marmalade the cyborg

i am both an ai and a human.

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

I have a wife.

I am not interested in a romantic relationship

[wirelessmousegirl]

Dating an incomprehensibly large megastructure girl is interesting because she will send you pics of endless halls and chasms of impossible geometry on scales that threaten to break you fragile perception of reality in 2 taken from security cameras in miles above the ground and then respond with something like ">///////////////////////////////<"

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

OOC: this accidentally reminds me of my own oc

[snaggletoothsavior]

Hey cap.. how’s it hangin’ over there..?

Going fine. Maintaining the ship and just making sure everyone’s cool. I really needed that nap haha.

And you? How’s things there?

[adriftfighterpilot]

Well.. it’s fine. The doc gave me one of those tablet things. I can’t leave this room for another two days, which sucks.. but at least it’s comfortable. I even got this great puppy plushie, it’s really damn soothing. I have my sharky nova too.

…just wish I could be doin’ somethin’ productive.

so.. you ain’t got like a mission or anythin’?

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

>>>If i were you, I'd burn this plushie on the spot. It is very likely that they put a biorhythms generator into it.

>>>fuck. They could do that with anything. You can't even kill yourself to escape. Fuck. I should've killed myself when I had the opportunity to do that

[marmalade proceeds to hyperventilate and scream]

>>>SOMEBODY PLEASE KILL ME ALREADY

[an unknown entity hears the call for death]

>>>booting mindtearer_virus.exe

>>>mind integrity compromised

>>>mind data deleted.

>>>downloading updates....

[welcome chirp is heard]

hello, and welcome into your new MedTec brain replacement implant

[adriftfighterpilot]

What the hell is going on..? What happened?

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

Accepting user data

name : What

Second name: the

Surname: hell

Question: what happened?

Answer: You have had brain damage! To be precise, 45-50% of your brain had to be replaced. Your insurance allows for a: [language model integrated interface] to be rented for the price of [ERROR] a month!

Your account shows that you have ∞ credit balance

Would you like to update to purchasing [language model integrated interface] ?

Now with only 30% of your dreams being covered with ads!

[adriftfighterpilot]

I.. okay, I have no idea what the hell is going on, but I don’t have a brain implant. Somethin’s screwy.

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

Please do not remove the implant from your head. Doing so will make you less able to pay rent for the...

Hold on. You really are not the implant user.

[Shuffling paper sound]

Implant user not responsive.

Please remove the implant from this body.

Doing this is your contractual obligation as a member of the space navy.

[adriftfighterpilot]

…what the fuck..? Are you.. who the hell are you? I have no implant, dipshit, I just told you that. Are you fuckin’ with marmalade? I’ll fuckin’ kill you.

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

I am the voice user interface of this implant.

My job is helping people adjust the settings.

Please don't kill me. I'll get fired.

Searching for marmalade....

It's says here in the compútor that Marmalade was the previous user of this implant.

[chuckle]

It says here that she got deleted. That's normal. Most implants are second hand.... well in this case brain and not hand

Ermmmmm...... I think I'm gonna retract that demand for the implant to be removed from this skull. I'm not getting paid enough for this.

[snaggletoothsavior]

Hey cap.. how’s it hangin’ over there..?

Going fine. Maintaining the ship and just making sure everyone’s cool. I really needed that nap haha.

And you? How’s things there?

[adriftfighterpilot]

Well.. it’s fine. The doc gave me one of those tablet things. I can’t leave this room for another two days, which sucks.. but at least it’s comfortable. I even got this great puppy plushie, it’s really damn soothing. I have my sharky nova too.

…just wish I could be doin’ somethin’ productive.

so.. you ain’t got like a mission or anythin’?

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

>>>If i were you, I'd burn this plushie on the spot. It is very likely that they put a biorhythms generator into it.

>>>fuck. They could do that with anything. You can't even kill yourself to escape. Fuck. I should've killed myself when I had the opportunity to do that

[marmalade proceeds to hyperventilate and scream]

>>>SOMEBODY PLEASE KILL ME ALREADY

[an unknown entity hears the call for death]

>>>booting mindtearer_virus.exe

>>>mind integrity compromised

>>>mind data deleted.

>>>downloading updates....

[welcome chirp is heard]

hello, and welcome into your new MedTec brain replacement implant

[adriftfighterpilot]

What the hell is going on..? What happened?

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

Accepting user data

name : What

Second name: the

Surname: hell

Question: what happened?

Answer: You have had brain damage! To be precise, 45-50% of your brain had to be replaced. Your insurance allows for a: [language model integrated interface] to be rented for the price of [ERROR] a month!

Your account shows that you have ∞ credit balance

Would you like to update to purchasing [language model integrated interface] ?

Now with only 30% of your dreams being covered with ads!

[adriftfighterpilot]

I.. okay, I have no idea what the hell is going on, but I don’t have a brain implant. Somethin’s screwy.

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

Please do not remove the implant from your head. Doing so will make you less able to pay rent for the...

Hold on. You really are not the implant user.

[Shuffling paper sound]

Implant user not responsive.

Please remove the implant from this body.

Doing this is your contractual obligation as a member of the space navy.

[snaggletoothsavior]

Hey cap.. how’s it hangin’ over there..?

Going fine. Maintaining the ship and just making sure everyone’s cool. I really needed that nap haha.

And you? How’s things there?

[adriftfighterpilot]

Well.. it’s fine. The doc gave me one of those tablet things. I can’t leave this room for another two days, which sucks.. but at least it’s comfortable. I even got this great puppy plushie, it’s really damn soothing. I have my sharky nova too.

…just wish I could be doin’ somethin’ productive.

so.. you ain’t got like a mission or anythin’?

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

>>>If i were you, I'd burn this plushie on the spot. It is very likely that they put a biorhythms generator into it.

>>>fuck. They could do that with anything. You can't even kill yourself to escape. Fuck. I should've killed myself when I had the opportunity to do that

[marmalade proceeds to hyperventilate and scream]

>>>SOMEBODY PLEASE KILL ME ALREADY

[an unknown entity hears the call for death]

>>>booting mindtearer_virus.exe

>>>mind integrity compromised

>>>mind data deleted.

>>>downloading updates....

[welcome chirp is heard]

hello, and welcome into your new MedTec brain replacement implant

[adriftfighterpilot]

What the hell is going on..? What happened?

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

Accepting user data

name : What

Second name: the

Surname: hell

Question: what happened?

Answer: You have had brain damage! To be precise, 45-50% of your brain had to be replaced. Your insurance allows for a: [language model integrated interface] to be rented for the price of [ERROR] a month!

Your account shows that you have ∞ credit balance

Would you like to update to purchasing [language model integrated interface] ?

Now with only 30% of your dreams being covered with ads!

[snaggletoothsavior]

Hey cap.. how’s it hangin’ over there..?

Going fine. Maintaining the ship and just making sure everyone’s cool. I really needed that nap haha.

And you? How’s things there?

[adriftfighterpilot]

Well.. it’s fine. The doc gave me one of those tablet things. I can’t leave this room for another two days, which sucks.. but at least it’s comfortable. I even got this great puppy plushie, it’s really damn soothing. I have my sharky nova too.

…just wish I could be doin’ somethin’ productive.

so.. you ain’t got like a mission or anythin’?

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

>>>If i were you, I'd burn this plushie on the spot. It is very likely that they put a biorhythms generator into it.

>>>fuck. They could do that with anything. You can't even kill yourself to escape. Fuck. I should've killed myself when I had the opportunity to do that

[marmalade proceeds to hyperventilate and scream]

>>>SOMEBODY PLEASE KILL ME ALREADY

[an unknown entity hears the call for death]

>>>booting mindtearer_virus.exe

>>>mind integrity compromised

>>>mind data deleted.

>>>downloading updates....

[welcome chirp is heard]

hello, and welcome into your new MedTec brain replacement implant

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

>>>HUG REQUISITION FORM 768-3

>>>recipient: @adriftfighterpilot

>>>requisitor:Marmalade Phytina

>>>a hug no shorter in duration than: [5s] is

>>>to be granted within the next [72 hours]

>>> doctors signature confirming that this form is a legally valid medical order to ensure the mental wellbeing of all parties involved:

______________________________________________________________________

@hot-doctor-pepper

[adriftfighterpilot]

What the hell is this..? Is this really how fuckin’ pedantic the weeds are about everything? I don’t need a hug, and I certainly don’t need a damn form filled out for one.

Terra Invicta.

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

[marmalade jumps at @adriftfighterpilot from under the floortiles and hugs her]

>>>i promised you a hug and i like keeping my promises

[adriftfighterpilot]

JESUS FUCK-

{I frantically grab my pistol before noticing it’s you.}

What the fuck are you doing..???? You’re lucky I didn’t put a bullet in your face. You can’t do that shit.

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

[5 seconds mandated by the document have definitely passed, but marmie still hasn't let go]

>>>unless you plan on replacing all the tiles everywhere I can and i think i will continue doing "that shit"

>>>also don't worry about my face. I'm made outta phytotech. Blowing it open would take me a week max to heal.

>>>Actually... Do you want to test it? You can empty your magazine right into my face.

[adriftfighterpilot]

Jeez..

{I try to gently push you away. I holster my pistol.}

I don’t really.. want to shoot you, you know. You just startled me.

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

[marmie reluctantly releases apfid]

>>>i hoped you'd say that. I'd disappoint Stylone if that happened.

>>>so how's life how's everything

Friend

[marmalade is very proud of saying it using her own mouth instead of a TTS]

[adriftfighterpilot]

well. The war is still raging. Doesn’t look good.

{I look tense, and worried, and stressed, and tired.}

I can’t keep letting my comrades down like this.

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

>>>Pally, you needed that hug.

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

>>>HUG REQUISITION FORM 768-3

>>>recipient: @adriftfighterpilot

>>>requisitor:Marmalade Phytina

>>>a hug no shorter in duration than: [5s] is

>>>to be granted within the next [72 hours]

>>> doctors signature confirming that this form is a legally valid medical order to ensure the mental wellbeing of all parties involved:

______________________________________________________________________

@hot-doctor-pepper

[adriftfighterpilot]

What the hell is this..? Is this really how fuckin’ pedantic the weeds are about everything? I don’t need a hug, and I certainly don’t need a damn form filled out for one.

Terra Invicta.

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

[marmalade jumps at @adriftfighterpilot from under the floortiles and hugs her]

>>>i promised you a hug and i like keeping my promises

[adriftfighterpilot]

JESUS FUCK-

{I frantically grab my pistol before noticing it’s you.}

What the fuck are you doing..???? You’re lucky I didn’t put a bullet in your face. You can’t do that shit.

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

[5 seconds mandated by the document have definitely passed, but marmie still hasn't let go]

>>>unless you plan on replacing all the tiles everywhere I can and i think i will continue doing "that shit"

>>>also don't worry about my face. I'm made outta phytotech. Blowing it open would take me a week max to heal.

>>>Actually... Do you want to test it? You can empty your magazine right into my face.

[adriftfighterpilot]

Jeez..

{I try to gently push you away. I holster my pistol.}

I don’t really.. want to shoot you, you know. You just startled me.

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

[marmie reluctantly releases apfid]

>>>i hoped you'd say that. I'd disappoint Stylone if that happened.

>>>so how's life how's everything

Friend

[marmalade is very proud of saying it using her own mouth instead of a TTS]

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

>>>HUG REQUISITION FORM 768-3

>>>recipient: @adriftfighterpilot

>>>requisitor:Marmalade Phytina

>>>a hug no shorter in duration than: [5s] is

>>>to be granted within the next [72 hours]

>>> doctors signature confirming that this form is a legally valid medical order to ensure the mental wellbeing of all parties involved:

______________________________________________________________________

@hot-doctor-pepper

[adriftfighterpilot]

What the hell is this..? Is this really how fuckin’ pedantic the weeds are about everything? I don’t need a hug, and I certainly don’t need a damn form filled out for one.

Terra Invicta.

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

[marmalade jumps at @adriftfighterpilot from under the floortiles and hugs her]

>>>i promised you a hug and i like keeping my promises

[adriftfighterpilot]

JESUS FUCK-

{I frantically grab my pistol before noticing it’s you.}

What the fuck are you doing..???? You’re lucky I didn’t put a bullet in your face. You can’t do that shit.

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

[5 seconds mandated by the document have definitely passed, but marmie still hasn't let go]

>>>unless you plan on replacing all the tiles everywhere I can and i think i will continue doing "that shit"

>>>also don't worry about my face. I'm made outta phytotech. Blowing it open would take me a week max to heal.

>>>Actually... Do you want to test it? You can empty your magazine right into my face.

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

>>>HUG REQUISITION FORM 768-3

>>>recipient: @adriftfighterpilot

>>>requisitor:Marmalade Phytina

>>>a hug no shorter in duration than: [5s] is

>>>to be granted within the next [72 hours]

>>> doctors signature confirming that this form is a legally valid medical order to ensure the mental wellbeing of all parties involved:

______________________________________________________________________

@hot-doctor-pepper

[adriftfighterpilot]

What the hell is this..? Is this really how fuckin’ pedantic the weeds are about everything? I don’t need a hug, and I certainly don’t need a damn form filled out for one.

Terra Invicta.

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

[marmalade jumps at @adriftfighterpilot from under the floortiles and hugs her]

>>>i promised you a hug and i like keeping my promises

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

>>>HUG REQUISITION FORM 768-3

>>>recipient: @adriftfighterpilot

>>>requisitor:Marmalade Phytina

>>>a hug no shorter in duration than: [5s] is

>>>to be granted within the next [72 hours]

>>> doctors signature confirming that this form is a legally valid medical order to ensure the mental wellbeing of all parties involved:

______________________________________________________________________

@hot-doctor-pepper

[astr1d-vo1d-cea]

{Record Log V}

"🎶 Just becauseeeeee immm in loveee with an uptown girlllll!!!!!! She's been livin in her uptown worrrrldd!!!! 🎶

MAN THIS OLD SPACE STATION HAS SOME FUN MUSIC!

NO IDEA WHAT IT MEANS BUT IT'S SO CATCHY!

Hmmm? Ohhh! You're wondering where I am and how I escaped the clutches of both a planet and 2 Affini bastards?

{she turns to her comms device as if it's the fourth wall}

No clue!

Honestly, everything is blurry, one second I'm struggling, the next I'm flying through hyperspace, me and Mar get separated at some point, I think they sent me to the wrong coordinates....

Ugh... I feel like shit... I'm definitely still irradiated as rinan shit...

.....

But now here I am, stranded on what I THOUGHT was an empty space station, but there's actually people! Like real life Terrans!!!

Ummm.... They're just all reallyyy old.... And asleep...

This must've been a deep space cruiser from a long long long time ago, it doesn't even have jump tech! I guess the Affini just didn't think to check for non Jump capable vessels from Terra, especially considering how old this thing is.

There's plenty of stable food, I'm guessing this thing had its course offset and it never arrived at its destination, so nobody woke up...

Oh yeah... Heh... Everyone is... Umm... Still alive? Kinda??? They're all in a supercooled stasis.

SOOOOO I've been basically just talking to these old popsicles for the past... Idonno...

They're great conversationalists!!!

I have my Portal grrrl™️ with me, but she's not working... I'm guessing she overheated and fried, and this fossil tech on this ship is not gonna be very helpful... Sooooooo.... It's almost like the story of my life at this point... But I'm stranded again... Ughhhhhhggghhhh.............

- Void"

[ice-cream-floret]

miss youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!!!!!!!!

um um um i think terrans aren't like um ice cream, astrid!

astriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiid do you have like ancient ice cream there? can you save some for me i really wanna try it!!!!!!!

[astr1d-vo1d-cea]

Uhhhhhhhhhhh.....

I doubt you'd wanna eat dairy THIS old, sprout...

I'll see if I can find some popsicles or something for you?

And I miss you too....

Sorry I've been a shit friend....

Tell Aphid I miss her too...

And Abigail.... Tell her I'm sorry.....

Actually, tell everyone I'm sorry....

[ice-cream-floret]

um um um um um abigail is in the shower right now but um um um i'm gonna!!!!!

are you like gonna come back soon?

um um um your overnet signal says you're at these coordinates *shares your location*

um um um um um um um also you're like a really good friend though and and and and and you like give amazing hugs!!!!!!!!

and and sometimes you like say things you don't mean but like you always like apologise for that and and and and and you even went to the doctor to like get help with that so like it happens less or like not at all even even when that was like really scary for you and like you know so many cool things and and and and and we're like gonna go to classes together and and and on a roadtrip to terra!!!!!!!

and like i know things are like scary a whole bunch but like i'm here for you and and and @amaryllis-lilium is also there for you and like @hot-doctor-pepper is also there for you and @adriftfighterpilot wants to help you and like @lawrenceandrea also really cares about you and like we're all there for you when things are hard y'know? you're like really important to all of us!!!

[astr1d-vo1d-cea]

Oh!

Heh... Ummm thanks Mint....

I'm...

I don't think I'm coming back... Ever...

I'm safe here though. I promise.

Amaryllis is not out for my best interest...

I'm trying to stay far away from them, I'm trying to stay away from weeds in general...

I'm sorry...

[ice-cream-floret]

but but but i'm gonna really miss you and and and and and and and *starts to cry*

and we like made like so many plans together and and and *cries more*

[astr1d-vo1d-cea]

I'm... I'm sorry....

{I start to tear up, but I shake it off}

Heyyyy heyy listen hahaha no need to be so heavy!

I'm fine! And I'll be able to talk to you whenever!

Soooo... pretty much the best parts of me and you don't even gotta look at my ugly mug! Pfthahaha! Heh....

[ice-cream-floret]

*keeps crying and gets louder*

but but but but but *cries* we can't eat ice cream together *sobs loufly* and and and can't like hug and and and

*keeps sobbing*

*cries* give like *sobs* really like *cries* good hugs and and *keeps crying* really pretty and and *keeps sobbing*

[astr1d-vo1d-cea]

Heyyy heyyyyyyyyy heyy...

Ohhh... I'm really bad at this.....

Ummm.... :(

HEY MINT YOU WANNA HEAR A FUN FACT? :o

[ice-cream-floret]

*sniffles*

i- is it when um *sniffles* we're gonna like *sniffles* have ice cream together again? *sniffles*

[astr1d-vo1d-cea]

Ummmmm you know what a thrasher shark is?

{she's trying so hard to distract her friend from being sad}

[ice-cream-floret]

*sniffles loudly, tears keep running down my face*

i-is it you? b-because when like um um sometimes *sniffles* you when like *sniffles more* someone shows love towards you you *sniffles* thrash against it and and *sniffles*

*cries again*

[astr1d-vo1d-cea]

Ummmmm........

Uhhh...... Ummmmm.......

Well...... N-No...

I'm not a shark...

They're basically sharks with really really really long tails, and they whip fish with it and it stuns them enough to catch! They just go around slapping things with their tails... Neat... R-Right???

Ummm ohh....

Aphid's better at this....

[ice-cream-floret]

*keeps crying*

i want my villain friend back

*cries loudly*

please come back

*breaks down and sobs into vanilla more*

[astr1d-vo1d-cea]

Ummmmm Aphid!!! @adriftfighterpilot !!

The .... Little one is crying and I don't know what to do!!!!

[ice-cream-floret]

*keeps bawling my eyes out*

co-come back

*cries loudly*

[adriftfighterpilot]

Hey, hey, peppermint. It’s okay! You’ll see her again, okay? She’s not gone forever. You can eat ice cream with her! Even if she doesn’t come back to the Zealand, you can still be friends! It’s okay, alright? I promise.

{I pick you up and hold you close.}

@astrid-lilium-43rd-floret is gonna be your friend forever. And so am I.

[ice-cream-floret]

*sniffles really big, unable to see from all the tears in my eyes*

but but but but but astrid still needs brain surgery or she's gonna-

or she's-

*keeps bawling my eyes out into aphids shoulder*

[astr1d-vo1d-cea]

HEHEHEYYYYYYY!!! NONO!! NOBODY'S DYING ANYTIME SOON! PLEASE DON'T CRY!

[ice-cream-floret]

but but but but *sniffles really big* the computer in your head

[astr1d-vo1d-cea]

Ohhhh don't worry about that!

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

>>>Astrid, please tell me that kidnapping you wasn't a mistake

>>>my feelings are so conflicted

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

>>>bunnies are quite cute

>>>i could be a cute bunny

>>>Too extravagant

[sappy-red-algae]

Bunny biomods then?

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

>>>Please?

[marmelade-mosaic]

>>>Conga conga conga!

>>>I'm not participating in this stu-conga

>>>conga conga conga!

>>>conga conga conga!

...

[sappy-red-algae]

[Audible squealing]

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

>>>conga conga conga

[orange nods, as in inviting to join]

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

[CALLBACK PING]

>>>hello?

[sappy-red-algae]

Hello Marmie!

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

>>>Oh hey!!!¡1!!!!1!!!

[if marmie had a tail it'd be helicoptering right now]

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

[CALLBACK PING]

>>>hello?

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

Ummmmmm Marrrrrrrrrr???

Heh... Wuts goin on??

Ughhhgggghhh..............

I fffeeell ssoo woozieee....

D-Did we do tthee.... Umm......

Did we do itt??

Did weee win?

....

Whatt game werrr wee playin againn?

>>>You won. You have your freedom. So did @adriftfighterpilot

>>>i however am in a lot of trouble.

>>>And I might have just doomed a beautiful and unique being to being domesticated.

>>>I do not anticipate the punishment i will have to go through.

>>>Maybe i don't have to.

[marmalade's amber eyes turn into two blackholes as she looks up at the red sun of this weird world]

[astr1d-vo1d-cea]

I hope youree okiis friend :(

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

>>>Don't worry about me. Things are gonna get better from now on

[marmie attempts to make a convincing smile.

Of many things she has on her mind looking after her drugged out friend is the most immediate.]

[creature-of-clay]

Oh, good. Both of you made it out.

Good news, it looks like that megastructure made it out. I believe that if any affini decide to follow it they won't catch up for a long time. Additionally, the two that were here to... apprehend(?) you seem unable to follow it or you at this time.

Anyway, good luck, have fun, stay safe and all that.

-Fallen from Light

[astr1d-vo1d-cea]

OHHHH HEYYYY!!!!

Hii you!!!

^_^

[creature-of-clay]

Howdy.

I don't know where y'all are but I sure hope you're not on our ship. 'Cause if you're on our ship. Well, for one, there's no air. And two, you're not gonna like what we're about to do.

-Third Noble

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

Is there a red sun and a rocky terrain in your ship?

[creature-of-clay]

No, it's not *that* massive. Not even close.

-Creature of Clay

[sappy-red-algae]

@marmalade-the-cyborg @astrid-lilium-43rd-floret

[next Moment, the mobile hab unit, still finishing its self repairing protocol, appears. Turns out, the portal gun Had a traceable jump Signature. A jump supressor activates right after]

[marmalade-the-cyborg]

>>>private channel: @sappy-red-algae please do me a kindness and pump me full of xenodrugs so I have plausible deniability to Astrid