if anyone here's a buffy the vamp.ire slayer fan, i have an rp blog over at @libraryrippcr. ill probably be around there a lot more.
One Nice Bug Per Day
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shark vs the universe
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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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occasionally subtle

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@messiahrisen
if anyone here's a buffy the vamp.ire slayer fan, i have an rp blog over at @libraryrippcr. ill probably be around there a lot more.
@messiahrisen sent 02. — kiss (because why not) - One Word Writing Prompts - Accepting!
This always does seem to happen, doesn't it? Even now. In a world gone to shit. With his mind gone to shit. People. Friends. Taking an interest. Trying to spin this into something more. Though it does surprise him that this time, it's coming from this guy.
Don't get him wrong. Murphy's been giving off the vibes just fine. Pretty much the second they crossed paths. The way he carries himself. The way he looks at not just the women in his compound, but the men as well. With Wesson pretty high on that list and beyond eager to stay there.
But still, it does come out of nowhere and at first, it's the surprise mostly, which makes him back off, deny it. What follows quickly after is the skepticism. Distrust. Most certainly all that paranoia still. Keeping him even further away.
"The hell do you think you're doing?" he asks, outright. Eyes narrowing.
Murphy freezes. What IS he doing?
That's a good fucking question.
"I. Um." He blinks hard, as if in answer to Lance's question. "I was, well. You had something --"
Murphy flinches. He looks down, rubbing the back of his neck, as if the FLOOR will have the answers he's looking for. Human connection is not his strong suit -- nor is it something he's had much of in a long, long time. He was, admittedly, thinking of SOMEBODY ELSE when he kissed Lance, as if that's any fair to either of them.
"Haven't you heard? It's how people say hello nowadays."
The lie feels about as STUPID as he is, but it's the best he can think of.
"I guess I missed you? Sue me."
I've been a selfish prick my whole life, but then my little girl was born and suddenly, I wanted something for someone else. By the time I figured that out it was too late. Now my little girl is gone.
drabble away for 24. — agony!!!!!!
AGONY.
Murphy knows agony. He knows what it means to be eviscerated, to be ripped into pieces while he's helpless to defend even the smallest part of himself from the pain. He knows what its like to be HELPLESS, fearful, and small -- to know nothing but a world of hurt and misery and nothing else. Murphy knows how to shut himself away from it all. He's had to learn the hard way.
But the pain of being eaten alive is nothing compared to the agony of losing LUCY, his daughter, his reason for growing and living and seeing the light of day.
That's an AGONY, physical and mental, that will trap him inside himself forever.
One Word Writing Prompts
Send me a number 1 thru 50 for a word that I’ll use to write either a headcanon, drabble, or starter. Send 🌀 for a random number instead.
01. — first 02. — kiss 03. — final 04. — numb 05. — broken 06. — wings 07. — melody 08. — rules 09. — chocolate 10. — nostalgia 11. — heartbeat 12. — stranger 13. — confusion 14. — bitter 15. — afterlife 16. — daybreak 17. — audience 18. — endless 19. — fireworks 20. — wishing 21. — birthday 22. — tomorrow 23. — oppression 24. — agony 25. — return 26. — protection 27. — boxes 28. — hope 29. — preparation 30. — beautiful 31. — lies 32. — underneath 33. — hide 34. — diary 35. — unforeseen 36. — conditional 37. — gone 38. — clear 39. — heartache 40. — wired 41. — insanity 42. — foolish 43. — words 44. — study 45. — love 46. — skies 47. — stars 48. — lucky 49. — shake 50. — punctual
@demcnsinmymind // sc !
Murphy screeches like a goddamn harpy during mating season. There's too many of them -- too many that he can't control. He stretches his arms out, trying to push back against the horde that never seems to want to stop. Backtracking, he stumbles around the corner of the street, seeking out shelter as he pikes a zombie through the head, killing it instantly. It does jack SHIT against the dozens more coming for his brains down the street.
Finding Lance is the last thing he expected to do today. He nearly topples right over when he spots the man in the corner, fending off the horde on his own. Murphy grabs him by the back of the shirt and YANKS him to his feet, sprinting down the road to shelter.
"Lovely seeing you here!" he snaps breathlessly. "I can't hold them back. We need to fricken MOVE."
I've been super dead and gone for years, but I would like to try and be active on Murphy again. If anyone's out there, consider this a legit starter call!
Murphy sinks to the ground, feeling DEFEATED. He casts a long look at Brian, wonders what this guy must be smoking to actually want to follow him this far, and slumps his shoulders.
"It's just...it's freaking useless," he mutters. He stares out at the great abyss, shaking his head. "There's no point. I couldn't be there for her. She's gonna just...HATE me."
The self-pity trip isn't going to take him very far. If Roberta were here, she'd slap some sense right into him without hesitation. Maybe that's exactly what Murphy needs.
there's a lot of things that brian is an asshole about, but this? this isn't one of those. this comes as near and dear to his heart as it can be, and he won't leave murphy hanging. additionally, while he loves warren and the others, he has always felt more drawn towards murphy, if not just for their matching chaotic temperaments.
no judgement here, no scrutiny. lips purse in thought, and he moves to sit on the edge of the cliff; his gun hangs by the strap from his shoulder, resting in the grass. " i don't think she hates you, why would she? she might hate you if you don't try to find 'er. " but he feels like he needs to say more, he needs to.. give. something to help murphy relate, to help him understand. " i had a son.. shit got kind of crazy towards the beginnin' and.. shit just happened. but if i just lost 'im, i'd do anythin' to find 'im. "
Murphy gives him a long look, a stare that lingers between them as he heaves a quiet sigh. "You? You had a SON?" he repeats. He scoffs and looks away. "What is this, mutual therapy? Parental bonding?" Something twists in his chest as he tries not to think about what it would mean to lose a child. To lose his Lucy for good. The thought makes him physically nauseous.
"You don't strike me as a FATHER," he huffs. "No offense."
Z Nation (2014-2018) Season Two | Episode Three
i saw some z nation posts and it just reminded me (not the content of the posts but just In General) about all my feelings about Alvin Murphy
because. god. Z Nation had a ton of character development all around, but Murphy was. I mean he had shifts, he had his moments of change, but when it came down to the very end he still had those core traits of absolute coward and someone who was absolutely out to help himself first and foremost.
Even to the very end -- it's implied he now has the building blocks for an actual cure, a way to turn zombies (feral and talker alike) human again, a way to bring people back, and his reaction is the epitome of a guy working out exactly how he can angle this to benefit him the most. And I adore that, I love characters that don't necessarily get better as they grow, it makes so much sense for someone who has seen every system he's been involved with (willingly or not) either go up in flames or completely screw him over or both. It makes sense that he runs at the first sign of real danger, even when the fear of zombies has all but gone, it still makes sense to run and look after himself because almost no one else ever has.
But the very few exceptions to this rule. Are almost entirely because of Warren.
(and this is all not counting Lucy because obvs she was an exception to literally everything but also. wasn't around a very long time to be an exception.)
Warren is the only one he'll actually walk into danger for (even if he complains about it the whole time) and possibly, possibly, risk his life for. The rest of operation bitemark might be considered for something like that, Doc especially (he'd sell 10k to satan for one corn chip and the feeling is mutual), but. He listens to Warren. He respects Warren, which is more than can be said for like the vast majority of what's left of humanity.
One could even say he loves Warren. Whether he even knows what sort of love that is is up for debate, but I'd definitely say it's mutual in their very strange very...unbalanced way. Warren knows the lengths Murphy would go to to help her, knows what that means for him, and they acknowledge it to each other with that little nose tap and then never bring it up again and they make me insane.
It's might not be romantic but it's probably one of if not the only relationship that truly matters to him by the end of everything.
Alvin Murphy was a coward at the start and a coward at the end but he also can, will, and has put himself in front of a bullet for Roberta Warren.
@noblehigh // starter !
Murphy stands on the edge of the cliff, peering down with narrow eyes. He's exhausted, and at this point, the search for his daughter is only feeling more HELPLESS than usual. He's tired. Beyond tired. Tired of not being able to settle down. Tired of not having his family together in one place. He's just...he's fucking sick of it. He's been sick of it for a long time, ever since Murphytown ended up being one, great bust.
"So --" he starts. "You coming with me or what?"
Brian's the only person who didn't kick his ass right to the curb when he left Murphytown behind.
sometimes he wonders if it's foolish of him to follow murphy. if everyone else stayed behind, shouldn't he take that as a sign? but he's never been one to follow the crowd, and he's always actually liked murphy-- for the most part. more than all of that, he can sympathize; there was a point in time he had a son, and he would have crossed a million earths to find him ( and he hopes that someone would have helped him, too ).
he joins him at the cliff, arms moving to cross over his chest. " ain't it obvious? " gaze turns from the beautiful view to the man next to him, and he shrugs, " i'm with you, man. we gotta find your girl, yeah? "
Murphy sinks to the ground, feeling DEFEATED. He casts a long look at Brian, wonders what this guy must be smoking to actually want to follow him this far, and slumps his shoulders.
"It's just...it's freaking useless," he mutters. He stares out at the great abyss, shaking his head. "There's no point. I couldn't be there for her. She's gonna just...HATE me."
The self-pity trip isn't going to take him very far. If Roberta were here, she'd slap some sense right into him without hesitation. Maybe that's exactly what Murphy needs.
Noticing Trauma sentence starters
Feel free to alter dialogue to suit your muse!
“That really spooked you.”
“I don’t want to pry, but.. I want you to know I also want to listen, if you want someone to talk to.”
“Well, pretend I’m not here. What would you say if nobody could hear it?”
“Does this happen a lot?”
“Hey, what happened between you two?”
“When is the last time you ate?”
“Is this okay?”
“Hey.”
“This is the third meal you’ve missed this week, are you okay?”
“[Name]?”
“What did he/she/they do?”
“This … hurts you.”
“You don’t feel safe, here.”
“When you look at [trigger], you… what is that?”
“What can I do?”
“You were crying in your sleep.”
“What do you dream about?”
“Whenever you get stressed, you do this thing with your hands. What is it?”
“You’re right, I don’t understand, yet. Will you help me?”
“Should I leave a light on for you?”
“I brought you some water.”
“I won’t judge you.”
“It doesn’t have anything to do with trust. You don’t have to tell me. But I’ll listen, if you do.”
“Count your breaths with me, okay? Ready? One, two, three, four…”
“I’m here.”
“Talk to me.”
“You don’t need to tell me everything. I just want to know how I can help.”
“Let me hold your hair back, at least.”
“You used to love that [item].”
Me: i'm not active. also me: s-s-starter...call?
@noblehigh // starter !
Murphy stands on the edge of the cliff, peering down with narrow eyes. He's exhausted, and at this point, the search for his daughter is only feeling more HELPLESS than usual. He's tired. Beyond tired. Tired of not being able to settle down. Tired of not having his family together in one place. He's just...he's fucking sick of it. He's been sick of it for a long time, ever since Murphytown ended up being one, great bust.
"So --" he starts. "You coming with me or what?"
Brian's the only person who didn't kick his ass right to the curb when he left Murphytown behind.
Me: i'm not active. also me: s-s-starter...call?
nsfw prompts that don’t sound like a bad porno
i’m always tired of seeing the cringiest sentence starters for smut so i’m back at it again kids. feel free to adjust sentences or specify who does the action.
ACTIONS: 1. for one muse to give the other oral 2. to skinny dip with my muse 3. to shower with my muse 4. to take a hot bath with my muse 5. for sex in public 6. for sex in the car 7. to catch my muse naked 8. to undress my muse 9. for sparring to turn into sex 10. for an argument to turn into sex 11. for make up sex 12. for friends with benefits sex 13. to tie up my muse 14. to blindfold my muse 16. to make one muse watch the other masturbate 17. for a threesome (specify muses) 18. for one muse to wake the other by fingering them/giving a handjob 19. for one muse to deny the other orgasm 20. for angry sex 21. for break up sex 22. for sex after a near death experience 23. for after battle sex 24. for sex to get revenge on an ex 25. for one muse to give the other a lap dance or strip tease 26. to make my muse whimper 27. for one muse to take the other from behind 28. for sex against the wall 29. for sex on a table/counter/desk 30. for sex in a pool/hot tub 31. for one muse to choke the other 32. for rough sex 33. for our muses to try a new position 34. for our muses to try a new kink together 35. for one muse to use a toy on the other 36. for one muse to sit on the other’s face
WORDS: “touch me.” “kiss me here.” “you have to be quiet if you want to cum.” “say my name.” “oh fuck-” “i need you so bad.” “i’m so wet right now.” “i want you to touch yourself for me.” “let me hear you, baby.” “come for me.” “i want to hear you cum.” “harder.” “i need to feel you.” “i want you.” “you’re so hot.” “can i come yet?” “please, baby—” “i’m so close.” “i told you to be quiet.” “i told you to stay still.” “are you gonna be good for me?” “i promise i’ll be good.” “i’m not done with you yet.” “i’ve been waiting all day…” “you’re all i want.” “just kiss me, i can’t take this anymore.” “just shut up and fuck me.” “i’m gonna fuck you until you beg me to stop.” “say please.” “i could’t stop thinking about you all day.” “your fingers feel so good.” “your mouth feels so good.” “i want your fingers inside me.” “i want it to hurt.” “more—” “i want you to forget everything and everyone else but me.” “make me forget.” “i just want to feel something.” “make me.” “be quiet.” “they’re gonna catch us—” “yes— right there.” “that feels so good.” “does that feel good?”
Anyway, if anyone sees this, I still love Alvin Bernard Murphy with all my heart and soul. I probably won't be super active on this blog anymore unless someone wants to plot a little something, but I'm just happy I didn't lose this blog forever like I thought I did. God.