i'd like to spend less time on screen . I 'd like to do stuff i want to do . Stuff i have to do . But i don't . I spend countless hours, everyday, on my screen, on youtube, on twitter or tumblr . Sometime i do little reading, a little chess, a little drawing . But it's so much less that what i would like to do . I can barely concentrate . I tried blocking access to stuff, but i can just unblock it most of the time . When i don't , i can easily just not do anything . People, please what do you think could help ?
i don't know what to do. i'd dont have thing like adhd . or maybe i'm just not diag who know but i don't fully think i have it. i just want to destroy my access to electronic devise, but i can't because what i want to work in is asking access to it, aka drawing,but then if i have access to it i don't work on what i have
This is just a reminder to those who say Zutara was supposed to be cannon! Google is free! (NOTE: I am not hating the ship. I find it cute. I just hate false information!)
Google is free, AI is a waste of resources (and not something you should rely on if you hate false information!) And critical thinking is a skill. Scrolling down to check the search results, however, takes very little effort.
An Analysis of Consent in Yue and Sokka and Katara and Aang’s relationship
Because I’ve seen some people make some false equivalences.
So here we have our pining hero. It’s nighttime, and this show LOVES to set stormy personal confrontations between two characters at night, particularly ones dealing with the romantic department (psst, it’s the moon symbolism).
In “The Waterbending Master,” Sokka engages in a tentative courtship with Yue, who returns his affections, but sends him some mixed signals. This culminates in the moment when she suddenly bursts into tears and runs away upon witnessing Pakku talk about his arranged marriage to Kanna. Sokka then goes after her so that he can comfort her and they talk about their relationship.
In “Ember Island Players,” Aang gets increasingly angry about his onscreen portrayal in the play, until he suddenly stands up and rushes outside. Katara goes to find and comfort him, and they talk about their relationship.
Yue: What do you want from me?
Sokka: Nothing. I just want you to know, I think you’re beautiful, and, I never thought a girl like you would even notice a guy like me.
Yue: You don’t understand.
Yue asks Sokka what he wants, and Sokka says he wants nothing. He wants to know her, and obviously he is hoping for more, but he doesn’t impose anything on her. He is modest and humble, straightforward and honest, and doesn’t assume that she should return his affection for her.
Aang: Katara, did you really mean what you said in there?
Katara: In where? What are you talking about?
Aang: On stage, when you said I was just like a … brother to you, and you didn’t have feelings for me.
Katara: I didn’t say that. An actor said that.
Aang: But it’s true, isn’t it? We kissed at the Invasion, and I thought we were gonna be together. But we’re not.
In the scene between Aang and Katara, in contrast, Aang immediately confronts Katara and places the burden of his feelings on her. He accuses her of saying something she didn’t say and Katara at first doesn’t even know what she is being accused of. He then makes assumptions about her feelings and their relationship, putting the onus on her to be responsible for his hurt feelings. I never thought a girl like you would even notice me vs I thought we were gonna be together.
Both Aang and Sokka misunderstand their love interests in this situation, but the difference is that Sokka makes no assumptions about Yue’s feelings, and she actually reciprocates. Aang makes accusations towards Katara and she does not reciprocate.
Sokka: No, no. See, that’s the thing. I think I do understand now. You’re a Princess, and I’m … I’m just a Southern peasant.
Yue: No, Sokka …
Sokka: It’s okay. You don’t have to say anything. I’ll see you around, okay?
Sokka is fully prepared for Yue to say no, and tells her that it’s okay if she does. He accepts whatever reason she wants to give for turning him down, even if it’s a bad reason.
Katara: Aang, I don’t know.
Aang: Why don’t you know?
Katara: Because, we’re in the middle of a war, and, we have other things to worry about. This isn’t the right time.
Aang: Well, when is the right time?
Katara: Aang, I’m sorry, but right now I’m just a little confused.
Sokka tries to understand Yue’s perspective, while Aang can’t seem to understand Katara’s. Whereas Sokka gives Yue room to say no, Aang puts pressure on Katara, which naturally makes her feel less sure about her feelings for him and less inclined to reciprocate. You don’t have to say anything vs Why don’t you know? And I’ll see you around vs Well, when is the right time?
And then there’s the kiss.
Neither Yue nor Aang asked for consent. Both their partners are surprised. But body language and dialogue and actual clarity about what the two characters feel for each other make all the difference.
Katara’s body language during the conversation with Aang before the kiss is very closed-off and uncomfortable. She has her arms crossed, she’s fidgety, she’s turned away from Aang or only half turned towards him. And after the kiss, she pulls away immediately and looks visibly uncomfortable.
Then angry.
Katara: I just said I was confused!
Contrast that with Yue and Sokka:
Sokka: Okay, now I’m really confused. Happy, but confused.
Do we really need to explain the difference between angry confused and happy confused? Kissing Yue was clearly something Sokka wanted, and he doesn’t pull away from Yue afterwards. Contrast that with Katara immediately pulling away, putting her hand over her mouth like she’s shocked at what Aang just did, and running away in anger and hurt.
What Aang did was a violation of Katara’s consent, and is treated like one. Katara is upset afterwards, Aang reprimands himself afterwards, and they become more distant with each other afterwards until the finale when they suddenly decided they lurve each other. Yue explains to Sokka that she does like him a lot but that they can’t be together, although their feelings for each other only continue to grow from there.
Yue also shows an incredible amount of maturity when she tells Sokka that they can’t just be friends, because she has romantic feelings for him and it’s too confusing for her, and because she knows that even though Sokka is willing to be friends, he is hoping for something more. Contrast that with Aang being unwilling to accept Katara seeing him as a friend or little brother and seeing those statements as the worst thing in the world, vs his onstage actor declaring that he’s perfectly content with Katara’s friendship and that being treated like an insult.
The thing is, that this doesn’t even have to be a contest. Aang knew he was in the wrong for kissing Katara in that scene. He could have apologized, he could have decided that he was happy with being friends with Katara because his relationship with her was more important than his attraction to her. He could have made the decision that it would be too confusing and upsetting to be friends with her if he couldn’t be in a relationship with her. Imagine that playing a part in Aang’s path to enlightenment in the finale. Imagine him reaching a purer love for Katara and then Katara choosing to be with him romantically after they both have a stronger understanding of their relationship.
“Ember Island Players” just…really drops the ball in the romantic department, and craps on both Yukka and Sukka at the same time, by making a cheap joke out of Sokka’s grief over Yue.
I love Sukka, and one of the things that is great about it is that they actually communicate well and their relationship is not written as a source of drama. Most of the time. In “Ember Island Players,” though, we get this scene where Sokka shushes Suki, who obviously has no idea why Sokka is mooning (heh) over this other girl and gets offended by it, while Sokka is clearly upset. This is an especially weird scene since Sokka and Suki had a conversation about Yue and Sokka’s grief previously. Suki’s comment that she didn’t know Sokka made out with the moon spirit shows that she clearly didn’t know that Yue was the girl that he lost before. Suki is painted as a jealous, jilted caricature and Sokka’s grief is made fun of.
When I first noticed this, I looked through the transcript of the episode, because surely Sokka and Suki have a conversation about it later. They do talk later, but do they talk about this? No, they talk about Suki sneaking Sokka backstage to give jokes to his actor. Of course.
My list of Zutara recs for @all-manic-no-disco got really long (to nobody's surprise but my own, probably) so here's a whole post with them. Most are post-canon like @senlinyuwrites's “The Sun, the Moon, and the Truth."
Oneshots:
"he tastes like smoke and freedom" (PWP but beautifully written): https://archiveofourown.org/works/54718675#main
They're two koi fish swimming in a pond together. Never touching. Endlessly orbiting. Until a fateful night when Uncle Iroh buys them tea and the ripples in the water disturb the established status quo.
A few days after the Agni Kai, Katara finds Zuko in the turtleduck gardens, but she's not sure he's recovered enough to be completely lucid. Especially when she overhears him talking about her-and especially when he smiles so brightly she might melt.
“it's late and i think it's about time for you and me to get closer” (AU, also smutty and absolutely gorgeous, tender prose): https://archiveofourown.org/works/23255200
He is a study in contradictory terms, sharp lines and harsh angles that melt into soft skin and gentle touches; and Katara cannot think of a time when she will not be fascinated by him.
Multi-chapter works:
“and you feel your heart (taking root in your body)”: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7146866/chapters/16227239
After everything - the comet, the war, the coronation - Katara tries to find the road back to herself. Somewhere along the way, she also finds the road to Zuko.
Katara's ambition, so long set aside for the good of others, breaks free and sets fire to her soul. Or, Katara has a vision of her canon future, casts it aside, and becomes a world-changing politician instead.
“didn't know my heart” (very good S2 AU): https://archiveofourown.org/works/10677339/chapters/23639352
And yet, in a matter of days, she has managed to worm her way under his skin, has cracked open his rib cage and has begun to patch up the endless amount of wounds on his heart.
“Suffering will be your teacher” (the time-travel fix-it I didn’t know I needed): https://archiveofourown.org/works/53864932/chapters/136337677
Zuko falls asleep on the evening of his official coronation, when he’s twenty-one-years old and has finally reached his majority. Zuko wakes on the morning of the Agni Kai with his father, eight years earlier.
This is annoying for several reasons, like the fact that the War is still ongoing, that he has zero friends, and that Ozai is not in jail. It’s time to scheme.
@all-manic-no-disco, I hope you enjoy any and all of these! Let me know what your favorites are!
The way he closes his eyes in anticipation of her touch, the nervousness and uncertainty. The intensity and vulnerability in his expression, and the genuine desire for a connection.
Can you link some of the Zutara metas you were reading? Can't quite seem to find any :(
:)
On Canonicity:
post The (Un)importance of canonicity and how Zutara isn’t less valid
post Zutara fan-retellings can be tomorrow’s canon (like Greek myths and Disney movies)
On Writers/Creators:
post Ehasz v. Bryke. Team Ehasz writes Katara’s agency and Aang’s challenges
post on possible Book 4 and Ehasz’s plans
post “Bryke has a history of undoing growth and progress”
On ATLA Relationships:
post Narrative Structure: Zutara, Kataang
post Want vs Need: Zutara, Taang, Kataang
post Consent: Yue/Sokka, Sukka, Kataang
post The Beginning & End of Zuko’s Redemption Arc: Zutara, Maiko
post Paralleling Threat Scenes: Zutara, Maiko
post Katara’s healing highlights Zuko’s responsibility and Aang’s levity
youtube video A humorous and thorough discussion on the writing of Zutara, Kataang, and Maiko
...Z-Z-Zutara:
post even non romatically zutara is meaningful. you can’t take out zutara without compromising the story or character arc.
post Southern Raiders: BRYKE v EHASZ, pro v anti zutara, understanding the discourse
post Zutara’s Tribute: Righteous Anger. Desmond Tutu
post Standing Next to Each Other at the Moment of Catharsis
post The Omashu Lore x Crossroads of Destiny
post Established Connection in COD
vs. post Missed Connection in COD
post On Facing Trauma and Forgiveness (Zuko-Ozai // Katara-YonRah)
post In Defense of “I’ll save you from the pirates”
post Their Healthy Expression of Grievances
post It’s not an issue of trust for Katara
post Debunking Anti Zutara
post The Search comic: Z/K friendship not found
post Anti-Comics: “One of these pics are not like the other”
post Zutara lets Katara accept the ambiguity (TSR + post agni kai)
post Zutara’s hug
post Zuko’s scar // Katara’s necklace
...Criticizing Kataang:
post Katara sees Aang as Messiah
post Kataang is kinda cute--oh, never mind.
post Kataang as male fantasy (Bruce Babs // Kataang)
post “abandoment-issue” Katara x “runaway-issue” Aang
post How Kataang is poor storytelling
post Why Kataang is not a perfect ending for Aang’s arc
post Criticizing Kataang’s EIP kiss
vs. post Justifying Kataang’s EIP kiss
post Aang idealizes Katara into dichotomy
vs. post Aang does not obstruct Katara agency
post “Kataang is boring and cute when not actively aggravating.” How Kataang undermines ATLA thematics and character arcs.
post They’re not bff: Aang can’t connect with Katara’s darker emotions, TSR
my post Debunking Kataang parallels: The Southern Raiders // The Avatar State
post How The Fortuneteller is Anti-Kataang
post North and South comic, and how it proves against Kataang.
post debunking Kataang*rs
…Criticizing Maiko:
post not the Zuko we know
post Zuko is toxic to Mai
post Mai is toxic to Zuko
post Song, Katara, Mai touching Zuko’s scar
vs. post Mai touching Zuko scar = her true love, and his love.
post Maiko dysfunctional relationship and lack of physical intimacy
post The Truth and Irony of the Creator's Pro Maiko Comment. Maiko is A Tumultuous Headache.
On Characters:
…Katara Deserves Better
post Katara “Consumed by Destiny” series: Working Backward on Katara’s entire narrative from LOK, comics, to ATLA
post The destiny framework is Katara’s downfall
post Against LOK Katara: on "misogyny," writing and team writers
post Against LOK Katara: Trophy Wife
vs. post In favor of LOK Katara: she’s still great
post The Runaway: Katara’s emotional isolation
post The Search: Katara insists she’s happy
post What about Katara, the last southern waterbender, and her culture?
post Against post atla Katara: none of Katara’s accomplishments matter in the context of LoK
post Katara is a fighter > a healer. “We know the mindset of waterbending and bloodbending, but never learned the philosophy or mindset behind healing.”
post Anti Atla Comic : Katara has no autonomy, is a damsel in distress, and is Aang’s supportive armcandy 🙄🤮
..Aang Critical
post “yes Aang, tell us more about how you forgave the people who murdered the Air Nomads and the people who stole Appa.”
post who says Aang let go of Katara in COD?
post Aang’s incomplete Avatar arc and his narrative favoritsm
post Aang’s not Peter Pan, he needs to grow up, and that’s valid criticism.
...Mai Critical
post Why is Mai hated
...Anti ATLA Comics:
post atla girls butchered in comics
post The Promise… to murder Zuko
post The Promise… to sit by Aang and murder Zuko
post About the Promise of killing Zuko and Gaang’s OOC
post Why isn’t Katara a founder? “I mean Republic City started with Yu Dao and Katara literally saved everyone there from their own stupidity.”
post North and South: pro Sokka x Katara, anti Kataang
post apparently Aang energybends his kids as punishments
Saw people being weird about the Southern Raiders episode again, and I started a long response but it was sooooooo long, I thought I should just make a separate post.
Here’s the thing: the Southern Raiders episode is about two things - on the surface it’s about Zuko, Katara, and misplaced anger. Thematically, though, this episode is about forgiveness and negotiating where forgiveness fits into the overturning of oppressive regimes.
I’m just here to talk surface level today. Maybe one day I’ll delve into the thematic stuff (which I think is also so well done). What’s brilliant about this episode is that even the surface level hits more than just the surface - it’s complex, filled with a lot of subtext. Recently I saw someone lament that it’s weird that this episode seems to reinforce the idea that Katara blames Zuko because of her mom’s death - but this reading of the episode really takes things at face value, and I think we need to look deeper than that.
What always strikes me about this episode is that before it happens, the audience sort of assumes that Katara is angry at Zuko because his actions caused a lot of harm to Aang. But once we get to her confrontation with Zuko, she names the source of her anger as something different: I was the first person to trust you, she says, and you turned around and betrayed me. This is the first thing she says to Zuko that makes an impression on him likely because it feels like the first real thing she says to him about her anger, beyond just aggressively taunting.
But it’s also…ridiculous. He “betrayed” her?? They had no agreement, no alliance! He chose his sister over some random girl he had one conversation with, an action that, as smart as we’ve seen Katara be, shouldn’t have been all that surprising to her. I think the wording here is very important that she trusted him and he betrayed her, because it should set off some alarm bells in your head, the absurdity of the accusation. And it points to the truth: Katara is directing her anger at Zuko, sure, but who is she really mad at?
It has to be herself. She trusted Zuko, like an idiot, and then Zuko almost got Aang killed. That’s why, for the first time in the show, her anger spins her so out of control. Because she’s not putting the anger in the right direction, not working through it. Anger has a very interesting role in ATLA because the show never really suggests that anger, at its core, is a bad thing, which is a radical position for a kids show in 2005. Katara is the best evidence of this, since her anger 99% of the time is a life giving force interconnected with her hopefulness; the show celebrates her anger more often than it punishes it. But in TSR, her anger is killing her because it’s different than usual. It’s tied up her guilt, and instead of feeling it and working through it, she’s just pushing it on someone else.
It’s also telling and important that Katara starts blaming Zuko for her mom’s death. Again, this is misplaced, but it’s no wonder she would be thinking about her mom in the wake of her renewed guilt over what happened to Aang. Her mom, after all, also died because of her.
This is the crux of the episode: Katara feels intense guilt and anger over her mother, and she places it all on Zuko because let’s be honest - she blames herself for all of this, and it all ends up tied together, her guilt her anger. I have no doubt that the person she’s most angry at is herself, unable to do anything to save her mother. And then years later she turns around and trusts ZUKO, of all people - how stupid was that? I mean just LOOK at the way that Katara had spent years turning herself into a caretaker for everyone around her. At first this just seems like a trauma response to losing her mom at a young age - but once we know that her mom died to protect Katara, died in her PLACE - it becomes clear, to me anyway, that Katara making herself into a caretaker at 14 is wrapped up in her guilt and anger over her mom. It’s a punishment, in many ways; she has to take over her mom’s role because her mom died in her place.
Perhaps the final sort of evidence for me that Katara is actually mad at herself in this episode is that Zuko, king of self-loathing, becomes her mirror, her sounding board in this episode. People like to argue that Zuko takes Katara down a “dark path,” but he seems to me more like a beacon in the midst of her turmoil. Placing him next to her, it’s a poke to the audience. Remember? Zuko said not so many episodes ago that he was mad at himself. By the time he joins the gaang, his anger has clearly been redirected at his father; it’s closer now to the anger that Katara most often feels, that hopeful, life giving anger. And allowing Zuko to guide her through this side quest is a reassurance: Katara will work through her anger too.
At the end of the episode, Katara says she’s ready to forgive Zuko. I think this is why people take at face value that she was genuinely angry with him, that her anger at him was a pure expression of her rage and hurt and not a muddied one. But I’d argue that her verbal forgiveness of him isn’t about his “betrayal,” it’s about the themes of the episode - she’ll probably never forgive Yon Rha, she says, a vow to remember the wrongs done in the past - but by forgiving Zuko, she’s saying that she’s willing to collaborate for a better Fire Nation of the future, a more just world. And now that she’s been able to confront and work through her anger at herself, she’s in a balanced place to do so.
Honestly, I think if the true source of Katara’s l anger about all this really was Zuko, they wouldn’t have the relationship that they do by the end of the show. They clearly really trust each other and care about each other by the end, and I think that if Katara really felt betrayed like she says, she would have held back her heart a little bit, keeping them at allies but never quite friends.
And ya know what? This is one of those episodes of ATLA that refuses to spoon feed you the answers, which I really like. It offers a lot of subtext for good, old fashioned analysis and argument, and it’s why it’s one of my favorite episodes - plus it’s an episode that REALLY brilliantly puts the focus on Katara and complicates her character, and I love that.
Also From Microsoft’s own FAQ: "Note that Recall does not perform content moderation. It will not hide information such as passwords or financial account numbers. 🤡
Because this has mostly been talked about with Windows 11, heads-up that this installed itself on every Windows 10 computer in our house with this week's update.
figuring out how to get rid of screen addiction is like trying to figure out how to stop a nicotine addiction while also having a job centered around smoking cigarettes and having half your social life be in smoke breaks
Ok, I've seen this sentiment before, but the amount of Kindle Unlimited ads I've been seeing is forcing me to repeat it-
Kindle Unlimited is offering two free months of unlimited ebooks. As a trial. Which will then become a paid subscription.
Your local library is offering unlimited ebooks all the time. Forever. No contracts, no predatory practices, no tracking of how long you spend on each particular page in the hopes that information about your habits can be sold for a profit.
Use your library. They want so badly to give you all of the things for free.
People are getting mad at Amanda over this, but I want to focus on the soft confirmation here that what happened between Ekko and AU Powder paralleled what happened between him and Jinx.
