[poems-and-word]

Poems & Words

[illinicoise]

“But if you forget to reblog Madame Zeroni, you and your family will be cursed for always and eternity.”

[spn-fandom-breathing-heavily]

not even risking that shit

[codyslipring-deactivated2015060]

scrolled past this, re-evaluated my life, then SCROOOLLLED back up and hit the damn reblog button. 

[isamaegreenleaf]

Last comment same thing. Sorry to the next person who sees this. I just can’t risk it. I have things I need to do before my life becomes hell. Lol

[nnfirnid]

man i fucking hate yall who tf put this up knowing damn well we all gonna reblog it im heated im really sick af bout this 

[modelinterrupted]

I don’t play that shit lol sorry

[latenightsugar]

WHyyyy

[badgyal-k-deactivated20190901]

Sorry everyone

[just-jay25]

If only if only the woodpecker sighs the bark on the tree was as soft as the sky why the wolf waits below hungry and lonely he cries to the moon if only if only

[kixgbear]

Shiddd

[angiebkxo-deactivated20180626]

this post followed me to Facebook and im sooo annoyed!

[manynamedshe]

It’s been a MINUTE since I’ve seen Madame Zeroni, fr fr

[glamhoeour-deactivated20251207]

I HATE TUMBLR FKKKK SAKES

LMAOOOO

[venusians]

Not tryna fuck up any of my planetary Returns~

[andro-djinni-of-the-lamp]

I reblogged this yesterday but idc, I ain’t playing games with Madame Zeroni or Mama Kitt

[chocolatefantasy13-deactivated2]

😂😂

[honeybeeluck-deactivated2018101]

Madame Zeroni ain’t for play play

[imjustjason]

Fuck it, hope she bless me

[30thchamber-deactivated20190424]

But what if a nigga don’t reblog this and they great great great grand kid finds a treasure chest?🤔

[writefroot-deactivated20181124]

What year did this start? I’m always feels my like I have to reboot this

[groovychick-s]

not risking shitttt

[littlescorpion6]

The fuck, guys? I don’t even know who she is bur damn I’ve been cursed before so I ain’t risking

[happydaysandersen]

The fuck you mean you don’t know who she is?!

[siriuslycollins-blog]

she gets re-blogged on my dashboard at least once a week?

[royallyprincesslilly]

I live in fear of this post.

[esoteric-law89-deactivated20241]

Not tonight dammit!

[girlwhocried5sauce]

For all my plus size girls

- Coconut oil or shea butter is great for boob sweat smelliness, since it seals in moisture (it works for me, however if you’re protein sensitive or prone to body acne you might not want to do this)

- Diluted essential oils, natural deodorant or shea butter for thigh chafing. I wouldnt recommend antiperspirant cause aluminum and all that jazz.

- Crop tops? WEAR THEM.

- They want you to ride their face but you’re scared? Do it. They’re grown. They will find a way to breathe.  (I mean, make sure you dont cover both their mouth and nose for safety reasons)

- Afraid to have sex with the lights on? Girl, they knew what they signed up for, flaunt them stretch marks. Guarantee you that your confidence will turn them on even more.

- Double chin troubles? Search for contouring videos on youtube

- Having trouble with confidence? Walk with your shoulders back and your head high, I promise you it works

-Scared to eat in fear of judgment? Please eat, they’re probably not paying you any attention and if they are? Fuck em

- Worried about if you could get away with wearing that? Well I’m telling you that you CAN. 

- Friends who make negative comments about your weight are not your friends !!!!

And last but not least important, ALWAYS remember:

-YOU FUCKING PRETTY, BITCH

[regretiblyme]

“I want to cry. But I can’t, I don’t know how anymore. I go from feeling nothing at all to feeling everything all at once and I can’t handle it anymore.”

— regretiblyme

[d0nn0]

Well this is me

[daughterofdessalines]

What is the divine feminine ?? It’s not a color, it’s not a shape, it’s not a face, it’s a fucking vibe. It’s owning the essence of your power. Unapologetically projecting and creating existence that you want to receive back. If projecting insecurity via a painbody, you will attract back situations that will cause you to continue to question yourself. A lot of times we can project our insecurities as women in being overly sexual. We can project that we are convincing ourself we have more to offer but because we aren’t getting the attention we want organically, we force it by exploiting ourselves not knowing that attracts the wrong attention. Be a fierce, sexual diva, but if you’re doing it from a place of pain, know that, that is what is typically going to be returned to you. Get into this fierce ass diva though, owning her divine feminine @rashidakhanbey ISSA VIBE ✨

[depresseddisneyprincess]

in case you want to die tonight this is your sign to stay alive

[veryfunnymemes]

[goosekuraleap-deactivated202102]

I see no difference in energy here

[kingdra]

You forgot the blueberries.

[reptlia-deactivated20221222]

reBLOGGING THIS AGAIN BECAUSE  I’M  SCRMEAINFJWM DER

[lonaturaltorpe]

This will NEVER not be funny 😂😂😂😂😭😭

[soft-ghetto-tomatoes]

I list it when it slowed up

[fatandbougie]

lmao, I knew it was gon be some shit when the sister came doin all that talkin and movin.

[r-e-doubleindefinitely]

Fucking classic.

[sleptonshawt-e]

I forgot why I favorited this and now I know why fuuuuuck 😂😂

[yenonpluto]

In tears

[somaliiii]

I’m making flan for the first time and I’m so scared it’s going to turn out bad

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

there should be a german word for that ambiguous fear of trying a new recipe and not knowing how it will end

[somaliiii]

The only word close to that right now is stress

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

not specific enough. we should invent a word. let’s see what should we use as a root. hmm i suggest the prefix -noia from paranoia 

[somaliiii]

Sounds good but what would the suffix be?

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

opsie -noia is a suffix, i typoed. for a prefix then, let’s see…something to do with cooking, baking, let me take a look

ok not loving any of these… well maybe bacanoia? how’s that sound?

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

scratch all of that. i was over thinking. culinary + paranoia = culinoia

there, that’s it. 

cu·li·noi·a

ˈkələˈnoiə

noun

    a feeling of suspicion or anxiety surrounding the outcome of a new recipe.   

[somaliiii]

Oh my god you are the smartest person I know

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

That’s really unfortunate

[sabertoothwalrus]

unmute

[copperbadge]

I have never so joyously reblogged a bird video in my life. 

[pacificrim-archive]

[rocketmermaid]

Giant isopods are so cool but what’s with the sexy funk music

[hussainthemvp]

most sexual motherfucker in the ocean. 

[rip-myselfesteem]

and no one noticed.

[angelarecamier]

if u reblog this in 45 seconds u will meet ur favorite musician(s). no matter what. they will be raised from the dead 4 u.

[sunflowr-vol-6]

i am not risking it

[neo-zeon]

HIS HAIR?

[nflstreet-deactivated20180710]

WACK

[neo-zeon]

HIS GEAR??

[nflstreet-deactivated20180710]

WACK

[neo-zeon]

HIS JEWELRY???

[nflstreet-deactivated20180710]

[neo-zeon]

HIS FOOTSTANCE!?

[nflstreet-deactivated20180710]

[neo-zeon]

THE WAY THAT HE TALKS!??

[nflstreet-deactivated20180710]

[neo-zeon]

THE WAY THAT HE DOESNT EVEN LIKE TO SMILE!?!?

[nflstreet-deactivated20180710]

[neo-zeon]

ME?

[nflstreet-deactivated20180710]

[supershybutpushingthroughit]

I’m impressed by how aggressive the font is

[dreamlightasafeather]

IF YOU NEED TO CALL 911 BUT ARE SCARED TO BECAUSE OF SOMEONE IN THE ROOM, dial and ask for a pepperoni pizza. They will ask if you know you’re calling 911. Say yes, and continue pretending you’re making an order. They’ll ask if there’s someone in the room.

You can ask how long it will take for the pizza to get to you, and they will tell you how far away a dispatcher is.

Here is an example video

[t-pose-to-assert-gayness]

Reblog to literally save a life

[anotherdayforchaosfay]

I’ve done this.  I’m alive because of this. 

My flat-mate’s date for the night was almost as drunk as her.  She had passed out in her room and locked the door.  He refused to leave because he wanted to have sex.  He also demanded food because he was dealing with “whiskey dick”.  He didn’t like the lack of food in the fridge.  I called 911, did the stuff stated above, and he was getting PISSED about how long the “order” was taking.  He took my phone, demanded they “hurry the fuck up”.  Police arrived two minutes later, arrested him, and helped me file a police report.  Pressing charges wasn’t necessary because he had warrants on him from THREE different states for the very thing he planned to do to me.  Several months after this happened one of the officers informed me he was charged with two felonies because he crossed stay lines, and will be serving no less than 35 years in prison.  The officer ripped into my flat-mate about her bringing home complete strangers, while drunk, knowing full well this shit could happen. 

This was 14 years ago.  

Do the pizza order, do it as calmly as you can.  The dispatcher I spoke to said things like this:

“If he’s drunk say you want mushrooms.”  I said I want extra mushrooms.

“If he’s threatening you with sexual assault say you want onions.”  I said I want onions.

She went like this with different toppings and sauces for a description of him, like pineapple if he’s blonde, black olives if he’s tall, extra large if he’s tall, etc.

They’ve heard this sort of coded call before.  They’re trained for it.  They will understand what you’re saying.  Order the pizza.

[torios]

Really though. I’m in training for dispatch and this was one of the first things they taught us. Pretend you’re talking to a friend or relative, pretend you’re ordering pizza, we’ll figure it out. We’ll word questions so you can answer in an easy, casual way. Please, just make the call and we will do everything we can to help you.

[skelatal-remains-deactivated201]

Reblog to save a life

[mouse-named-minerva]

Why the fuck is this not more widely known?

[thin-for-the-win90]

!!!!!!

[chadgamer]

your heart is a muscle the size of a rat

[lesbianredpanda]

SPONGE BOB SQUARE PANTS

[martian-martian-martian]

Your brain’s about four times the size of a cat’s

[hzs-modblog]

SPONGE BOB SQUARE PANTS

[lawbreaker13]

Your lungs can hold 5.5 liters of air

[dreamsanddabs]

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS

[lawbreaker13]

The soles of your feet can never grow hair

[ineedtostopchangingmyusername]

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS

[lawbreaker13]

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS

[theswedishelf]

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS

[lawbreaker13]

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS

[theswedishelf]

SPONGEBOB…

[lawbreaker13]

SQUAREPAAAAAAAANTS

[theswedishelf]

*~deedlee-doot-dee-doot doo-oot~*