Void of the Universe

A place to vent, a place to scream, a place to never be found. If you found me, no you didn't. 27 y/o anything

[midnightfox6446]

There is no right way to approach someone while the other person is overseas on a trip. There is no right way to address issues for your partner without it coming off aggressive and overly protective. There is no right way to have a serious conversation over text.

There is no right way to have friends outside of work in a society that relies on everyone working in their adult life. Friends in the workplace is common now. And.... There is no right way to keep friends in the workplace, ever. If it was socially okay, one would pull away from everyone to undo damage... But it's not okay.

[bpd-culture-is]

bpd culture is watching all your friends slowly drift away from you and feeling sad about it even tho it’s definitely 99% your own doing.

.

[honeypleasejustkillme]

my toxic trait is that if i’m in an internal split i never speak up, i just get mad and distance myself until i’m not mad anymore

[borderlinesadgirl]

I'm so tired of everytime one small argument or inconvenience breaks out I want to end it and self destruct, it's so draining.

[borderlinereminders]

Someone not responding to you right away does not mean that you’re not important to them. I know it can be hard, but other people are allowed to be busy, or even just not have the energy to respond to you. This doesn’t mean they don’t care about you.

[midnightfox6446]

I haven't openly vented on this in a long while. Haven't had a need to. I used my Google docs for that.

But... None of that feels right anymore. It doesn't hit like it used to, like screaming into the void.

I have been diagnosed with Borderline personality disorder for almost a year and I'm doing everything in my power to not make myself a stereotype to it. But... It's a personality disorder, so I naturally have it be my WHOLE personality. I have the "quiet" subtype so everything I experience is inward and usually directed towards myself.

It... It is so hard to not be that part of myself now that it has been identified. To not let it take over or me use it against others or fake more symptoms.

I'm... Beginning to wonder what I have been faking though. Because some things are harder to tell the difference or straight up empty feeling.

That's a tangent for another day though. My whole reason for this was to talk about my current issues. I'm... Hah.. experiencing envy for emotionally connection. I'm closing myself off again and pulling the role of worker bee. I'm.... Not sure I'm doing well, but I can't tell if I'm causing this for mental/emotional self harm or if it's genuinely reaction from the personality disorder. I don't expect any responses or anything on here.

Screaming into the void is all I want. It's better that way than to overwhelm others with needless problems...

[chronicallyonlinesworld]

[n3r0ly-th3re]

“Stop making your disorder your personality”

Brother I have a personality disorder

[decemberinthedark-deactivated20]

One of the stranger things I've noticed lately is the intrusive feeling of alienation that comes with socializing with BPD.

It's that pervasive feeling that you're nothing more than a ticking time bomb and that everyone around you knows it, so they put on their facades and go about their days putting up with you instead of actually enjoying being around you. It's the notion that you're only tolerated, and nothing more.

It's that feeling that no matter what, you're excluded from ever having a "normal person" relationship. Its perceived as a part of the human experience that's closed off to you, forever leaving you banging the gates with a perpetually out-of-reach sense of camaraderie locked behind.

Splitting is awful, granted... but what's been really been soul-crushing lately is how it conditions you to be terrified of your own thoughts, and whether you're masking those thoughts enough to put on a facade of your own and exist in the world without judgment.

It's exhausting on a good day, unbearable the rest of the time.

[fakephonenumber]

@socalgal

[swordseer]

Most autistic dog to ever exist

[waterwizardcat]

I draw too many vash recently he started to look like woodstock to me

[waterwizardcat]

[waterwizardcat]

people's voice is heard

now you have wolfwood as snoopy

[jokeboy-deactivated20260221]

accidentally told a customer the wrong price and like the little f slur I am I said "oopsie! I lied to you hold on" and she without any pause said "all liars go to hell" 😐🫡

[only-tiktoks]

[bpdcrybaby213]

My boyfriend wants me to internalize my feelings more. My mom doesn't want to hear about my feelings. So, fine. I will work hard to internalize and not tell people things. I will grit my teeth and deal with it on my own. I will become a quiet borderline even if it kills me.

[natazilla]

sluttycat

[bpdcrybaby213]

When you start feeling better after an episode and it's kinda bullshit because you wanted to isolate and give up but now you're calm and your mentally ill ass had a change in moods.

[zukaichu]

Significant otter 🦦🦦

Thought I might share this piece on here too ^-^