Game of Thrones Daily
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JBB: An Artblog!
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we're not kids anymore.
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AnasAbdin
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@massageconfessions
Client: I've had pain in my neck since I was eight.
Me: Oh no! Did you have an injury?
C: Not that I know of ... My uncle used to pick me up by my head and swing me around.
M: ... Was this before or after the pain started?
C: Before
Me:
I have covid. One of my massage clients gave me covid 🙃
So, like... I know all massage therapists are different, but when a client requests a therapist change in the mIDDLE OF A COUPLES MASSAGE, it's a big blow to the self esteem...
Look, I know that it's summer (in the northern hemisphere). I know people are going out and having fun in the sun. But please, for the love of all that is good, do NOT get a massage if you're sunburned or peeling. The sloughed off skin mixes with the lotion and turns into gross, grey little blobs.
Please, for the love of all that is good in the world, don’t wear perfume or perfumed lotions to your massage.
It’s been over ten hours and I’m still breathing it.
I think people who bathe in cologne are worse than those who don't bathe at all. Be considerate.
I started school on the 3rd of March. Already loving it and I have great instructors! The work is tough but well worth it! Just yesterday, I was able to use what I learned in my Human Anatomy & Physiology along with Kinesiology class to pin-point a stressed muscle for my Pops. The look on his face when I told him that it wasn’t coming from where he thought but really from this muscle while lightly applying pressure and guiding his arm so he could feel the stress had me feel like, wow. I’m really going to help people especially my loved ones. It’s a great feeling and I’m so happy I took the first step!
MC: That’s so awesome! Stuff like that is what makes it all worth it. Best of luck in school
Me: I just killed myself massaging this dude, if he doesn't leave a good tip I'll be pissed.
Coworker: You're supposed to do this for the good of humanity
Me: Humanity should learn to tip its therapists
I hate massaging abs. Hate, hate, HATE! Even if the client’s properly draped and tucked, it’s still too close to their junk for comfort. It freaks me out and I try to avoid it whenever I can, which isn’t always an option.
See I don’t care. I have to get abdominal massage sometimes myself. Like my diaphragm was spasming last week and I had to get abdominal massage this week when I got my massage to make sure it stops happening. I don’t mind doing abdominal work, the thing that FREAKS me out is when I come into the room and the dude has it draped all the way down to his groin, like you can almost see hair peeking out from the sheets. I just grab that sheet and pull it up to his hips. And if he pushes it back I keep doing it till he gets the message or say something to him. This is a massage, not your fun time.
Ew, yeah, that’s gross. Thankfully, that’s only happened to me once. But it was on a dude where I wasn’t even massaging his abs!
One of my pet peeves massaging people is if they’re nigh unresponsive.
“How’s the pressure?” *non-committal grunt* “Is the hot towel okay?” *non-committal grunt*
What’s WORSE is when someone brings in headphones and they cannot hear anything. Part of a good massage is communicating with your therapist. That can’t happen if YOU CAN’T EVEN HEAR THEM.
I hate massaging abs. Hate, hate, HATE! Even if the client's properly draped and tucked, it's still too close to their junk for comfort. It freaks me out and I try to avoid it whenever I can, which isn't always an option.
This was so weird.
It’s called the IPalm hand massager. Nothing beats the human touch, but if your hands are tired and you can’t get someone to massage them… I guess it’s a good alternative?
thesabbit replied to your post “Sometimes when talking to a client, it takes everything you have to...”
People will confide weeeeiiiird shit in their mt
They really latch onto the “therapist” aspect of massage therapist.
I’ve had some clients tell me their massage was more effective than their therapy sessions. Though I’d much prefer those sessions over anti-evolution guy.
Sometimes when talking to a client, it takes everything you have to not laugh or roll your eyes so hard they fall out.
A few days ago, I was massaging a conspiracy theorist who didn’t believe evolution was real. He started talking about his plants and how pests suddenly showed up (his plants were OUTSIDE), and then watching a caterpillar make its chrysalis. “That’s why I think evolution is fake,” he said. “How did the pests know to come for my plants? And the butterfly…”
Another of his reasons? There’s too much variety of life on our tiny planet for evolution to make sense.
He also didn’t believe ancient people could have made the pyramids and other wonders, but doesn’t think it was aliens either because he didn't believe in them.
I’m Ashley… I’m twenty-seven and from the Atlanta area.. I start school to become a MT in one week :)
MC: Nice! Good luck with school. :D
It’s been almost four weeks since this happened and I’m still pissed about it, so I’m posting it here.
I was massaging a regular of mine, one of those that smells like he bathed in cologne before showing up. He always falls asleep even though it’s just shy of being a deep tissue. I don’t understand how people fall asleep during deep tissue massages but oh, well.
After the massage was over, before I leave the room, I notice there’s a literal puddle of drool on the floor under his head. “No big deal,” I think. “It’s kinda disgusting but I’ll clean it up after he leaves.”
He gets out of the room, thanks me, and goes on his merry way. I go into the room to change the table and am pleasantly surprised to see the puddle is no longer there! “Oh wow, that was considerate of him,” I think... blissfully unaware of what the fucker used to clean up the mess.
While changing the table, my hand falls on the blanket... which has a large wet spot.
The fucker used the fucking blanket to clean up his drool. Who the fuck does that?! THERE WAS A BOX OF KLEENEX RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIS FACE. AND THEN HE PUT THE BLANKET BACK ON THE TABLE.
How ya gonna show up thirty minutes late for an hour massage and then get mad at US for not being able to give you the full time?!
Not your fault that’s for damn sure. Just get em on the table. No u can’t have more time we have other clients after you. You fucked up and could have called.
The clinic called five minutes after the start time and he said he'd be ten minutes late. Twenty-five minutes later, he rolls in.
I hate waiting for clients, it makes me antsy.
