[mexicanajedi]

I know I said this already but the collective grief is so crazy like idk seeing so many people have the exact same emotions as u is comforting and the fact that we all grew up together is so beautiful even when I see videos of ppl being in denial I’m like yeah man. The one direction discography streams like 😭 For some reason today everyone is thinking about getting one direction tattoos including me

[mexicanajedi]

I went on a random drive yesterday and found myself in the woods and I’d been craving that for so long I found the quietest spot with a beautiful creek and I just instantly cried and hugged a tree it was so beautiful and healing

[louisandthedagger]

💔

[femstyles]

Those 5 boys and the community around them held such a strong role in shaping me and knowing one of them is just... no more... I can't explain this feeling.

[mexicanajedi]

It’s so weird how it’s a collective grief and it’s slowly starting to hit us. I couldn’t listen to their music until I watched this is us last night so I’m gonna drive around and listen to their discography today

[dearlou]

waking up these past two days has been such a sad experience

[mexicanajedi]

I really cannot put into words how much it all meant to me. And I feel so lucky to know that there are tons of people that understand and feel the exact same way, where I don’t have to explain. Being 23 now it comes back to me in flashes and I just remember the feeling the most. The absolute rush of staying up all night for a livestream of a concert, for an album to drop, or just completely freaking out about the smallest things they did which felt like the biggest deal. I know everyone has said this but the community was so so so special. Being a fan of Harry now and going to love on tour is a reminder that that community is still alive and filled with love. But the rush, the pure joy, I don’t know if I’ll ever feel that way again. I feel dramatic sometimes explaining it to people who don’t know, but in the past 24 hours I’ve felt heard and understood. Somewhere along the way it all died down, and although it feels like a dream, I’m so happy that this memory and feeling still lives with us. The rush and love I have for concerts came from the first and only time I saw them live in 2014. I remember screaming so much I almost threw up. The energy in the stadium man…it really was something so special. They are the reason for a lot of things in my life. I feel lucky to have them with me in my heart forever. It is..truly bizarre that this is happening right now. I can’t stomach not only his death but the way in which it happened and the things leading up to this. I think that’s why my initial reaction was shock and confusion, because it was not supposed to play out like this. Personally I haven’t dealt with this type of grief, and to think this is something you just have to continue to live with, that every time I listen to them now there will be a deep sadness attached to it, I don’t know how to feel. I’m thinking about 11-14 year old me heavily, nostalgia is already kicking my ass as I experience my 20s and this is the hardest thing to come to terms with that it’s all gone and over. Thank y’all for being here and making it special. For experiencing it together. The amount of love I will have in my heart for this time in my life is irreplaceable.

[berrytart]

danny devito 2022 directioner real

[mexicanajedi]

waiting only for Niall to say something does not feel right we’re not hearing from liam its only 4 of them I just can’t comprehend it

[mexicanajedi]

watching this is us rn and I’m giggling kicking my feet at the silly and sweet parts and I feel 12 again then I randomly start crying sobbing the scene of Liam’s dad dude my heart is in shambles I just can’t believe this is real life

[fuckyeahzarry-deactivated201209]

[mexicanajedi]

Having the TIME of my life on this website 10 years ago and coming back because liam payne is dead is not computing Going from crying to being in shock and denial I CANNOT look at his old pictures or listen to their music I was just listening to them today driving windows down I’m wearing my 1D shirt and I wish it was an oversized tee I only want to talk to people who get it and who were there I thought we would all be old when it happened like I don’t even know I can’t believe I have to mourn this and deal with the person he became what the fuck do you even mean

[mexicanajedi]

what the fuck are you even talking about like what do you mean

[mexicanajedi]

LIKE HELLO??????????

[mexicanajedi]

finished the first season of avatar and.......the moon spirit????? she became THE MOON SPIRIT?? the MOON.................

[mexicanajedi]

‪started watchin avatar for the first time....i think i’ll love sokka forever‬

[naprasno]

i can say embarrassing things on here because y’all are not real