I wrote some character analysis of Cole last night and thought I'd share :) below the cut 🔽
Cole is someone who's grown up to be the one who loses. He actively chases it. He can't be a leader not because he's incapable because that'd mean there won't be anyone above him punishing him. He's learned to live through everything by humiliating himself, acting like a fool, like he can't tell penny from dime long enough until the ones looming ahead with blades meant for his head are gone.
He survives and he hates it. He's good at he does and he wish he weren't because he's the horrendous murderer he is now because of how good aim with that six shooter of his, or how easily he can charm people into believing whatever bullshit he masterfully weaves and sells as reality.
He should've died, shouldn't have been born, shouldn't have survived those dozen hundred times he nearly missed death but he's too damn good at being this monster that beats people in the game of survival. His hands aim for their own and he's not sure how to not do that anymore. Just point at the space between their eyes and pull the trigger and wonder when you even commanded your arm to do this. Just shoot and add the burden of murder to the pit of other hundreds of people and their futures you marked futile. He doesn't know how to not make his arms not do what they're best at. He doesn't know what he is besides this, besides half-truths and a shaky will to live. Besides the unsureness of what he'll be doing today when he wakes up that gives its place to simply accepting anything.
So what if I go on that mission? My arms will let me survive. So what if I make that decision? I'm always so neatly placed on the line between truth and lie that it won't matter afterall. So what if this and that happens to me? I haven't been the one living this life anyway. It's always my trigger finger making me survive the fights and my thousand made up selves saving the aftermath.
Cole isn't living his own life. He's watching it from afar. He's as surprised as the other person when anything happens in his life. He's lived a lie, a disgrace, a life that shouldn't have been created. He's lived them for so long he doesn't care anymore.
He remembers a time when he was a teen and tried to fix his wrongdoings. He remembers a time when he cried after taking a life. He remembers a time when he, too, seeked redemption. He remembers a time when he was human enough to care.
He sees Hanzo burning with what he felt when he first shot a man in the heart and saw him die. He sees him drowning in boiling hot regret. And he knows best that regret is nothing but a sad understanding that you could do better than what you did. He sees him bury himself in what he felt in the innocence of his youth, a beg for forgiveness. A cry to the universe or whatever is up above that they care. He sees that and immediately softens. He's a man stern as a rock with the innocence of a kid at 13 when he first had to shoot a man. He cares.
He's not stupid though, they're both sinners. But he knows that if there's 7 hells, and if they go both to one for all they did, he belongs the deepest depths for not caring what he does anymore. And hanzo? He cares.
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