Mady ౨ৎ

17 / digital diary / lesbian

[madysdiaries]

I'm actually the coolest person i've ever met and that's the only thing that matters

[dingus-dweeb]

[old6urgundy]

— SINCE U BEEN GONE!

(loser!bully!seongje x fem!reader smau)

A senior, a summer away of entering medical school and away from her dull life suddenly gets a weird text from her weird highschool bully who suddenly disappeared near the end of your senior year- not like she was looking for him...

tags . . . situationship that goes on for half of their living life, seongje is a fucking chud for revolving his life around her, they reunite, he gets jealous and mad, she gets confused about her feelings, he can't be nice to a girl he's obsessed with, reader has a nickname which is bambi because she's a orphan, always surprised and a cutiepie. (also reader's appearance doesn't limit to the moodboard. she can be whoever!!)

prologue - i - ii - iii

[madysdiaries]

Just came home from watching obsession. Staff tried to take us out of the theater 30mins before ending because we weren't 18 yet lol, we somehow didn't get kicked out and we finished watching it all

10000/10 movie omfg

[madysdiaries]

I remember when my dad was super into the stock market and shit a couple years ago, he used to tell me how that was gonna be the only way people could make money in the future and that I should be investing too and stuff. I WAS SO SCARED BRO.

Imagine a little girl SO FUCKING CONFUSED about buying actions or whatever, thinking she was gonna be broke her whole life because she didn't know how to do that.

And his saying wasn't even true; you can just go, find a job (the hardest part probably), and earn money. Nothing about the market shit he made me so scared of 😭😭

[madysdiaries]

𐙚 - take some of this, it'll calm you down

you might as well just come around... ノ 𓋜

[madysdiaries]

I love to watch her dance, seems like tragedy is all she knows

[madysdiaries]

It breaks my heart that I'd be a good mother. That I yearn to hold a little me in my arms and nurse her to sleep, to play with her, to see her take her first steps. That I love her so much already that I will not be bringing her into this world, not 'cause she doesn't deserve it, but because she deserves so much more. A better place to grow in, and maybe a better mother too.

I know I would do my very best in everything, that because I didn't had a good mother I'd knew what not to do, how to be good for her since the very beggining. But that's not enough. There's so much more when having a baby than just wanting to love something with your whole heart. And maybe I started going in the wrong direction thinking she would love me back just as much only because that's what I would do.

[madysdiaries]

When does the comfort I find in being pathetically sad and miserable stops eating me away I wonder

[madysdiaries]

I use my phone while charging it because I don't care, but lately i have to move the charger to a certain position so it'll properly charge my phone, kinda like with broken earphones iykwim. The thing is I can't find the right way anymore, so my charger isn't charging at all mmmmmmm

[madysdiaries]

What's the science behind missing someone you never met? I'm yearning for WMYB Harry Styles SO BAD. Like, I miss my baby

[madysdiaries]

I was texting my friends and one shared how she's been studying non stop six hours for her exam tomorrow, and I was like "i'm making popcorn rn". I really love that i'm not studying for uni

[girl-made-of-petals]

rip your pads loudly and fix your bras in public to assert dominance ladies

[madysdiaries]

Happy pride month, my sweet little angels!! Your trusty lesbian (me ofc) will always be here to love and support you, mwah mwah (⁠＾⁠∇⁠＾⁠)ﾉ⁠ ♡

[glowettee]

[madysdiaries]

I hope you feel better soon 💗💗💗

That's so sweet of you, thank you so much!!! (⁠｡⁠ﾉ⁠ω⁠＼⁠｡⁠) ⁠♡

I feel sl much better already, let's hope it stays that way

[madysdiaries]

I hate anorexia side effects 'cause what the hell do you mean the pain pressing in my chest making it almost completely impossible for me to lay down or breathe could be a broken rib poking my lungs