Δ jo wilson Δ

I still feel his touch against my skin, for past love lingers like phantom limbs.

[mctinkerbell-blog]

hisfiight:

     “alright, you need to chill. you’re not the only one in the world who’s been through things. in fact, i guarantee you that i can list about five people off the top of my head who probably have it harder than you. so why don’t you get off your high horse, princess, and get back to work.”

        it was a worn but brutal rage that drew her words now, and jo hardly knew where the roots of her anger began.  " great. fine. make it a competition of fucked-up lives. congratulations, you win! but don’t you dare sit there and call me ‘ princess ’ when you’ve barely looked at me before today. “ 

[mctinkerbell-blog]

jackscnavxry:

“i am coping. i’ve been cleared for surgery. i’m perfectly fine. have you been cleared?”

“ cleared — ? you mean people have been cleared already? I mean, i’m sure they’ll get to the interns eventually... “

[mctinkerbell-blog]

mctwicty:

            ‘ — – -That has NOTHING to do with your            rounds. So it has no place here…what’s the            update on the PATIENT ?? ‘

     “ i guess we’re not acknowledging what happened here, then. shall we ignore the fact that someone got shot and killed here instead? honestly, what is it with this place and its obsession with appearing normal? guess what  — nothing’s freaking normal around here anymore! “

[mctinkerbell-blog]

adulterousbitch:

     “Dr. Wilson—-there is a difference between denial and appropriate emotional distance. A good doctor knows how to avoid becoming so invested that their judgement is clouded when they’re on the job. That’s how patients die. If you want good outcomes–if you want to survive in this program–I suggest you start learning that.”

    “ survive in this program? what about surviving in life? no one comes to work in a hospital expecting to have to actually, literally, fend for their lives. jesus — i came here to be safe, and all seattle’s done for me is make me afraid again. and don’t tell me you’re not afraid, because i’ve had enough of being lied to, too. “

[mctinkerbell-blog]

jackscnavxry:

“find better ways to cope with what life throws at you. that’s an idea.”

“ and you’re supposed to be a fine example of coping? god, everyone around here’s a hypocrite. “

[mctinkerbell-blog]

aprilkcpncr:

       “sometimes you don’t always know immediately.  but you get up and do your job every day regardless of what you do or don’t know.  unless you want to do scut forever.”

        “ so what have you learned from this? please let me know what i’m not seeing here, because i seem to be the only one having trouble ‘ getting up and doing my job ’ after some psychopath shot up this place. “

[mctinkerbell-blog]

adulterousbitch:

     “I came back to Seattle. That, I don’t hate. The fact that I just so happened to come back the day of what can only be described as the unspeakable act of a deranged, grief-stricken man is just an unfortunate coincidence. Like I said. I have a job to do, Wilson. So, I’m doing it. 

—-If you’re not interested in doing the same, I suggest you pack your things and go. Otherwise, get back to work.”

      “ this is great — just one more for the long list of people in this hospital who refuse to acknowledge what happened. what if i can’t just leave my heart in my locker at the start of shift and pick it up at the end? is it better this way for you, just pretending? “

[mctinkerbell-blog]

hisfiight:

    “maybe you’re the problem.”

         “ okay, first of all, you don’t know me — who the hell are you to say that i’m the problem? you don’t know what i’ve been through and what i’ve dealt with, so you damn well don’t deserve to come up in my business and judge. “

[mctinkerbell-blog]

jackscnavxry:

“doesn’t seem like a very healthy thing to be doing.”

“ well, i seem to be out of alternatives, aren’t i? “

[vrkichandra-blog]

     “The place smells like wet paint and plaster, the coffee is worse than I remember, the harbor is full of people with umbrellas who have no sense of direction or personal space, and it’s raining. So, no. No, this is not a good morning, but I have a job to do, so here I am.”

[mctinkerbell-blog]

      “ why’d you come back if you hate it so much? i’d be running like hell away from here if i could. “

[mctinkerbell-blog]

“ running from one disaster to another seems to be my thing. “

[cubxndoc-deactivated20180830]

“I thought I’d left the humidity in Florida, but apparently I was wrong. At least Seattle doesn’t have hurricanes, but rumor has it that Seattle’s on their own level of tragedy?”

[mctinkerbell-blog]

“ mass shootings are more of the norm here these days, didn’t you know? “ 

[mctinkerbell-blog]

aprilkcpncr:

“tragedy happens everywhere,  wilson.  the best thing you can do is learn and move on.”

      “ what the hell am I supposed to have learned from this? tell me what i could possibly have learned from watching good people die for no reason, because i just don’t see it. “

[mctinkerbell-blog]

the gun in her hand felt vulgar — evil, even. the events of the past few days had worn into her like stitches she could never shed, and for the first time jo truly understood what harm such a weapon could exact.

tonight, she’d been ready to rid herself of its violence. but as she stared down the black gunmetal, jo realized she was scared — so deeply and so crudely that it petrified her. as heart and mind beat against her, jo whispered: 

“ i can’t do it. i don’t think i could sleep at night without knowing i had a way to protect myself.                                                               ....does that make me a terrible person? “

[calliextcrres]

    “ it’s weird — being back here, seeing everything looking so NORMAL — except it’s not normal, it’ll never be normal again —” Callie uttered, not quite able to shake the images still burned in the back of her mind. 

           “ it just — it feels different, don’t you think? –”

[mctinkerbell-blog]

       different was an understatement. different was a word that could only hold a turn of the seasons; a shift in the wind — not the abject grief and horror that had infiltrated this place. and for a moment, jo was silenced by the surrealism of all that surrounded her. 

    “ but it’s so much more than different. i can’t explain it, but it feels like we’ll never be normal again.

[mclexipcdia-blog]

“ I’m fine, okay ??  You don’t – I don’t need you to tiptoe around me like I’m so fragile little girl who’s about to break down again. I’m not. And I won’t. “

[mctinkerbell-blog]

“ if you’re as  fine  as you say you are, why are you surrounded by fifty pastry wrappers? someone’s going to have to clean that up — seriously, girl, are you okay? “

[hisfiight]

        “— did you know that Robbins brings the best donuts? Ten bucks and I’ll tell you where her secret stash is.”

[mctinkerbell-blog]

         “ for ten bucks, I could just as easily get a boxful from the café down the street. and stealing from your attending — really?”