i'm no sweetheart.

who is to say what the truth is when everyone is blind to what they don't want to S E E ? it's all a lie. yeon mari—; gal.actic's lead vocal. one of south korea's most prominent sexy icons.

[marifmd-blog]

miaxfmd:

hyejung holds her breath at mari’s actions, already over thinking. had she been too direct? she should have just kept quiet. this happens in an instant, mixing with her concerns for the older girl. when mari agrees hyejung almost breathes out a sight of relief, though the worry for mari still stays. she thinks about saying something before deciding not to, nodding for the nth time that day before opening her container and eating a bite of her food. 

✧･ﾟ: *  —  food. it’s always both heavenly and sinful. on her good days, mari can eat without a problem. she has an appetite she largely neglects during her bad days ( which are her NORMAL days to begin with ). but today is a normal day, one that reminds her that there’s MORE to be lost. but she eats in silence for the most part, allowing herself a taste of the food she had purchased for the shoot. spacey is accurate, she muses. her mind is already in the bathroom.

[oldidhaeyeon]

before i fall.

@marifmd

TW: suicidal thoughts, panic attack

(circa two months ago)

blackness.

that was all haeyeon could see. the darkness was making her vision hazy, her limbs felt both as heavy as lead and weightless as if they were made of feathers. she forced herself to breathe; once in, once out, and even that wasn’t stopping the palpitations she could feel as her heart beat wildly in her chest. there was fire building in her lungs and tears stinging at her eyes, yet she refused to let them fall. not just yet. fumbling, she kept her palm against the wall to help keep her semi-balanced as she walked as fast as she could to the rooftop for fresh air.

to say that haeyeon was shocked at seeing ash and daeun together would be the biggest understatement that the world would ever know. daeun, her best friend, her whole entire fucking world that didn’t hide anything from her… was with ash? and didn’t even have the goddamn courtesy to let haeyeon know? the hurt was churning inside her, her head swimming with thoughts, bad bad bad thoughts. thoughts she hadn’t had since the last time she had tried to kill herself bad. 

you’re not good enough for love. you’ve never been good enough for love. do you really think anyone would want disgusting, used goods like you? the world would be better without you, hell, daeun would be better without you. she doesn’t even care about you enough to tell you that she’s seeing someone and she’s supposed to be the person who cares about you the most? shows how important you are. no one would even care if you jumped right off this ledge…

shaking her head, haeyeon pushed back those thoughts, tried to bury them behind thoughts of daeun’s smile and promises of loving each other through good and bad. of course, what daeun saw as a best friend love, haeyeon saw as a you saved me when i was drowning and i depend on you to make my life worth living love. the tears that she tried holding back fell freely onto the grey top of the roof underneath her feet. stumbling backwards, haeyeon felt her back hit the wall that held the door to the staircase, and her knees crumbled under her. she tried to focus on her breathing as her lungs felt like they were breaking inside of her chest. wrapping her arms around her knees, she rested her forehead on them and tried to make herself into the smallest ball possible.

and that’s when she heard the door open.

[marifmd-blog]

✧･ﾟ: *  —  there’s an unlit cigarette resting between her lips, a tall tumbler filled with TEQUILA in the other. it looks like water for the most part, save for the strength of the SMELL that fills the air as soon as she opens the cap. it was another night with yura, another night of DESTRUCTION between two broken souls who enable more devastation. the things they do to distract themselves—- mari can only DIVERT her attention away from it all even more.

the rooftop is calling out to her. and so there she goes, walking quickly before the effects of liquor impede her ( though perhaps falling down the stairs wouldn’t be too bad of an option at this point ). as the door opens, cold air hits her face. yet the warmth from the alcohol blanket makes it unnoticeable. but there’s not enough time to bask in the glory of the nothingness of the sky; what she sees next is a sight she’d never have WANTED to see.

now normal people would move quickly, envelop the other in their arms and say soothing words. but when had yeon mari ever been normal?

she lights up her cigarette and takes a long drag before taking a seat next to her fellow group member, placing the tumbler of tequila on the ground between the pair of them. ❛ yeah, life is shit. ❜ is all she comments; no words of consolation, no “it’s going to be okay”s, no “what’s wrong? how can i help?”. mari isn’t really the COMFORTING type. but she’s more than willing to sit there and be silent company.

and perhaps reaffirm the idea of a shitty world that does nothing but break people.

[marifmd-blog]

( ˚ ⟡ silence ⦙ ft. jeonghyun )

[marifmd-blog]

fmd-john:

“You never let me joke around about my flaws, you know, Mari-ah?” Jeonghyun playfully huffed, adding and exaggerate pout, lip puffed out, for dramatic affect. Insults, even ones that were meant to tease, never seemed to come from Mari. That least ones that would be directed at Jeonghyun. Self-deprecating jokes never seemed to work as she quickly pointed out the good in whatever Jeonghyun was mentioning. It wasn’t that he was fragile or needed the comfort. Still, such kind words and gentle phrasing wasn’t something that Jeonghyun took lightly. Since childhood, they were luxuries for him. A luxury Mari supplied to Jeonghyun in multitudes and he earned all aspects of his friendship with him.

Anything he could do, knowing that there were times where her world dark and gloomy, Jeonghyun would do in order to get her to smile. If that meant a silly cookie with frosting to make it look like a lion or penguin caused a small smile, Jeonghyun felt that he was doing what he could to keep Mari as happy as he could make her. “I promised that you have not had the cutest bookie imaginable and that will be this cookie, alright?” Jeonghyun assured. He raised both eyebrows as if that guaranteed that he was correct. He lead them across the street and towards the location of BC headquarters.

✧･ﾟ: *  —  her head tilts in the slightest degree, kind eyes looking into her friend’s as her shoulders roll into a shrug. ❛ flaws... ❜ the word draws long, silence filling the air as she gathers her thoughts for a brief moment. ❛ i don’t know, jeonghyun. i think your flaws are what makes you unique. ❜ it’s rather strange, she muses. sure, she isn’t one to have the best reputation around. yet pleasantries and compliments roll off her tongue with ease whenever jeonghyun was involved. a soft spot, if you will. that’s what yeon mari has for this kind boy, whom she feels deserves more than he’s been given.

her eyes roll in response, her head shaking almost like an impulse. she heaves out a sigh and follows along the path, sneaking glances at the other from time to time. it’s a habit of hers, observing people—- him especially. he’s so... DIFFERENT from her and despite the time that’s passed, the trials and struggles of a friendship born between two people who seem to have nothing in common. ❛ okay, but what will you do if it’s NOT the best cookie i’ve had? ❜

[marifmd-blog]

fmdsumi:

sumi couldn’t really hide it, she was afraid of mari. the girl doesn’t really know how or why but she just finds herself running or hidding whenever the older female is around. maybe because of her personality? maybe because of what people say about her? and the wish member was not lucky this time around, normally if she sees mari she just runs but this time? they had to share a waiting room and sumi’s manager didn’t warn her beforehand. she opens her mouth once, twice. but nothing really comes out. ‘’s-sunbae’’, this was probably the first thing sumi ever said to mari, but she doesn’t make eye contact and her hands are in the door knob, ready to open it and run as fast as she can whenever she has the chance to do so.

✧･ﾟ: *  —  consider her ignorant, but she isn’t exactly completely aware of wish despite the girl group’s massive popularity. she’s met a couple of their members here and there ( for the life of her, she only really barely remembers that one girl—- mia; sooyeon too, but that’s a different case altogether ) but it’s not quite enough to say she has a relationship with them. ❛ oh, you can speak. cool. ❜ she comments sardonically as she hears the other’s words. probably doesn’t help the younger’s fear of her, mari muses silently. but she’s never been quite one to CARE. ❛ sit. show starts in a bit. ❜

[marifmd-blog]

( ˚ ⟡ my baby? ⦙ ft. arin )

[fmdar-blog1]

as much as arin wanted to stare at the unbelievably awestrucking senior, pupils dragged away from the woman’s contours. (she had to save herself from further embarrassment, anyway.) the little girl waddling closer instantly hooked arin’s heart. not even a second. like gravity was heavier around juhyun, arin soon crouched. she had meet the little lady eye to eye. “hello, pretty girl.” arin didn’t mean to stare (did she really not?) but as her fingers gave the kid’s head a pat, arin took the chance to study the child’s features. they had resemblance for mari’s (arin had glanced back and forth the whole time.) “kids, huh.” arin chuckled softly once her eyes levelled back to mari’s. “they’re both a blessing and a burden,” arin whispered the last word, dreading the possibility of juhyun hearing her. that was the least in arin’s ‘words to say to children’ list. “juhyun’s so pretty— she’s so pretty!” the brightness in arin’s eyes sparkled the longer she stared at juhyun. “i guess juhyun will really be pretty when her mom is gorgeous, no?” the woman’s eyes stared at juhyun the whole time, although the occasional glance at mari invited room for answers.

[marifmd-blog]

✧･ﾟ: *  —  there is limited OPPORTUNITY for people outside her friend group to see such a genuine SMILE on the idol’s face. with gal.actic not entirely being on the popular side, thus limiting their video views to promotions and fancams, it’s rare for them to truly gain INSIGHT into who mari is behind the scenes. her image ( apart from being a sexy icon ) is that of a tough girl who takes no shit from anyone, sometimes to a fault. and the media loves airing the bad criticisms. but her appearance on the return of superman with her brother’s family showed a side of mari that others wouldn’t have thought existed. ❛ i’m so glad she takes after her mom. ❜ she comments, placing an affectionate peck upon juhyun’s forehead. the yeon family has good genes but her brother truly found luck with his wife. she’s gorgeous.

[marifmd-blog]

fmdtrevor:

Trevor wasn’t really a particularly picky guy. When he showed up to events and photoshoots, he wore what he was told to wear and posed how he was told to pose. Unless there was something he really, really didn’t like about the whole thing as a whole. He was easy going, but he wasn’t a pushover, and if he didn’t like something he would most definitely open his mouth and speak up about it. He sat in his own chair, waiting for the makeup artist to come back to finish his makeup for the shoot, when Mari spoke up. “Hmm?” He glanced up from his phone, giving her outfit a once over. “I mean, do you really want to ask me for advice on what to wear?” He asked, a small smile on his lips. “I don’t really dress and go with the social norms when it comes to clothing. But if it’s something that you really feel uncomfortable with, tell them that you don’t want to wear it.”

✧･ﾟ: *  —  mari has never minded the sexy and provocative direction that her group had gone in; in fact, she embraces it wholeheartedly. the thing is—- she did know when things were appropriate or not. ❛ well, to my knowledge, it’s not a lingerie shoot we’re doing right now. ❜ her shoulders roll into a shrug as her gaze lingers on her reflection on the mirror. ❛ it’s not so much the outfit as it is the principle of things. ❜ mari hates surprises. she’s never been the ideal target for them. so when she’s told one thing and something else happens, the dissatisfaction clearly registers on her face. ❛ what did they tell YOU this shoot is for? ❜

[marifmd-blog]

( ˚ ⟡ the pure heart in me ⦙ ft. namjoon )

[marifmd-blog]

namjoonfmd:

         he was sort of hoping that once her brothers were told, they would be a-okay with it. then again, he wasn’t really sure about that. wasn’t he breaking some kind of.. ridiculous bro code that everyone was supposed to know. at least, apparently everyone BUT namjoon had known what exactly that was. he never actually mentioned not knowing it, he truly thought it was just something that was sillier than namjoon himself.  nonetheless, he put whatever that was aside. 

feelings were something that seemed to catch namjoon by surprise. but, it seemed to make a lot more sense as time had gone on and on. even though it may had taken a long while for him to admit such a thing. especially after the long time he had hid it in the back of his head, suppressing it for as long he probably could. though now that he had said that she was in his heart and those three words, everything felt nice.. it felt right. it was just him and mari taking on the world.. at least in secret. 

now, the only thing was her brothers and what exactly what they were going to think. which was going back to the thoughts that he was just having. he hoped they were okay with it, but he knew there were going to be long, long talks, if they did accept it. they knew namjoon and how he was, so it was going to be a-okay, right? hopefully, that’s what he thought. “i can tell them, if you want me to? or we can together.. whatever you want, i don’t mind.”

✧･ﾟ: *  —  she's a TEENAGER. newly debuted, an idol—- but still, she’s a teenager. the fact that namjoon feels the same way for her seems like this is all just one vivid fantasy. her crush on him kept growing, and eventually that crush developed into LOVE. a young love; the first. it’s exciting and terrifying all at once. falling in love should be illegal, she thinks. it’s capable of so much—- both good and bad. she can only hope that this all leads where they both end up HAPPY.

they’re probably worrying too much about her brothers at this point. in the end, there isn’t really much they can do. it’s mari’s life, it’s mari’s feelings. and while the little girl mari in the past always FOLLOWED what her family instructed her to do, she’s long since foregone that persona in favor of the stronger, more independent mari that’s now sitting in front of namjoon. ❛ we should tell them officially together. but i’m probably going to send a message in our family group chat tonight. ❜

sending a message to their group chat and actually telling them in person with namjoon are two completely different things. the group chat would be filled with JOKES and TEASING. in person, it’s probably going to be a lot more serious. ❛ we’ll be alright. my oppas like you as a person already. ❜ there’s again a smile on her face. anyone who can see her right now can tell how much happier she is already.

[famedexclusivearchive]

Fancam of Gal.actic's Mari goes viral

Gal.actic as a group is known for their sexy and provocative concepts, so it was no surprise when Gal.actic’s Mari made a special appearance in the 2017 Waterbomb Festival last July 29th and set the stage on fire. She performed a cover of How’s This? by Celine and a fancam of the song has been circulating around the web ever since. Lately, it’s been gaining attention on a viral level. 

The video shows Mari performing the song onstage in a white shirt and shorts while being hit by water throughout her performance. While there are criticisms regarding the sexy cover, fans of the group and the artist are quick to praise her ability to perform in high heels despite being hit by the water guns leaving her soaked and the stage wet. Along with its popularity in Korea, the video has been gaining international attention as well.

COMMENTS

[+ 502, -93] i’m not a gal.actic fan, but she’s talented to be able to do that with water guns hitting her

[+467, -103] mari unnie is very impressive. i would have slipped and fallen in those heels.

[+352, -178] dimensions should remind gal.actic that they’re idols, not strippers.

[+300, -82] it was a really good! i want to see mari do more covers

[+291, -123] there gal.actic goes again, getting half naked on stage for attention.

[+49, -57] why did no one tell me this would be happening? i want to be front row to shoot water at girls in white shirts

[marifmd-blog]

sms ⇢ mars: it's so comfy i use it as a pillow

sms ⇢ mars: NOT TRUE. YOU KNOW THE REASONS.

sms ⇢ mars: can't.

sms ➟ jae oppa: what, you're too chicken to accept your feelings?

sms ➟ jae oppa: there's a difference between 'can't' and 'won't' you dumb fuck.

[marifmd-blog]

( ˚ ✧ not enough / history )

[marifmd-blog]

fmdsian:

      contrary to his public image, he was a good boyfriend. he had so much love to give and he always tried his best to give it to the special people in his life. maybe it was jiyoung’s influence. the girl showed him what kindness looked like and her family showed him what love looked like. and it always stuck with him growing up, as he pulled himself and yeonhee out of busan and brought them into seoul. but something always got in the way and a part of him is thinking he and mari were going to end up the same way as him and soojin.

      “let me try it then.” he adjusted the chopsticks before digging in. he controlled his expression at first, pretending to think. but soon enough a smile ended up on his face and he affectionately reached out to pat mari’s head. “it’s delicious. you’re amazing.” the meat was melting in his mouth and it was arguably the most delicious thing he’d ever eaten. he picked up a piece and held it to her lips. “try your cooking. fall in love with your skill.” he grinned at her.

✧･ﾟ: *  —  she keeps a watchful eye on his reactions, relief overtaking hers as he compliments her food. it’s probably strange, she muses. the two of them didn’t exactly have the most ideal idol images out there, yet they were so good to each other. yeon mari, smiling and laughing freely? that’s a sight to behold. still, theirs is a relationship she wouldn’t give up for the world. it all just felt... RIGHT.

their meal begins and she can’t help but simply watch him in between bites of food. there’s something enchanting about siyoung that she can’t quite put into words. and anyone could see in her eyes, with the way they TWINKLE every time she looks at him, that she’s very much in love. ❛ i love you. ❜ she breaks the silence, her chin resting atop her palm as she simply gazes at him.

[marifmd-blog]

miaxfmd:

the turn of emotions in mari is so sudden hyejung finds herself a little bit surprised. there’s no reason for hyejung to be surprised, of course, but hyejung has always been in awe of her stage presence and confidence that she kind of had an image of her personality before getting to meet her.  in turn hyejung smiles, nodding. “alright, you just looked a bit spacey, sunbaenim. maybe you should rest a bit before we start recording?” she comments politely before walking over to the food and grabbing a container herself. 

✧･ﾟ: *  —  she chews on her food, the smile on her face promptly disappearing as she again starts to measure in her mind. the years of COUNTING calories have made it easy for her to estimate without the need for a SCALE. ❛ spacey? ❜ mari’s eyes narrow at the younger, not particularly fond of the word choice. then again, it’s probably accurate. her mind is elsewhere and it’s not anywhere good. ❛ yeah. ❜ she simply says in response to the suggestion. she pretty much already knows she’s going to go on a trip to the bathroom after the meal.

[marifmd-blog]

for @jihoonfmd

✧･ﾟ: * — does mari like being pushed around? absolutely not. it’s one of the biggest BANES of her existence, right up there with sasaengs who actually do the literal pushing around. they’re invited to a special event in jeju and it’s just her luck that her flight is on the same time as charm’s. as they deplaned and walked out into the open, she feels as though she’s gone DEAF. shrill screams, enough to shatter eardrums, fill the air. mari opts to mind her own business for the most part but a particular charm member catches her eye. there isn’t anyone in the industry who didn’t know the notorious choo siblings. but the way his face twitches in discomfort tugs at mari’s heart and brings out a defensive fire in her. she pushes past her own smaller crowd and pulls jihoon behind her. it’s probably funny, this tall kid standing behind mari, who isn’t exactly the tallest female idol around. charm’s fans see this event and begin to protest, trying to crowd around them once more. ❛ hold the fuck up. ❜ she starts saying, more to herself at first. it’s the next thing she says that pierces through even the loud noise, catching people's attention. ❛ the boy’s going to pass out from suffocation if you guys don’t back the hell up. ❜

[marifmd-blog]

sms ⇢ mars: mama why you gotta do that to me breakin my heart like this

sms ⇢ mars: but i miss u tho

sms ⇢ mars: also i stole one of ur bras

sms ➟ jae oppa: give me back my dream angels.

sms ➟ jae oppa: shit like that is why celine's not dating you yet, you know.

sms ➟ jae oppa: get your shit together and ask her out already.

[marifmd-blog]

✧･ﾟ: * — mari isn't fond of small talk. an icon of silence, she doesn't speak unless she has a reason to. yet when there are EMOTIONS running through her, she can't help but be a little bit more talkative; it's an impulse, as though WORDS can mask her feelings. in truth, the sudden chatter just causes more concern because it's simply not her. but she's THANKFUL that there isn't much silence to fill as the food arrives. ❛ huh? ❜ she's brought out of her thoughts and she nods. and then she smiles. which in itself is a red flag that she doesn't even realize is a habit when she's hiding something. ❛ yeah, i'm good. ❜ she picks up a piece of bulgogi from one of the containers, stuffing her face.

[marifmd-blog]

for sumi.

✧･ﾟ: * — there isn't much OPPORTUNITY for mari to meet other idols, save for those in dimensions who regularly see her in one of the practice studios or in the cafeteria. but for some reason her path keeps CROSSING with one particular girl group member. and the more mari sees her, the more she feels like something is odd. because every time their paths do intersect, the other girl is always running. is she practicing for a marathon or something? this particular instance, she's in the waiting room for a show. and she and the girl are to share the waiting room. she's listening origin's run when the door opens and sumi walks in. her gaze dart upwards toward the girl and she says, ❛ are you about to run now? ❜ the irony in her music selection is evident.

[marifmd-blog]

sms ⇢ mars: when has that ever sTOPPED ME THO AHHAHA

sms ⇢ mars: ok cant deny that but

sms ⇢ mars: ur special ily

sms ⟶ jae oppa: what a load of shit.

sms ⟶ jae oppa: every woman is special to you. :eye roll:

sms ⟶ jae oppa: i reject the love.

[marifmd-blog]

sms ⇢ mars: mars!! !1! !!!

sms ⇢ mars: holy fuck i saw the video

sms ⇢ mars: two words- mega boner

sms ⟶ jae oppa: words like that get you in trouble.

sms ⟶ jae oppa: but what's new?

sms ⟶ jae oppa: every woman gives you a boner. woman-obsessed freak.