welcome to my twisted ankle

THROW IT AT HIM NOT ME

[cartooncoyote]

[clramatic]

when people text you first but then don’t respond ??????! …..wyd?????? ….. what ya want??????

[ahhlurkin]

[thebootydiaries]

[thebootydiaries]

I'm Thinking About Him.............Are U ?

[canadad-deactivated20171111]

why would she sell sea shells by a sea shore when you can just pick them off of the ground for free that’s not how you run a business

[sharkchunks]

She’s sold sea shells by the seashore since shapely seashore seashells stay scarce. Since she sells superior shells searchers spend centuries searching for, seldom selling simple shells, so she still sustains solid savings.

[weedmonger]

[capslockapocalypse]

I couldn’t even read that in my head

[erarg]

[screenshotsofdespair]

[firelorcl]

nobody’s dick is big when you think of how small we are in the universe

[ruinedchildhood]

[zackpaslay-deactivated20190708]

15 minutes into disneyland and chill and he gives you this look

[pixelatedboobs-blog]

[cuteasianboyfriend]

when a hot person walks by and accidentally rubs against you

[skyliath-blog]

Daughter tells her Dad he’s going to be a Grandpa [x]

[falenstar78]

When he says “really” ;’)

[bitt3rfruit]

Never leave this un-reblogged

[cumberbuddy]

What a dear human being he is. 

[rossana]

[mermaidsandcats29]

OMG YAY!

[habboheroes]

[bromar-deactivated20130912]

[shavingryansprivates-deactivate]

get a hold of yourself tropicana lemonade

[turing-tested]

there was this really cute woman at a con dressed like toriel once and i told her she was a milf and shes like “i have an open relationship i can show you how much of a milf i can be” and i almost did it but her kids my age and how fucking awkward would it have been to go to the homestuck photo shoot the next day and look someone in the eye knowing i fucked their mom

[illness-deactivated20180325]

this is the worst post on this website

[snoopingasusualisee]

[butt-princess]

why would you have a problem looking someone in the eye knowing you fucked their mom, thats empowering, thats high T as fuck. 

[butt-princess]

you thought she was hot, she was dressed as a fantasy charector, and she looked you in the eye and told you she wanted to have sex with you, and you made up a reason not to do it. this fucking generation eats too much gmo soy, holy fucking shit, we’re gonna have to make replicants to save the human race at this point, jesus fucking christ. whats next “i felt uncomfortable fucking her becuase she had a dog and i didn’t want to make her dog feel bad becuase having a dog is like having a kid and i wouldn’t want to fuck someones mom thats mean” like just admit it, you pussed out, you were scared for some god damned reason, you probably jack off too much and eat too much fucking junk food and were afraid you wouldn’t be able to stay hard. 

[turing-tested]

NOW this is the best post on this website

[itsaubreylmfao]

i’m funnier in real life but also uglier