Trying to find an Ao3 fic I read the description of once, which I only vaguely recall. It may not even be available anymore (I have an account, ftr), but if it is, I’m somehow failing to find it.
All I remember was that it was an AU where Katsuki, when he fell in the river as a kid, took Izuku’s hand instead. I think the summary said how this was not the world where they stopped being friends when Katsuki pushed him. Idk.
Got reminded again of my old coworker who was a massive misogynist but also trans inclusive. Told me he believed trans women are indeed women because "only women would be stupid enough to want to be women"
He also aggressively corrected himself whenever he accidentally misgendered a trans guy we knew because "there's already more women than men in the world, the more numbers we steal from them, the better." Did that even when the trans guy wasn't around.
I need to point out that he was completely serious btw. This man had no sense of humor if he tried.
He was a cook at the restaurant/bar I was a bartender at, and almost punched a costumer once because he overheard him talking about how women belong in the kitchen. Told me he thought women should stay out of kitchens, that cooking is a man's job and when I asked him what he thinks women should be doing, he went quiet for a moment, then proceeded to explain to me the following
"I trust a bitch to run a kitchen as much as she can run a country, they should do shit like plumbing. Or electricity. Something you can just learn to do and don't need to lead, you know?"
Apparently women are good at "fixing shit". He claimed that he doesn't trust male plumbers or electricians except if they're gay because "something most be wrong with you if you want to go fix other people's houses, that's that maternal instinct"
Love that you guys seem to like the stories about my Guy, here's another. (also for context i need to say that english is not the language he spoke, and when i say 'fag', i'm using it for our version of the slur. Our Guy insisted that that's just how you call gay people in our language (it isn't))
We had an openly gay coworker who looked like it (crop tops, dyed hair, make-up) and he was often harassed by the waiters from the football bar next door. The gay dude had the same name as the Guy, who insisted that we would specify the he isn't gay, so they just became "Name" and "Not Gay Name". He was fine with that.
Oh he also once went on a rant about how he respects our gay coworker more than "those other fags" because "at least he has the balls to look like a fag, yknow? None of that sneaky shit where you can't tell if they're trying to fuck you or your girlfriend." When I then told him I was bi, he looked me over and called me some slurs before telling me that I don't need to rub it in that I can get both. Then he asked me if I think he's hot and when I told him no, he informed me I should stick with women because I clearly have shit taste.
He once accidentally bullied one of our younger waitresses out of an early eating disorder she was developing before working there (she told me about it after)
Boss gave us one meal from the menu a day as a job bonus, and we had this very shy seventeen year old working with us who was already nervous around men, but Our Guy was a 6'3 dude who only stopped yelling and cursing when he was not speaking at all. If he was the one cooking that day, he'd peek out of the kitchen an hour before he'd start closing it up, and would shout at you if you haven't ordered your meal yet because he hated cooking once he already cleaned. The waitress was scared shitless of him, and so whenever he would yell at her to "fucking order already", she'd panic and just pick something.
She didn't eat much but the first time she tried to throw out almost the whole plate, he got so personally insulted that he berated her for not picking something she'd like, and demanded to know what he did wrong. He got really upset about apparently not being able to cook something that this kid would like and I'm pretty sure he started putting in extra effort to make sure she would eat it this time? It lead to him quite literally standing over her like a hawk when she ate to "see her reaction" and demand an immediate review to see what he can improve.
She later told me that it she was so scared and awkward around him back then that it kind of overrode her fear of food, and that she still sometimes pretends she's back there, when she feels a bad episode coming on, so. He did do something good for the world i guess
Our Guy met a nonbinary person once when my friend came to visit me at work. He was just on a smoke break so I had to introduce them and when I said "They're visiting" he got confused and asked us how many people are there (and then threatened murder if they dare order something while he's on a break). I had to explain this man what a nonbinary person is, he thought about it for a second, called the whole thing "fucking stupid, there ain't that shit in nature" and then proceeded to very mockingly refer to them as (our language equivalent of) "your majesty" and use the pronouns you use for people you're supposed to respect (which is genderless and very formal)
My friend thought he was really funny before I explained to them that I'm pretty sure he thought he was being mean (but hey he it wasn't misgendering so yay)
Then (after his break) they ordered a vegan sandwich and we heard him cussing them out about how "they should pick a fucking struggle". Later I asked him about it and got told that "how much shit can you deny yourself? Cheese, gender, the fuck's next?"
I like how his issue isn't with the "that shit ain't in nature" thing he mentioned, but the idea that being nonbinary is some form of self-deprivation and that they deserve a gender like everyone else.
I don’t remember much from the dream I last had, except that Izuku & Inko were Hello Kitty-style green bunnies, Izuku had been working on being a Quirkless Hero (I think he was still 14), and at night he gave his mom a forehead kiss before she went to sleep. A good dream.
Have you ever thought about how, if Sludge could utilize the Quirks of those taken over, then the Villain had been a representation of ‘stealing’ others’ Quirks, just differently than All-For-One (the power) does it? Just me?
those moments in au fics when you finally figure out how the author is reinterpreting a specific canon event and you basically go ‘oh snap that’s brilliant’ for five minutes straight
I don’t particularly want to get involved in the fandom arguments happening right now and every week, but I just gotta state some things here because all of that *gestures to The Discourse* is really stirring up my emotions. So, vent time. As the tag and username should make obvious, this is all just rambles. I’m just saying what I want, it doesn’t have to be comprehensible to anyone else.
I am a childhood abuse survivor, victim, whatever term you use. I empathize with all the Todoroki children, and Izuku for his bullying. I still think Horikoshi doing these atonement routes is good. Does it make me uncomfortable? Yeah, personally. Do I still enjoy this complex writing on this complicated topic? Yeah, a lot.
I see alotta people who just. jump Right to “you’re an abuse apologist,” “they’re an abuse apologist,” and so on. Just throwing it around to hurt people, and frankly it feels disrespectful as fuck. Tossing that around like if someone upsets you in some way you get to use that against them...makes it feel like you’re the one dismissing and trivializing the very real, intense suffering that is experiencing abuse. You know how many people I’ve seen say this to abuse victims in this fandom, without thinking, without knowing because they seemingly never stopped to consider who they could be branding? Abuse victims who have layered, insightful views on all this? Too fuckin’ many. Far too many.
Honestly, I have so much personal experience in line with the characters who’ve suffered abuse in MHA. I already touched on the Todoroki siblings, but also with the Izuku-Bakugou situation. Him getting so much love and praise when he hadn’t even shown clearly that he’d changed significantly was really unsettling for me, and I feel that way about Endeavor now too. I don’t feel that either character has done anything remotely near enough in their atonement arcs yet. However, I do think it’s important they continue.
The things they did will never be okay. They will never “make up for” the harm they’ve caused, because trauma does not work like that. It’s deep and scarring and permanent. Victims can heal in many ways and various degrees, but those wounds can’t be removed. They never disappear. They don’t even really fade, even in the most recovered individuals. Whether the memories are repressed or forgotten or no longer thought about, the impacts remain. They stay with you. That’s a key part of what makes inflicting trauma so horrendous. It’s, in my opinion, like a living-death for someone. It can be a one-time event or repeated over time, but it kills the person who used to, would eventually and could have existed. It’s devastating. Destructive. It steals who you are and what you could’ve been and things you will never get back.
I still think that these atonement arcs are good, because they’re not dismissive and they’re real. They acknowledge so much more than I would’ve ever hoped for in a fictional story (a shounen at that). That victims have different responses, feelings towards the trauma, the source of it, even the other victims involved. That it’s complicated. That’s it’s messy and even the “forgive and move forward” path that is usually pushed as being enough to fix everything, is messy and complicated and not some instant cure-all to the pain and loss. This, this exploration of trauma is so important to me. The fact that Bakugou and Endeavor are getting so much is still difficult for me to stomach, because it’s all very personal to me. I’ve had my own Endeavors and Bakugous. I’ve lost so much of myself to the kind of cruelty they inflicted on others, so yeah, it strikes deep.
Narratively, however, atonement is necessary. The world of MHA needs this to be established. It needs to say, these are still people, they have depth. Because to say otherwise is to dehumanize them. That’s easy and would be a nice escape for some of us to curl up in and enjoy. The “bad guys” who abused others and you can project the source of your trauma(s) onto suffer and get no forgiveness, do not get a better, more self-aware life, they just pay. It’d be a nice relief fantasy. But that isn’t MHA, and personally I appreciate that. It’s not easy to, but I support Horikoshi treating this complex truth with depth and messy emotional highs and lows.
Dabi’s villainous actions are wrong, but being happy that Endeavor—his abuser, the cause of his trauma—is suffering? No, that’s fair. Hell, I’ve been supporting what Horikoshi’s doing, but I was still right there with Dabi being gleeful as fuck for him during his dance, because he is a victim and some part of me would love to see my abusers suffer for what they did, too. I also know that he himself has become a cruel and harmful person now though, even not adding in the murders (which are very important to remember), so no I don’t think his actions are okay or should be treated as such. And when fans say that? They’re not abuse apologists. That’s it, full stop.
These characters and events are all multilayered and have tons of meaning, but certain things are bad and certain things are understandable and certain things come down to personal choice.
• Murder and terrorism are bad.
• Wanting people who traumatized you to suffer is understandable.
• Supporting or not supporting abusers getting atonement arcs is personal.
Remember that MHA is a heavy and complex story. That trauma is a heavy and complex topic. That this is heavy and complex writing.
Some things are overwhelmingly complicated with trauma, a lot in fact, but harming others is wrong with or without trauma involved. Obviously I mean harm outside of necessary action (example: self-defense), but that should really go without saying.
Dabi being a villain doesn’t erase his feelings as an abuse victim and he has every right to those feelings, but his trauma will never excuse his actions. He gets to feel angry and hateful towards his abuser, to want him in pain, and we can share in that with him, but that’s not the same as being justified in his behavior and it doesn’t mean we can’t also acknowledge he’s in the wrong there.
I love that Natsuo hates Endeavor and won’t forgive him. I love that Fuyumi and Rei know they’ve been hurt but want to see Endeavor rehabilitate himself because that’s what would give them peace, I love that Shouto’s conflicted but open to seeing things work out while still remaining unapologetic in his hate, I love that Dabi wants his abuser to suffer, and I love that Izuku chooses to see Bakugou as a person and support him even though he knows what he’s done to him is not okay (although he still hasn’t faced the full weight of his trauma or it’s impact on his self-worth but I see the signs and know he will), that it’s okay if victims never forgive. I. Love. This.
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