I once was on orgasm denial for 16 months. At around the year mark there were a few instances where i tried to give in and orgasm but i found I couldn't force myself over the edge for whatever reason. If you were given permission from your Master do you think you could let yourself actually orgasm or would something hold you back? If you think your were forced to cum, could you hold back as long as necessary? (sorry for the long question)
Given permission, no. Given the verbal command to, yes. There’s a difference in those two things for me. Permission is often given as a reward and in this moment i’ve done nothing to deserve a gift of that caliber. Commands indicate His wants and those are my primary focus.
As cliche as it sounds, He’s worked incredibly hard to teach me to mentally control orgasm. Prior to being placed in denial i was physically unable to cum unless He commanded it. Many of my behaviors have become attached to a single word command, much like one does with the family dog. So could i were forced to cum i would hold it back until He said the word.
The body is ultimately the mind’s puppet. Control the mind and the body will follow.
-slave
