Sometimes I would like more clarity from our main characters, not because I'm a nosy bitch (I am but it's not what I'm talking about here) but because the fandom lacks a code of ethics and online behavior.
Nic talks sometimes and we can see it's working, it's not magic but let's remember the "normalize not filming strangers..." and how the fandom helped to clean her tags.
Some things shouldn't even have to be told so I won't extend myself on this too long. Just a quick reminder: don't go under their's or their loved ones sm post to make comments about their private life, their bodies, their sexuality,... Don't troll or harass anyone, and if you're a big account with a lot of visibility, be clear about the fact that what you share will never be an excuse to go trolling or harassing real people. Yes everybody can have an opinion but freedom of speech knows limits.
Now I'll address some messages that I think they have sent to the fandom:
-Focus on their craft, their achievement, her charities and not their personal life. Yes I'm the biggest of the hypocrites saying that as I'm engaging in the shipping side of their fandom. But in my defense, on my other accounts, I only like and share these aspects of their public activities. And I think that this is what matters, give engagement to their achievement and not to gossip pages, don't worry if something pops there, you'll know it on Twitter, TikTok, reddit or Tumblr. Because engagement is money and money is given to paparazzi or used to keep those pages and mags that pressurize them. Don't call me naïve, oc it's a system and they are tools that celebrities can use too. But too much engagement in their private life leads to a level of scrutiny that is really toxic. So let's keep it quiet so they're not privileged targets anymore.
-Stop speculating publicly about someone's sexuality, Nic has liked a few posts about it. Again, I'm the first one making jokes about Nic's gay bestie in private but I'm not doing it publicly. Jake makes it clear that he's not straight, that's the only thing he wants to be known publicly (plus, for the dummies here: sexuality is a spectrum and can be fluid). And sure, gay isn't an insult but it's not a valid argument. You can't erase history or be blind to actual discrimination that this community is facing. And talking about sexuality isn't like talking about your favorite vegetables, I would be really pissed if I was in Jake's shoes. Again let's be empathetic, joking and gossiping privately about someone who wants to be a public figure is fair game, acting as the mental health of another human being doesn't matter will never be ok.
-Stop speculating publicly about pregnancy. It's a sensitive topic for millions of reasons. I really hope that Nic isn't aware of this narrative but I doubt it. Even if you think that she's hiding it with clothes, corsets, non alcoholic beers and cocktails, respect it.
-They're more than ok with the Lukola shipping, they even fuel it. Nic brings Luke a lot on her sm and interviews. Yes she uses the word friendship but it's buried under a discourse about their unique relationship/love or with pictures couple coded. Luke is less present online but the Lukola content (not even really polin if you think about it) is, proportionally to his online activity, loud. You can see it as you want: as a professional obligation or at least because they are pushed to do it by shondaland, because they find it cute and as a compliment to their acting skills, because they are secretly together, because it gives positive engagement on their sm, because they are obsessed with each other and hope that one day lukolas will be right (wink wink), because they enjoy to showcase their unique friendship,... Or it's a combination of more than one of these reasons. The fact is that they are ok with this shipping and only this one. BUT it's not an excuse to be unhinged or disrespectful, let's keep it to celebrate their cuteness and unique bond.
Now I'm going to address more speculative topics but that's how I read their "message" about Jake and Antonia. I regularly joke about how Nic is copying the way Luke has "launched" Antonia but in reality I think those two situations are handled very differently.
-Antonia is Luke's girlfriend. Around the world tour he let us know that she was his girlfriend. It wasn't really loud, but clear enough to that the invested fandom, especially the shippers, can know that he was in a relationship. And since that, he keeps reminding us of her "status" in his life. He shares nothing else, he just likes every post on her grid and coordinates posts (or at least agrees with her posting just before or after that we know his location) to let us know that they haven't broken up. Again you can think that this relationship isn't real, that it's a cover for his relationship with Nic; that they are not endgame and it's an insecure relationship; that he uses her to annoy Nic when she shows Jake; or that they are hot and heavy and a modern version of Cinderella. The fact is that Luke has said that he is not a "big romantic gesture" guy but he wants us to acknowledge Antonia as his girlfriend, and the ones making her the villain, who is lying to us when she shows they are together, need to explain me why Luke would tolerate that and keep liking her posts. Again I'm really aware of some of her posts that were a little cringe, but girl, I would have endured half the hate she got, at her age, I would have been the worst troll you would have ever seen.
-Nic doesn't want, for now, to label her relationship with Jake. Her behavior even hints at denying a romantic one (I've already said it in another post, the jakolas should keep it really quiet imo) but she's really loud about the fact that she cares A LOT about him and that he is the best. She doesn't hide their closeness even if she gets a lot of criticism for that. Again you can think that he's just a friend, that he's a rebound, that she uses him to make Luke jealous or that they are so in love, the fact is she's clear that she loves him.
So two strategies, one labelling the relationship without sharing anything more, the other showing the deep bond without labelling it, but it should lead to the same behavior from the fandom: leave the significant others alone, they care about them and they are accepted by their entourage (and that even if you don't believe that the public narrative corresponds to reality).
I think all of this is basic decency but as it seems as there is a championship about who is the better fan, we could start to follow those rules. Because... Yeah... If you can't be kind, at least be vague. IYKYK
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