Master chief (master)bates too much

[anchovy]

My mom told me to stop vapeing in the house and my dad just texted me this

[anchovy]

Update:

[master-chiefs-right-hand]

I love your father

[i-am-a-snom]

cc - )___\ Yes, I am here.

cc =")___\ Barely..

cc=" )___\ Sometimes I almost wish I wasn't an ice type.

[master-chiefs-right-hand]

Don't worry Snom :)

[ratguzzler-deactivated20181213]

i wanted to see how many filters i could use on dr phil before it would atop recognizing it as a face so here it is

[ratguzzler-deactivated20181213]

boat captain who fishes for human skin

[master-chiefs-right-hand]

Dr. Heroin

[catchymemes]

[master-chiefs-right-hand]

Cargo pants

[coughloop]

I have a hot date with a beautiful gas leak seeping up from the basement ina few minutes, just gotta light some candles to set the mood !

[master-chiefs-right-hand]

Remember to close the door when things start heating up

[radiofreederry]

[raptorofwar]

[master-chiefs-right-hand]

no

[master-chiefs-right-hand]

Whenever my head gets x-rayed, there's no brain. It's just a diagram of the most simplest circuit you can think of. It looks like this.

[wordfather]

shoutout to the guy who created a parody account of cinemasins where instead of pointing out every single flaw in a film, he just pointed out things he liked about the movie. you're so right cinemawins its so much more fun to like things

[lastoneout]

CinemaWins once said "Every movie, with very little exception, is someone's favorite, I like to find out why." and that sentence alone is worth more than every single thing the CinemaSins guys have ever created.

[master-chiefs-right-hand]

And then there's the fucker who points out mistakes in the CinemaSins videos, he goes by CinemaSinsSins.

[geslotencirkel]

When i delete a post it goes back inside me

[nemesismess]

why do people like boobs anyways??

[nemesismess]

[nemesismess]

[bungerc0re]

@damicantcope relevant

[public-universal-sister]

You can’t spell silly without ill, and baby? I’m diseased.

[master-chiefs-right-hand]

Sibabylly

[pukicho]

I can just lie now and force tumblr to sponsor me

[lmk-vibes]

Poggers?

[master-chiefs-right-hand]

Definitely poggers

[master-chiefs-right-hand]

Whenever I drive to work or school I take the highway. So right now it's under construction for getting widened. Now first they had to remove all the trees/plants. So there is this one excavator with a saw on the end with a big clamp, and for some reason whenever I see it I get the insurmountable urge to go into Blender and just modeling construction equipment.

[infinittywar]

them: Hey. Are you even listening to me?

my head: rockin, rockin’, and rollin’. down to the beach, i’m strollin’ but the seagulls poke at my head: not fun! i said “seagulls mmm! stop it now!”  hmm hah hmm hmm hmm hah hmm hmm ha, hmm hmm hmm hm ha hmm hm hm hm hah

[kallistoi]

[image description: a gif of yoda walking around his house]

[detrout]

everyone told me not to stroll on the beach

[master-chiefs-right-hand]

said seagulls gonna cum

[rottingfacade]

When my uncle was younger his hobby was going to car dealerships to negotiate prices on the cars. He never actually bought any, he would just argue with the salesmen about prices then leave

[master-chiefs-right-hand]

I wanna meet ypur uncle

[thememedaddy]

[master-chiefs-right-hand]

😶

[thelostswede]

[blueartistic813]

TONIGHT

[lakeffectqueer-deactivated20240]

TONIGHT

[scretladyspider]

Tonight!!!

[ladyvesuvia]

TONIGHT

[fandom]

T O N I G H T !

[master-chiefs-right-hand]

!!!TONIGHT!!!