Gonna say something a little controversial here, but the edits/takes that Yoongi's character is abusive in a gay relationship with Jungkook's character don't sit right with me. If you're as chronically deep in the HYYH story as I am, you know from the Notes that Yoongi's thoughts (note that I am always referring to the characters from here on out) don't fit with abuser mentality and he actually attempts to isolate himself as much as possible to avoid hurting people- especially Jungkook- because it's his deepest fear.
If you have only seen the videos, reading them as being an explicit romantic relationship is possible (as in we're only seeing parts of their story, but we don't have any solid proof because they never state outright that they're dating/use romantic endearments/kiss etc), but the much stronger argument is for homosexual/homoromantic subtext. Korea still isn't super gay friendly and it certainly wasn't in 2015. I fully believe the gay subtext for that relationship was PUT THERE by the original creators of those music videos, but Hybe/bighit was too afraid to openly canonize a gay relationship, let alone with the faces of their biggest band which has no out members, they slightly backed off in later additions.
All this to say, the subtext for gay feelings is there, but I don't think we're taking it far enough. What if it's not just subtext for us, the viewers to surmise, what if it's subtext for them, the characters?
If we reinterpret their story to be about two young men who either don't know or are just coming to grips with the fact that they are in love with another man in a homophobic society, Yoongi's actions start to make a lot more sense, don't they?
Yoongi's mom committed suicide when he was young and blamed him for the ruination of his life, but he was closer to her. He is extremely distant and deeply uncomfortable around his father. He paints getting kicked out after getting expelled as an inevitability. Jungkook's dad left him, and now he's got a stepfather that doesn't give him the time of day except to occasionally criticize him, and he and Jungkook's mom only care about his stepbrother. In short, both have some pretty serious daddy issues that would already put them on the fringes of society as far as growing up male. They don't have a father figure to raise and shepherd them through adolescence. Yoongi's very strict, cold, masculine father also screams closet gay experience to me.
So you have two boys with a lot of guilt and inner turmoil to begin with, then they meet each other and are devastated to find a kindred soul for the first time. Especially Yoongi. Because Yoongi wasn't prepared for this. He's already given up on life. He was prepared to just coast through high school unattached and even after he makes friends with the bts boys, he keeps a huge distance from the rest emotionally. He never lets his feelings show, only takes care of them in subtle ways, and no one knows anything about him- Jin doesn't even realize this til a good ways into Save Me. Yoongi is the most suicidal by a mile. Jin can't figure out how to save him because while the others have bad days where they get hurt or hurt themselves, Yoongi can and will kill himself any time anywhere. He's not having a bad day, he's having a bad life. And they're all suffering long term, but a major part of the story is Jin realizing that something happened to Yoongi long ago that broke him, something he can't rewind and fix. The only way to save him is by giving him a reason to care, something to do. But how can he do that if Yoongi never let anyone in?
That's when he realizes it has to be Jungkook. Because Jungkook forced his way in. Jungkook adores Yoongi, and that's exactly what scares him. Yoongi is terrified of Jungkook's love. There is no other word for it. That's why he gets drunk and lashes out. He lashes out at all of them, but he tries to avoid or push Jungkook away the most because he knows Jungkook loves him- how can he not? When the boy follows him everywhere and looks at him with those wide adoring eyes and smiles that sweet little smile and is obsessively drawn to pianos just to chase the high of hearing Yoongi play again. Hell, when Yoongi finds him two years after getting expelled, Jungkook's still playing Yoongi's song from memory. He knows.
But he feels responsible for every bad thing that happens to Jungkook. And he's already too far gone in his misery to keep himself afloat, much less save Jungkook from following in his footsteps. So he just keeps trying to flee and extricate himself from Jungkook's embrace. They fight. But they can't fight like lovers, because they technically aren't. So they fight like friends, which feels wrong. Too intimate.
Then there's the motel scene.
They fight, Yoongi leaves with Jungkook's shirt-or maybe it's one that they shared- Yoongi strokes the empty pillow beside him in a bed for two mournfully. And then he kills himself. The Notes takes it farther and confirms this was all about Jungkook, about his guilt for lashing out. He doesn't call anyone for attention. He doesn't drag Jungkook back in by asking for help or apologizing while he threatens to do it. He just thinks, 'I am the problem. I'm rotten to the core. I have to save him from me.'
Subtext. No break up, but they were in love. They both knew it, but they were both scared. Many gay people I know had toxic 'friendships' before they came out. That's what I think Yoongi's violence was. Not an abuser who does what he wants and thinks it's justified and he should get away with it, but a terrified closeted boy with the lifelong ingrained message that he destroys everything he touches. Too scared to even speak the words of what's 'wrong' with him, let alone act on them, taint somebody else's life. Korean society- and I'm sorry to be the one to report this if you weren't aware- but it speaks of homosexuality as a disease invented and brought in from the west. And that's exactly how hyyh yoongi behaves- like he's a poison. A virus. A necrotic plague destroying all in its wake. A leper that must be quarantined.
I love you. I'm terrified. I'll ruin you. I'm broken in more ways than one.
izzy806
turnnoffyourmind
yousharknotpass
pixelskylines
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