Mishel E. 18. CEB/MNL, PH. I love wasting my time scouring bookshelves, collecting pretty notebooks,...
New blog, once again. It's time for a fresh start :)
Xuebing Du
One Nice Bug Per Day
Sweet Seals For You, Always

tannertan36
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

Kaledo Art
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Andulka
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
trying on a metaphor
Jules of Nature

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
Show & Tell
YOU ARE THE REASON
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
occasionally subtle

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣

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@mishel-esque
Mishel E. 18. CEB/MNL, PH. I love wasting my time scouring bookshelves, collecting pretty notebooks,...
New blog, once again. It's time for a fresh start :)
Earlier today while walking around Fort San Pedro (CEB, PH).
untitled on Flickr.
Today was quite productive! That's a first, considering the fact that it's a Sunday, and Sundays will are always my lazy days. Anyway, here's today, in bullets:
Had my nails done. Hello there, shiny, shimmery babies!
Re-read TFIOS because you just can't not read it again.
Finished playing with my old PE shirt (tie-dyed version will be posted soon!)
Also, it's almost August! Which means it's almost my birthday. I still can't believe I'll be turning seventeen soon, and I honestly have mixed emotions about everything. Sweet sixteen will always be my favorite, but I'm still looking forward to turning a year older.
So happy birthday (in advance) to myself, 'Dy, and Mags!
That's it... For now. Hehe. ☺
Goodnight, everyone ♥
Today, in bullets:
Woke up at around 7 AM and prepared for school.
Found out that my 9 AM class was cancelled, and studied for PolSci 11 (because we all thought that there would be a short quiz every meeting...)
Only to find out that our quiz was cancelled as well.
So during lunch time, we all decided to review for our History test.
Also, I had to run from the Admin steps all the way to Malax with my iPad stuffed inside my shirt because it was raining.
After the test, my friends and I rewarded ourselves with food. :)
I Will Follow You Into the Dark - Death Cab for Cutie
i feel like this song is so powerful. just so deep and powerful. they played this live at Brucie’s 40th day too and it was the song he performed at his prom. from the song’s wiki page “the song details the singer’s promise to a loved one to remain by her side even after death.”
Love of mine some day you will die But I’ll be close behind I’ll follow you into the dark No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white Just our hands clasped so tight Waiting for the hint of a spark If Heaven and Hell decide That they both are satisfied Illuminate the NOs on their vacancy signs If there’s no one beside you When your soul embarks Then I’ll follow you into the dark In Catholic school as vicious as Roman rule I got my knuckles bruised by a lady in black And I held my tongue as she told me “Son fear is the heart of love” So I never went back If Heaven and Hell decide That they both are satisfied Illuminate the NOs on their vacancy signs If there’s no one beside you When your soul embarks Then I’ll follow you into the dark You and me have seen everything to see From Bangkok to Calgary And the soles of your shoes are all worn down The time for sleep is now It’s nothing to cry about ‘cause we’ll hold each other soon In the blackest of rooms If Heaven and Hell decide That they both are satisfied Illuminate the No’s on their vacancy signs If there’s no one beside you When your soul embarks Then I’ll follow you into the dark Then I’ll follow you into the dark
A few months ago, I promised to post about what happened to one of my best friends, Carlo. Quite frankly, it was the most devastating thing that ever happened to me, and I honestly feel uncomfortable typing these words right now as it's going to be the first time I'm ever telling his story to people I don't know. But I feel like I somehow have to, not because I owe anyone an explanation, but because I need to vent out these feelings, even if it means feeling uneasy as I do so.
Anyway, like I said, that's Carlo. Carlo Luigie N. Flores is one of my best friends. Or at least he used to be. On the 12th of May this year, he passed away due to Arteriovenous Malformation. It came as a complete shock to everyone because he was still so young, and everything happened too fast.
During my first year in high school, I was a new student. Obviously, I didn't know anyone and I had a hard time making friends during the first few weeks because I was too shy and quiet. Carlo was a classmate of mine, and on the first day, he already caught my attention because of the joke he cracked in class. Fast forward to a month or so later, we were already acquainted with each other and, okay, I admit, I had a (not-so) little crush on him.
So... Of course I had to try being his friend, right? 'Cause that's what we usually do to catch our crush's attention. *wink wink* It worked, and we slowly became closer and closer. Although the little schoolgirl crush I had on him vanished, the exact opposite was happening to our friendship.
During our Sophomore year, we found ourselves in different sections. We weren't as close as we used to be, but we were still friends nonetheless. It wasn't until the latter part of our second year that we tried rekindling the friendship we once had. At the time, we felt like it came naturally due to the fact that one of my closest friends was already in a relationship with him, and so what we had the previous year was not just restored, it also became something much better.
Our Junior year in high school was more significant than the previous years, because we became classmates again. Everyday we ate lunch together along with our friends, and we knew each other so well it's as if we've been friends our whole lives. I remember constantly serving as a bridge between him and Bea (his girlfriend), and whenever they would have a problem, Pat and I sought ways to help them fix their problem right away.
Sadly, when we reached our final year in high school, our group split because of various reasons (though conflict within the barkada was not one of the reasons... Okay, maybe a little. At first.), and we would rarely see each other at school. Nevertheless, Carlo and I maintained our strong bond by hanging out during dismissal time everyday. Needless to say, despite the challenges, our friendship was still as strong as it used to be, if not stronger.
On the evening of May 10, 2012, I received the most surprising news ever: Carlo was going through two operations due to internal bleeding in his cerebellum. Hoping and praying was all that was left for me to do.
I've never really felt so lost in my entire life. First of all, I was in a different place when I heard what was going on, so I had to ask Bea to keep me updated. She would always tell me about his condition, and by the time they declared him brain dead, she begged me to come back as the doctors slowly broke it to her and Carlo's family; they knew he wasn't going to make it, and I knew I had to see him soon, before he would let go. So I told my dad I had to go back to Manila, and I completely broke down in front of him. It was the first time my dad ever saw me cry, and that was the breaking point of everything. That very day, my dad had booked tickets so that I would be able to see Carlo.
Around 40 minutes before Carlo's passing, I called Bea up and asked her to put the phone against Carlo's ear so that he could hear me as I spoke. I told him that I was going to see him the next day, and I asked him to wait for me. As I hung up, I HOPED I'd be able to make it just in time. Unfortunately, he couldn't hold on any longer.
The day of his wake was the most vague of them all. Everything was a blur. I've never cried so hard before, and standing in front of his cold, unmoving body was the worst thing I ever had to do. My best friend was laid out in front of me, but he no longer had the chance to know that I was there. Gone are the moments when we would laugh with (sometimes at) each other. Gone are the chances we have of ever feeling that way again.
It's not easy trying to recover from a huge loss, but I'm doing the best that I could. I'm slowly starting to accept the fact that he is no longer with us, and I try to make myself feel better by telling myself that he's happy now.
We love you, Carlo. And we miss you terribly. Rest in peace, Tot.
Today, I lost not just my best friend, but the brother I never had.
I love you, Carlo. We all love you. You will be missed.
Lengthy post coming up when I finally have the strength to write about what happened.
On hiatus.
Hi ate Mishel. My prayers are all for Carlo. How is he right now? I know God heard all of us and He's being looked over. I hope his family, ate Bea and his friends including you continue being strong. God bless!
Hello, Pam! He has 27 hours left to respond. Otherwise... I'm not strong enough to say it, or write it down, or even think about it. No matter what happens though, I know that it'll happen for a reason, and it's all a part of God's plan. We're trying our best to be strong, thank you. God bless you too!
Hi everyone.
One of my best friends, Carlo Flores, is in the hospital right now suffering a brain condition, and I would like to ask all of you to please spare a minute or two to offer a prayer for his speedy recovery. He is currently in a comatose, and as much as it pains me to say this, his chances of waking up are pretty slim.
I don't want to lose him. Please pray. Please.
050712 || Cebu!
Tricia and I being vain. Same old same old!
And yes, this was in the iStore.
It's a mixture of anguish and relief as I see the two of you standing close -- too close, if you ask me -- next to each other at the movie theater. Your hand moves slowly down her arm, and engulfs her own. Her little fingers intertwine with yours, and I think to myself, that used to be me. But it used to be her, too. You've found your way back to her. She is your home. A fiery sensation runs through my veins like electricity, but then I realize that the pain isn't as intense as it used to be. I've grown slightly numb. No, no. I've only learned to be indifferent. Because I always knew. I could never dumb myself down for you, you see. I'm not like her. I'm not her.
There's always a reason to smile. Find it. ☺ (Taken with instagram)