How the fuck was he supposed not to kiss her?
Yet he was still holding it together, somehow. Ten years of happy memories were gnawing at the back of his mind, reminding him what he would be risking. He’d managed not to ruin it for so long, why give up now..? He’d been through all of this already, and so many times. All the arguments and internal struggles had been mulled over and over for literally years. And yet each time it felt as if his very being was splitting in two unreconcilable halves, and it had often left him tossing and turning night after night, sometimes for weeks on end. Every once in a while he’d even had to distance himself from her for a few days just to cool off.
But this time he could feel his resolve wearing down. He’d fought for so long, fought against something he knew was right for him, something he needed. It had poisoned any other attempt at love, made a wreck out of him… And the worst part? It was all crumbling to dust. He could sense it. All these years of struggling - in vain.
No. He wouldn’t let it. He hadn’t endured all of that just to mess up at the finish line. He’d kept this bottled so well, and she just meant too much..
Alas, the touch of her fingers was to be his undoing.
He closed his eyes, trying to block out the insane craving. Maybe if he just.. survived this moment.. Maybe things would fall into place again. But each beat of his racing heart proved him wrong, over and over again. If there was such a thing as a point of no return, he’d crossed it. The battle was long lost.
But, hell, if he was going to screw up, might as well do it right.
There was something dark to his eyes as he opened them to look at Snow. He only gave her a split second to back off before completely giving in. His free hand gripping her by the back of her neck, his hold around her waist tightened as he pulled her in. Lips crashed into hers with a force he’d normally never resort to, but could no longer control. Years and years of suppressed feelings flooded him as he held her flush against his chest, eyes closed and chills running up and down his whole body.
This felt much better than he could’ve ever imagined it. And even if he did end up regretting it…
It would still be worth it.