That didn’t mean you weren’t happy with how it ended.
Warnings: Cheating, Threats, Sad Boi Hour, Heatbreak, I’m not quite sure what else.
Masterlist
Previous Chapter
You couldn't remember the last time you had been this excited about anything. Aside from the occasional get together for Foggy's firm, the last time you had to dress up for a party was your wedding.
Thank god this would be different. You'd be able to have fun with your friends without the threat of Patrick and his uppity mother looming over your shoulder. No, this would be a night for you and your friends; both new and old.
After triple checking, through Bucky of course, that all of your friends were invited, all hell had broken loose.
Karen led the charge of dress shopping while Marci and Elle were in charge of accessories and makeup. Jessica had provided drinks and you kept everyone sated with snacks. The process had taken a full day and your legs ached but, you were ready. Everything was set down to the last detail and you even got Frank to agree to come.
Your mind wanders to the dress tucked into the back of your closet as you hang up yet another "Feeding day: Please do not enter." sign on the door of the reptile house. You couldn't actually lock the door (the higher ups believed that watching a snake down a live mouse would bring in more customers) but, you'd tear your hair out if another mother berated you for doing your job while their child screams bloody murder.
Thankfully most people heeded the sign which gave you a few hours of peace and quiet to worry about Laysa. It was only the second day of her reintroduction to her mother and brother and yesterday had gone damn near perfect but that didn't stop you from being a mother hen.
Your friend Whitney was head of the Big Cats department and she kept you updated in exchange for an invitation to the gala. You were going to invite her regardless but, this arrangement worked out for you too.
You double check the tape holding the sign before making your way back to your feed cart behind the scenes.
This was your domain.
When you had first decided to pursue a career in zoology, you didn’t have a clue as to what you wanted to specialize in. You sat through four hour long lectures on the anatomy of large mammals and birds nearly comatose with boredom.
Then you had your first and only class on reptiles.
At first they didn't interest you all that much either and it wasn't until you realized the lack of material on them, that you decided to dig a bit deeper.
Sure, you loved cats, dogs, and birds but there was something about how disliked reptiles were that lit a fire under your ass.
Every time you heard someone say snakes are gross or if you bring that lizard near me, I'm stepping on it - fueled that fire just a bit more.
If you had to put it into words, you'd say it was that mother hen in you acting up again. You were a firm believer that everything deserved to be loved despite their scales and venom glands.
It was then you decided to specialize in herpetology. From there you branched out to insects and everything in between: gathering all of the unloved into your proverbial arms.
The keys around your neck clink together as you walk towards your first "customers" of the day; three borderline geriatric Bearded Dragons that you call Rose, Blanche, and Dorothy.
They were each nearing fourteen years old and had been together since they were hatchlings.
"Okay ladies!" You greet after opening the back panel of the cage. "Today I've made you something special. Bok Choy and Collard Greens salad with blueberries and shredded squash paired with some gut loaded Dubia Roaches coated in our finest calcium."
You place the dishes in the enclosure with a flourish and chuckle when the three scurry over to it. While they chow down, you replace their water bowl and wipe down whatever you can quickly and efficiently before locking the cage back up and moving on.
You dance and serve your way through the next several cages all while sporting an awful French accent and giving any available lizard a few pats on their head.
You're so immersed in your work that you don't notice your phone going off in the pocket of your jeans.
Stopping in front of a much larger floor to ceiling enclosure labeled Toby, you mentally and physically brace yourself. As soon as you unlock the door, it's flung open and you nearly jump back. The huffing from the now open enclosure is nothing if not intimidating but, you simply roll your eyes and sit down with open arms.
"Come here you oaf." You laugh. As soon as the words leave your mouth a scatter of footsteps breaks the silence and you barely have time to brace yourself before a five foot Red Tegu launches himself into your lap.
The large lizard nudges his head into your open palm begging for scratches and you provide in earnest.
"How are you my handsome man?" You ask in your best baby voice. "Were you nice to Mark while I was gone? No? Good! Mama missed you so much."
The bright red blob in your lap huffs happily as you shower him with attention. Toby had been the first animal you had taken home to raise. When he was a hatchling, he developed Metabolic Bone Disease from some faulty UV lights and when the higher ups told you to put him down, you gave them a counter offer.
You'd take him home to take care of him so it wouldn't interfere with your work schedule, once he was well enough, you'd bring him back.
To your surprise they agreed and your journey had begun.
You hoist the large lizard into your arms and hold him like the baby he is, scratching his head while continuing to talk to him like you would an infant.
"Momma missed you very much. Yes she did. I was so lonely without my handsome, strong man to protect me from my dummy husband." You pout. "But, guess what? We don't have to worry about him anymore. Momma kicked him out. That's right baby, your Momma is a single woman now and she's made new friends and she's going to a gala this weekend!"
You do a quick twirl with him in your arms before stopping with a hum.
"How would you look in a tux?"
A laugh from the open enclosure startles you from your daze and you gasp when you see blue eyes through the glass.
It takes a moment for your brain to process that Bucky, Steve, and Sam were laughing at you from the other side of the enclosure but, when it did, you can feel your face heat up.
"There's a sign on the door for a reason!" You huff, nuzzling your embarrassment into Toby's chubby cheeks.
"It looked more like a recommendation Doll." Bucky smirks fondly. You avert your eyes quickly and scowl at Toby.
"Mama might have a few less friends than she made it seem." You mumble conspirioritally to the lizard before making your way to the door that leads into the public area. It's a struggle trying to open the door with Toby in your arms but you manage to do so without making an even bigger fool of yourself in front of Earth's mightiest heroes.
Bucky is by your side almost instantly and you have use all of your willpower to not match his silly grin.
"It took us a while to track you down-" Steve begins, only to be cut off by Sam.
"Correction, it took Barnes a while to track you down. It was hard trying to find someone to help when his pouty face scared everyone away." The Falcon accentuates his dig with an exaggerated pout and you can't help but bark out a laugh.
“Samuel Wilson!” You mock. “Bucky does not pout. He broods, like a man.”
The aforementioned man’s grin is soon replaced with a scowl but you don’t dwell on it as you hoist Toby into James’ arms. Despite your embarrassing greeting, the Avengers could not have come at a better time.
“Avengers to the rescue.” You chuckle as Bucky and Toby eye each other suspiciously. “He has a habit of following me around the enclosure and undoing whatever I clean. Watch him for me?”
You phrase it as a question but, you don’t give any of the men a chance to decline before you slip into the back once more. Toby’s cage is more than large enough for you to walk around in and, when you peer through the glass window, the three men walk towards it.
“For the record, cleaning would normally happen in the morning but Mark called out at the last minute so I had to prep all the feeders myself.” You explain after you start to wipe down the glass. "I see you guys finally took up my offer of using the senior discount."
Both Steve and Bucky roll their eyes at your tease while Sam's grin gets impossibly bigger.
"We needed a day to destress after all the reports we had to get through.” Steve explains as he reaches out to gently stroke Toby’s head and to your surprise, the Tegu lets him eagerly. Toby was always weary around men (something you blame entirely on Patrick’s attitude when you first brought him home) but it was clear he liked the Captain.
“And ever since we came to yours, I’ve been wondering about what the hell a Gharial is." Sam adds, following in Steve's suit and rubbing under Toby’s chin.
It's a cute picture but the way Sam and Steve cast a quick glance at each other then Bucky raises the hairs on the back of your neck; your mother hen alarm sounding off in your brain.
You and Bucky had never gotten around to talking about the mission he had been on but, it was clear it weighed heavily on the man. He looked exhausted despite the warm smile on his face.
You manage to lock eyes with Steve, while Sam distracts James, and nod to him. Relief washes over the blond's face when it's clear his message had been received: Steve and Sam didn't come here for the animals, they came because of Bucky.
You check the watch on your wrist: 10:38 in the morning. It was a bit too early for you to take lunch so you finish cleaning Toby's cage and clap your hands loudly.
"I think that should do it. How about I finish up the lizards and snakes and after lunch, I'll show you guys our bigger boys; Gharials included."
The men nod their acceptance and it brings a smile to your face. Your smile only grows as you move further down the line of cages, spouting off random facts about whatever resides inside and answering the multitude of questions Sam kept asking.
When the resident Brazilian Rainbow Boa lunges out of the cage at you, you have to hold in your laughter. While you were used to the snake's attitude it was clear the men were not as they each had varying degrees of shock showing on their faces.
The range went from rightly concerned Steve to terrified Sam to a downright panicked Bucky nearly punching out the glass to get to you. It was sweet in a weird kind of way.
After that you decide to save the venomous snakes for after the men leave lest you send the dinosaurs into cardiac arrest. A joke you make sure to vocalize.
Sam laughs out loud at the dig, startling the White-Lipped Python you affectionately named Xena into actually biting and wrapping around your arm. The impact stings but you had been bitten worse by much angrier animals, so you ignore the queasy faces of Sam and Steve as you carefully unwrap the snake from your arm, placing her hefty body back into the cage before gripping her by the back of the neck and prying her off your arm.
Bites were inevitable in your line of work as were scratches, hell the Tarantulas you took care of had a habit of flicking urticating hairs like fiberglass into your arms and eyes. This was just another day at work for you.
After you manage to get the snake to latch onto its actual food your eyes meet Bucky’s through the glass. Concern for you shone through them like a beacon and it caused your face to heat. James' eyes always seemed to hold an intensity that made your stomach flip and you were nearly a hundred percent sure he had no clue of his affect on you.
You'd like to keep it that way for as long as you could.
The alarm on your phone goes off in your pocket, startling you out of your staring contest with Bucky and reminding you that it was time to take lunch.
As if on cue, your stomach growls loudly in protest of you skipping breakfast earlier this morning.
"I'll meet you guys outside. I've just gotta put away the cart." You wave the men off then close the cage door, effectively blocking your view of them. After taking off your apron and thoroughly washing your hands you make your way outside, shielding your eyes from the bright sun. The light disorients you enough that you crash into Bucky who has to steady you. Before you can even apologize, he slips a pair of sunglasses on your face with a warm smile.
“Thanks.” You huff.
“Don’t thank me. I stole those out of Sam’s pocket.” He chuckles, nodding in the direction of Sam and Steve.
True to his word, you watch as Sam pats his pockets with a panicked look on his face causing a burst of laughter to erupt from your chest. The Falcon glances in your direction but you duck behind Bucky before he could spot his missing frames. You liked them and the chances of him getting them back was very slim now.
Maybe you’d wear them to Stark’s Halloween Gala?
As if reading your thoughts, Bucky mutters. “I think wearing those to the Gala would really ruffle the bird brain’s feathers.”
“If that’s what’s getting me attention, I’m blaming Karen for her poor outfit choice.” You jest without thinking.
“You let Karen pick your outfit?” He asks as he waves for Steve and Same to move on ahead.
“She was excited and saying no to her would have been like kicking a puppy. Karen is the human equivalent of a golden retriever.” Exasperation was evident in your tone but you refuse to go into further detail. You didn’t want to talk about yourself right now. “What are you going as?”
Bucky refuses to meet your eyes as he mumbles something under his breath.
“What was that?”
The man huffs before crossing his arms across his chest. “I said Tony has something planned for us.”
“And you’re making fun of me? He still calls you Elsa. You’re going to end up in what will be the most accurate Frozen costume the world has ever seen.” You didn’t even attempt to hide your amusement as his eyes widened in realization. “It’s too late to turn back now, Bucky. I hope you can learn all the words to Let it Go before Saturday; I’m expecting a full performance.”
You watch as all color drains from his handsome face before laying a reassuring hand on his arm. “I’m kidding. If you’re that worried about it, why’d you let Tony pick out your costume?”
He stands there for a few moments with an open mouth before finally finding his words. “I didn’t have time to pick out my own with the mission and the divorce.”
His honesty can’t help but put a slight damper on your mood. Your heart didn’t ache at the memory of your marriage with Patrick anymore but, you still felt a slight sting whenever it was brought up and you wonder if Bucky feels the same. You almost want to ask but, you figure that there was a better time and place for such a raw conversation.
“That mission really took a lot out of you huh.” You begin casually. “All three of you look like you haven slept in months.”
“It feels like it. The jet lag doesn’t help either.” The way he avoids eye contact has your metaphorical feathers ruffling so you take his arm in yours. The contact sends an odd feeling down your spine but you brush it off in favor of pulling him towards the nearest food stand. You were surprised it was open this late in the season.
“Where did you have to jet off to? If it was somewhere tropical I’m going to be slightly jealous. I’m wearing two pairs of pants to keep warm right now.” You pout for a moment before noticing the attendant’s wide eyes staring at the man beside you. You level a glare at the worker as a warning before looking at the menu.
“We were in Italy, then Germany, then Madripoor. We’re all tired.”
Worry creases your face as he lists the places he had been. You had heard about Madripoor a while back. It was a dangerous and lawless place- even Elektra avoided it.
“What the hell had you jumping from place to place like that? Must’ve been important if it ended up leading the Avengers on a wild goose chase.” You inquire after ordering two pretzel dogs.
James takes the food from the worker while blatantly ignoring their trembling hand. You bite back a scoff and make a mental note to talk to HR about holding some kind of sensitivity training for the staff. No one likes being ogled at; especially not Bucky.
Buck stays quiet until you are both out of earshot of any random passerby before stopping. The suddenness of it jerks you to a halt and almost sends your hotdog flying. You had nearly forgotten you were still linked by the arm.
The mountain that was James seems to curl in on himself, making him appear to be smaller than he really was and suddenly you weren’t hungry anymore.
“James…”
“There was rumors of a terrorist group hiding out in the rural mountains of Italy. We had spotty information on them at best so Stark had us all split into groups. The forest was so dense that our comm’s went out and we couldn’t get a hold of FRIDAY or the rest of the team.”
You tried to imagine it. Searching for an enemy that might not even exist. The anticipation.The foreboding.
“Sam and Wanda went above the tree line to try to get a status report from the others while I stayed below.” He continues walking, ignorant to your own inner musings. “I couldn’t understand why, but the area felt familiar to me. Like I had been there before.”
A sinking feeling settles itself into your stomach. Making you toss your unwanted food into a nearby trash can. He couldn’t mean…
“You don’t have to tell me.” You reassure. “Not if you don’t want to.”
He shakes his head before finally making eye contact with you. "I was ambushed. One of them took out my arm with an EMP device. I remember being hit over the head with something metal and then, nothing.”
There was this feeling you’d get whenever Patrick had been hurt on the job. This helplessness that had your heart pounding and tears welling in your eyes. You could clearly remember how your hands would shake and there was nothing you could do to stop them.
Listening to Bucky’s plight felt ten times worse.
You had to take a deep breath to quell the nausea rising in your gut but, James kept going, ignorant to your reaction.
“When I came to, I was in a bunker tied to a chair. I couldn’t see anything, but I could hear them clearly. They were saying the words.”
Spotting a bench nearby, you drag Bucky towards it and sit. One of the zoo’s roaming peacocks strolls close and nearly plucks the hotdog out of his hand, jerking a laugh from the man and slightly easing the tension.
“You mean the words?” You don’t know why you ask. Of course it was the words but, those words should have been lost to the years. Bucky had been free of them for a while now and it was something he was extremely proud of. “They don’t work anymore.”
“They didn’t know that.”
You almost want to smirk or say something about how much of a shock it must have been for them to realize their grand plan failed but, you hold your tongue. This wasn't a joking matter.
“They aren’t even supposed to know those words exist. I burned that book a long time ago and thought we wiped the remnants of HYDRA from the modern era.”
“Just because they knew the words doesn’t mean they’re HYDRA, right?”
You try to sound reassuring but, instead you feel naive. Like a kid finding out the boogeyman wasn’t real only to realize that humans are much worse than any monster your mind could conjure.
“I couldn’t take that chance, Doll. None of us could but, we couldn’t get anything solid out of them.” The briefest smile glasses across his face. “Wanda was furious. They were scared when I woke up as Bucky and not the Soldier but when Wanda and Sam showed up, one of them actually fainted before we could even start the actual fight.”
You silently thank Wanda Maximoff and Sam Wilson for looking out for James when you can’t.
“The most we could get was that they were at a black market auction in Germany and some shady guy just gave them the book.”
“And from Germany, you got a lead to Madripoor?” You guess.
“And from Madripoor… nothing. No more leads or sightings of the book. Tony and Steve called it when the trail went cold. I don’t think Nat agreed but, it was two against one.”
“Now I feel bad for freaking about not knowing what I’m wearing to the gala.” You sigh before cautiously resting your head on his shoulder. “I can’t imagine how you, Wanda, and Nat must feel. No one deserves to have their past dredged up like that.”
For a moment you worry that he would be uncomfortable with the affectionate gesture but instead he shocks you by resting his head against yours.
A warm feeling erupts in your chest and you can’t help but smile.
“Laysa’s been officially introduced to her mom and brother. D’ya wanna see her?” You question as you slip from his grip into a standing position. From this angle, with the sunlight shining on his face, Bucky looked every bit like the Greek god Karen had aliked him to and you can feel your face heat.
His baby blues stare back at you for a moment before he nods.
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Drabbles // Challenges // Headcanons // One Shots // Series
I want to live by myself when I move out of my parent's place but I'm really afraid of money problems? I'm afraid that the only place I can afford will be in the ghetto and it'll all be torn apart and I'll only be allowed to eat one granola bar a week. I'm really stressing out about this. I don't know anything about after school life. I don't know anything about paying bills or how to buy an apartment and it's really scaring me. is there anything you know that can help me?
HI darling,
I’ve actually got a super wonderful masterpost for you to check out:
Home
what the hell is a mortgage?
first apartment essentials checklist
how to care for cacti and succulents
the care and keeping of plants
Getting an apartment
Money
earn rewards by taking polls
how to coupon
what to do when you can’t pay your bills
see if you’re paying too much for your cell phone bill
how to save money
How to Balance a Check Book
How to do Your Own Taxes
Health
how to take care of yourself when you’re sick
things to bring to a doctor’s appointment
how to get free therapy
what to expect from your first gynecologist appointment
how to make a doctor’s appointment
how to pick a health insurance plan
how to avoid a hangover
a list of stress relievers
how to remove a splinter
Emergency
what to do if you get pulled over by a cop
a list of hotlines in a crisis
things to keep in your car in case of an emergency
how to do the heimlich maneuver
Job
time management
create a resume
find the right career
how to pick a major
how to avoid a hangover
how to interview for a job
how to stop procrastinating
How to write cover letters
Travel
ULTIMATE PACKING LIST
Traveling for Cheap
Travel Accessories
The Best Way to Pack a Suitcase
How To Read A Map
How to Apply For A Passport
How to Make A Travel Budget
Better You
read the news
leave your childhood traumas behind
how to quit smoking
how to knit
how to stop biting your nails
how to stop procrastinating
how to stop skipping breakfast
how to stop micromanaging
how to stop avoiding asking for help
how to stop swearing constantly
how to stop being a pushover
learn another language
how to improve your self-esteem
how to sew
learn how to embroider
how to love yourself
100 tips for life
Apartments/Houses/Moving
Moving Out and Getting an Apartment, Part 1: Are You Sure? (The Responsible One)
Moving Out and Getting an Apartment, Part 2: Finding the Damn Apartment (The Responsible One)
Moving Out and Getting an Apartment, Part 3: Questions to Ask about the Damn Apartment (The Responsible One)
Moving Out and Getting an Apartment, Part 4: Packing and Moving All of Your Shit (The Responsible One)
How to Protect Your Home Against Break-Ins (The Responsible One)
Education
How to Find a Fucking College (The Sudden Adult)
How to Find Some Fucking Money for College (The Sudden Adult)
What to Do When You Can’t Afford Your #1 Post-Secondary School (The Sudden Adult)
Stop Shitting on Community College Kids (Why Community College is Fucking Awesome) (The Responsible One)
How to Ask for a Recommendation Letter (The Responsible One)
How to Choose a College Major (The Sudden Adult)
Finances
How to Write a Goddamn Check (The Responsible One)
How to Convince Credit Companies You’re Not a Worthless Bag of Shit (The Responsible One)
Debit vs Credit (The Responsible One)
What to Do if Your Wallet is Stolen/Lost (The Sudden Adult)
Budgeting 101 (The Responsible One)
Important Tax Links to Know (The Responsible One)
How to Choose a Bank Without Screwing Yourself (The Responsible One)
Job Hunting
How to Write a Resume Like a Boss (The Responsible One)
How to Write a Cover Letter Someone Will Actually Read (The Responsible One)
How to Handle a Phone Interview without Fucking Up (The Responsible One)
10 Sites to Start Your Job Search (The Responsible One)
Life Skills
Staying in Touch with Friends/Family (The Sudden Adult)
Bar Etiquette (The Sudden Adult)
What to Do After a Car Accident (The Sudden Adult)
Grow Up and Buy Your Own Groceries (The Responsible One)
How to Survive Plane Trips (The Sudden Adult)
How to Make a List of Goals (The Responsible One)
How to Stop Whining and Make a Damn Appointment (The Responsible One)
Miscellaneous
What to Expect from the Hell that is Jury Duty (The Responsible One)
Relationships
Marriage: What the Fuck Does It Mean and How the Hell Do I Know When I’m Ready? (Guest post - The Northwest Adult)
How Fucked Are You for Moving In with Your Significant Other: An Interview with an Actual Real-Life Couple Living Together™ (mintypineapple and catastrofries)
Travel & Vehicles
How to Winterize Your Piece of Shit Vehicle (The Responsible One)
How to Make Public Transportation Your Bitch (The Responsible One)
Other Blog Features
Apps for Asshats
Harsh Truths & Bitter Reminders
Asks I’ll Probably Need to Refer People to Later
Apartments (or Life Skills) - How Not to Live in Filth (The Sudden Adult)
Finances - Tax Basics (The Responsible One)
Important Documents - How to Get a Copy of Your Birth Certificate (The Responsible One)
Important Documents - How to Get a Replacement ID (The Responsible One)
Health - How to Deal with a Chemical Burn (The Responsible One)
Job Hunting - List of Jobs Based on Social Interaction Levels (The Sudden Adult)
Job Hunting - How to Avoid Falling into a Pit of Despair While Job Hunting (The Responsible One)
Job Hunting - Questions to Ask in an Interview (The Responsible One)
Life Skills - First-Time Flying Tips (The Sudden Adult)
Life Skills - How to Ask a Good Question (The Responsible One)
Life Skills - Reasons to Take a Foreign Language (The Responsible One)
Life Skills - Opening a Bar Tab (The Sudden Adult)
Relationships - Long Distance Relationships: How to Stay in Contact (The Responsible One)
Adult Cheat Sheet:
what to do if your pet gets lost
removing stains from your carpet
how to know if you’re eligible for food stamps
throwing a dinner party
i’m pregnant, now what?
first aid tools to keep in your house
how to keep a clean kitchen
learning how to become independent from your parents
job interview tips
opening your first bank account
what to do if you lose your wallet
tips for cheap furniture
easy ways to cut your spending
selecting the right tires for your car
taking out your first loan
picking out the right credit card
how to get out of parking tickets
how to fix a leaky faucet
get all of your news in one place
getting rid of mice & rats in your house
when to go to the e.r.
buying your first home
how to buy your first stocks
guide to brewing coffee
first apartment essentials checklist
coping with a job you hate
30 books to read before you’re 30
what’s the deal with retirement?
difference between insurances
Once you’ve looked over all those cool links, I have some general advice for you on how you can have some sort of support system going for you:
Reasons to move out of home
You may decide to leave home for many different reasons, including:
wishing to live independently
location difficulties – for example, the need to move closer to university
conflict with your parents
being asked to leave by your parents.
Issues to consider when moving out of home
It’s common to be a little unsure when you make a decision like leaving home. You may choose to move, but find that you face problems you didn’t anticipate, such as:
Unreadiness – you may find you are not quite ready to handle all the responsibilities.
Money worries – bills including rent, utilities like gas and electricity and the cost of groceries may catch you by surprise, especially if you are used to your parents providing for everything. Debt may become an issue.
Flatmate problems – issues such as paying bills on time, sharing housework equally, friends who never pay board, but stay anyway, and lifestyle incompatibilities (such as a non-drug-user flatting with a drug user) may result in hostilities and arguments.
Your parents may be worried
Think about how your parents may be feeling and talk with them if they are worried about you. Most parents want their children to be happy and independent, but they might be concerned about a lot of different things. For example:
They may worry that you are not ready.
They may be sad because they will miss you.
They may think you shouldn’t leave home until you are married or have bought a house.
They may be concerned about the people you have chosen to live with.
Reassure your parents that you will keep in touch and visit regularly. Try to leave on a positive note. Hopefully, they are happy about your plans and support your decision.
Tips for a successful move
Tips include:
Don’t make a rash decision – consider the situation carefully. Are you ready to live independently? Do you make enough money to support yourself? Are you moving out for the right reasons?
Draw up a realistic budget – don’t forget to include ‘hidden’ expenses such as the property’s security deposit or bond (usually four weeks’ rent), connection fees for utilities, and home and contents insurance.
Communicate – avoid misunderstandings, hostilities and arguments by talking openly and respectfully about your concerns with flatmates and parents. Make sure you’re open to their point of view too – getting along is a two-way street.
Keep in touch – talk to your parents about regular home visits: for example, having Sunday night dinner together every week.
Work out acceptable behaviour – if your parents don’t like your flatmate(s), find out why. It is usually the behaviour rather than the person that causes offence (for example, swearing or smoking). Out of respect for your parents, ask your flatmate(s) to be on their best behaviour when your parents visit and do the same for them.
Ask for help – if things are becoming difficult, don’t be too proud to ask your parents for help. They have a lot of life experience.
If your family home does not provide support
Not everyone who leaves home can return home or ask their parents for help in times of trouble. If you have been thrown out of home or left home to escape abuse or conflict, you may be too young or unprepared to cope.
If you are a fostered child, you will have to leave the state-care system when you turn 18, but you may not be ready to make the sudden transition to independence.
If you need support, help is available from a range of community and government organisations. Assistance includes emergency accommodation and food vouchers. If you can’t call your parents or foster parents, call one of the associations below for information, advice and assistance.
Where to get help
Your doctor
Kids Helpline Tel. 1800 55 1800
Lifeline Tel. 13 11 44
Home Ground Services Tel. 1800 048 325
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Summary:
You'd heard rumours of him. Terrible stories of horror and brutality, of merciless bloodshed. The Winter Knight was a demon in every way imaginable, and you expect your arranged marriage to him to be no different. However, the truth is far more complicated, and the man you anticipate fearing the most may just be your only solace.
Warnings: Major warnings for a scene with dubious consent, smut, talk of depression, attempted suicide, and attempted assault.
Note: This story was previously posted on another platform!
Okay this summary is BAD and I’m gonna change it at some point, but basically this is an arranged marriage au, a medieval fantasy au, and a fantasy take on Bucky as the winter soldier au!!!!! 🤪💖
Peter: *puts honey in his tea* Oh yeah, get in that leaf juice you sexy, sexy bee sauce.
MJ: ...hey do you take constructive criticism?
Peter: I absolutely fucking do not.
The Night Wolves. New York’s most prolific and secretive gang. Always watching yet somehow always out of reach. Always slipping through the Avengers grasp.
Until they got you.
You were a street rat. A grunt working for the most gruesome group of criminals New York had ever seen.
Captain America wasn’t expecting much when they brought you in, he certainly wasn’t expecting you and his best friend to get along so well. You were a courier, nothing more.
Or so they thought.
Warnings: Violence, Cursing, Talks of Murder, Actual Murder, Talks of Abuse, Kidnapping, Depictions of Abuse, Crude Humor, Sexual Humor, Bucky Barnes (because he needs a warning all in himself), Sad Boi Hours.
You groan against the rays of sunlight the next morning, regretting that you let Wanda keep you up as late as she had.
Mountains of snacks and Sam Wilson being scared out of his shorts wasn’t what you had been expecting from movie night, but you weren’t disappointed in the least. For some reason you thought the Avengers would be the no talking and veggie trays type of movie watchers. Thankfully that wasn’t the case and you were able to eat your body weight in caramel corn once you got it out of Bucky’s grasp. The man had a serious sweet tooth and that somehow added to his disgustingly perfect charm in your eyes.
You had half a mind to think that it was nothing more than an elaborate ploy to gain your trust. Had being the operative word. After watching the man spill and entire milkshake on his lap when you accidentally brushed up against him on the couch you decided that the man couldn’t put up a front for the life of him.
Even if you ended up being wrong, you were impressed.
When you finally open your eyes, your mind wanders to Flora and Maeve. More than a week had passed since you last saw them. No matter how humble and welcoming the Scarlet Witch was, she wasn’t your sister like those two were.
You once again find yourself regretting this plan. There had to be another way. It didn’t even have to be a better way. Just any way other than this.
The clock on your phone reads seven in the morning and you groan again. Normally by this time you were sitting in your office, planning another hit with your choice of coffee in hand. Gracie would be winding through your legs and the girls would be hounding you to take better care of yourself. You banish the memory with a shake of your head. Daydreaming wouldn’t solve your problems. You were stuck here until the end of the month. Only twenty-six more days to go but, who’s counting.
Not you, that’s for sure.
There’s a familiar knock at your door and you debate between pretending to be asleep of answering it.
The choice is made for you when Bucky’s baritone voice calls out. “Hey, uh, Wanda wanted me to ask you to meet her in the common room.”
You decide to feign sleep.
“She also left you some clothes.” He adds.
The sound that passes through your lips is somewhere between a moan and a growl. Were all the Avengers morning people? You didn’t think you could handle that.
You definitely couldn’t handle Rogers’ holier than thou aura before noon.
Rolling out of bed, you stretch your arms above your head and open the door mid-yawn. You throw in a pout for good measure when you meet Bucky’s baby blues. To your satisfaction, a blush rises on the man’s face. Serves him right for waking you so early after a late night.
“Thanks Bucky.” Hopefully he doesn’t realize the sincerity in your voice is forced when, in an odd sense of déjà vu, you take the bundle of clothes from his hands. “I’ll give you your shirt back after I wash it.”
He mumbles something along the lines of take your time before flashing you a shy smile and making his way back towards his room. After his blunder last night, he’d begun to relax around you more. He laughed a bit harder when Sam cracked jokes and relaxed into the couch next to you after changing where as he had been stiff as a board when everyone first took their seats.
Honestly, if you though his voice was velvet; his laugh was in knee-buckling league of its own.
Barnes was a complete package and you think it a shame that you were natural enemies. The both of you could have done great things together.
Your phone goes off on your nightstand, breaking you out of the great things you were imagining, and you dash for it.
It’s a call from Liza, Flora’s cover contact, and you could just scream in glee. This was her first attempt at contact and like hell you were going to miss it.
“Hello?” You answer in a sing-song.
“Hey girlie. I haven’t seen you at the shop in a while! Are you okay? How are things?” Her familiar voice warms your heart. There wasn’t a doubt in your mind that this call was being recorded so you had to choose your next words carefully.
“Sorry to worry you. I’ve had a really hectic week, so much has happened. I had to leave the city for a while because of dad but, I’m safe I promise you. I’ve met some really nice people that are letting me stay with them. They’re looking out for me while we get dad back on his feet.” Holding the phone between your ear and shoulder, you begin to slide out of your clothes and pull on the clean ones.
“Really? That’s nice of them. What are they like?” There was an edge to Flora’s voice that only you would notice. She was worried for obvious reasons.
“Well the first few days were rough because it was all guys and they’re clueless on how to deal with women.”
You hope Flora could read between the lines. The men are clueless and suspect nothing. Let alone that I’m the Alpha. Sexism at its finest.
“Oh geez.” You snort at her exclamation. “But, you said the first few days. I’m assuming there’s another girl there now?”
You nod even though she can’t see you. “Mhm. She really nice and really helpful. I’m surprised the men can function without her. She wears the pants around here. I’m actually going to meet with her now.”
Translation: She’s the brains and powerful to boot. We should be weary of her.
“As she should.” Flora proclaims haughtily. “You be careful okay? And let me know when you’ll be back! We miss you.”
Your hand pauses while slipping on a sock. “I miss you guys too. Hopefully we can get dad better and come home soon. This place isn’t home.”
“Home is where the heart is Val. Toodles!”
After the call disconnects, you stare at your phone in shock. You never, in the time you’ve known Flora, thought you would hear the woman say toodles. You never thought you’d hear anyone use the word. This whole plan was bringing out the crazy in all of you.
You make for your door, shoes in hand, ready to face the Witch. Flora’s call had lifted a weight from your shoulders and you’re able to walk down the hall with a pep in your step. Things were going to plan and nothing put you in a better mood, even if it was a plan you despised with every fiber of your being. You even managed a cheery hello to the Star Spangled Ken Doll when you pass him.
He reciprocates with wide eyes that follow you down the hall.
Wanda is waiting for you on the couch; sat next to her is a face you had only known through magazines.
“Hey Valerie!” The witch greets with a smile. “This is Pepper Potts-Stark.”
You knew who she was; of course you did. The woman was a legend. Starting as Tony Stark’s assistant she eventually married the billionaire and proceeded to take over his company when he passed. Since she gained control, Stark Industries had skyrocketed to numbers even its founder couldn’t reach. The woman was the best businesswoman in the world and a mother on top of that.
“It’s nice to meet you.” The woman grins, extending a hand for you to shake, which you do with wide eyes.
“Me?” You guffaw. This woman was your goddam hero Valerie Mason or not. “It’s nic-amazing to meet you. Mrs. Pot-“
“Please, call me Pepper.”
“Pepper.” You rectify giddily. “Its very nice to meet you too.”
“Wanda told me the boys brought you in here without any clothes or other necessities. I give you full permission to smack the hell out of them. I swear, the three of them would lose their heads if they weren’t attached to their bodies. I’m pretty sure FRIDAY has to remind them to wash their hair.” The redhead whispers conspiratorially with a roll of her eyes and you could swoon on the spot.
“So, since Steve has refused to let us take you back to your apartment, we’re going to be taking you shopping.” Wanda continues as the duo stands. You could cry tears of joy. Shopping with the Pepper Potts.
And Scarlet Witch, of course but, Pepper Potts.
But, you weren’t you. You were Valerie Mason and she would say- “I can’t let you do that. I can deal with what I have. You’ve already done so much.”
“You won’t talk her out of it.” Pepper laughs. “We’re taking you out. End of discussion.”
“But Captain Rogers-“
“Is staying in a building I own. If he doesn’t like it he can leave.” The billionaire shrugs and you weigh the pros and cons of proposing to her right there.
“Besides. We need dresses for the upcoming gala. You included.” Wanda affirms while looping her arm through yours. “And you need something other than Bucky’s shirt to wear around.”
It’s Pepper’s turn to look at you with wide eyes. You guessed it wasn’t every day Barnes gave his clothing to strange women. The knowledge filled you with a twisted sense of pride but, you duck your head to avoid the woman’s gaze.
You wait until you’re out of the building to lift your head. The fresh air felt amazing to breathe in. The morning sun left you feeling energized and warm.
The car that pulls up in front of you is the same model you have stored in your garage and it sends a pang of longing through your heart. You missed your car.
And your cat.
And your bed.
And your pool.
And-
“Are you ready?” Pepper asks, opening a door for you. All thoughts of the things you missed fly from your head (aside from Gracie that is) as you squeeze into the luxury vehicle.
“As I’ll ever be.”
Maybe this month wouldn’t be awful after all.
By the time you return to the compound, your feet are aching and your arms feel as though they’re about to fall off due to the weight of your bags.
You’re so absorbed in your wallowing that you almost walk past the giant green thing in the kitchen.
Almost.
Wanda had warned you that Banner was coming home today but, you had forgotten somewhere between SoHo and Manhattan. His back was turned to you so, you take the time to observe him. The man was huge. The videos of him scaling buildings and taking down aliens didn’t do him justice. According to the Witch he had mellowed out completely but, that did little to calm your nerves.
You relax when you hear the signature clinking of a spoon being stirred in a mug. The Hulk was making tea if your sense of smell was on point.
You debate not introducing yourself and just making a break for you room before deciding against it. You’d rather meet him one on one rather than in a room filled with watchful eyes.
“Um… Hi.” You start, starling the man. “You must be Bruce Banner.”
The green giant turns towards you slowly and you’re taken aback by how kind his eyes look behind his small glasses. He holds a teacup between his thumb a pointer finger, which he’s careful not to spill.
Banner nods, extending his unoccupied hand before thinking better of it and retracting the gesture. “You must be Valerie Mason.” His eyes travel to the copious bags in your hands and he grins shyly. “Pep and Wanda got to you I see.”
“Apparently I’m going to a gala and I needed a dress.”
Banner’s eyes turn solemn at your words and you fear you may have said something wrong. The last thing you needed was for the Hulk to lose his cool and throw you out a window.
“Is it that time of year already?” He mutters; more to himself than you. He must see the question in your eyes because he clears his throat. “It’s the gala celebrating Thanos’ defeat and to remember those we lost. Tony, Vision-“
“And Natasha.” You finish. You had heard rumors of the romance between the Hulk and Black Widow but, you’d always chalked it up to a reporter’s overactive imagination. The pain on his face tells you that those weren’t just rumors. “I’m sorry. It must be hard.”
“Yeah well, it doesn’t get easier.” The teacup shudders between his fingers and, for a moment, you fear that it would shatter in his grip.
It doesn’t and the giant man lets out a sigh. “I should probably get back to the lab. You should stop by if you’re interested in… well anything really. We’ve got it all.”
You’d have to take him up on that offer. Sure, the Hulk’s size was intimidating but, you were never one to back down from a challenge and the opportunity to sift through one of Stark’s labs wasn’t one you’d miss.
“Thank you. I’d like that.” Banner gives you a tired smile before lumbering off and you almost pity him before you check yourself. You had a very limited amount of fucks to give on a given day and you weren’t going to waste a single one of them on the Avengers.
From the hall he disappeared down, you hear something shatter and a quiet shit.
…Okay, maybe you could spare one. Plus, strategically, getting the resident genius on your side could only help your position.
With an idea taking root in your brain, you rush towards your room, hitting the breaks before you crash into one Steve Rogers who doesn’t look like he’s moved since this morning.
“Sorry Captain Rogers. Didn’t see you there.” You stutter, turning on the awkward charm that, according to Pepper, Valerie Mason had in loads.
It doesn’t work. Blue eyes lock onto the bags in your hands and a frown mars the blond’s face.
In a split second decision, you shift your bags so that the several Victoria’s Secret logos are revealed and whatever the man was about to say dies in his throat. A blush crawls up Rogers’ neck as he mumbles incoherently before rushing off, leaving you in a state of victorious satisfaction.
He’s gone so quickly, its almost funny and you’re free to go to your room without persecution.
Not that Wanda would let the Captain berate you. You had a feeling the Witch was going to be one of your best assets in this situation. You felt for the woman. She had lost her parents, brother, and the love of her life and you almost feel guilty for using her need for attachments to your advantage.
You manage to open and close your door with your foot before promptly collapsing on the floor. Shopping with the richest woman in the world and the most powerful woman in the world was no joke. You were half-surprised you survived.
“Hey FRIDAY?” You call out from your place on the floor.
“Yes Miss Mason?” The AI replies cheerfully. You weren’t used to a cheerful AI. MARVI had an attitude you couldn’t seem to program out of him.
“Can you get me the numbers of a couple pottery studios willing to do custom pieces?”
There’s a beat of silence before she speaks again. “May I ask what the custom piece is?”
“A mug.” You sigh. “A really big mug.”
“I will get right on that Miss Mason.”
Your room goes silent once more and you revel in it. You had always preferred the quiet of an empty room to the non-stop chatter of a party. It was the main reason you had gotten a home far from the city. Wildflowers and green fields as far as the eye can see had always attracted you more than sky high buildings and the constant bustle of everyone thinking their lives are more important than common fucking courtesy.
You had lost count of how many people you wanted to throttle for bumping into you on the sidewalk.
No matter how much you wished to stay in your place on the floor, you had a feeling Pepper wouldn’t forgive you if you let the dress she bought wrinkle because you were too lazy to hang it up. It would be a shame; the dress was beautiful even if you didn’t want to go to the gala it was for.
You had a feeling that emotions would be running high during the memorial and emotions weren’t really your forte. You feared that your lack of understanding would completely blow your cover. For as long as you could remember you worked liked a robot from one job to another. There was a certain amount of feeling in your line of work but, nothing like what the Avengers had faced.
Now, now. Enough of that.
You pull yourself off of the floor with a huff and remove the dress from its bag before unfolding it. You’d have to get it tailored because the store only had it in a size larger than yours but, you couldn’t pass the gown up. Wanda had pulled the black dress with gold detailing with such glee that saying no would have been akin to kicking a puppy and you were above animal abuse.
After hanging the dress up, you move on to the other bags, folding and putting away their contents until all that’s left are the same bags you used to scare the Captain away.
He was pathetic. One of Earth’s mightiest heroes running away from a striped bag. Maeve would get a kick out of that.
Wanda would too. You’d have to tell her tonight at dinner and you were quite looking forward to it for the first time since being brought here.
After dinner, you’d have to go up to the roof as well. Pepper had mentioned that it used to be her favorite place in the compound at night. That she could see the stars for miles and, more importantly, it was deserted and there were no cameras.
Staying in the confines of your room would drive you mad if you let it so, when the woman told her about the little escape, you made it a goal of yours to spend a bit of time out there every night.
In blissful loneliness.
After dinner (complete with Wanda teasing the Captain about the bag incident) and after you’re sure everyone else has gone to bed you slip on a new set of sleeping clothes before making your way to the kitchen.
It looked eerie with only one light illuminating the area but, you make do. After searching the cabinets, you finally find where the mugs were stored then, you start the process of boiling water. It was chilly tonight and you’d be damned if you went to sit on the roof with nothing to fight off the cold.
As you wait for the water to heat, your mind wanders to dinner once more. It was the second time you had eaten with the Avengers but, the first time you had been so nervous that you hadn’t really taken anything in. Now that you had time to study the group, you had noticed a few oddities.
But, at the top of your list was the way the Winter Soldier refused to look his Captain in the eye; or even look at him in general. Your first assumption was that, much to your dismay, the Captain was more Bucky’s type than you were but, then you saw it.
It was brief – only a flicker in Bucky’s blue eyes but, it was one of the only emotions you understood completely.
Anger.
Anger mixed with something you could only describe as betrayal. Something Rogers did hurt his best friend beyond repair and you wanted to know what. You don’t even attempt to integrate it into your mission. You just wanted to sate your own curiosity and another, dare you say protective, part of you needs to know why anyone would hurt the human embodiment of a cinnamon roll.
Barnes was so sweet you could eat him up.
The whistling of the kettle brings you back to reality and you quickly pull it off of the stove before the noise wakes any of the other residents.
The drawer next to you opens on its own accord, nearly giving you a heart attack before you see the boxes of tea sat inside.
“Thanks FRIDAY.” You grin with a low voice as you search through the boxes. Next to a tiny jar of honey is a container of lavender and you take it as a sign. While the tea steeps you pour in a healthy dollop of honey before making your way to the elevator.
The warmth of the mug seeps into your bones and one sip of it brings a bright smile to your face and you climb the floors. You’d have to ask FRIDAY about ordering a book for you to read during your nights on the roof.
The elevator doors open with a quiet ding and your smile grows as you step out of the box and follow the signs down the dimly lit hallway. You were only a few steps away from the beginnings of a new and solitary tradition of yours: dream of your future plans of calling Maeve and Flora without watchful eyes on you as you push the door open.
The dream is quickly shattered when you spot another lone figure standing at the railing and a hiss of disappointment leaves your throat before you can stop it.
The figure was definitively male and white which really rained on your parade since the only two white guys in the tower were super soldiers with super hearing and that meant he heard you open the door.
You curse your excellent deductive reasoning as the figure turns, moonlight shining off of a metal appendage.
“Oh, it’s just you.” Once again, your mouth works faster than your brain but, the same can’t be said for the man staring at you with an open mouth. “Sorry to interrupt. I’ll just go.”
You go to turn on your heel but, Bucky’s gruff voice stops you in your tracks. “No wait. I’ll go. You can-“
He was back at it with the puppy eyes and overly sweet demeanor. The way he shyly shuffles his feet and stumbles over his words were quickly becoming your kryptonite.
You find yourself shaking your head in refusal. “You were here first.”
Blue eyes lock with yours and you let out a nervous laugh befitting of your cover. Something about this man never failed to catch you off guard and, as someone who craved control, you hated it.
“Or.” He mumbles after a moment. “We could both stay. If you want.”
You didn’t want. You wanted to sit on top of the building alone and be yourself. You wanted to drop this innocent girl act and scowl to your heart’s desire. You wanted to flip off the moon and curse at the stars.
You wanted to be you and you couldn’t do that with Barnes watching you from two feet away.
You almost decline before you think better of it. It was late and no doubt the man was tired. You had learned a long time ago that people were willing to admit things in the dark that they would never voice out loud with the sun’s ray warming their body. People don’t feel judged by the moon’s gentle gaze.
This would be your first step in the direction of getting to know what the Avengers know and then some.
You knew your answer but, you didn’t like it one bit. “I’d like that.”
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