indugle thyself

[meisele]

no one will see this but I can't help but shout into an unceasing void while the world goes to hell

[mapswithoutwyoming]

legend tells of a mysterious being called “nuance” that allows multiple things to be true at the same time. some say you can still hear its voice whispering in the trees

[meisele]

Sanguinis Memoria II

“He found him in a desert land, and in the howling waste of the wilderness; he encircled him, he cared for him, he kept him the apple of his eye.” Deuteronomy 32:10  The sun had started to set a little too late. Maybe that was my sign to stay put just one more night in this cave. Omen had finally found a spot to get comfortable during the day while we slept. So had I. I crawled closer to the…

Sanguinis Memoria II

[alwaysbeenjessica]

ray bradbury

[wincist]

honestly, especially in the current state of the world, you all have GOT to kill whatever puritanical voice inside your head keeps insisting that if something is erotic it has no social, artistic, or intellectual merit.

stop acting as if someone can’t enjoy both erotica and literary fiction or classics. it’s not some dichotomy.

stop acting as if erotic art can’t be poignant and meaningful. and that includes all erotic art - not just fine art.

stop insisting that sex scenes or erotic material ruin movies and shows just because you, personally, get icked out watching it.

no, not all erotic art is high art, and not all erotic art is meant to invoke deep intellectual discussion - but insisting that makes erotic art valueless, a disservice to intellectualism, or whatever else - does nothing but add fuel to a fire built on conservative ideology.

[meisele]

ISO: security

I graduated college in 2020. It took too long for me to get that degree, but I got it. There were so many times that I was told to set aside my dreams of being a writer and focus on creating a base that would give me the security to do that whenever I wanted. And lord did I not give a fuck. I got a degree in something that I was interested in, with a hairpin dream of moving forward with it, and I…

[meisele]

Sanguinis Memoria

Hebrews 11:38 “Of whom the world was not worthy—wandering about in deserts and mountains, and in dens and caves of the earth.”  It was cold, even for being this deep into the mountains. The skin on my knuckles cracked every time I flexed my fingers around the reigns in my hand and I could feel the chill settling into my bones. This particular trip had taken me through the sierra nevadas and…

Sanguinis Memoria

[meisele]

thus spake the axe

Or, death to the thought daughter If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound? I feel like this is one of those old little sayings that I have actually gotten into many a heated discussion about over the years. My answer has stayed the same, drunk or sober: of course it fucking does. We do not deny the roar of a bear or babbling of a creek without a human…

[meisele]

the beginning is always magical

I have never really liked new years as a holiday in the wintertime. I have never understood why you would want to start fresh a year whilst dealing with the cold, and snow, and ice. How on earth does it make sense to begin anew when the earth is still in hibernation mode? We should be allowed to take the last few weeks of december off for various religious holidays for certain, but beginning a…

[meisele]

spring rain smells like life change

The problem with being a cradle catholic is no matter how many times you denounce the catholic church, no matter how far you stray from the golden hue of the vatican’s theological grip, no matter what you even personally believe now, being baptised in the church means that you are eternally a catholic (according to the theology). You can be a fully practicing jedi knight and the church will still…

[meisele]

self indulgent writings in a time of rot

The sun came out in defiance of that little groundhog a few times last week. I have a small sunburn all over from sitting out in its glorious rays, basking like the little lizard I am. I’m sure I’ll pay for these and other stolen moments with the sun in my old age, but for now I will always tip my face towards that which makes me feel alive again. While enjoying this warm moment in the dead of…

[meisele]

vul*ner*a*bil*i*ty

David Lynch died on January 15, 2025. There are a myriad of places on the internet where you can find the timeline of his life, his deeply important work, and why you should actually give a shit about a man like that leaving this earth. So many people have already waxed poetic about who he was as an artist and his lasting impact on filmmaking. I’m just going to pile onto that…

[meisele]

i think about cycles too often

“The Life/Death/Life nature is a cycle of animation, development, decline, and death that is always followed by reanimation. This cycle affects all physical life and all facets of psychological life. Everything – the sun, novas, and the moon, as well as the affairs of humans and tiniest creatures, cells and atoms alike – have this fluttering, then faltering, then fluttering again.” – Dr. Clarissa…

[meisele]

self indulgent word vomit

Every time I have sat down to write anything in the last month and a half, I find myself doing that thing where I start and stop, then I work on an unrelated project and daydream until I find that somehow an astounding amount of time has passed and I still have responsibilities to take care of.  It seems that much of creation – be it content or art or the self – is the constant stopping and…

[3y3]

Memento Mori, Welder Wings

[meisele]

trying is terrifying

Stagnacy seems to do nothing for me however, so I am choosing to be terrified. I have this issue with being perceived in a way that’s not true to who I am, which is why the last thing of mine that was properly published is a small article in a college paper from at least four lives ago. I have started this particular piece and stopped it and deleted it and recreated it so many times over the last…

[meisele]

"right time" is a cop out

I’ve been thinking a lot recently about the idea of doing things at the “right time”. I think, had I continued to wait around for the correct time to try and start writing seriously, I would have been waiting until I was falling apart in a wheelchair somewhere. Or, it would be twenty years down the road and I would have dedicated my life to some other career, miserable, wishing I had just taken…