Milla Marie 💙🖤🩵

Born in ‘98. She/her. While you’re reading my bio; go stream Taylor Swift’s music (Taylor’s Version) 💕

[millamarie]

“There will be one phrase that comes up again and again. It’s not the scariest I’ve dealt with, but it is the most effective at derailing this important conversation. It will say, ‘Not all men’. And to that I’ll say this; No not all men, but too many. Too many men for some reason, feel entitled to women and marginalized genders’ bodies. Too many men, wether through action or inaction, are perpetuating a culture of sexism that breeds inequality and that leads to violence. And if you want to use the phrase ‘Not all men’, how about we use it like this?

Not all men are calling out their friends when he says something to a woman he would never say to a guy. Not all men are looking up these phrases, learning what rape culture really is, how misogyny really operates. And no, not all men are perpetrators, of course they’re not. But all the once who aren’t should be solving this with us. Because maybe if they were, we’d be living in a society where when I talk to guys or male politicians about sexual violence, they want to solve it with me more than they want to prove that they’re not the problem.” - Gina Martin, TED talk on YouTube

https://youtu.be/_K_n-x-W7pY

[millamarie]

“[…] I realized that this was all part of a much wider phenomenon that seems to plague UK university campuses. What is this phenomenon? Rape culture. Now ‘what is rape culture?’ some of you might be asking yourselves. You’ve seen it in headlines and articles, on your news feed. And whilst it is easy to point your fingers at the perpetrators alone since they are the one, after all, causing the pain and hurt. This phenomenon is way way bigger. This phenomenon goes way way further than a bunch of silly lads on a little group chat trying to one-up each other with their ‘edgy jokes’, no. Rape culture are the laws that hold women responsible for aborting a baby that was conceived as the result of her rape. Rape culture is taking advantage of someone on a night out who is clearly too inebriated to make any rational decisions about their own body. Rape culture is saying a girl is ‘asking for it’ when she wears something that you consider too revealing. Rape culture is pressuring your partner into having sex with you but telling them that it’s ‘okay because you love them and you would never really hurt them’. Rape culture is listing the girls in your friendship group in the order that you would like to pin them down in as if it’s a sport you can get a medal for. Rape culture is the the dark corners of popular online forums like 4Chan where intel’s fantazise about all the ways they love to hurt and humiliate women. Rape culture is the institutions that allow perpetrators to continue their violent behaviour in atmospheres where victims should be the priority, and where the victims should be safe. And as my favourite gender studies writer Kristen Solay puts it; Rape culture is the rape joke and the audience that laughs along. Now to be honest, I could stand here and go on for days about what I think rape culture is, but everyday feminism.com provides a really really extensive list on what they think it is, and to be honest I think you all should give it a read. Especially you university students. I won’t be surprised if you witnessed some of these aspects every day in your university experience.” - Nicole Wilson, TED talk on YouTube

https://youtu.be/CiprQC0e-xo

[heartstoppercomic]

Mini-Comic: Dear Diary

12-year-old Nick writes a journal entry about his friends.

Read Heartstopper Online

More info/buy the books: https://aliceoseman.com/

Heartstopper updates three times a month, on the 1st, 11th, and 21st at 11am UK time.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!!! ❤️❤️❤️

[traumasurvivors]

I promise that a beautiful and happy life is still obtainable for you, no matter how much of it you lost because of your trauma. It’s not fair that you lost so much of it due to trauma. And you deserved so much better. But you can still make a beautiful and happy life for yourself.

[drowningbydegrees]

We have exactly one Christmas tradition in my house, and it feels very important to share it. I've been a cat person basically forever and for most of my adult life, my house has had more cats than people in it. They've all liked sleeping under the Christmas tree and all that, but other than that, they always just sort of ignored it.

But in 2018, we got Natasha.

There are about a dozen pictures like that, but I always adopt adult cats, so we figured this just came with having a kitten in the house. She was just this tiny little fluff who still fit in my cupped hands despite being about six months old, so we put away the ornaments, shrugged it off, and took advantage of the opportunity to have a really cute Christmas card the next year.

Then, 2019 came around.

Natasha escalated to sleeping in the tree in between trying to eat all the branches, and honestly, it was too funny to make more than a cursory effort to stop her. My partner and I assumed that since she was still pretty tiny, she had more growing to do and would surely get to a point where her own body weight would keep her from doing this. In the meantime, we left the tree without ornaments that year and just called it good.

But then 2020 came around, forcing us to acknowledge that:

Natasha was not going to get too big to do this. At this point it had become clear that she wasn't developing slowly. She was just a really tiny cat. She's less than half the size of any other cat I've ever had.

Natasha was also not going to chill out enough to stop doing this.

But hey. Who needs ornaments with a face like that poking out of the branches at you all the time?

Sure enough, 2021 Natasha also had zero chill about the tree, but at this point it would have been weirder if she did leave it alone.

I thought I had seen everything, but this year I'd been kind of down and my partner decided to surprise me by setting up the tree and stuff while I was at work. It was an incredibly sweet gesture considering they don't actually even like Christmas decorations. It also meant I got to come home to this.

I kept expecting her to fall out, but she just chilled there, surveying the room until she got bored. And yes, that is absolutely a big, fancy cat tree she's ignoring in favor of scaling the Christmas tree.

Two days before Christmas, she has finally gotten bored enough that I'm making my first attempt in ages to actually put up ornaments. At this point, I'm not sure if I'll be more disappointed if they have to come down or if they don't.

[drowningbydegrees]

The tradition continues!

[drowningbydegrees]

It's that time of year again! I wasn't even done putting the tree up this time...

[weavemama]

DO NOT SUPPORT SALVATION ARMY 

[jackharknessday]

I can back this up. It isn’t only their shelters.

I have a family friend who worked at our local Salvation Army headquarters as a a secretary. This particular office took all the Christmas donations for children in need, put them in a warehouse, and on a designated day the staff and their friends picked through them all, taking whatever they wanted. She saw people hauling away bikes donated for specific families. Some local children had hundreds of dollars of gifts donated in their name, and on Christmas they received three cheap things, items likely not even from the person who sponsored them.

My friend quit, and I’ve not given them a dime of my money since then.

Do not give to the Salvation Army.

[gayfeatherfiend]

Do Not. Give. To. Salvation. Army

[rab-it-deactivated20231030]

My turn.

I’m a wildfire and disaster logistics specialist.

I deal with a lot of agencies who provide disaster relief.

I used to say the Salvation Army’s disaster services were the one (literally the ONE) good thing they did.

They would come in, set up a canteen trailer, make and pass out hot coffee and donated food in a disaster, usually being one of the first agencies to get there and the last to leave.

Then I found out.

Every time they did this, regardless of if they were actually invited or deployed by the agency in charge (usually FEMA, sometimes others) they would SELF-DEPLOY. Meanjng they would just show up. Ok. That’s not TOO bad, sometimes agencies have to take initiative and get there before the red tape is sorted out. BUT. They, after they left at the end of the incident, they would send FEMA or the host agency a BILL. They used one or two paid employees (usually the driver of the truck and a supervisor); and many VOLUNTEERS, but they would bill for EVERYONE’s Labor at standard federal rates. They would bill for the food they distributed even though it was all donated by another agency or private parties. They would bill for the coffee they made and the supplies. Except they would use electricity from the shelter location, water from donations or from the shelter, and in many cases, they would get the coffee and industrial filters DONATED, but bill for them at retail prices.

Don’t FUCKING give to the Salvation Army.

[knight-of-vengeance-deactivated]

The Salvation Army is also ass to the workers. A good number of people join it, naively thinking that it’s doing good, and end up leaving cynical and beaten down. The management is hostile, if not outright abusive, and demand some ridiculous hours of it lower to mid-level staff. Don’t support these people.

[fisharescary802]

Unsettling update

[oldearthaccretionist]

Find better local charities and shelters and give to them instead!

[moonybyte]

Also just for even more horrific context on the original twitter thread?

Salvation Army reached out to Milknmuffins and asked what shelter she’s at with the promise to address the abuse in it. She…ended up saying where she was. She was thrown out onto the street. It’s also all on Twitter.

They invited her to a personal talk so she could explain the situation in person.

And then they threatened her with a screenshot of a rape-threat made supposedly by her:

And then threw her out into the street while claiming she broke house rules that

So yeah, the Salvation Army is a bunch of entitled assholes that will treat the most vulnerable like shit if they dare try to do anything that makes them look bad

[supernovafirefly]

The “Fuck Salvation Army” posts are making the rounds again, so conisder this your reminder: Do. Not. Give. These. Assholes. A. Single. Fucking. Penny.

Do not support them in any way, shape, or form.

[eagletrekkie]

‘Tis the season to say FUCK the Salvation Army.

[hee-blee-art]

(please click for better quality) 

a comic for tdor featuring lyrics from “famous last words” by mcr. that song hits different today.

this trans day of remembrance, remember not only those we have lost, but our trans brothers, sisters and siblings that are here with us, struggling along side us. we are each other’s family; we are each other’s home.

honor the dead. fight for the living. stay safe.

[image ID: a digital comic set to lyrics from the song “famous last words” by my chemical romance. the comic starts drawn in white on a black background, and gradually shifts to being drawn in white, pink, and blue.

it begins with a hand next to the text: “now I know;” followed by a bust of a short haired person next to the text: “that I can’t make you stay;” then a partial bust of a person with long hair in a jacket covered in patches and pins, one of which is a heart patch with a trans symbol in it, next to the text: “but where’s your heart?” then it shows the tops of some powerlines with the text: “and I know there’s nothing I can say.”

next it shows a memorial site with a poster and flowers at the bottom of a lamp post with the text: “to change that part;” then there are a large collection of lit candles with the text: “so many bright lights that cast a shadow;” next, a person in a puffy coat holding a piece of paper with the text: “but can I speak?” where the word speak is scribbled out; next shown in a group of transphobic protestors holding anti-trans signs and yelling with the text: “is it hard understanding.”

next shown two figures with hatched wrists and ankles reaching out to each other with the text: “why I’m ‘incomplete’?” where the word “incomplete” is in quotation marks; next is a panel of a mourning crowd, with three crying young people at the front, paired with the text: “I see you laying next to me;” then there is a picture frame with a portrait next to a burning candle, where the face of the portrait is replaced with the words “rest in power” and paired with the text: “with words I thought I’d never speak.”

next shown is a line up of five silhouettes in blue, pink, and white with the text: “awake and unafraid, asleep or dead;” next is a drawing of a thin person with brown skin and a shaved head dressed in blue and pink holding up a large trans flag and shouting, shown next to a transparent figure with curly hair wearing a dress, who is also shouting and supporting the first person’s wrist as they hold up their flag, wrapped with the text: “I am not afraid to keep on living.”

next shown is a bust of a person with tan skin and chin-length blue hair smiling and crying the stripes of the trans flag down their cheek and rubbing their other eye with the text: “I am not afraid to walk this world alone;” next, the background fades from a starry sky pattern to a blue sky with pink clouds showing the text: “honey if you stay you’ll be forgiven, nothing you can say can stop me going home.” at the bottom of the page, a silhouette looks up into the sky at the final lines of text. end ID]

[hee-blee-art]

(please click for better quality) 

a comic for tdor featuring lyrics from “famous last words” by mcr. that song hits different today.

this trans day of remembrance, remember not only those we have lost, but our trans brothers, sisters and siblings that are here with us, struggling along side us. we are each other’s family; we are each other’s home.

honor the dead. fight for the living. stay safe.

[image ID: a digital comic set to lyrics from the song “famous last words” by my chemical romance. the comic starts drawn in white on a black background, and gradually shifts to being drawn in white, pink, and blue.

it begins with a hand next to the text: “now I know;” followed by a bust of a short haired person next to the text: “that I can’t make you stay;” then a partial bust of a person with long hair in a jacket covered in patches and pins, one of which is a heart patch with a trans symbol in it, next to the text: “but where’s your heart?” then it shows the tops of some powerlines with the text: “and I know there’s nothing I can say.”

next it shows a memorial site with a poster and flowers at the bottom of a lamp post with the text: “to change that part;” then there are a large collection of lit candles with the text: “so many bright lights that cast a shadow;” next, a person in a puffy coat holding a piece of paper with the text: “but can I speak?” where the word speak is scribbled out; next shown in a group of transphobic protestors holding anti-trans signs and yelling with the text: “is it hard understanding.”

next shown two figures with hatched wrists and ankles reaching out to each other with the text: “why I’m ‘incomplete’?” where the word “incomplete” is in quotation marks; next is a panel of a mourning crowd, with three crying young people at the front, paired with the text: “I see you laying next to me;” then there is a picture frame with a portrait next to a burning candle, where the face of the portrait is replaced with the words “rest in power” and paired with the text: “with words I thought I’d never speak.”

next shown is a line up of five silhouettes in blue, pink, and white with the text: “awake and unafraid, asleep or dead;” next is a drawing of a thin person with brown skin and a shaved head dressed in blue and pink holding up a large trans flag and shouting, shown next to a transparent figure with curly hair wearing a dress, who is also shouting and supporting the first person’s wrist as they hold up their flag, wrapped with the text: “I am not afraid to keep on living.”

next shown is a bust of a person with tan skin and chin-length blue hair smiling and crying the stripes of the trans flag down their cheek and rubbing their other eye with the text: “I am not afraid to walk this world alone;” next, the background fades from a starry sky pattern to a blue sky with pink clouds showing the text: “honey if you stay you’ll be forgiven, nothing you can say can stop me going home.” at the bottom of the page, a silhouette looks up into the sky at the final lines of text. end ID]

[daily-spooky]

[cccat-in-a-meat-sack]

me, with both:...

[millamarie]

“Abuse can feel like love, starving people will eat anything.” - Damon Torrance from Kill Switch by Penelope Douglas

[catchymemes]

[kennedyskiddo]

mreow (it's me)

[traumasurvivors]

Nothing justifies abuse, and you are allowed to hate whoever abused you, regardless of who they are or what factors were involved in their own life.

[traumasurvivors]

Here’s a reminder that if your parents/guardians were ones that threatened to “send you away” anytime you acted out or didn’t live up to their expectations, this was wrong and you deserved so much better. I know my parents used to threaten to send me to a school away from them because my grades suffered. It felt awful.

If you have trauma because of it, your trauma is valid. This sort of emotionally abusive tactic from parents/guardians can make a child feel that their love is conditional and can also make a child feel they can and deserve to be discarded if they do something wrong. I want you to know that you should never have been made to feel that way and that it’s okay to make mistakes. You deserved so much better than this.

[micdotcom]

This is what it’s like to have dyslexia. Web developer Victor Widell is hoping to shine a light on the learning disorder with this creative coding simulation.

[6teeth-deactivated20200318]

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is what it looks like for me !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So accurate !!!!!!

[cameoamalthea]

This! It can be so hard for people to get it. I’ve been told “you can’t have a disability” because I did well in school or because I have a law degree, because I scored high on the LSAT (which was despite not being able to finish it). Learning disabilities don’t = stupid, it’s just slower and more difficult to read/spell.

[traumasurvivors]

I think what some people don't get when they're saying that you need to forgive in order to let go and move on is that.. for some of us... Not forgiving is what gives us peace and allows us to move on.

Not forgiving and admitting I didn't forgive him was like a breath of fresh air. I felt lighter. I felt able to move on. Trying to forgive because I was "supposed" to actually kept me stuck in it. Not forgiving was me saying that what he did was wrong, and I didn't deserve it. It was me realizing I wasn't at fault and to blame. Not forgiving was healing to me.

It's so valid if you forgive and it helped you, but others are equally as valid if they realize forgiveness wasn't for them.

[traumasurvivors]

It’s valid if your trauma damaged you. It doesn’t affect your worth in any way. It doesn’t make you weak. It doesn’t mean you’re a failure.

It’s okay to need to heal. It’s not fair that you have to heal from your trauma. But it’s not a sign of weakness that you need to.

[traumasurvivors]

“Well, it could have been worse!”

Maybe that’s true. But it should have been better. At the end of the day, you should have never had to undergo something that traumatized you or hurt you in any way. And the fact that it “could have been worse” does not mean that you’re not allowed to have feelings about it.

[assassinated-sunrise]

Tag yourself! I'm somewhere between F1 and F2!!

[paulgadzikowski]

B1 or C1. Maybe D1

[omorka]

C5-ish, although I would love if there were a third axis for skill at performing the gender(s) selected, because I suuuuuuuuck at performing *either* masculinity or femininity.

[theabigailthorn]

terfs like: YOU SUNK MY BATTLESHIP!

[brightlotusmoon]

I think D5 hits more than anything. Or do I hit D5?