Mauerbauertraurigkeit

[magaoidh]

When people say things to me like: "Your mother would be so upset you cut down that cedar tree", or: "she'd be so proud of all the renovations you've done to the house", my jaw turns to iron, clinched so tightly I might shatter my teeth. Sentences like that might mean something to someone whose mother died in a tragic car accident or after a long battle with cancer, but when your mother chose to leave you; when she took her own life...there's no comfort in her pride, no guilt in her disappointment. There is only anger. Anger because if she cared about the damn cedar tree she would still be here. If she wanted the house renovated, she would have stuck around and done it herself. But she didn't. Wherever she is, she doesn't give a shit about the fucking tree, and she certainly doesn't care that I busted my ass ripping down all her God awful paisley wallpaper that would make selling this money pit impossible. She didn't think of any of those things before she did what she did. She thought only of herself. Yes, I know she was in pain. Yes, I know she thought it was her only answer, but understanding why she did it doesn't change the fact that what she did tossed a tiny snowball down the side of a mountain, growing with every inch it traveled, until it became an avalanche which crashed through my life, leaving behind it a trail of destruction I don't know if I can ever fix. So no, I don't care if she's upset because I cut down the cedar tree, and I don't care what she thinks of the renovations, because if any of that shit really mattered she'd still be here.

[psychedelevangelist]

Cardinal Rules For Life

[magaoidh]

You think you're over it. Some people say that it stays with you every day of your life, scaring you deep, but I didn't find that to be true. I rarely even thought about it, and when I did, it was more a passing thought or a mention to someone in conversation...a place marker in time to reference when other things were happening. And then one night you dream about it, only it's a hundred times worse. This time you don't get away. This time you're trapped and hurt over and over again, in different ways, worse ways. This time other people get hurt. This time, anyone who comes to save you dies. You think you're over it, and you are, but when that dream comes it pulls you back. Not in a cowering in a corner way. Not in a fear at every strange person who looks at you while you're at the store way. It is this deep, quiet darkness that sits on your heart and makes smiling impossible. It is a heaviness in your brain that tells you that you're still thinking about it, even when you're doing something else; even when you don't realise you're thinking about it. Hopefully it will fade, as all dreams fade, as the scars and fear faded long ago, and once again, you'll be over it.

[just-shower-thoughts]

I would pay a lot of money to see every “I was born in the wrong time period” person put into a reality TV show where they have to authentically live in that time period.

[magaoidh]

I am at war Every day brings a new battle to be fought Often on two fronts The allied forces of my mind and body working in tandem Like dual assaults on land and from sea Infantry and Navy with an inexhaustible armory And I am a fortress without battlements exposed on all sides This is what life is like with a chronic illness

[magaoidh]

And even in all this darkness There is beauty to be found We must only open our eyes And our hearts Be kind Choose love Remake the world

[magaoidh]

When we lie in bed, watching a movie or one of our shows, you take my hand in yours and hold it tight. It seems no matter where we are, nor what we are doing, we are almost always holding hands, and I often think how lovely it would be to die like that; old and grey, a full life spent happily together, and in the end we both move from this world to the next, your hand in mine, just as it was when we were alive. How lucky are we two, to have found a love so deep, and so well matched, that to die holds no fear, so long as we lie side by side, and hand in hand?

[just-shower-thoughts]

My first instinct when I see an animal is to say hello. My first instinct when I see a human is to avoid eye contact and hope it goes away.

[michellepsychologist]

Silence is the language of God, all else is poor translation. In silence there is eloquence.

Rumi 

[wordsnquotes]

The world is indeed full of peril and in it there are many dark places. But still there is much that is fair. And though in all lands, love is now mingled with grief, it still grows, perhaps, the greater.

J.R.R. Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings

[myawesomequotes-com]

I hate small talk. I want to talk about atoms, death, aliens, sex, magic, intellect, the meaning of life, faraway galaxies, music that makes you feel different, memories, the lies you’ve told, your flaws, your favourite scents, your childhood, what keeps you up at night, your insecurities and fears. I like people with depth, who speak with emotion from a twisted mind.

Breagha Young   

[wnq-writers]

And then one day, you wake up and realize that there is no way to go back to the way things were. Because people change, people leave, and people die. And this world we live in waits for no one.

iwantitall420 

[universesruler-blog]

[quotemadness]

It was amazing how many people spent their whole lives in places where they never intended to stay.

Terry Pratchett 

[butterflyflyingsworld]

[garettphotography]

Wistman’s Wood | GarettPhotography

[desert-bluffs-radiostation]

An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth. Who's teeth and eyes are we exchanging anyway? We don't tell

Strex-Corp