make it, you were sure of it.
But the longer you waited, the more this certainty faded. Every now and then, you found yourself thinking that they should have come by now if they had survived. Of course, it was entirely possible that they didn't notice you among all the broken-down cars, or didn't remember where you were hiding. But if that were the case, they would still come looking for you, right?
However, once the sun kissed the tops of the skyscrapers, you had to, for the first time, face the fact that your optimism would be in vain. You bit your chapped lip at this realization. Even your tears seemed to have dried up – or so you thought.
And then Chishiya toppled over.
"Oh shit...!", you cursed and quickly grabbed his shoulders to hold him in place.
In the process, his head rolled in your direction and landed heavily on your shoulder. You didn't have the strength to position him upright again, so you just allowed his whole body to lean against yours. Finally, the two of you sat side by side, your backs against the rusted car behind you. Chishiya's hair tickled the side of your neck and face as you laid your head back and looked up at the blimp of the Queen of Hearts. Then you quietly started crying again.
"…You could still make it, you know...", you suddenly heard Chishiya mumble against your shoulder.
It tickled which made your chuckle come all the easier.
"Yeah... I don't think so. But even if..." You tilted your head in his direction. "I told you already, you won't get rid of me."
He only mumbled something unintelligible in reply before leaning even more of his weight on you. It was almost like he snuggled up against you, but you were sure he was just looking for a more comfortable sitting position. It probably made dying a lot easier.
You took a sharp breath. "Chishiya? I don't think it was us – Kuzuryu, Arisu and me, that is – who gave you your answers."
"...No?"
You gently shook your head. "No. That was all you. And that you were looking for them in the first place. You wanted to know what was at the end of this road, that was your drive, all the way through. At all cost. You literally risked everything for this. If that isn't an expression of how much you cared about your own life, then what is…?"
He didn't answer, but you knew he had heard you, so you continued: "So maybe... In this strange world, where nothing is as it seems and where there's no laws of nature and time is nothing but a concept... Maybe you can also will yourself to stay alive."
Of all the things you had imagined, you had not expected him to start laughing after your last words. It was a pleasant sound, deep and contagious and you instantly longed for more.
"Well, I can give it a shot…", he finally said once his laughter had subsided, "But don't blame me if it doesn't work."
At that you had to laugh as well. Maybe this was that infamous gallows humor that you had heard so much about. It was a wonder, really, that this hadn't happened sooner. But, well. You had never been in a shittier situation, after all.
You watched as the giant Queen of Hearts card blew lazily in the evening wind and the last rays of sunlight disappeared behind tall glass. Briefly, it occurred to you that perhaps the Queen was waiting for you... What if no one had survived the King of Spades except you two? What if the announcement earlier had been directed at you and now no one would complete the last game? What if the citizens would win in the end…? What would happen then? Would the Queen of Hearts rule over a huge mass grave for all eternity?
A dead kingdom... It was a terrible thought, but at the same time, it filled you with a certain satisfaction. You knew what it meant to be alone. If that truly were the case, then there would be no worse fate for her. Maybe it's meant to be then, maybe we're all meant to lose...
"You're a wonder to me."
You frowned, your gloomy thoughts still at the forefront of your mind. "What was that…?"
"It kept me awake, you know...", he continued and you got the sense that he was talking more to himself than to you, "Every night... Because I just couldn't figure it out, figure you out. Why you haunted my thoughts for days on end, why I started to look at you differently... Behaved differently when I was around you. It drove me nuts. And I hated that, I really did... That all of a sudden there was yet another puzzle I couldn't solve."
You listened to his mumbly confession and with each word your heart grew lighter and heavier at the same time.
"You made me feel better and so much worse. So I did what I've always done... I tried to cause hurt. Tried to push you away, make you feel even worse than me. And at first this was easy because it was in my nature... But then you were really gone and I felt... the worst I'd ever felt."
He coughed again and it rattled your whole body. "...I guess what I want to say is... that I still don't really understand any of this, really. And I probably never will. But... I can accept that now. Not every puzzle needs solving. Or wait, what's this one saying...? Sometimes... there's beauty in the chaos. Yeah, that sounds about right..."
You closed your eyes and took a deep breath to keep yourself from crying again. You had been right, it wasn't fair. Nothing about this was fair.
In your mind, you had already seen the two of you leaving this world together just a few hours ago. And now it would probably still come true… yet in an entirely different sense. And this was both heartbreak and comfort. Your heart ached for the future that would never come. For the life you had changed for, but would miss out on anyway. But at least you were together to the bitter end.
Heavens... How I wished I didn't love you.
Yet it was the only thing that didn't make you lose your mind when, finally, night was falling over the city. At once all the cruelty, all the smoke and all the rubble, all the skeletons of metal and bone disappeared, and with them all the evidence of a world that suddenly seemed light years away. Instead, the dark clouds soon passed, revealing thousands and thousands of stars twinkling above your heads as if there were no tomorrow.
And there wouldn't be, so you unceremoniously rested your head on Chishiya's and decided to just appreciate the view. At least you did, until your eyelids became so heavy that you could no longer keep them open.
In this hazy state of consciousness, half here and half gone, the announcer's robotic voice suddenly sounded like it was coming from far, far away…
"Congratulations. All of the games have now been cleared."
All of a sudden, all kinds of colors lit up behind your eyelids. With great effort, you managed to lift then one last time and blink up at the burning blimp. At the same time, fireworks exploded all over the night sky. They were reflected on the surrounding glass buildings, transforming the world into a sea of roaring, twinkling lights.
A smile played around the corners of your mouth as you took in the spectacle. And a single thought formed in your head:
They did it after all...
You instinctively knew it was the truth. Your friends were tough, and this was undoubtedly their signature.
"All surviving players will be presented with two choices", the incorporeal voice further announced, "Players must now all decide wether to accept permanent residency in this country, or decline it."
This request was repeated one more time, until, once again, there was only the fireworks to be heard.
"I... want to turn it down, I think", Chishiya murmured, so quietly that you wouldn't have heard him if he hadn't muttered the words against your skin, "What about you...?"
Your smile broadened as you closed your eyes one last time.
"I want to live..."
It was that simple and that complicated.
"...so I'm declining."
***
hope you enjoyed thisss<3 as always, feedback is welcome and very much appreciated!!
honestly.....i feel like i have to take a vacay now lmaoo writing this was /harrowing/ but also strangely cathartic aksksk i basically imagined this chapter from the very beginning, esp chishiya and kuina meeting one last time (little fix-it for the show lol) or the JoS teammates all coming in to save the day~! i really hope it reads as exciting as writing it was<33
Summary: After traumatising events, you move to Birmingham and take up work with Shelby Company Limited. You fall for Thomas Shelby without knowing that you already share a bond.
Warning: Incest; Taboo Relationship; PTSD; SMUT
Parts: Preview; One; Two; Three
THE TRAINEE (updated weekly)
Summary: You are a prostitute and move into Arrow House. You will be Tommy’s toy and learn submitting to him.
Warning: Smut with a lack of plot
Parts: One; Two; Three
BUSINESS AS USUAL
Summary: You were forced to marry Thomas Shelby. Will hate turn into love?
Warning: Smut, Arranged Marriage
Parts: One;
UNDER HIS EYE (updated monthly)
Summary: This plays in an AU, dystopian future. It is a mash up between Peaky Blinders and the Handmaid’s Tale where Thomas (a commander) falls in love with his handmaid.
Parts: 1; 2; 3; 4; 5; 6; 7; 8; 9 ; 10
OTHER ONGOING SERIESES:
THE GOOD GIRL - 1; 2; 3; 4 (smut, no plot, loss of virginity)
THE KINKY MAID - 1; 2 (smut, no plot)
ME & THE DEVIL - 1; 2 ; 3; 4 (Mosley x Tommy x Reader)
I think we need to normalize the idea of marrying friends. I don’t mean in a “the best romantic relationships come from the best friendships” type way, though I do believe that’s true. I mean in a “I have zero romantic feelings for you, but I would totally spend the rest of my life committed to a future where you are my primary partner and maybe even raise a family together” type way.
Like, I don’t think it should be an aromantic-exclusive option, or a plan B when you and your best friend are still single at 40 and want to take yourselves out of the dating market.
I’ve heard it mostly as that backup plan, that “if I don’t find anyone, I’ll just marry Trish haha”, and I don’t think that’s even what I’m talking about normalizing. That’s a secondary outcome, seen as “giving up” on finding “real love”, and even if a pair of friends go for it, it’s plagued with this general feeling of “sub par”.
What I mean is that marrying a best friend (or having a committed intimate or emotional platonic relationship) should be seen as just as worth doing as marrying someone you’re in love with. It should be normal for teenagers to try as many committed friendships as they do romantic relationships. It should be normal for someone to say “this is my best friend and if everything works out, maybe we’ll move in together later” or “Trish and I have been roommates for two years now. We’re considering adopting soon, or Trish might carry a child!”
And as an aromantic person, it shouldn’t be strange for me to say “I prefer friendship to romance”. People should hear that and nod their heads like “that’s understandable. John feels the same.”
Hell, I see so many people expressing that they prefer their friends’ company to their romantic partner’s. “My friends understand me better and I think treat me better” and they’re expected to go home to this person, to marry and have kids with this person. It’s bizarre to me. Your platonic feelings for your friend aren’t inferior to your romantic feelings for your boyfriend, and if one of them treats you better than the other, I think you should probably rethink which one is your primary partner.
I also find it strange that it’s not more common in poly spaces for a friend to be considered a legitimate “partner”. In a world where friendships were just as likely to bloom into life partnerships as romantic relationships, I think polyamory would be much more commonplace. “I committed to Josephine about a year ago and now we own a home, but I fell in love with Joe about six months ago and we’re all trying to make it work.” Josephine shouldn’t have to worry about her partner leaving her for Joe just because their bond is romantic and therefore the “sensible” relationship to choose over the other.
I’m just ranting at this point, but I reiterate: committed friendships should not be seen as strange and “sad”, but as a legitimate option for a lifetime commitment. Not just for aromantics like myself, but for everyone. It should just be normal.
And not to be presumptuous, but I don’t think I’m alone in this thinking
spencer through the looking glass (spencer reid/reader)
Title: spencer through the looking glass
Request: no
Couple: spencer/fem!reader
Category: fluff
Content Warning: none that i can think of :)
Word Count: 1658
Summary: spencer ran out of contacts and has to use his glasses.
A/N: this was written for pom’s discord fic swap! It was written for jenna aka @/specialagentsergio ! thank you all so much for the support! i really do appreciate it. check out my masterlist!
{***}{***}{***}
Spencer Reid made a mistake. He hardly ever made mistakes as drastic as this one. It was a mistake he didn’t realize he’d made till it was way too late. But he was so caught up in work and life got in the way… He just forgot. Spencer Reid doesn’t make any mistakes… Except he forgot to order more contacts… It’s even rarer when he forgets something too.
Without his contacts, he was practically blind. He’d worn his contacts one extra day more than he was supposed to. He was so desperate to not have to wear his glasses, he just went about his day without any sort of vision correction… And man did he hate that.
Spencer hated his glasses for multiple reasons. The main reason was they were one of the things he was bullied over when he was a child. So if he didn’t have to wear his glasses, he wouldn’t. Contacts had become his best friend when he got them. He also hated them because they would get smudged by seemingly nothing. And they just seemed… Distracting.
He also hated them because he found them unattractive on himself. And he wanted to look his very best for you.
Summary - Spencer’s had a crush on you for ages, but what will he do when you start to spend more and more time with his unit chief?
Category - hurt/comfort, fluff
Word Count - 4.6k
A/N - This is for @rigatonireid fic challenge with the prompt “I really hate the way you make me love you”. This was really fun to write lmao. Also, ik the timeline's kinda screwed up or some parts may be incoherent but um, ignore that! :)
masterlist
Join my taglist here!
—————————————-
Spencer had seen you around a couple of times. He remembered walking by you so vividly, a memory that was replayed on an endless cycle in his mind. He could remember what your hair looked like, how it bounced as you strode towards him, the subtle floral scent that wafted around him as you walked past him.
It was one of those off days where he would wear his glasses to work instead of his contacts, probably since he hated touching his eyes with his fingers and he just couldn’t bear to do it that day. He walked in with them all fogged up, heart beating fast, face all red from his nerve-wracking crush, and hearts where his eyes should have been.
Derek eventually found out about his feelings for you and teased him about it relentlessly, always joking about how whipped Spencer was for you. Every time you came into the shared breakroom, he would immediately stop what he was doing as his eyes were drawn to you— almost as if you were the center of gravity. His face would turn red and he would start staring at you with large puppy dog eyes that eternally longed for you.
It wasn’t just about your looks, no, you were so much more than that. You were smart, obviously considering you were in the FBI, you were kind, you were radiant in every way possible. No matter how hard he tried, he could never find the courage to talk to you. It was heartbreaking for him to know that you would probably be swept off your feet by someone so much better than him. He even resorted to asking Derek for help, but he could never bring himself to even stand within 5 feet of you much less talk to you— and god forbid ask you out on a date.
He was sitting at a small table in the corner of the breakroom when he heard a door swing open. He ignored it, too enraptured in his book to pay attention to who it was. He had lost all hope of a future with you, so much so that he stopped actively looking for you.
“Excuse me?” His ears perked up as he heard your sweet, saccharine voice behind him. He immediately pushed his chair out, cringing at the screeching of the legs of the piece of furniture made. He stood up, almost knocking you off of your feet if it wasn’t for his quick reflexes. He immediately reached out to grab you as you simultaneously took hold of a nearby chair.
Both of your actions worked to negate the other, causing him to tumble forward onto you as you fell backward onto the table behind you. As the two of you finally stopped falling, he realized the extremely inappropriate position you both were in. Your leg had slid in between his as your knee applied a slight pressure onto his crotch. His poor attempt to steady you moments before backfired with one of his hands on your back, pulling the two of you close together with barely half an inch separating your bodies. His other hand, unfortunately, found its way into the area inside your arm, grabbing the side of your boob.
The two of you made eye contact, his face flushing instantly. “I- I’m so sorry. I-, I just.” His glasses conveniently fell off of his face and onto yours, bouncing off your nose and onto the floor. He gasped as he released his undying grasp on you and moved his body off of you, reaching for his bag to hide his excitement before attempting to find his glasses.
He could barely see as he squinted towards the ground to find any object that had any semblance to the lenses that sat atop his very boopable nose. You realized how lost he was without them so you reached down to grab them for him.
“No, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have come up behind you like that.” You handed him his glasses after you used the end of your blazer to rub off anything that may have gotten on them. You stood up straight and brushed your pants free of any wrinkles that may have formed, tucking strands of your hair behind your ear afterward. He stared at you, in complete shock from what had just occurred.
“Y- You’re from the BAU right?”
“U- um, y- yes.”
An airy giggle slipped out of your lips, you were thoroughly amused at his fluster. “I was going to ask if you could point me in the direction of Agent Aaron Hotchner’s office before, well you know, whatever that was.”
“R- right.” He put his glasses back on and it was like he was just given sight, literally and metaphorically. He was enchanted by your stunning beauty, the lights from behind you giving you a heavenly glow. He continued to stare into your beautiful eyes. They were something that he could get lost in for decades while he basked in your ethereal features for centuries. He began to smile lightly, unaware of your presence even though he was staring at you right in front of him.
He didn’t regain consciousness until you began to awkwardly shift in place. “Uh, e- excuse me?”
He shook his head, internally damning himself to hell. “I- I’m so sorry. Um, yes. Hotch’s office is up the landing through that door.” He pointed to the break room door that led to the bullpen.
“Okay, thank you so much!” You walked away, pushing the door open as you almost bumped into Derek.
“Oh, excuse me.” You gave him a polite smile as you walked away while he walked into the breakroom. Derek turned around to make sure the door was fully closed before he walked to Reid and sat on the edge of the table that he basically groped you on.
He sighed and gave him a disappointed look. “Kid. What. The. Hell. Was. That.”
He cleared his throat and attempted to straighten out his sweater vest and his perpetually crooked tie. “I um, I don’t know what you’re talking a- about.”
An exasperated breath left Derek as he placed two hands back and leaned back on them. “I was walkin’ in for a cup of coffee when I saw you on top of her and I thought ‘damn, he finally did it’. But I should’ve known you and your awkward ass would never have been that assertive.”
His voice raised two octaves, “I- I can be assertive. I am a- assertive.”
“Mhm Mr. ‘can’t even cover my own boner’.”
“Wh- what?” He looked down to see that the bulge in his pants was indeed not covered like he thought it was.
“Reid. C’mon kid. I could feel the tension from outside the door. Just talk to her.”
“I- I can’t Derek. I,” he sighed and flopped down onto the floor as his messenger bag landed on top of his lap to conceal whatever physical manifestation of his feelings were from earlier, “I keep screwing everything up. If I talk to her I’m just going to make a fool of myself. I- I mean she already saw me with a b-, um a… you know. I can’t.”
“Yes, you can. Just think of her as another Ph.D. or degree or something.”
“Wh- what?”
“Yea, you keep getting a shit ton of those. If you just imagine her as a degree, you’d get her in like 2 months.”
“Sh- she’s not an object Derek.”
He got off the table and sat down on the floor across from Spencer. “C’mon, genius. If you worked half as hard to ask her out as you would to get your Ph.D.’s or bachelors or whatever then you’d be all set. It’s all in your big brain, kid. Get out of your head. This is the one thing you don’t have to think about. Because if you do think about it, you’d end up overcomplicating things and we’d have a repeat of whatever the fuck happened here.”
He chuckled, “I- I guess.”
“That’s the spirit. Now let’s get outta here, Hotch is gonna be on our asses if we don’t get back to work.” Spencer nodded as they both got up from the floor, he was stopped by Derek’s hand on his chest.
“You’re good right?” Spencer followed Derek’s eye line down towards his lower half. “Cuz, Reid. As much as I love you, I ain’t coming out of the break room with you and your b-”
“Alright! Alright. I- I’m fine and w- we should go back to work.” He could hear Derek laughing behind him, he always got off on teasing Spencer— not that he minded most of the time. It was nice to have someone who was basically a brother to him.
Spencer used his clothed elbow to push the door open, wary of the multitude of germs that may have resided on it. The only thing that caught his attention was your hymn-like laughs that came from Hotch’s office. He looked up to see the two of you with wide grins on your face as you held what looked like a piece of paper with Hotch’s address and number on it.
Derek could sense Spencer’s distress and wordlessly urged him to go sit on his desk and distract himself with work. From the short distance between the breakroom to his desk, he couldn’t stop looking at the smile on your face— how it looked so genuine and… easy.
And Hotch.
He never smiled.
He knew that you would slip from his fingers, he just didn’t think it would be to his boss. You gave him a hug that sent shivers down Spencer’s spine, he should’ve been the one you were embracing. You gracefully descended the steps of the landing and gave Spencer a polite smile and wave to show your gratitude for showing you where Hotch’s office was.
Derek gave Spencer a pitiful look, one that he brushed off. His comforting hand was denied, swatted away like it was a fly. That was one thing Spencer noticed more and more as he studied behavior, his ability to shut himself in the confines of his mind when he was hurt. It was a coping mechanism… one he was well acquainted with.
—————————————-
His jealousy strained his relationship with Hotch. Every case resulted in Spencer dispersing subtle insults around him like he would plant seeds in the ground… seeds of destruction. You came around the BAU’s office much more than he would have liked. Your heels would click on the ground as you walked up the stairs and into Hotch’s office for lunch almost every day.
He hated seeing you around Hotch. It was infuriating to see your glowing smile directed at another man, a man who wasn’t him. He figured that if he couldn’t keep you from seeing Hotch, he could tarnish your perception of him. Constant undermining and snarky remarks were common when you were around. And when you weren’t? Spencer would ignore Hotch with every fiber in his being, only really talking to him about work-related issues.
His pettiness caused a rift in the team that mimicked the San Andreas fault in California, growing larger every time his temper shook the team dynamic. Hotch was oblivious to Spencer’s childish outbursts, but Derek wasn’t.
“You gotta stop.”
“Stop what?”
Derek sighed, sitting down next to him on the jet. He looked around to check that everyone was still sleeping. “Don’t play dumb. You know what I mean.”
Spencer stayed quiet, he didn’t want to stop screwing with Hotch. It was his way of taking out all the pent-up misery and rejection that he had faced since high school.
“I know you like her, but being rude or snapping at Hotch isn’t going to help. It’s not going to change the fact that…”
Spencer scoffed, “That what? That she doesn’t like me. That she’d much rather go out with Hotch than me, or that she’d rather have a much more fuckable man.”
“You know that’s not true.”
He shook his head and sunk deeper into his chair. “I- I’m just a… a pipe cleaner with eyes, nothing more.”
“C’mon, kids. You know that guy was just trying to make you feel less than because you’re a fed.”
Derek waited for him to answer him, turning his head fully to see the genius with a pout on his lips. Derek felt defeated, leaning back into his chair to think of a way to encourage. He closed his eyes, only to open them moments after as an idea plunked into his brain like a coin in a piggy bank.
One thing everyone knew about Spencer was that he was a competitive son of a bitch. He’d do anything to prove he was right, he’d do anything to win. He also knew that the young doctor intentionally fished for compliments to receive the attention that he never got as a child. He was always hungry for validation.
Derek smiled, his eyes still closed. “You know what? You’re right, you are just a pipe cleaner with eyes.” Spencer shot up from his seat, looking at Derek with shock written all over his face.
“You have no spine, kinda like those inflatable things flopping around at car washes. I keep telling you to figure out how to gain some kinda confidence, but you never listen. You’re always such a stubborn son of a bitch. Absolutely. No. Spine.”
He could practically hear the steam blowing out of Spencer's nostrils, invigorated by Derek’s assessment. The gears began to turn in his big brain, thinking about whether or not his colleague’s words were true. Whether or not the answer was no, he couldn’t help but feel a pang of deep-seated guilt trapped inside of him. A guilt he felt for Hotch.
He had been nothing but supportive despite his ignorance or obliviousness towards Spencer’s recovery after the Tobias Hankel case. It had been hard for him to connect with someone after Haley’s death— and if that someone was you, who was he to make his journey towards happiness even harder?
—————————————-
He knocked on the door, anxiously awaiting for his entry to be approved by the man inside. A stern ‘come in’ came from inside the office as Spencer turned the handle and entered the room filled with a strong smell of coffee.
“Reid, how can I help you?” Hotch continued to work on his files while motioning for Spencer to sit down in the chair across from him.
“I um, I just wanted to… apologize.” Hotch set down his papers and looked straight towards Reid, leaning back into his chair and crossing his arms.
“I’ve been disrespectful these past few weeks and it was uncalled for. I just, I’m sorry, Hotch.”
“Did I do something to offend you, Reid?”
Spencer lifted his eyes from his feet and widened his eyes, his arms moving in a way that paralleled his words. “No! A- Absolutely not, sir. I just um, I was in a- a mood?”
“You say that as if it’s a question,” he deadpanned, the death glare causing Spencer to shake.
“It isn’t?”
Hotch pinched the bridge of his nose while sighing. “Apology accepted, go get your work done.”
“Y- yes s- sir.”
He began to walk out, relieved that he wasn’t suspended. He believed he was in the clear until Hotch’s voice boomed through the room. A startled Spencer’s heart began to beat faster than it had before, shivering as if he was a hairless dog. “I know how you can make it up to me.”
“A- anything, sir.”
“Meet me at Sherry Park this Saturday at 8 am sharp. Don’t be late.” He began to nod his head rapidly, moving it up and down like it would be the end of the world if he didn’t.
Spencer excused himself out, and hastily sped walked to his seat to regain whatever composure he had left.
Spencer smiled to himself, taking pride in his victory. His mood was at an all-time high until he realized he still had to face whatever Hotch had in store for him on Saturday, his ego deflating before he had a chance to inflate it.
He was so so screwed.
—————————————-
Spencer walked up to Hotch from the parking lot of the park, anxiously awaiting whatever he had coming his way that day. He was confused when his phone pinged in the morning with a text message from his boss telling him to come to the park in shorts.
What the hell was he in for?
“Hotch… hi.”
“Reid.” The two of them stood in awkward silence, Spencer swaying back and forth to ease his nerves.
“U- um. Sir?” Hotch looked over to Spencer with a questioning look on his face. “W- what are we doing?”
“I’m just waiting on someone.”
Spencer’s brows furrowed at his words. “W- who?”
The question was answered for him when he heard the sound of footsteps on the grass. He turned around to see you in all your glory, stepping down the green hill with what looked like running gear on. He pushed up his glasses just to make sure that he wasn’t imagining you. He looked back to Hotch to see with a mischievous grin played on his lips.
“Hey, Hotch!” You opened your arms to give Hotch a hug as Spencer was still in a state of shock.
The two of you pulled away as Hotch motioned towards the awkward man in front of you. “Y/N, this is Dr. Spencer Reid. You two have met already if I'm correct.”
You looked at him with a smile on your face. “Yes, we have. It’s nice to see you again.” You reached your hand out to shake his. He grabbed your hand mindlessly, seemingly forgetting his fear of germs.
“Reid will be joining us from now on.”
“J- joining wh- what now?”
“We’re training for the upcoming FBI marathon. That's why we’ve been meeting up every weekend and why I asked you for directions to his office.”
“A marathon?”
“Yup!”
“Y- you mean… running?”
Hotch gave him a sly smirk. “This is how you’re gonna make it up to me, Reid.” You looked between the two of them, clearly lost without the missing pieces of the story.
Hotch cleared his throat. “Anyways. I just came to introduce the two of you, I have some paperwork to attend to.” Spencer gave him a pleading look but he only received a ‘that’s what you get’ look from his boss.
The two of you watched Hotch walk away. “So, have you done this before?”
He turned around quickly. “Sorry?”
“Have you run a marathon before?”
“U- uh, no I h- haven’t. Is um, is that a p- problem?”
“Of course not. Everyone has to start from somewhere right?” He nodded. “Alright. Well, we should get going.” You began to jog as you used your arm to motion for him to come with you. He sighed, cursing Hotch for his meddlesome actions.
The next hour was spent jogging around the park. He enjoyed the scenery and the fresh air, but he hated the actual running portion of the experience. It always seemed like he was slowing you down, stopping every once in a while to catch his breath.
But you always stopped with him.
You stood by Spencer every time he needed to take a breather or walk for a bit. It was comforting for him to know that you weren’t too bothered by his amateur athletic skills.
You suggested taking a break as you led him to a nearby bench. “So what’d you do to get him to make you run.”
He looked over at you, panting. “It’s, it’s complicated.”
You nodded understandingly, getting the notion that he might not want to share. “You know, if you really don’t want to do the marathon, I doubt he’d force you to.”
“I- I know. I just, I can’t be a pipe cleaner.”
You quirked your head to the side. “I’m not sure I understand what you mean,” you giggled.
“Oh uh, it’s really nothing.” His face was flushed red thinking about spending time with you for the next three months or so. Sure, he’d be engaging in painstaking physical activity, but it was worth it for you.
“You know, I’ve heard you’re the person I should ask for book recommendations.”
“R- really?”
“Yeah. You’re a genius, aren’t you? Haven’t you read all the books in the world?”
He laughed, “N- no, not all the books in the world. There are way too many.”
You chuckled alongside him, “I was exaggerating for effect.”
“I’m sure you were.”
You leaned over and whacked his arm jokingly. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing,” he shrugged with a smile bigger and brighter than any smile he had before.
“Are you implying that I’m stupid?”
“No, I’m implying that you’re slow.”
You laughed, “You’re one to talk. Took you a while for you to tell me where Hotch’s office was.”
The two of you were in a fit of giggles. He looked at you longingly. It was so easy to talk to you once he got used to your presence.
He piped up after a moment of silence for the both of you to stop laughing, “D- do you want to get coffee, maybe?” His voice was small and timid, afraid of rejection.
“Yeah, I think I could use a cup of the good stuff after all that running. I’m sure you could too.”
“H- hey.” You stood up first as small giggles left your lips. You extended a hand out for him to grab.
He looked up at you with peering eyes… maybe it wasn’t so hard to grow a spine.
—————————————-
Weeks went by and Spencer was happier than ever. He spent all of his free time with you. Whether it be running, which he loathed but somehow tolerated for you, coffee runs, visiting The Met in New York— everything always came easy with you.
He hated to admit it, but Derek was right. You were easier than getting a degree.
After about two weeks of Hotch excusing himself from training with you and Spencer, he finally confessed that he was running with someone else. When the two of you inquired about who it was, the once stern man blushed and looked away while crossing his arms defensively. You and Spencer had your speculations, but neither of you wanted to discourage him with your hypotheses.
Spencer was a hypocrite of sorts when he really thought about it. He was always playing matchmaker for his friends and family, but never going after what he wanted. Even after all the time he spent with you, he never found the courage to ask you out— not wanting to ruin the dynamic he already had with you. He knew his time with you would come to an inevitable end, you were only stuck with him because Hotch told him to run the marathon.
But that didn’t matter to him. What mattered was that he cherished the time he had with you before he lost you completely.
The time came for the two of you to line up at the starting line with Hotch, surprisingly, by your sides. The marathon went by fairly quickly, the training that Spencer had with you working quite effectively. The two of you finished at the same time with Hotch close behind you.
Spencer cheered, proud of himself for actually doing something that his younger self would’ve died before doing. It was fun, but he’d never do it again.
You walked up to the small table that offered water to agents who had already finished running, Spencer following closely behind you.
“We did it.”
He smiled. “Yes, we did.”
“I’m proud of you, Spence. I know you said that you never do anything that requires exercise but you almost outran me.”
“I know. I’m an incredible athlete,” he joked sarcastically.
“Okay, bring it down a notch, genius. I said that you almost outran me.”
“But I did outrun you. I stepped across the finish line 0.32 seconds before you did.”
You looked at him like you didn’t know about his weird tendency to time things already. “God, you surprise me every time, you know?”
“I know.” You sipped hour water as Spencer mimicked your actions. A solemn silence fell around you, the background noise muted from your ears.
“S- so that’s it, huh? No more marathons, no more Saturday training sessions.”
He agreed, pressing his lips into a thin line. “Y- yeah. I guess so.”
“I’ll… see you around then?”
He nodded. “Yeah. I- I’ll see you around.” He took one last look at you, one he perceived to be the last of its kind. You smiled at him one last time before walking away.
He turned around to watch you. Your time together was done and he couldn’t do anything about it.
He sighed, walking in the opposite direction and thinking about how he would continue to admire you from afar just like how it was before the two of you had become acquainted with each other. He couldn’t do anything about it, he was spineless.
His feet stopped traveling on the pavement as he stopped to remember every single thing he had learned throughout his time with you— the confidence he had gained, the courage he earned.
Spencer turned around and started calling your name, running to you like a madman. He weaved through the horde of sweaty people to find you, finally spotting you looking at him in confusion. He ran up to you and pulled you into a kiss unlike any other you had had before.
He pulled away when both of you were panting for air. “Sp- Spencer?”
“Y/N. I- I can’t just ‘see you around’. I need to be with you. I just know that if I leave you like this, I would never get you off my mind, Y/N. God. I really hate the way you make me love you.”
“Spencer. I-,” you sighed, taking a deep breath in, “I love you too.”
At that moment, he didn’t care that the two of you were smelly or sweaty or absolutely disgusting from running for hours on end. All he cared about was you.
After a while of the two of you just engaging in an obscene amount of PDA, you left to get ready for the impromptu date Spencer asked you out on. He walked you to your car and returned back to where his Morgan and Hotch were talking.
“Well look at you, Pretty Boy. You finally got yourself a girl.”
He blushed as Hotch stepped up behind him. “It wouldn’t have happened without you, Morgan.”
“Wait, what?”
“I was talking to Hotch and found out that he was only talking to Y/N because they were training together. So… I figured that Hotch could subtly set you two up and let the rest work itself out.”
“I can’t believe you guys did that.”
Morgan smiled. “Well, it wasn’t just about you.” That statement stumped both Spencer and Hotch, the two of them sharing a curious glance.
“I heard Rossi talkin’ about some woman that Hotch had been talkin’ about. A pretty lady he saw while he and Y/N were out running together. I thought that if I singled him out, he’d grow a spine and ask her out. Which he did if I may add.”
Spencer looked back at Hotch to see him just as surprised. “Did Dave tell you about Beth?”
“I may have overheard him talking about it to Garcia. And by overheard I mean she told me.” The three of them laughed together, satisfied with the overall outcome.
“I might as well give all my degrees to you for your genius plan, Derek.”
He shrugged, “What can I say? Two chickens, one stone.”
Hi, thank you again for the support, it really makes me smile. I didn’t think people cared about what I thought or wrote. As always, If you have any suggestions/requests or want me to write a specific scene then feel free to ask, my dms are open, but for now here’s part 4! This series spans across the ending of season 4 if it wasn’t already clear enough.
✰
After reviewing the file on Lee Heightower, Garcia had triangulated the call to a cell tower in Canada just over the border in Port Huron. A sure fire way to get the FBI involved, as Reid had put it. The problem was there was no way to track it, multiple border crosses had been made on the dates in question. “Trouble is, I’ve got hundreds, and as far as I can tell, if your license doesn’t ping for any prior felonies, you’re pretty much gonna pass go and collect 200 Canadian dollars,” Garcia had informed them.
By the time the meeting was over, Hotch and Morgan had asked to speak to Officer Bedwell alone. And by the time they came out of the small office, Hotch was on his way to go speak to Heightower again. From what the team could tell, they had asked to have Heightower released into the BAU custody.
➜ Authors Note: Welcome to a series rewrite of Criminal Minds! Hope you angels enjoy! <3
➜ BAU!FemaleReader x Spencer Reid x BAU
➜ SYNOPSIS: After years of hard work and determination, Y/n Landor follows the paths of her step- sister. However, her days in the BAU aren’t always filled with excitement, she finds herself drowning 6 feet under the darker side of her job. Will she rise to the surface with the help of a fellow profiler? Or will the waters finally sink into her lungs?
Warnings: Hair pulling kink! Bucketloads of sexual tension but no actual sex. Gratuitous facts about bird nests. Dorks being oblivious. Lots of fluffy heart-eyed banter. Accusations of intercourse with fictional tree-beasts.
A/N: I saw a gif that made me want to pull Spencer’s hair. That’s it. I have zero shame.
For the “friends to lovers” square on my @cmbingo card! Proofread by @fangirlxwritesx67 because she’s the best.
“You look like you fucked an Ent,” you commented cheerfully, stealing sideways glances at Spencer while you waited for the light to change.
“Thanks, that’s helpful.” He grimaced, trying to tug another burr out of a snarled curl.
“Oh my god, you’re just making it worse! I’ll help you when we get back to your place. Leave it, you goober.”
“Did you just call me a goober?” Spencer asked, trying not to laugh.
“You’re like the dictionary definition of a goober,” you said fondly.
“I have three PhDs!”
“I really wish I’d gotten a video of that tumble, Doctor Goober.”
Spencer was blushing, grinning down at his lap as he shredded a piece of leaf. It was hard not to stare at him when he smiled like that.
He’d essentially face-planted into a burr bush earlier, somewhere in the Virginia woods — he’d been so excited about explaining some wonky bit of Star Trek physics theory to you that he just forgot to pay attention to his feet — and he’d floundered out with half a hedge stuck in his hair before picking up exactly where he’d left off.
In other words, Doctor Spencer Reid was a ridiculous human being. You knew that, objectively. It didn’t stop you from having a massive crush on him.
Either he was pretending not to notice, to spare your feelings, or he was socially oblivious; you tended to believe the former, considering how well you’d seen him read other people, but you appreciated it. There was a chance you’d make it out of this — if you could just get over it already — with your friendship intact.
You cleared your throat and told him, “You look like the bastard child of Grandmother Willow and the Wizard of Oz scarecrow.”
“Even if they were real, the anatomical —”
“You didn’t mention that when I brought up the Ents. Something you want to tell me about you and Treebeard?”
Break-ups and Sapphire Dresses (Tony Bennett and Merlot Pt. 5)
Author: starlightishere
Rating: T (barely; for mentions of drunkness and vomit)
- Chapter: 5
- Story: Tony Bennett and Merlot
Summary: Reader has been hurt and is in surgery. Penelope suggests the team talk about their favourite memories of her to pass the time. It’s Penelope’s turn to share.
Main Characters: Reader, Penelope, Reid and the rest of the team
Trigger Warning:
- Story: T+
- Chapter: T (barely; for mentions of drunkness and vomit)
Summary: Bau!reader was never good at being a shoulder to cry on, so when Spencer survives the horror of Tobias Hankel’s torment, she decides to be a slap of reality.
Warning: mentions of torture
A/N: might consider writing a part 2 with developing romance if any of you are interested. Tell me!
Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3 // Part 4 // Part 5 // Part 6 // Part 7 // Part 8 // Part 9 // Part 10 // Part 11 // Part 12 // Part 13 // Part 14 // Part 15 // Part 16 // Part 17 // Part 18 // Part 19 // Part 20
Summary: Jim Halpert and Melissa Ford have been best friends since he started at Dunder Mifflin in 1999. Now that a camera crew is following the employees around so they can film a documentary, do they finally tell each other their feelings? Or do they just let them go? Either way, what will become of these two best friends?
Warnings: Cussing and Smut in later chapters.
Words: 2780
Tag List: @you-a-southpaw-doll @elskinner45 @imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl
A/N:I have NOT watched every single episode of The Office. Certain episodes will not have EVERYTHING that was done in the show and things might be wrong. Also Melissa Model Gifs are Sophia Bush…Her hair style and length will change. I look for her facial expression when I pick them. Please do not tell me this in the comments. There will be no Pam/Jim.
If you have any questions just message me. If you want to be tagged please send an ask or message me.
