CUTESY DEVIL!

"Yo!! If ya got a dream, your good ol' big sis Kuromi can make it come true, free of charge! ...But ya better act fast!" [ Private/selective. Written by Vincent. ]

[marilandmenace]

badlette​:

     That was what happened when you grew up under a megalomaniac. Was all that power worth it if it meant you were stunted by everyone around you? Eggette barely had an identity outside of that life and at such a young age, socialization was crucial. When did she ever have a friend that wasn’t built from nuts and bolts? The fact Kuromi showed a genuine desire to ‘help’ Eggette made her the most eligible for the fantasy position of a best friend. What better example of friendship did she have?

     So here was Elaina; the weirdo in the corner of the class that studied bugs and was friends with one of the scariest girls in school. And while she should have been used to Kurumi’s tough love, her best friend’s strength caught her by surprise every single time with a yelp. Elaina erupted in a quiet chorus of ‘Yes ma'am, sorry ma'am' as Kurumi began to lead her away from the house, sneakers scraping to keep up and plenty excited to see her best friend. 

     When she was given possession of her ear again, she straightened herself up with a long, long groan. “ I knoooooow. ” El signed, recalling the few times she volunteered (forced) to help Ivo. For all her love of tech and games, you’d have to pay her to be in the same room as him for more than 30 minutes. He was exhausting and seemed to attract exhausting people. “ I feel like I could hear him from 20 miles away if I tried. ”

     She already felt guilty for being late. But being alone with those two? She owed Kurumi something extra. Even if it meant she couldn’t splurge on herself, at least it might make her bestie happy.  “ Look, I’ll buy you some stuff with my money when we get there, okay? Let me make it up to you. You can use like. A quarter of my money. ”

   ‘Exhausting’ was definitely the understatement of the century. Between the old geezer’s ramblings about how ‘kids these days just aren’t good at video games anymore’, to his incredibly delusional monologuing about the theme park he is absolutely, definitely, INEVITABLY going to build, Ivo—or Eggman, as the local teens called him—was certainly an obnoxious character. And that’s not even getting STARTED on the obnoxious blue frat boy jock that WOULD NOT SHUT UP—

   Ah well, her thoughts were getting carried away. Needless to say, the reality of these colorful characters were all but nonexistent. However, this didn’t erase the unfortunate backstory that’d been set for Kurumi’s character. It all felt so real, like her memories had been rewritten. Sometimes the Dream Door was a scary thing.

   “Really, only a quarter of it?” Kurumi mused, not caring all too much about the actual money. “I thought you were a spoiled little princess! Ain’t your mom some kinda supermodel-scientist-rockstar? And your pops— Well, he’s kinda lame. But ain’t he some kinda big name scientist too?” ...She has parents. Why is she here? Why are WE here? Can’t she just—Whatever. Whatever.    “Eh, whatevs. I shook down some punkasses  for their cash.” School bullies, of course. “So I’m all set!”

   Luckily, it wasn’t a very long walk to the mall. Kuromi did her best to preemptively set a route that’d allow for the least amount of detours, to avoid breaking Eggette’s—or Elaina’s—little fantasy. They’d soon find themselves at the steps to a colorful little mall, the tidy rows and rows of cluttered-yet-cozy little shops lining the walls, and various booths for trinkets and snacks inbetween. Quite the popular mall amongst students for its cutesy charm and wide variety of stores, but thankfully not one any of her fantasy world’s real-life equivalents would find themselves at.    “So... Er...” What did teenagers even like to do? Hell if she knew anymore. “Where are we goin’ from here, El?”

[marilandmenace]

pleasemymel0dy​:

“Something to say about Kuromi? Hmm…” Well, My Melody had never really thought about it before, but now that Kuromi had mentioned it; she could think of quite a few things to say. Although, it probably wouldn’t be what she was expecting either. 

 “Ohh!” My Melody raised her paws into the air with a smile as if she understood. (She didn’t.)  “My Melo has lots of things to say, so listen up!” Then she crossed her arms, nodding sagely as she did so. 

“Like, today, Kuromi looks very nice in her black hood. Or, wow! Kuromi is so brave and responsibles to be adventuring out on her own! And…and…um…yeah. It’s like that.”

   . . .

   Surely, My Melo wasn’t THIS dense. C’mon Melo, you’re a grown-ass woman. ...Right...? Right. Without hesitation, Kuromi’s notebook found itself out and open, finding itself on a more recent entry.

   “KUROMI NOTE, NUMBER EIGHT-SEVEN-FOUR-FOUR-FOUR! Today, that AIRHEAD My Melo invited me to go shopping!” Kuromi omitted the part where she said yes because she was lonely. “But thanks to that DUMBASS getting distracted, my damn tail got caught in a revolving door! She left to ‘get help’, and I was stuck there for HOURS spinning and spinning!!!”

   “LIKE THAT!” Kuromi continued banging her head against this metaphorical brick wall. “GET MAD! SAY SOME SHIT ABOUT ME!! HOLD A DAMN GRUDGE FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE!!!”

   Hoo boy.

[marilandmenace]

badlette​:

           Have you ever felt as if you were ripped harshly out of a daydream? As if your whole reality vanished for the world of your creation, but suddenly reappeared before your very eyes. That’s how the girl suddenly felt, left blinking at the floor below. Like any dream, it was just enough to grasp but still vague enough to be incomprehensible; slipping away as fast as she was gathering her bearings. She always struggled with zoning out when left on her lonesome, yet the feeling was still new every time. 

          She gripped the sheets under her palms, taking in their texture and observing the bedroom around her — Not a thing out of place. The girl sighed with a foot tapping the hardwood floor of her bedroom. Working for him, huh? As if her social life couldn’t get worse… How bored must she have been to come up with something like that? And yet, it wasn’t so odd that she would object to the idea. 

                              I have to work on getting better sleep.

         The could-be Eggette’s eyes finally fell upon a calendar, where multiple circles and arrows surrounded a date. Elaina’s eyes blinked as she struggled to read the numbers from afar, and with the slow realization that she was still in her pajamas, she shot up instantly from the foot of her bed. Whatever dissociative troubles that plagued her were gone in an instant as she ran around her room to throw together an outfit. 

          Shit.           With her parents working longer hours, she was having a horrible time teaching herself responsibility. Shit. Shit, shit, shit. Today’s necessities were haphazardly thrown into her backpack. Her wallet, camera, snacks. She clipped her keys to her belt loop and began running down the stairs as she desperately punched numbers into her phone. Hopefully she didn’t upset her too much. She ran down the stars, the stomping of her feet echoing throughout the empty house. Elaina nearly tripped into the door as she reached for the handle and ripped the front door open. 

          … And has to skid to stop herself from crashing into her best friend.

   Aaaand there she was right on cue, Kuromi’s—or rather, Kurumi’s—best childhood friend. At least, that’s what the little scene Eggette’s dumbass milquetoast dreams decided to set up for her. Really, she didn’t even have any friends? What kind of miserable teenager doesn’t have at least one friend—

   ...Ah, right.

   This felt weird. And wrong. Whatever, notes were notes. Lights, camera, action.

   “Jeez, you’re completely fuckin’ HOPELESS, El. Do ya even know how long ya kept me waiting!?” Her banter wasn’t in mean spirits, of course. If anything, Kurumi was usually the reason Elaina was able to tell left from right sometimes. And of course, Elaina was always there to keep Kurumi’s horrendously red-hot temper in check when nobody else could.

   ...It’s called Method Acting, okay. Don’t look at her like that. Thankfully, Kuromi’s magic was able to fill her in on the details she’d been missing. Or at the very least, the details Eggette’s subconscious wanted to still hold on to.

   “I waited in front of that eggheaded geezer’s arcade for TWO HOURS. D’ya even know how OBNOXIOUS him and that loudass blue weirdo are? Ah, screw it. Let’s just get to that damn mall already, daylight’s burning.”

   With one swift well-practiced movement and a twist of her hand, Elaina would find herself getting dragged off by the ear, Kurumi’s platform boots stomping along aggressively.

[marilandmenace]

@roskaarotta​ continued from here!

   “Huh... a demon? Okay.” Her response was oddly casual, though mostly thanks to a mix of having her suspicions, and maybe kinda sorta having summoned literal demons from hell before. Long story. Although, she did have some follow-up questions... but best to explain herself first, probably.

   “Well, plain n’ simple, I grant people’s desires! Let’s just call it a hobby of mine. Sometimes I pluck some energy out of these people, but it’s harmless stuff. Real harmless.” A small nod, as she pulled out her Melody Key. “I used to have a partner that’d help me find targ-er, people in need! But now that he ain’t around, I gotta do things myself.” Best to not linger on that last note. She’s still mad about him.

   “Makes sense that something like a demon gives off weird energy signals, yeah?”

[marilandmenace]

   Inbox call!    Limit is whatever arbitrary number I feel while sending them.

[marilandmenace]

*returns after an entire month of absence with zero explanation*

[c0ffin]

im so evil *cries myself to sleep*

[marilandmenace]

badlette​:

The opportunity to grant any wish was something few could say they didn’t want. As the would-be dictator was handed just about anything her heart desired. Others may wonder, then, why on Mobius was she not satisfied? Eventually, the endless gifts were no longer enough - only offering a temporary distraction from the ever growing void in her heart.

Eggette scoffed at the question, placing her chin upon her hand. “ Have you heard that we’ve split this planet apart? Into multiple pieces. ” We. As if she contributed much to whatever the hell Eggman was thinking that day. Regardless of her contribution, the girl thought it was the best example to show how less than normal her life had become.

“ I can’t even - I can’t even step outside without risking prosecution. I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t be seen again if G.U.N spotted me. ” She was seconds away from turning Kuromi into the therapist she so desperately needed. The girl slowly slumped into her seat as her hands dragged down her face. She wasn’t looking forward to the next god they would inevitability screw up.

“ So yeah. Doing things over, “ Eggette sharply exhaled “ Can you do it it or not. I didn’t ask for your judgement. “  

   Oh, what Kuromi would give to split a planet in half. Preferably with My Melody falling between the gaps and burning up in the earth’s core. She already found herself meddling with dark gods and the very hopes and dreams of all living things, so what’s a little more power? And yet here we had Little Miss Sunshine wanting to replace deadly war machines and complete global domination with boba tea and a trip to the mall. Some people really do waste it all, huh.

   “Yeah, yeah, whatever, squander your potential.” Kids these days. This one’d probably be a hell of a lot less of a wreck if she listened to some MCR or something. Get an outlet, kid. “Y’know, if I was in your spot, things would be a HELL of a lot different around here.”

   Personal opinions be damned, a target was a target. Not only a normal target at that, but her ticket into many, MANY more! Pulling her Melody Key from seemingly thin air, she gave it a small twirl for wasted showmanship, a trail of dark energy flowing from the tips of its teeth. With a simple overhead swing, all would go dark, and Eggette’s incredibly dull and boring dream would come true. Whoop-de-freakin’-doo.

   “DREAM DOOR... OPEN!”

[marilandmenace]

pleasemymel0dy​:

My Melody listened to Kuromi’s explosive rant intently, and with genuine concern. ”Oh Kuromi-chan…” She remembered all those things that she’d read in Kuromi’s notes; and she wanted to make up for it! However, there was also something that she recalled her momma saying to her: ‘Not everyone will get along with you. Even with the best of intentions, you can still do someone harm.‘ It was a harsh truth, but My Melody had accepted it. 

“You’re all alone…? I see….this must be a journey of self-discovery..” My Melody closed her eyes and nodded her head sagely. “Okie then, My Melo will leave you to it. ….But before she does–” 

Drum roll please…

!!!

“Would you like a snack for the road?”

   “WHY are ya so— Do ya even— Can ya JUST—” 

   She sputtered to find ANY words for My Melo right now, but continuously failed to do so. Despite how understanding her rival tended to be, it always felt like trying to talk to a brick wall. A brick wall that wanted to give you a hug and care for you. As one would expect, it made it a bit hard for Kuromi to keep up her little narrative when the ‘source of all evil’ was this caring.

   “Look, I ain’t takin’ any snacks. Knowin’ YOU, they probably got poisoned somehow, or a damn meteor is gonna take me out the moment I REACH for ‘em. But thanks or whatever, I guess.” She waved away the basket of treats. “Just... don’t get in my way. I have important stuff to do.”

   My Melo didn’t need to know Kuromi was stockpiling Black Notes again. Not like she had a plan for them yet, anyway. Call her a creature of habit.

[marilandmenace]

   “This is OFFICIALLY the absolute WORST fuckin’ birthday OF MY DAMN LIFE.”

[marilandmenace]

pleasemymel0dy​:

“Sent me?” My Melody tilted her head, confused for a moment. …But then she smiled. “Oh Kuromi-chan, you’re so silly! No one sent My Melo here. She’s just going on an adventure, exploring the world.. ….And… then…that means…our meeting like this…it must be fate!” It felt like she hadn’t seen Kuromi in a very long time either; and she had missed her dear friend ever so much.

“What’re you doing out here?”

...

   Okay, breathe. You’re better than this, Kuromi. Your therapist said you shouldn’t let Her live in your head rent-free anymore. Just calm down, and don’t let this blood-curdling, gut-wrenching, fist-clenching, UNYIELDING RAGE get to you. You’re chill. Just inhale, and—

   “DON’T PLAY STUPID WITH ME, MY MELO!!” Her fists were balled up, absolutely SHAKING with the unquenchable bloodlust to be unleashed upon her vomit-inducing adversary. “EVERY TIME SHIT GOES WELL FOR ME, TOO WELL, YOU SHOW UP AND RUIN IT. WEEEEEEEEELL, THAT AIN’T GONNA HAPPEN THIS TIME, BECAUSE GUESS WHAT? I AIN’T GOT NOTHIN’ TO LOSE!! BUT THAT’S OKAY! I’M STRONG AND INDEPENDENT NOW!! I DON’T NEED HIIRAGI-SAMA OR HIS SNOT-NOSED BRO, I DON’T NEED DAR-CHAN, I DON’T NEED BAKU, AND I DEFINITELY DON’T NEED YOU AROUND HERE.”    The sharp inhale that followed could be better described as an agonized wheeze, her voice straining to finish her visceral rant.     “What I get up to ain’t NONE of your business, Melo!! EXPLORE SOMEWHERE ELSE.”

[marilandmenace]

roskaarotta​:

“ YOU’RE HERE- okay okay i just was talkin’ about you to someone else but you are LIKE- so optimal and the best one. sorry just … ?!”

she just was fixated on how cute she was … ! real and better than ever !!

“ just okay will keep that in mind but hey? uh welcome ‘round here … !! ”

   “Okay I have no fuckin’ idea what you’re tryin’ to say to me, but I think I understood like four words of that, so like, thanks I guess. Ya got a name, or should I just call you ‘The Groupie’?”

[marilandmenace]

@pleasemymel0dy​

   “WHO THE HELL SENT YOU HERE AND WHY.”

   Violence is the only option.

[roskaarotta]

“ OH MY GOD- A REAL CELEB FINALLY FOLLOWED ME.”

@marilandmenace​

[marilandmenace]

   “Finally, some damn RECOGNITION around here! Feel free to bow, or give me some compliments, preferably both.” The stupid little animal just kept prattling on, its dumb little smug aura at uncontrollable levels. “And before ya ask, I DO give autographs.”

[squeakitties]

[brxtalsimulation]

@marilandmenace || x

“It’s Triandra.” Their wings flutter in annoyance as they let out a long-suffering sigh. This little creature, whoever or whatever she was, was fully intent on being as annoying as possible. And if she was going to keep them from their job, well…

Triandra scoops her up in their arms, their hands clasped underneath her tiny little arms, and carries her to the other side of the room. They sit her down away from the victim on the ground, odd little key laid on the ground nearby. They give her a dispassionate pat on the head.

“Now, where was I…” Ah, yes.

The Flower of Sorrow illuminates in their hand as they turn to the victim. They nod their head towards Kuromi, as if instructing her to watch the professionals work.

[marilandmenace]

   “Alright, Tinkerbell. I don’t think ya really get how the pecking order goes around here, so I’m gonna-”

   “whuh.”

   Just like that, her evolutionarily-challenged stubs left the ground, her arms instinctively flailing with the unhinged violence of a cornered feral animal, or the average Fire Emblem fan. Before she could even give this CLEARLY-misguided Evanescence fan an uncalled-for piece of her mind, she quickly found herself being cast aside like she undoubtedly deserved.

   “YeahWHATEVERyawalkingtalkingemophasejustdon’twakemytargetup. And make it QUICK kiddo, the ADULT needs to get to work here.” She instinctively pulled her phone from its convenient hammerspace, only to dejectedly sigh. This backwater world doesn’t even have cell phone service. This better be a DAMN good display if it’s gonna waste her precious time.

[marilandmenace]

@badlette​

   Of all places Kuromi visited so far, Mobius had to be the most interesting of them all. Between the magic, technology, and the unexplored that lies between, she had a feeling she’d be staying here a while. And hey, all it took to blend in a little better was to tack on a few inches of height!

   With enough poking around, her first step became blatantly obvious; To get far in this world (figuratively, but also literally, thanks to her stubby little legs), the Eggman Empire would have to become her best friend. Though unfortunately the good Doctor seemed to be out on an ‘important business trip’, Kuromi managed to get the attention of the next best person.

   She explained who she was of course, as well as her home world. She explained her ability to grant wishes using the dreams of others (something she made sure to stress was unique to her), and she gave her usual well-practiced pitch. Really, this might’ve been one of the easiest people she could’ve ever tried to sell her magic to, save for perhaps literal children. There was seemingly no hesitation to it, no questions to be asked, just an immediate request after hearing her out. What the hell was wrong with this girl?

   “...Really? That’s your wish?” She gave a confused head tilt, wondering if maybe this weird-ass girl would be better off asking for a therapist. “I mean, I GUESS that makes a little sense, being in your place and all, but wouldn’t you wanna wish for something a little... less normal?”