most ardently

star wars url bc yea | mainly poetry & probably no fanfiction | hover for links

[misfitcaravan]

turns out, i’m happier without you. i didn’t see how much happiness you were sucking from me. i loved you so much, i was blind to myself. i hope i find my light again.

[punlovsin]

[misfitcaravan]

people i hate:

1. people who cheat

11. people who know they’re participating in cheating

111. people who know they’re getting cheated on and don’t end it

people i hate:

1. you

11. her

111. me

[misfitcaravan]

if i could pick one word

to describe myself

it would be fool

fool to think

i’d get to stay happy

if i could pick one word

to describe myself

it would be fool

fool to think i was strong enough to handle this

[misfitcaravan]

“I think I need a break from reaching out to you. Trying to talk to you, it’s making me feel...” and at once a thousand words came to mind. Sad, disjointed, unneeded, unwanted, melancholy, disconnected. “More alone than I should feel.”

- another excerpt from that soulmate story i’ll never write, because i found myself thinking about my two lonely OCs in orbit

[misfitcaravan]

If you are the moon, then I am the sun. And if you are the ocean, then I am the moon. I will yearn for companionship, and you will never know.

1 am thoughts | k.h. (via xwinggs)

[misfitcaravan]

"I have this list," she tells me, pulling a moleskin from her backpack. "It's a little dumb, but I call it details of me, in case there's ever anyone who'd fall for me. The things I think they'd like to know." She reads me the list, her cheeks red and hair falling in her face. "It makes me sad when it rains in the winter, because that should be snow. I envy sunflowers, because they can grow so tall and drink the sun. I wish my dad could see the moon  from his garden and I think of him when the stars fill the sky. And I throw out food for the rabbits I see in the courtyard, in case they're getting hungry. I'd like my future love to know that I imagine myself in fictional worlds to cope with this all. And how I wish I could see myself through a loved ones eyes, because I'm often lost in my own sadness." As she reads, I look at her and all I can think is that she doesn't know that I've already fallen.

another excerpt from the novel i’ll never write, k.h.

[jeremyknox]

Rest In Peace, Carrie Fisher. You will forever be in our hearts. You inspired so many of us to face our fears and accept our mental illnesses. For that, we can never thank you enough. The force is with you, may it be in all of us.

[jeremyknox]

Hey guys. I wrote a kind of emotional thing about Trump. It’s the night before the election, maybe help me spread this around???

[misfitcaravan]

I can barely remember theorists but I remember every word we exchanged that night.

k.h. / lines from a letter i’ll never send

[misfitcaravan]

I wish you'd stop making my heart feel so full.

- k.h. / lines from a letter i'll never send

[misfitcaravan]

I hate that I semi-lied to you about what was wrong. I just want to tell you how I feel. But that’s what this letter is for - pretending to tell you the truth.

k.h. / lines from a letter i’ll never send

[misfitcaravan]

last summer, I walked hand-in-hand with my best friend down the streets of Philly. it was the 4th of July and I drew Pride flags on my arm, celebrating the 50th anniversary of LGBT civil rights in my city we laughed in joy, feeling safe and secure we are girls who love girls and proud of it. we went to the museum exhibits and rolled our eyes at bigots. “Jesus hates gays” “well, damn, I thought He and I were good.” Pride Month 2015. the summer where love was free to be love and same sex marriage was legalized. we told everyone: “do not think that this is the end, there’s so much more to fight for.” it was a period of happiness in a tumultuous fight for our rights. fast forward to this summer: it’s June 12th and I’m blinking away sleep to check social media. it’s Pride Month 2016 and the largest mass shooting in the U.S. is a hate crime at a gay club in Orlando. I go to church, wishing to wake up from this nightmare against my community. I didn’t go to Philly’s Pride Parade that Sunday I hid in my room, I blogged and prayed. my best friend is far away I told her about the shooting, I thought she already knew we’re so tired. I drew Pride flags on my leg. I’m not laughing anymore.

what a difference a year doesn’t make

[misfitcaravan]

it's not that i won't it's that i can't   i can't i can't  i can't   please stop pushing me wait until i can   i can  i can i can    one day i will

recovery | k.h.

[sinedra]

Remember, you will always be growing as a writer. There is no peak, only improvement. It’s a continual learning curve and you can only go up from here. So keep writing lovelies.

[misfitcaravan]

i love the thought that we have anchors that keep us grounded others that can keep us human   but what if who you thought was your anchor only makes you drown?

k.h.

[misfitcaravan]

I deserve to be loved ...don't I?

2 am uncertainty | k.h.